TTISI: Final Fantasy IX (Part 3sy squeezy) · 5:17pm Apr 21st, 2020
An ice wizard? It’s rather cool to meet you!... Alright, I’ll kill you now.
BeeP
Yellow (Vivi): Hey, what happened? Why was everyone knocked out?
Will (Zidane): Uuuuuh *flashback to the ice wizard I killed, which looked like Yellow except taller and darker, which would give Yellow an existential crisis*..., don’t worry about it.
BeeP
Garnet: I shall go into town-
Will: First, you need a new name. We can’t just announce that the princess is in town.
Garnet: Okay.
Me: I could call her a discount famous person.
McFaggot, if he had heard me: IDENTITY IS NOT A JOKE JIM, MILLIONS OF FAMILIES SUFFER EVERY YEAR.
Garnet: Hey, what’s this knife thing?
Will: A dagger.
Garnet: Sounds like a good name for me.
Me: Wait a minute, as your God, I get to choose if it’s a good name!... Yeah, it’s good enough. I can’t think of anything funny.
BeeP
So, I kinda realized that McFaggot (Steiner) is a lot like Papyrus. Like, when I read his lines, I can hear something that sounds like Papyrus’ voice, but deeper. Like, c’mon, look at him.
Another thing I realized, is that it feels like a Dungeons and Dragons campaign. Now, normally, when I play DND, I’m playing a character that, one way or another, is fudged up. For instance, my first character was an alcoholic rogue that practically becomes an arsonist if he’s ever sober. Then, the next character, is a warlock that made a pact with a Kraken, and he uses all these water-type spells, but he doesn’t know how to swim and he gets ptsd when he’s in stomach-level of water.
When I DM’d for a campaign, I think I’m horrible at it, but I’ll talk about that later. The point is, I think I really like this game because it’s like a game of Dungeons and Dragons!
BeeP
Me: Oh cool a town.
Random kids: Oh shizzle, is that...?
Me: Uh, I think we may have to hide Dagger.
BeeP
Inn keeper: Ooohoohooo *insert creepy laugh*
Me: Okay, we reeaaally need to hide Dagger.
BeeP
Me: Hey Yellow, what’s up?
Yellow: I keep hearing these strange noises
Will: Oh, that’s just the Chocobo.
Chocobo: Kyweh!
Me: *wonders where the fuck that came from*
BeeP
Will: Hey Dagger, where’s Yellow.
Dagger: *shrugs*
Me: Hm. A bit worrisome.
BeeP
Me: I’ve literally looked everywhere, he’s not here, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY BOI!!! WHO THE FUCK TOUCHA MY CHILD!?!?
BeeP
Yellow: *voices comes through a pipe in the ground* I-I’m scared, the adults told me to stay here, and I d-don’t know what t-to do...
Me: I’m coming for you! Just stay where you are my boy, I gotchu!
BeeP
Yellow is precious and should be protected at all costs.