Wanderer D 4,964 followers · 54 stories

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News Archive

  • 5 weeks
    SA: Round 164

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Matthew walked the quiet halls of the Seattle’s Angels compound, taking in this brief moment of peace and tranquillity. Many of the staff had taken off for the holidays, leaving just a few stragglers behind to finish up the year’s work. Next year’s posts still loomed large, but Matthew could ignore it for now and enjoy the—

    A crash came from the Angels’ office area, interrupting Matthew’s inner exposition. Sighing, he headed into the large work area so see Intern struggle to get a small flying drone under control. The drone crashed into Corejo’s desk, splintering the wooden structure into kindling before taking off again. Straight for Matthew.

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    3 comments · 1,407 views
  • 9 weeks
    SA: Round 163

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Heartshine sat by the fireplace, waiting. She had everything laid out, just like Cynewolf had said. Pumpkin pie, Pumpkin muffins, Pumpkin spice latté, and of all things, Ugg boots. Heartshine was skeptical when Cynewulf said that the boots were necessary for the ritual, but who was she to question the wisdom of human traditions?

    Slowly, the clock on the wall ticked, and yet nothing happened.

    The door behind her swung open, and Intern poked his head in.

    “Uh, what are you doing?”

    “I’m waiting for the Great Pumpkin!” Heartshine cheerfully replied, pointing at her offerings to the human nature spirit. “Cynewulf said that humans celebrate Thank and Giving with pumpkins to appease the Great Pumpkin. She said if you’re good, you get presents and a good harvest!”

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    14 comments · 2,468 views
  • 10 weeks
    SA: Round 162

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Matthew slung his arm over the top of the office divider. “Hey, Drake. I heard you wanted to talk to someone?”

    Drake turned around from his deck, looking at a piece of paper in his hands. “I was just looking at my schedule here. According to this, I’m on the crew for reviews this week?”

    Matthew nodded. “That’s right.”

    “But, I was on the review crew last time, too. And I just started here.” Drake scratched his head. “How come I’ve been assigned a double on my first month?”

    “Well, all the review spots are assigned on a volunteer basis.”

    Drake shifted his eyes from side to side. “I didn’t volunteer for this week.”

    “No, but everyone else didn’t not not volunteer before you, so, yeah.” Matthew shrugged. “It happens.”

    Drake slumped in his chair. “So I’m doing a double shift on my first month here.”

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    3 comments · 2,264 views
  • 13 weeks
    SA: Round 161

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Intern sighed, looking at his clock built into his heads up display for the dozenth time. He tapped his foot impatiently, arms crossed, and passing the time by whistling a formless tune. No wonder no one else wanted to invite the new guy in when it was going to be this boring.

    His clock beeped. At precisely that moment, the mirror Intern stood in front of began to glow and churn. The sound of an engine revving up could be heard somewhere beyond the swirl of space/time.

    Intern scratched his head. “I could of sworn we’ve done this bit before…”

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    6 comments · 2,920 views
  • 13 weeks
    SA: Round 160

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    “Who was the intern again?”

    Chris turned with a baffled look. “What? And also, what the heck?”

    Cyne held his hand as he swayed back and forth over the endless abyss. The bridge linking the Infinite Archives with the District of a Thousand Delicatessens had given out as it did every 20 hours or so, because the ever growing labyrinth that made up the Seattle’s Angels HQ bunker. They’d just messed up the timing by a hair.

    “Yeah, who was the intern?” Cynewulf asked again, regardless of the dire circumstances. “I keep forgetting and by rights at some point it should have been me?”


    “For pony’s sake please pull me up right th—“


    “Furthermore,” she continued, her lupine claws digging in as she pulled him up but by bit, “why do we have interns? And how did we come to be here?”

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    6 comments · 3,162 views
  • 17 weeks
    SA: Round 159

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    If there was one thing Intern had learned during his time with Seattle’s Angels, it was that the reviewers really valued their downtime. Scouring for new stories to feature was exhausting work, not to mention the time it took to write perfect posts week in and week out. A chance to get away from that, even for a few fleeting minutes, was more precious than Zap Apple jam spread over a slice of apple pie on a cool evening overlooking the picturesque view of the compound’s vast corn syrup fields.

    “Want to tone it down on the metaphor, there?”

    Intern started at hearing Matthew’s voice right behind him. He whirled around, slapping his laptop shut, and holding it protectively against his chest. “Mine!”

