FiMFiction Tutorials 3: Staying in Character · 3:14pm Aug 15th, 2019
How would you react if, in the Avengers, Captain America agreed to bomb a building full of innocent people just to get a few bad guys? How would you feel if Twilight started treating her friends like dirt for no reason? How would you feel if Superman was fighting Zod, not caring about the collateral damage and causing countless deaths?
Obviously, most of you wouldn’t like it, because it goes against the character’s personality. They’re acting out of character, and no one likes seeing that from their favorite characters.
Keeping everyone in character can be a very difficult task. For OCs, it can be difficult, even though this is a character you made from the ground up. For canon characters, though, it’s so much harder. We all know how Twilight Sparkle is, so any deviation from her character will be immediately recognized.
One of the most common reasons so many people write a character out of character is because they tend to assign them roles, such as ‘the nerd’ or ‘the jock’. The problem with this, is that thinking of them like this, you start asking yourself “what would a jock do” instead of “what would this character do.”
A character is more than just one or two traits. I consider seven ‘personalities’ when writing for a character. Though there are more, these tend to be the most prominent. Keep in mind this is my personal list and may not work for everyone:
Social/Public; how they tend to act in a public social setting.
Social/Private; How they tend to act among only friends and/or family.
Social/intimate; How they tend to act around very close individuals like a lover or childhood friend.
Solitary; How they tend to act when alone.
Business; How they tend to act when at work or fulfilling an obligation of some kind.
Conflict; How they tend to approach obstacles, setbacks, hostility, etc.
Failure; How they tend to handle loss, failure, or unfortunate circumstances.
People often act differently in each of these settings. However, each of these are just the most basic of traits, as any number of things could alter how they behave, such as the presence of a specific character.
Another thing to keep in mind is speech patterns. Not everyone speaks the same. I’ve seen many people that seem to think as long as they have Rarity say ‘darling’ and Fluttershy apologize for everything it’s good enough. This is not the case.
Everyone has their own way of speaking and acting, and that can often change depending on the situation. For example, Twilight tends to ramble when excited and speak with very proper english, while Rainbow speaks in a much more casual manner, using slang more liberally.
Now, let’s look at some tips and common pitfalls of several canon characters. Please note, these are intended for stories in which one is trying to maintain the personalities and mannerisms of the show. Parodies and ‘loose’ works are exempt from these, though they should still stay within the character you create for them.
Twilight Sparkle
Twilight is intelligent, but, like many intelligent people (myself included, admittedly), she sometimes suffers in the common sense department. She’s also socially eager, but awkward.
Though she’s not arrogant like Trixy or even Rainbow, she does have a bit of an ego. She either has the answers or can find them, and any time she doesn’t, she starts breaking down. This has gotten better as time goes on, but it’s still there.
Rainbow Dash
A lot of people misread Rainbow quite drastically. When they look at her as a character, they see the mask of bravado she wears. In truth, while Rainbow is talented and knows it, she’s the most insecure of the Mane 6.
She wants to be more feminine, but she also wants to maintain her reputation of being ‘awesome’. Like so many people in the real world, she thinks she can’t be both. Her greatest fear is failure, especially failing those she cares for.
She is boastful, but she isn’t really arrogant. There’s a difference. She’s good, and she knows it, but she also recognizes the strength of others and knows the others are better than her in their respective fields. Her greatest strength is motivating others and helping them see how great they can be.
Another common misconception about Rainbow is that she’s untrusting (thanks to the ‘spy’ line in the pilot). She’s not untrusting, but she is protective, especially of Fluttershy. Because of this, she may be wary of suspicious individuals, but not untrusting unless they give her a reason.
Rarity
What I love about Rarity is that she shows that a character can be a traditionally feminine character and still be a strong, progressive woman. It’s a common misconception that in order for a female character to be strong, she can’t be ‘girly’. Rarity throws this idea to the wind and shows strength has nothing to do with girliness.
There are two important things to remember about Rarity that a lot of people forget. The first is how she speaks. She speaks with very proper English. She doesn’t use slang. The other is that she will gladly wade through the most disgusting of filth to help those she cares for. She may hate dirt but she’s not afraid of it.
She can also be prone to single mindedness. While that can be a strength in some situations, she has difficulty splitting her attention. She’s also not the best when it comes to dealing with stress.
