The Results Concerning "Grief" and the Editing Thereof · 5:24pm Mar 17th, 2020
About a week ago, I posted a blog seeking to survey you all about how much interest there was in seeing a "final edit" of "Grief is the Price We Pay." It was my hope that, once I tallied up all the responses, it would definitely decide whether or not there was enough cause for me to continue with the project.
Instead, it's been mostly half and half.
To be sure, a lot of you said yes...but by my count, nearly just as many said they were indifferent or chose the "other" option, giving me a fairly "meh" impression, by which I mean that there was definitely an interest if such an edit came about, but not so much that it was something people felt they had to have--if it didn't happen anyway, they could live with that. And on both sides, there were people that were saying yes they were interested...if certain conditions were met, conditions I couldn't guarantee or were just never part of the plan or were ever going to be.
I fear I also didn't convey clearly enough just what exactly this "final edit" was going to entail. Sure, there were to be changes, but many not as dramatic as some seem to think. Yes, there would still be some notable ones--as already said, "Stratagem" through "The Grove" would've been heavily reworked--but most of the rest of the story would probably still appear mostly the same to the untrained eye unless you did a word-by-word comparison. (That's why the edited version would replace the old--the edited version wouldn't be different enough to truly merit being posted as an entirely separate version.)
In any case, the survey didn't clearly make the choice for me, so I'm still left in the position of being the one to make the deciding vote myself. In retrospect, probably should've just quietly done that in the first place then and not risked getting anybody's hopes up...
...but basically I reviewed how I felt about proceeding with the edit, and...well...I remain quite proud of how "Grief" turned out (despite some of the controversy 
) and still have some ideas I think could make a good story even better still. But I think I'm also just plumb burned out on the whole thing too. Part of the reason this final edit has taken as long as it has to get this far and still not be finished is because I realized that at some point I started doing it less because I truly wanted to and more because I just felt obligated to. Now it's instead become something of a blockage standing in the way of other projects I'm more truly feel interested in turning towards to. And with no real clear timetable on how much longer this final edit will take before its finally finished...you can hopefully see how finishing it started to become a chore.
But when I consider dropping the project, I feel freed up and the path ahead clear again. And I liked that thought so much that, I admit, no sooner had I posted that survey that I was hoping the majority opinion would clearly be in the negative, giving me that convenient excuse to drop it with a clear conscience.
And upon realizing that, I saw I didn't actually need the survey anyway--I already had my answer.
So I do very much apologize for getting anybody's hopes up in vain...but no, I will NOT be continuing with the final edit of "Grief," and will instead let it stand as it is for the time being.
But, I'll certainly hang on to what progress I've made of the edit anyway...just in case I might one day become motivated again to come back and finish what I had started.
Even if its not going to be completed, I'm grateful you decided to annouce you weren't going to complete the final edit instead of just letting it hang uncompleted.
Edit: even if chapter "And Now I See" needs major rewritting. I just can't let that go apparently.
It's fine that you decided not to rewrite it.
It's time to take those lessons you learned and move on to more things!
Go, young writer! Be free!
Thanks for the update on the non-update!
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The problem with Pharynx was that he was formally introduced in the show after I already had a good share of the story written and the rest pretty much planned out, leaving no real spot where I could've squeezed him in and made it worth it, and that's why he's pretty much absent from the story--he was introduced at a time when I was no longer in a position to make good use of him.
However, though he's not referred to by name, he was established as appearing for Thorax's funeral, at which he's not quite able to hide his tearing up.
Being the tough guy he is, I imagine Pharynx did most of his mourning privately and to himself, putting on the brave face in front of everyone else where he could. As in the show, though, he is late to reform, and for awhile, because of the circumstances it happened under, holds a grudge against the reformed as well as fears the reformed changelings were leaving themselves defenseless and all that. But he'd eventually still come around. Assuming I were to write a sequel, I'd probably have Pharynx eventually become king in Thorax's stead.