    Matthew cocked his head. “Have you been getting into our supply of poison joke again?”

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    4 comments · 2,813 views
  • 19 weeks
    SA: Round 158

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Heartshine flew just a couple inches over Paul’s shoulder, rubbing her hooves together anxiously. “Are you sure you want to do this? You don’t have to if you don’t want to, y’know.”

    Paul glanced over his shoulder at her, eyebrow raised. “For the last time, yes. I don’t see any reason not to.”

    She flitted about his head like an agitated bird, her voice gaining a slightly higher pitch. “B-but, what if somepony finds out what we’re doing? You have a reputation. A good one! I don’t want to ruin that.”

    He rolled his eyes, hand on the doorknob to his office. “If I’m okay with everyone knowing I’m a brony, then I’m okay with this. So relax! What we’ve got together is special, Heartshine, and I’m not going to let anything get in the way of that.”

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    6 comments · 2,016 views
  • 21 weeks
    SA: Round 157

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Matthew walked into Corejo’s broom closet office. “Hey Cor, all my reviews are done, we just need yours and an intro/outro and we should be good.”

    Corejo looked up from his chalkboard computer. “Just got one left, but all my others are done. I’ll hand ‘em in once it’s done.”

    “Alright, cool. Any ideas for the intro stuff?”

    “Not really.” Corejo shrugged. “Unless you wanna transcribe this conversation. People will think it’s funny. Until they’re like, ‘you’re not funny.’ And then we’ll be had.”

    ROUND 157

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    10 comments · 2,073 views
  • 24 weeks
    SA: Round 156

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    “Put them over there, if you would.”

    Intern did as instructed as best he could with his vision impared by a small hill of boxes and bags. Wobbling with so much merchandise in his grip to fill a Hot Topic shop, he somehow managed to set it all down with nary a single plushie falling. He sighed with relief, wiping some sweat from his brow. “Is that all of it?”

    Cynewulf eyed him as though he had asked if she could speak color. “What? Heaven’s no, that was just the first hour at the con. I’ve got three days worth still for you to bring in.”

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    4 comments · 2,228 views
  • 25 weeks
    SA: Round 155

    Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


    Ebon Quill wandered down the empty hallway.  How long had he been walking? Hours, it seemed.  Why did the SA headquarters have a twenty mile long hallway?  He wasn’t sure, but he felt with a deep-seated certainty that, if he did know, he’d hate the answer.  Pausing to wipe his brow, he knocked on a door with a resigned passivity borne of the knowledge that, if the last 2,231 rooms had been empty, the odds of finding a human in this one were low.

    “Coming!” came a chipper voice from inside.

    A moment later, Chris threw the door open.  “Ah, Ebsy, you’re just in time!” Throwing an arm around Quill, Chris ushered him into the room.  “Come on, we’ve got reviews to write.”

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    5 comments · 2,130 views
Jan
12th
2020

Story Reviews » SA: Round 164 · 1:31am January 12th

Seattle's Angels is a group that promotes good stories with low views. You can find us here.


Chris walked down the corridors of Seattle’s Angels HQ, sipping a cup of coffee as he went. 

“Did Matthew really have to have everyone come in today? I know it’s the first meeting of the year, but this is ridiculous,” he said as he took another sip. 

As he made his way into the conference room, he took notice that the table seemed…. Bigger… than it was when he left for the holidays. 

He plopped to his seat next to EbonQuill. “Does the table seem bigger to you, or is it just me?”

“Didn’t you get the email?” EbonQuill questioned. “Matthew said he was bringing on the newbies to start off the new year. ‘New Year, New Blood,’ I think he called it.”

Not in the right frame of mind to be caught by surprise, Chris took another sip of his coffee, his visage one of exasperation. 

“Come on!” Chris tapped his wifi router, attempting to figure out the source of its malfunction. Meanwhile, snow continued to pile outside. “Work, you damn thing!”

“I was…. busy,” was all he told him.

It was at that moment, thankfully for Chris, that Matthew entered the room. “Morning everyone! Thank you all so much for coming. I thought it’d be best we were all here so we could start this year off right.”

“Cut to the chase, Matthew.” RTStephens urged. “We already gave all our “okays,” let’s just meet ‘em.”

“It’s called ‘buildup,’ Stephens,” Matthew rebutted. “What can I say? I live the writer's life both at and away from the laptop.”

Chris took another sip of his coffee. 

