Story Reviews » SA: Round 153 · 10:55pm Jun 29th, 2019
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Intern shot Heartshine a fretful look. “I’m telling you, just be ready.”
“Oh, I’m sure you’re exaggerating,” Heartshine repeated for the hundredth time, trotting happily down the long corridor far from the occupied parts of the SA compound. “How bad can he be?”
“Paul is the most Twilight Sparkle person on the planet,” he reminded her. “He gets dangerous when his schedule is threatened, and he’s always godawful busy. Frankly, I’m not sure he’s even human.”
Heartshine giggled at this. “Neither am I! Boom, instant friends.”
That was when the door to Paul’s spacious office opened ahead of them, the fog of a thousand cooling banks billowing about him, accentuated by the whirring of innumerable servers running at maximum processing speeds. The man’s presence made Intern freeze up, but Heartshine just kept going with that same eager grin. Paul turned to them just when she plopped down at his feet.
“Hi, I’m Heartshine! Wanna do reviews this week with me?”
Paul stared at her impassively. She stared back with big, bright eyes and the most innocent smile in the history of innocent smiles.
Then, abruptly, he picked her up. With a grin that cracked Intern’s sense of reality, he snuggled the pegasus. “You are adorable. I have been waiting for ages to get to work with you! Let’s get started.”
The door closed with a slam, leaving Intern drooling in the hallway as, slowly, his reality pieced itself back together.
ROUND ##
Sunset is feeling a bit uprooted facing the changes that come with graduation, so she and her friends set off on a road trip to make this last summer one to remember. And New Mexicolt seems the perfect place. Art, history, and natural beauty abound. But strange auroras haunt the skies, and there are reports of UFOs.
Really, the state motto is The Land of Enchantment. They should have seen this coming.
I am… entertained.
The Rainbooms decide to spend their last summer vacation on a trip to New Mexicolt, which apparently is known for its art, sprawling vistas, and supposed alien encounters. Nobody should be surprised that the latter ends up being the most important part.
Most of the story involves the Rainbooms going alien hunting, which is the last thing I’d have ever expected to see them doing, but here we are. Woven into this is a sublot involving Rarity crushing on Sunset, who is already dating Twilight, which makes things all kinds of awkward. But hey, romantic awkwardness is a big attractor for me, so I’m not complaining.
There are some hangups, such as how the story ends with startling swiftness and none of the wild events they inevitably encounter are ever properly explained. But then I realized at the end that all those weird events and encounters were never the point of the story: the love triangle is. And that just makes me all the happier.
I can still see a lot of people scratching their heads and wanting to know more, though.
Ah, New Mexico. I love New Mexico. It’s warm, it’s usually dry, it’s also weird as heck. La Tierra Encantada is translated on the license plates as ‘the land of enchantment’, which is super cute because the better translation is the land of ensorcellment. In the bewitching sort of sense!
Which is why I was super drawn to this story. Seeing the Rainbooms off on an adventure in a new place that I happen to love got me hooked before I even started reading. But realising that this had a Sunset x SwiggleTwiggles x Rarity made it all the more fascinating. I think us looking at missed connections we could have had when we’re in a relationship is something too few of us do. Which is fair; the feeling of ‘what if?’ gets pretty painful pretty fast. But being able to explore that as part of a journey is what makes life interesting, no?
That said, I was half expecting this story to end up like I did in New Mexico once: alone on a desert highway, when suddenly my car lost all power, and spookily a jet black C-130 flew about 30 feet over my head. The Rainboom’s encounter is all the weirder than that, but I think the best part of the story is that not much is explained, or resolved. We’re left wondering if the truth is truly out there, and what in the heck it may be!
She was stuck at the top of a broken Marris wheel when the stallion in the next gondola over started talking to her. With nothing else to do, she talked back. Once the wheel got fixed, they agreed to keep talking. Now, they wander around around the carnival, conversing about nothing in particular. Growing up, griffons, mortality, stars, rigged carnival games, alicornhood, whatever crosses their minds. It's a great way for them to get to know each other.
But they only have until the carnival closes. After that, they'll need to go their separate ways. Even if they don't want to.
This is a treat to behold. Styling itself as a romance, this story defies a lot of the tropes of the genre. It isn’t about two ponies becoming madly in love and swapping tongue juices, but about a pair of individuals who, over the course of a few short hours, learn about one another through idle chatter at a festival. Along the way, Rambling Writer gives us a ton of juicy tidbits without ever seeming to try.
Theories on alicorn immortality, revelations around rigged carnival games, and discussions of the stars work to subtly bring out a mass of worldbuilding and friendshipping that is refreshingly interesting and make up a delightful whole. And in the midst of it all are two ponies who, gradually, may be finding they want to learn so much more about one another. That’s what I enjoy about this one: it’s all about exploring, be it relationships, the world at large, or just the local festival. It is a little bittersweet at the end, but hey, that’s what sequels are for.
This deserves far more attention than it has. By all means, give it a go.
So… Paul dropped this story on me, and I don’t think he realised he was suggesting something that was exactly up my alley. While it’s set as the backdrop of a romance story, this story goes much deeper than that, and I love it for that. Paul mentions that it breaks the tropes of romance stories, but what it does do is show the power of focussed attention and conversation. There’s a psychological study that shows that one can elicit intimacy in complete strangers just by having honest, attentive conversations. The study did silly things like creating a list of questions, but I’ve always wondered if it wasn’t so much the questions themselves, as how much time and attention people give each other in the process.
