Present Perfect vs. Fallout Equestria: Duck and Cover! · 11:20pm Aug 15th, 2019
Hey, you! Yes, you!
Do you think Fallout: Equestria is too grimdark and serious to be any fun?
Well, so did hahatimeforponies, and that's why he wrote Fallout Equestria: Duck and Cover!
Imma review it now!
Talking about Duck and Cover is going to be weird, because I keep comparing it to a story of mine that I have yet to write. <.< Like D&C, that story is going to be a Fallout: Equestria comedy. Unlike D&C, however, I just wanted to thumb my nose at the story, taking ridiculous characters and throwing them into the setting to wreak havoc. hahatimeforponies, who is obviously a scholar and a gentleman, wanted satire. And satire is way more literarily legitimate than whatever crap I pull off.
To talk about why, I must first introduced our characters.
Our "hero" — I use the term very loosely — is Atom Smasher, a nineteen-year-old pegasus from Stable 512, an unfinished remnant from before the bombs fell, nestled in the muddy hills of Mareseyside, Braytain. (Equestria, for reference, is pony America in this story.) Atom is a very shiftless sort of pony who amuses herself with cherry bombs until the day she decides 'fuck this' and leaves her Stable. Also she's bright orange and thus incapable of stealth. Also she carries a Nerf gun.
Yaknow, it's really weird what got ponified in this story and what didn't.
Atom Smasher, as we quickly find out, is a functional psychopath. Her special talent is "blowing shit up", and once she's ensconced in the Wasteland, she takes to the constant warfare with gusto. A couple caravanners give her some explosive darts that fit her gun (because of course the gun has to be functional), and she proceeds to murder everything she possibly can, just for "fun".
The other characters are less important, but they are, in order of meeting: Full House, a noble, badass Equestrian cowboy who follows Atom around trying to fulfill a life debt; Shooting Stars, the straightmare of the party, a Steel Rangers Scribe who tries really hard to be a pacifist; Snowy, a "coal puppy" Diamond Dog who they befriend in a slaver camp; and Xena, a pre-war anti-zebra propaganda poster pasted to a road sign. Atom brings her along to "improve diversity in the party". I hope you can see what we're playing with here.
And if you do, well, you're one of the few. Where I started to realize just what was going on in Duck and Cover was in reading the comments. My first impression of Atom was, okay, she's obviously a play on the snarky, overpowered protagonist, but she's a bit much. But watching commenters praising her for killing all her problems and giving no fucks made me realize, that's the point. And the point was flying over their heads.
The thing about satire, really true, good satire, is that you're holding up the foibles that befall mankind and saying, "Isn't this just the worst?" But you do it in such a way that many who suffer the same foible will think you're doing precisely the opposite. You get them to reveal their true selves under the gaze of your work, and they have no idea they're being played.
Because it's not like Atom's psychopathy goes unnoticed, especially toward the end of the story. Stars in particular is a constant goad. But she's often discounted because she's "whiny", not to mention because the chapter after she's introduced, she goes on a murderous tear through a slaver camp, killing slaver and slave alike in retribution for the death of her brother. One slip-up, one mistake, and suddenly her opinion doesn't matter. But it doesn't mean she's wrong.
And that's not to say this story isn't funny on other levels, because it definitely is. If you like that kind of thing, Atom is full of pop culture quotes, sometimes lifting entire movie lines wholesale. She's very aware that she's telling a story, in much the same way Littlepip's tale is a recounted journal of her adventure, and constantly comments on her own writing without breaking the fourth wall per se. There are plenty of running gags (I particularly enjoyed watching her constantly drop all her shit and stop to pick it up again), not to mention background characters who bring a little levity into the dark, dank world of the Wasteland. You don't have to enjoy watching ponies get killed in messy ways to enjoy this story, is my point.
Of course, the best joke comes at the end, when it's all said and done, and the author reveals just how he parodied the original. I have to say, I did not catch all of that in the moment, but it all made sense, and it is brilliant.
Like, the big character death: that was a hell of a chapter. I really liked that character! But it didn't matter in the long run. Sure, it got Atom to finally give a damn about something, but all she did was fly into a homicidal rage. The only difference from any other day is the rage part. If she hadn't killed that pony, or that group of ponies, she'd have killed someone else eventually. It's all for naught, and I love it.
One other major positive I want to point out is the pacing. This is the shortest chaptered FoE story I know of. Even combined with its sequel (as it comes printed), they're not even half a Fallout: Equestria long. It's refreshing. And this comes from Atom Smasher's distinct aversion to noting down every turn of her journey. Because half the time, they're just trotting through the Wasteland, and everything looks grey and brown and awful, and nothing important happens, even if they end up fighting a random encounter of Raiders. And she says so. And that's really okay.