“Come on in, guys!” Matthew called into the hallway. Four new faces entered the conference room, taking seats at the newly enlarged table, one of which seemed to take in the room a bit more than one might think.

“Everyone, I’d like you to meet FloydienSlip, Casketbase77, FanficReader920, and Winter_Solstice.” Matthew introduced, each waving to the rest of the Angels so they knew who Matthew was referring to. “Now that the show has….. run its course…… this group needs more hands than ever. So, a big thanks to you four for volunteering your time. As for the rest of you, so that we can integrate the newbies into our ranks in an effective manner, I’d like to recommend four of you to try and collaborate with one of them for their first round of reviews. Show ‘em the ropes about how things work around here. We clear?”

The returning Angels all gave an affirmative thumbs up.

“Perfect. I trust all of your bookshelves have gained some holiday weight, so I’ll leave you all to it. I’m gonna go grab a sandwich.” Matthew said as he turned to leave the room.

“Oh, I’ll take a….” Unfortunately, Corejo’s request fell on deaf ears as the door slammed behind Matthew as he left.

A few hours later…...

Chris emerged from his cubicle with an empty water bottle. However, on his way toward the water cooler, he happened upon a cubicle of one of the newbies, FanficReader920.

Now that he was properly functioning as a human being, he now had the capacity to realize that this is one of the applicants that brought some….. Memories for him.

So the problem (and yes, it IS a problem) with music links in a story (especially to real-world music (and especially if it’s not a song the reader is familiar with)) is that it breaks immersion.  And now I’m going to spend three paragraphs expanding on that single point… but in conclusion, everything else about the story is pretty good, 4.5 out of 5.5 stars!

The veteran reviewer cringed. When he had read FanficReader920’s application to the Angels , thankfully before the blizzard had hit, it led to a bit of self-reflection on his part. He’d been reviewing stories for nearly 8 years, and when he looked at his reviews from back then and now, it was like night and day.

“No one deserves being subjected to that,” he muttered to himself. “But first, that refill.”

Once his water bottle had been filled, he gave a knock on the younger reviewers cubicle.

“It’s open… or at least it would be if I had a door…. Which I don’t,” FanficReader920 swiveled around toward his visitor. “Oh hey, you were the one with the coffee? Feeling awake now?”

“Verily,” Chris replied. “Never fully human for the day without it. I’m Chris, by the way.”

“Wait… you mean Chris…. Like THAT Chris?” the junior reviewer gaped.
Chris gave a small smile and held out his hand. “Yes, THAT Chris.”

“Wow, nice to meet you, man,” FanficReader920 took it and shook his hand with the veteran. “I remember reading your stuff for the Royal Canterlot Library. I used to recommend stories to you guys for ages.”

“Oh yeah, I remember you. The recommendation thread hadn’t been filled that quickly in a while.”

“Eh, I like to think I can sniff out a pretty great story. I gave myself that Pen Name for a reason, you know.”

“Say,” Chris proposed. “Since we’re both on the same playing field now, and Matthew is probably going to bug me about it if I don’t, would you like to team up together for your first round? “

“Would I!”

“Would you?”

The junior reviewer hesitated for a second before he realized the reference. “Would I!” 

“Would you?”

“Would I!”

“Would you?”

“Would I what?”

“Team up for your first round…”

“Would I!”

The two couldn’t get any further before the began cracking up.

“I can already tell this is gonna be fun,” FanficReader920 remarked.

ROUND 164


After her girlfriend, Twilight Sparkle, commits suicide, Sunset Shimmer attends her funeral.



One of the things I always hoped for with the Equestria Girls franchise was that it would be able to tackle stories that were more grounded in reality than they would be if they took place in Equestria. Granted, Hasbro wouldn't ever do a story where the main character grapples with the suicide of another main character, but hey, that's what fanfiction writers are for! As far as writing goes, Aquaman takes us on an intimate journey through the mind of Sunset Shimmer as she grapples with the suicide of Sci-Twi, her girlfriend at the time.

When you've read as many horse words as I have, you tend to notice the difference between a story with faked and genuine emotions. In this story, Sunset delivers some of the rawest emotions I've read in a long time. I also really like the way the story is structured. It does a great job of building up to the emotionally intense part of the story, then letting the reader down easy afterwards for a conclusion that leaves one affected, but also satisfied.