Pinkie Pie
Pinkie is, by far, the most likely to be written out of character, mostly because people can’t seem to understand her. They get Pinkie’s energy and scatterbrainedness down, but that’s all too often where her personality ends in fan fics.
One of the most important things to keep in mind about Pinkie as that she suffers from depression. All that smiling and laughing, while genuine, is a safety mechanism she developed to counter her depression. If she’s always happy, and always making others happy, her depression can’t get a foothold. That’s why anything that hurts her, hurts her so bad.
Another important trait of Pinkie’s is that she’s the most observant and has an outstanding memory. In truth, Pinkie may even be smarter than Twilight, but she’s too busy enjoying life to show it off or even use it. Regardless, she’s the one that would notice something the others didn’t, or know some obscure fact.
However, she doesn’t realize how smart she is. She thinks she’s average, so she expects everyone else to know as much as her. That’s why she doesn’t always point stuff out, she thinks they already notice it.
Also, Pinkie’s fourth wall breaking is greatly overused. She doesn’t do that often in the show, and she shouldn’t in fanfics.
Fluttershy
Like Pinkie, Fluttershy is often times written with one character trait, though hers is fear.
The most important thing to remember is that shyness and fear are not the same thing. While Fluttershy does have plenty of fears, her shyness is a much more dominant trait.
Shyness isn’t fear, as much as uncertainty (a simplification, I know). One who is shy is uncertain what to say or how to act, so they simply don’t. When they do speak, it, too, is with uncertainty. They are unsure if what they’re saying would upset someone, and often apologize in an attempt to placate any anger preemptively.
Applejack
Applejack is the one that people tend to get pretty well. The only thing people tend to mess up with her is using y’all in singular. “Y’all” is a conjunction of “you all”. Also, don’t overwrite the accent. It gets difficult to read. Stick with ‘Mah’, ‘Ah’, and ‘-in’’ for ‘my’, ‘I’, and ‘-ing’, respectively. That’s more than enough to get the accent across.
Luna
Luna is all too often portrayed in a similar way as she was at the beginning of Luna Eclipsed. While that was funny, by the end of the very episode that introduced it, Luna was no longer speaking archaically, using the royal ‘we’, or using the ‘Royal Canterlot Voice’.
Other than that, she is a very old fasioned pony and speaks in a very text-book manner. She's very literal and direct, though not to the extent of Sugarcoat.
Spike
Oh, poor, poor Spike. He really is the butt of the joke far too much. Spike is often portrayed as a doormat, letting ponies walk all over him. He's shown to be a bumbling, selfish, horny idiot.
In truth, he's an intelligent, if sometimes immature, boy. He wears his heart on his sleeve and is, in a way, Twilight's greatest voice of reason and emotional support. More than any other, Spike keeps Twilight grounded.
Of course, he's also a pre-teen/teenage boy and sometimes does lets his ego, greed, or desires override his logic. However, this really isn't very common.
Discord
This is one that sometimes irritates me. I’ve seen so many fics portray Discord as so wildly out of character that it makes me wonder if some of them even know who he is.
So many fics, especially right after his reformation, centered around him only pretending to be reformed, but it was all part of his master plan.
Yeah...
Spirit of chaos...
Master plan...
Do I need to point out the problem with this?
Two very important things to always, always, always keep in mind. First, Discord doesn’t ‘plan’. Plans are the opposite of chaos. Second, he was never truly evil. Yes, he was a jerk, but he was only out to amuse himself. He didn’t do anything just to cause pain and suffering, and certainly never killed anyone.
One story in particular had Discord not only plot a millennia long plot for revenge but also torturing ponies to death and using pointlessly cruel methods to kill random ponies that just happened to be there. This is not Discord. This is an OC wearing Discord’s name and title.
OCs and Background Ponies
OCs and background ponies with no dialogue, history, or established personalities have challenges of their own. First, you have to establish their character. This is what most people have trouble with, as they often either exposit their personality, or neglect it all together.
Don’t introduce your character by telling us what their personality is, let us see their personality for ourselves. If your character is a bubbly, happy-go-lucky mare, show her skipping through town, greeting ponies, etc.
I will note that OOC is fine if, and only if a good explaination shows up in story.
The oionly example that jumps to mind which is done well is Zecora in "The rise of Darth Vulcan". How good or bad the story might be in other aspects, the explanation and resulting OOC behavior, namely an entirely different speech style, was explained, somewhat explored, and as a result is completely reasonable afterwards.
OOC behavior is fine if you explain it properly.