The story also asked a lot of deep questions that, at points, made me get up from my computer and go stare out my back window for a while. In a very delicate and gentle way, this story pokes at questions I think everyone has about growing up but not feeling grown up. That sort of indescribable feeling that comes from being in your mid twenties, being told that you’re an adult now, and fearing that everyone is going to one day find out you’ve been totally making this up as you go.
The ending was bittersweet, and left me wanting more. So I uh, went and read the sequel, because I have no self control and love this sort of writing!
Some ponies want fame. Some ponies want money. Some ponies want not to be alone. It is a primal urge allowing them to withstand the distant fear of death. Wanting to be remembered, to leave something behind cannot be held against anypony.
However, there are those who just want a piece of cardboard to lie on so that the ground isn't so cold, a place shielded from wind and rain, and some leftovers to munch on from time to time. They prefer to not think of themselves as ponies so that not having any of the normal things doesn't hurt so much.
They are happy. No, they look happy.
I loved this piece, and its central character Greyscale. It’s not a light story, though, and I don’t just mean its length. Featuring themes of mental retardation public stigma, it includes such a range of troubling elements as attempted suicide, medical malpractice, and incest, to say nothing of mental disorders. I know, I know ,that makes this piece sound rough.
But then there’s Greyscale, our bumbling simpleton protagonist. Greyscale is always looking at the positive side of things, has faith in the good in others, and is all around the nicest, kindest pony you’ll ever meet. His path is winding, from military barracks to mental asylums to brothels, but everywhere he goes, he makes a change in ponies’ lives. It is, at times, sad to see him bumble through life thinking so low of himself, yet at the same time he has this charm to him that is easy to appreciate.
Greyscale sells this story for me, and the other actors are no slouches either. The story is at times hard-hitting, at others amusing, but always interesting. With every chapter, you learn a little more. With every terrible defeat (and they do sometimes get terrible), a new chance for victory and for our poor protagonist to shine through.
If Greyscale teaches us nothing else, it’s that Friendship is Magic.
Oh wow. This story gave me a lot of mixed feelings for a variety of reasons. Like Paul said, it’s not an easy read. The 100k length wasn’t the scary bit, but a lot of the scenes have moments that juxtapose heartwarming with horrifying. Nameless Narrator can be quite unflinching in his delivery of some of the darker parts of life, but is equally gentle at times with the genuine friendship Greyscale shows to the other characters in the story.
Set in the backdrop of a pony who isn’t the brightest, Nameless Narrator does well to also weave elements of mystery to the entire story. If you can get through the scenes that can be quite uncomfortable to read, this story is definitely worth a look.
When Dinky Doo finds something unexpected under her bed, she decides to find out what put it there.
Diabetes, people. This is a surefire way to get it.
Dinky is convinced she can see all the things the adults can’t, even if she hasn’t yet. Today, she decides to prove it to herself by doing a stakeout in her own home. As these things go, she finds what she’s looking for, and it is as cute as she is.
This is a lighthearted and joyful look at the world through the eyes of a child, with a dash of foalhood fantasy-made-reality sprinkled in. I loved it the first time I read it and I love it this time even more. Dive in a get ready for some Dinkybetes.
Oh goodness, this story is pure sugar, but also really fun! I think, as adults, we sometimes lose a bit of our knack for finding magic everywhere in the world. Dinky knows that, even in a world of magic, there’s a magic beyond magic that sometimes other ponies don’t know about.
Short and sweet, like Dinky, it’s nice to see a world unfettered by worries like Dragons and Changelings, and only about what caused something to happen. Dinky’s childlike logic at explaining why things in Equestria happen are darling, and seem pretty on point for how children will make up their own explanations for why the world works.
Plus juice boxes make an appearance here, and those are great.
I miss juice boxes. I should buy some.
Intern finally dared to poke his nose through the door to Paul’s office. He gaped at the sight of the man settled cross-legged on the floor, grooming Heartshine’s mane with a brush while they hummed Winter Wrap Up together. Both looked as content as newborn babies. All the servers and computers and cooling units were shut down for what may have been the first time since they’d been turned on.
Slowly, Intern inched his way into the room. “Uh, guys? The reviews?”
Eyes closed, Heartshine gestured with a wing to one of the desks, where the reviews sat in a stack so neat only Paul could have made it. “You can take them, if you want.” She let out a sound like a purr as Paul scratched behind her ears.
Intern relaxed, taking the reviews. He allowed himself a moment to admire the two of them together. “I gotta admit, Paul, I never thought you’d warm up to her so quickly, especially considering how these things eat into your schedule.”
Paul raised an eyebrow. “Are you serious? Intern, why are any of us even here?”
Intern considered many options, most of which were laughable at best. Finally, he shrugged. “To write reviews?”
“Ponies, Intern.” He booped Heartshine’s muzzle as if in demonstration, making her giggle. “Ponies.”
Feel free to visit our group for more information and events, and to offer some recommendations for future rounds. See you all next time!
What? Impossible!
I have seen many things while
slavingworking for the Angels. I shudder to think of anything beyond what I've witnessed this day.5081664 Most of the other stuff must be contained and kept away from the public eye
Ponies. Ponies, indeed!
And Heartshine is cutest pony!