Considering the story’s subject matter, I’m amazed at how well Aquaman handled it. I'll admit, I actually needed to take a moment to process this story after I finished reading it. I've never had the misfortune of having to go through the suicide of a loved one (and I pray I don't ever have to), but after reading Sunset's experience here, I now have a distinct feeling this would be roughly what it's like. Read this story and be blown away by Aquaman's no-holds-barred tale of grief.

There are a lot of stories in this fandom that are, at best, “nominally-fanfiction.”  By this I mean stories that may use the names of one or more canon characters, may revolve around characters described as having hooves (FiM) or disturbing skin tones (EqG), and so on… but to which all of those things are irrelevant.  Where the names could be changed and the characters could all be ordinary people in our ordinary world, and it wouldn’t make one lick of difference to the story.

Most of the time, these nominal-fanfics are pretty bad, because they reveal that the author doesn’t understand what setting and character really are.  But every now and then, you find a nominal-fanfic that is the exception which proves the rule. To wit: Aquaman’s Zealots of Canterlot.  You could find-replace the names here with a bunch of Abigales and Stacys, and lose exactly zero story fidelity.

But that isn’t because the author doesn’t know how to write EqG.  It’s because the particular lense he choses to look at suicide and coping through is so very universal, so very real, that it cannot be circumscribed within a “fanfiction” context.  It’s a story about people hurting, and that story is equally valid through any setting involving human interaction, because that’s exactly what this story is—human.

So, is this a good fanfic?  I would say not. But don’t let that stop you from reading it, because what it is is a poignant, powerful story. 


In an attempt to be noticed by Chiffon Swirl, Carrot Cake enters the same baking competition as her. Only one problem, he only knows how to make one thing.


Despite the Cakes being the show’s first ever onscreen couple (They were first introduced in the 4th episode), I’m surprised we never got any hint as to how the two either met or got together in the show proper. Well, bring your cats, fandom, because Epic Yarn is here to fill in that gap. 

As opposed to the Romeo and Juliet-esque love story of her friend, Pear Butter, Chiffon Swirl’s love story is straight out of a Rom Com. As much as we know them as the hard-working parents and proprietors of Sugarcube Corner, it’s nice to see them as anxious, stressed out….. young adults? teenagers? (Seriously, how old are all of these ponies?) My point is that Epic Yarn beautifully weaves wit and charm into the characters of Carrot and Chiffon. And, in true Rom Com fashion, Pear Butter does a great job playing the supportive friend. However, what steals the story for me is Carrot’s mother. Carrot’s home life was very intriguing and could easily make for a great story all it’s own, but it’s his mother who I remember most even days after first reading the story.  

Romances can be a very tricky to handle in fiction, but Epic Yarn pulled it off. It combines the charm of a coming-of-age tale with the earnestness and wit of a rom com to deliver a story that makes me appreciate the Cakes even more.

If I had to pick one word to describe this story, it would be “cute.”  And, I mean, isn’t that why we’re all here, on this site? Because we like cute ponies?  So really, isn’t “cute” about the highest praise one can give on FiMFic?

Whether you agree with that chain of logic or not, though, Sweet Carrots is a wonderful little romp.  Structured in the form of a classic rom-com, this is a rather predictable little fic: once you know the players, the conflict, and the third-act exposure that’s coming, you can see all the pieces falling into place long before they land.  But that’s fine, because the joy in this story isn’t in being surprised by it; it’s in following it along on its merry ride. It’s in the author’s wonderful little descriptive touches around the corner. It’s in the light humor which suffuses this entire piece of writing.

In short, this is a story which loses exactly nothing by knowing the ending.  Because in the end, the journey is what matters, not the destination. So in rom-coms, and so in life.


This might be the story of Berry Punch going home with a time traveler, or it might be the story of what happens after.
Time travel is confusing enough when you aren't rip-roaring drunk, y'know?


Ah, yes. Time Travel: Everyone’s favorite storytelling device. Considering logic goes out the window (despite many attempts to keep it inside the bloody house) whenever this concept comes up in fiction, it’s a testament that CoffeeMinion takes note from some of the best of time travel stories: Make the consequences of the time travel so hilarious and ridiculous that the reader doesn’t care about how illogical the scenario is and simply enjoys its consequences. Dr. Hooves and Berry Punch could very well be invoking a million paradoxes in Fluid Exchange Under Closed Timelike Curves, but the situations that arise as a result are simply too hilariously presented to NOT enjoy.