And yeah, sometimes the reference jokes get a bit thick. And sometimes Atom's a little too on the nose with pointing out how various things don't make a bit of goddamned sense, where the criticism gets a little too pointed. Then again, you've got stuff like her constantly being surprised by the level up dialogue at the end of chapters and trying to talk over it. There's the comedically villainous ineptitude of the Enclave. There's the fact that the local DJ's name is Tribute.
And there's the true hero of the story: Tramway. :D
Fact is, there's very little I can say could have been done better here. I am of course completely jealous that hahatimeforponies beat me to a number of jokes, but I don't even think I had started reading FoE by the time this story was being published. At this point in time, I am very much looking forward to the sequel, which I will be getting to after a few other things.
So yeah. If you've read enough Fallout: Equestria to be familiar with its setting, whether you've liked it or hated it — and especially if you hated it — give Duck and Cover a try. I think you'll be pleasantly surprised.
4/5
The Fallout: Equestria satire we deserve.
Gee, that feels like a really short review. c.c But I don't think there's anything else that needed to be said, so!
Wow. I had heard of this story, but having sworn a mighty oath to never darken the Pony Wastelands with my eyeball tracks again, I passed it by.
Maybe if I install some lightning rods? I mean, the single thing you mentioned here that tempted me to risk the wrath of the gods more than anything else was Xena. That kind of brilliance deserves to be witnessed.
It's been so long now that I can't really remember why, but apparently I only made it through nine chapters--I think it was that I felt like I got the overall joke and going through the rest ended up feeling repetitive.
Anyway, definite points in favor include 1) Atom smasher's excellent design and 2) the Nerf thing. The latter reminded me of Puppysmiles and her rock, but a better tonal fit because it was attached to a comedy psychopath rather than an empathy target. Wish I'd got to Xena--that sounds pretty funny.
5106832
There's definitely weird shit past the halfway point, like the two chapters of "heroes get sucked into Elder Scrolls" that explicitly went nowhere. It's a strong parody of FoE's penchant for pointless side quests, but it's also two chapters of complete bunk. XD
5106853
Yeah, that sounds like something I'd have a rough time with. Maybe it's just because I'm feeling surly from reading something else which ended up with a similar issue, but I think this might be the deal: I'm good at reading stuff where I'm invested in something--the characters, plot, or world, generally. And then I can put up with a whole lot--repetitive plot elements or drama or comedy, poor pacing, some degree of character or logic slip ups or what have you (I mean, there are limits on those, but I can handle a bit), even directing focus away from the part I'm invested in for a while. But if there's not that something which has hooked me, it's easy to feel like my time is being wasted. And from what I recall it didn't feel like the idea here was for you to really get invested in Atom Smasher, and (in the first nine chapters anyway) there wasn't much of a plot I remember, so it really needed constant fresh comedy/adventure beats landing right to carry it, and it just wasn't doing it for me.
Really funny story. I recommend it.
The sequel is... different. It's a "real" story instead of a parody. I don't remember too well, but it felt like the two stories didn't belong in the same universe. Maybe I'm wrong. I know that at least a couple of things went over my head, since at that time I had just started reading in English and I didn't understand some references and jokes. The sequel is great, I enjoyed it and recommend it, regardless. I'll be looking forwards to your thoughts on it.
I absolutely loved FOE, especially because of the wonderful reference-mashup of FO 1, 2 and 3 and the 'fallouty' feel the author managed to create. Satirizing FO 1 and 2 is difficult, because they satirize themselves all the time - but FO3 takes itself too seriously and is so full of stupid crap that parts based on that should definitely should work.
Anyway, I'll give it a look. Sounds good.
I really enjoyed the story, and loved the fact it was set in Not-UK, as it meant a ton of opportunities to poke fun at stuff that no other FOE stories got to touch away from the Americana. I particularly loved the random anecdotes and musings about things like the Raider ‘Economy’ and how unsustainable it would be if it was anything like the games/FOE as well as the fast pace of the story overall, a nice change from the 5-600,000 word FOE epics that most of the other stories turn into at some point in their writing.
I do agree with Ret though, the original I see as a pure FOE comedy/parody with consistent humour and some absurd moments, often lampshaded, which was a bit jarring compared to it’s sequel which is a much more story-focused efffort with sprinkles of humour but not running at such a breakneck pace. I still enjoy both, just preferred the original.
Satire aside, Atom Smasher is the embodiment of that one playthrough when you've stopped giving a damn about the story and just want to play a murder-hobo.
Do temper your expectations for the sequel, though. I find it just as hilarious, but unless I've misremembered it or badly misread its subtext, it's not quite a satire anymore.
Overall, I do prefer it over its predecessor because it tells a sincere story beyond the initial goal of poking fun at the original FO:E.
5107022
Yeah, no, the sequel I'm not expecting satire for. I'm honestly all a-quiver.