Secondly, OOC from the show isn't the only thing. OOC from fanfic behavior also counts. When enough people use something, like Pinkie's forth wall breaking, it becomes part of her expected character. While lack of it might not be OOC, neither is it's addition. It is considered a normal, if optional part of her character. The show is not the only source of characterization traits.
All that said, I agree that characterization is a lot more complex than most writers treat it, and it causes problematic OOC behavior that reduces such stories.
Speaking as somebody from the american south, I feel I have to correct you on y'all. Generally, when it's used, the 'all' aspect does not refer to the plurality of the subject but is used as emphasis to the statement.
"Y'all done?" doesn't mean "Are every single one of you finished," but "Are you quite finished?" "Y'all ready?" means something along the lines of 'When we get started we ain't stopping, so if you have ANY concerns, say so now." Y'all can be pluralized, as y'all're, but only if you're emphasizing to a group. There are some expressions that straddle the line; "Howdy y'all!" tends to be addressed to a group, but usually it's a mix of emphasized greeting to a pluralized group, and not simply raw acknowledgment of the number.
"If you all came here for a story, then y'all're in for a treat! Are y'all ready for this?"
5106543
I hate to disagree, but I'm a southerner, too, from a very redneck family in the blue ridge mountains. We never use y'all in the singular, nor does anyone I know. Also, 'y'all're' is short for 'you all are'.
5106559
The thing about the south is that it has a lot of dialects. I've heard 'y'all' as emphasis a lot more often than 'y'all' as pluralization. I recognize the second exists, but it sounds off to me.
5106572
What part are you from? I'm an Appalachian man, myself.
5106574
The Texas/Oklahoma area, actually.
5106606
Ah, that might explain it. Y'all do things your own way.
See what I did there?
I'd define it as Street Smart versus Book Smart. You learn to be observant/confident of your surroundings else you get run over or mugged (not necessarily in that order). Of course, Equestrias cities are a lot less dangerous than a typical human city.
Don't forget ya'll -> you will.
Really though, Applejack usually says "you" and "I". She does say stuff like "everythang", however, which I'm not sure I've ever seen a fanfiction author write.
5106543
I hear y'all used both as "all of you" and "are you completely" around here in Oklahoma. "Y'all done?" could use both meanings at once, amusingly.
5107161
Thank you! So many people somehow seem to miss this. Yes, before he was 'reformed' (considering who we're talking about it's more like he was given a stern talking to and now behaves himself) he had a laugh that sounds quite malevolent, but really his thoughts when he had that kind of laugh were likely more akin to a child's plan to play rough with their favorite toys than of any kind of truly malevolent intent. By that I mean, he might torment the ponies, but he had no intention of breaking them. After all, if he broke his toys, what would he entertain himself with? Changing the world is boring if none of the dreadfully harmonic ponies are able to react.
I think some people fail to consider how important Discord's one line 'Pinkie's is my personal favorite, Laughter' is to understanding his character. Let's be honest; Discord is an age old immortal who's so powerful that there was never anything that created conditions that forced him to 'grow up'. He still a child at heart, and he wants to have fun. I think he always wanted to have friends, he just never realized that the kind of connection he so desired with another, was what made a friend.
The way he mocked friendship in his initial appearance makes me think that perhaps he's had 'friends' before, but only ever of the fair weather variety. He never had a true friend, so when he heard Twilight and her friends preaching of the strength and value of friendship, it genuinely made him feel sick because he thought she was preaching to the heavens about something that, in his experience, could never last or be worth it.
...Wow, that was a tangent that came out of nowhere. Anyway, thanks for sharing the 'Discord was never evil' truth.
5112012
Yeah, it's bothered me even before his reformation how people would portray him as some evil mastermind. Glad I'm not the only one.
I definitely needed a bit more info about Dash, since she’s my favorite
I noticed you didn't mention Celestia. Maybe it's confirmation bias but I've noticed her to be one of the characters most often written OOC. Do you have any advise regarding her?
5197285
She didn't have very much character when I wrote this. She was more of a plot device than a character at the time.
Now, my advice would be to keep in mind that she is the ruler of a nation. She would, ultimately, put the good of the nation ahead of the good of the individual. That said, she would never throw someone away just for 'the greater good'.
Also, just because she's old doesn't mean she knows exactly what happened with every major historical event. Not only would she not have been present when it happened, but even those she was present for, well, a thousand years is a long time to forget things.