It helps that these two make such a great comedic duo (trio? quartet?) that you can’t help but get sucked into the ridiculousness like Berry chugging a cider. CoffeeMinion delivered a perfectly paced story as well, with Berry starting out the story alone to establish her sluggish,laid back attitude before throwing the awkward and dramatic Doctor into the mix and rom that point on, just sit back and enjoy the ride. Like any great comedic duo, the juxtaposition of these two characters is where most of the humor comes from and it delivers in spades.

So, if you’re one that enjoys laughing at wibbly wobbly timey wimey shenanigans, then give this story a shot.

Dr. Hooves!  Remember when that was a thing?  Pepperidge Farm remembers.  Anyway, if you’d told me back in 2011 that, six years later in 2017, people would still be writing fics about his wacky shenanigans, I’d have been surprised.  But then if you’d actually shown me Fluid Exchange Under Closed Timelike Curves, I’d have probably said something to the effect of, “Okay, yeah, that’s pretty good tho.”  Because CoffeeMinion knows how to combine the wackiness of your better (or at least, sillier) Whos with everyone’s favorite Ponyville drunkard, Berry Punch.

For a story that plays with timey-wimeyness about as much as a 1500 word fic can without becoming hopelessly convoluted, this is actually quite easy to follow, to its credit.  It’s perhaps not the most “pony” story in the world, leaning a little more into its crudity than you might expect… but on the other hand, this is a T-rated sex/comedy, so one can hardly say the author didn’t warn you what you were about to read.  More than that this is very much a "just go with it" comedy, one that isn’t afraid to leap boldly into its ridiculousness.  And there is an undeniable pleasure in watching everything slowly make its way towards its inevitable closed time loop, especially since the story manages to retain a surprise or two despite that.

So yes, if you don’t care for sexual and alcohol-based humor, this probably isn't one you need to check out.  But if you enjoy silly stories that pack a lot of stuff into a small wordcount, then give this a shot.


Just how is Twilight able to be such a positive pony all the time? When Starlight decides to seek the answer to this question, she’s horrified at what she finds.


One great thing Starlight Glimmer offered as an antagonist was the chance for Twilight to go up against a foe that wholeheartedly believes what they are doing to be helpful. SilverStar7 takes full advantage of this characterization of Starlight, but places her mid-redemption.

This story already does a great job independently discussing how one deals with negative emotions and what constitutes a right or wrong way to deal with them, enough to where I could see a philosophy class picking this apart for hours. However, the way this contributes to Starlight’s character arc, and how it brings progress to her redemption is so subtly brilliant.

The beauty of this story is that it manages to close the door on Starlight’s journey, while still leaving the thought experiment the story constructs intact and ambiguous. I’m genuinely curious to see what you all think of this story, so give this one a read and come back here and comment your thoughts.

So, here at Seattle’s Angels, we mostly like to stick to the positives.  We talk about the things we like, and the things we like, and the reasons you should read something.  But just this once, I’d like to take a moment to discuss some negatives.

Because I’m sorry, but I’m still not over how the show mishandled Starlight Glimmer’s redemption.  They gave us this wonderful villain, let her stew and build up for a whole season, and then just… just did a rainbows and apologies montage and told us she was on Team Good Guy now.  And even though she kept doing obviously evil things (you know, mind control, temporary enslavement… we’re not talking “backsliding” so much as “still being legitimately evil,” here), the show consistently brushed it off as harmless shenanigans.  It even retroactively turned her wonderful pre-redemption stuff into a joke; “Hey, remember that time you brutally psychologically abused an entire town into absolute submission, and fully intended to do the same to an entire nation?” the girls now say, laughing, as Starlight blushes, only mildly abashed.  It’s just… it was such a waste of a premise, and I’m never going to be okay with it, and by God almighty the way a children’s show handled one of its villains reforming over four years ago is the hill I will die on, do you hear me!?

...Which is what made this story so refreshing!  

Leave aside for a moment the in-story reason for, and exploration of, why the girls were so quick to forgive Glimmer.  It’s just nice that the fic recognizes that that redemption wasn’t (yet) earned, and tackles it head-on. Glimmer’s smart, after all; surely she can see that things are going a little too easily, without requiring any meaningful change on her part?  Well, SilverStar7 uses that disconnect as the basis for a fascinating little dive into what our emotions make us, and how we handle both them, and ourselves. I don’t want to spoil too much, but there’s a fascinating thought experiment at the center of this story.

So even if, like me, this story isn’t about a character you’re particularly enamored of, don’t be afraid to give it a try.  And if you like a bit of dark psychology with your fanfiction, then don’t give this a miss.


“...Aaaaaaand there we go.” FanficReader920 made the last couple touches on his last review. “Man, I can’t believe I’m gonna be on a Seattle’s Angels post. And with Chris no less.”

The veteran reviewer gave a small chuckle. “Don’t worry, you’ll stop being impressed by us soon enough.”

The rookie reviewer turned to the veteran. “I never looked up to you and the other reviewers because of you as people, no offense.”

“None taken.”

“I looked up to reviewers like you because of what you got to do,” Fanfic explained. “You guys got to put your thoughts out into the world so that others might just get the exact same positive feelings from a story that you did. I just wanted to join in on the fun. I was recommending stories for so long, just hoping I could try and feel like I was one of you guys. Now, I’m here. I want to make sure I don’t let this opportunity go to waste!”

Chris flashed a small smile. Back in the old days, when Ezn was just starting to think about putting together a writing guide and the Pony Fiction Vault hadn’t been created, retired, had its mission taken up by the Royal Canterlot Library, and then had that brief hiatus, he’d been left on his own to develop a reviewing voice. 

Fanfic had potential, and seemingly the drive as well. Now, he’ll be able to have something that he didn’t have: someone that won’t let him wallow in the wilderness of cringe. 

“He’s gonna fit right in.”

‘What was that?” 

“Nothing.” 


Feel free to visit our group for more information and events, and to offer some recommendations for future rounds. See you all next time!

Report Wanderer D · 1,290 views ·
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Comments ( 11 )

Well, this Cleansed of Darkness thing sounds really interesting. The last sentence of the brief description really sells it for me.


Anyway, hello to all of you new reviewers! Hope you have a great time doing whatever it is you'll do! :yay:

5184613
Yeah, that line got me interested too.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

Those first two are real good choices! :O

So, is this a good fanfic? I would say not. But don’t let that stop you from reading it, because what it is is a poignant, powerful story.

I’ve heard this kind of thing said about so many of my fics that I’m gonna go ahead and claim it as a personal brand.

Thanks for the review and the positive words, y’all!

5184630
Thanks, Present! Zealots is a story that just hits you where it hurts.

5184613
5184618

Be sure to come back and comment your thoughts about Cleansed, I really would like to see what y'all think of it.

Thanks so much for the sweet reviews. I’m so glad you all liked my story. :heart:

Wow. How did you think of all of this-

Thank you for taking the time to read and review Cleansed of Darkness. I'm sorry that the nature of the story didn't allow you to go into more depth in your reviews without spoilers, but I'm really glad you were both able to get something out of it.

FanficReader920, I'm very happy to see someone commenting on the philosophical aspects of the story. It's a bit esoteric, but I find the nature of consciousness and identity to be fascinating. My readings and ponderings on the subject inspired much of this story. I'm flattered that you think it's worthy of classroom discussion, as that was my ultimate dream for this story: that it would get the reader thinking.

Chris, I hear you loud and clear on Starlight's (lack of) redemption arc. That was the catalyst for the thing that later became this story. It just didn't make sense to me why Starlight wasn't shown struggling with her past demons. I mean, I wasn't expecting Last Airbender Zuko levels of redemption arc, but I think we deserved something much better than we got. I'm pleased that I could offer you something more on the subject.

Thank you both again for the kind words!

5185067
It was no trouble Silver. I had read Cleansed a long while back (I want to say around the time it first released, but I'm not sure), but it wasn't until I took a philosophy class this past semester in college where I could put a finger on why I liked it so much. Additionally, after I saw the philosophical aims the story had, I was better able to distinguish it from the character arc that Starlight went through.

I honestly appreciated it A LOT more my second go-round, reviewing it for this, then I did the first time. The fact you were able to keep the thought experiment intact (with no obvious answer) while still keeping Starlight's character arc closed-ended is really well done. 9I said it in the review, but I feel like it's worth mentioning again.)

The reason why I didn't reveal any spoilers was because I think a big part of the story's enjoyability comes from the reader experiencing the story with Starlight, which would be ruined if I revealed too much. (If you notice in this comment section, me leaving it a mystery actually brought in a couple of readers, so I think it worked.) However, if you want to know my thoughts WITH spoilers, then feel free to DM me. I'm always up for a conversation.

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