Random Ramblings CCCLXVIII · 4:55pm May 21st, 2019
IN WHICH I SHOULD HAVE QUIT WHILE AHEAD
Waiting for the storms to make their way here from Oklahoma, attempting to find fitting music for my mood. Have this.
I never said I was sane. In fact I've often said the opposite. Please click the link below to read more.
Four months late, but I finally completed 2019's annual Mayor Mare story. I'm satisfied with it, but evidently no one else is.
I could have stopped at the fourth chapter. Maybe I should have. 8,500 words is a nice round number. But, no; I had to add a 500-word epilogue tying directly to a story only one person besides me read to completion.
I just don't care anymore. I feel like when William Shatner goes onstage to "sing" and flips off the audience. Still an egomaniac but mellowed with age, he knows exactly what he's doing and doesn't give a shit what people think. I wish I could be more like the better parts of him.
Over at my second home, Sakura Gakuin's subreddit, I got called out for allegedly "hyperbolizing everything" the girls say in diaries and interviews. I was rebutting a comment accusing me of fabrication and laid out my sources, including admitting there are things I don't know. I took particular umbrage at being called untrustworthy. While I apologized for going over the top, I'm not really sorry. Going over the top is what I do.
Aside from being an adulterous asshole, I sometimes wonder if in some ways I'm not too different from Donald Trump. I'm probably wrong -- his personality disorder is likely the polar opposite of mine. He's oblivious to his own faults, while I'm hypersensitive to mine. Everything is taken personally. However, we both fear rejection. Difference is he either dismisses it or fights it, while I either run away to avoid it or internalize it to the point I want to kill myself.
I apologize for talking openly about such heavy issues, but if I didn't vent here, where would I? Anyway, on to Author's Notes.
Like I said, I'm satisfied with what I came up with to conclude this year's Mayor Mare story. I had a difficult time writing the final chapter until I decided to stop caring. Writing about a parody of Donald Trump is psychologically draining, especially as I'm currently as disengaged from American politics as I can be. I didn't know where to go beyond the joke of Orangeglow's "border wall" being just signs planted every few yards that had "THE WALL" painted on them. That was planned way back in January but it took me awhile to get to it because I felt like I needed to do some character and world building first.
When in doubt, throw in Discord and let him write the story for you. It's not the first time I've written him, but it has been at least three years.
As soon as Discord appears, ATTTB is packed with references. I reference my first Discord story -- where Spike is in a Youtube Poop -- bringing that into continuity with my Mayorverse. Discord himself quotes from The Wizard Of Oz (with a nod to The Far Side's final comic) and The Muppet Movie.
Yes, Discord is taking orders from ex-Princess Antonovka, a.k.a. Granny Smith. So I've officially brought THAT story into continuity with the Mayor's universe (it always was, but now it's obvious). I promised I'd revisit Annie, and I was glad to be able to write a little update on what the Everfree Plaza looks like in the present day. Also, "yurt" is an inherently funny word, and also apt for that particular environment.
I was too hasty with the epilogue, but I just wanted to get everything done.
If MythrilMoth were still with us, he'd get onto me for once again writing about Trump and also rushing it. He'd be right, as usual. I had GS/Annie give him a small shout-out, as thanks for the harsh but useful advice he gave me over the years. He liked my Burrito stories, and it's going to be bittersweet finishing the last two, especially the end, knowing he'll never be able to read them.
The day he died, I'd coincidentally thought about him -- "I'm not too old for this. Moth is older than me and he's still doing horsewords." I had no idea his health had collapsed. I'm pretty sure I'm still not the oldest 'writer' on here, but…
I went out to lunch with my mother and her two closest friends yesterday for one's birthday. Good ol' comfort food. Both her friends are retired teachers and were talking about how former students had grown up and are now married with children. And here I am, nearly three and a half decades on this planet and still a bachelor with no desire for children. The "bachelor" part, as regular readers of my blogposts know, is not an affirmative choice on my part -- I got my ass dumped, and it's mostly my fault.
Maybe it's for the best that my mother lives with me now, as I can't exactly hurt myself while she's in the next room watching television. Still, she gets onto me for the nice days I stay in bed all day. Yes I know a change of scenery can temporarily ameliorate depressive symptoms. But maybe I want to wallow in my misery and then feel guilty because so many others are worse off than me so I really shouldn't complain (also know as the "Starving Kids In Africa" Fallacy).
But, like I said, I simply can't deal with adversity as well as others. Never have been able to.
The rains have come and I'm tired. I think I might sleep this afternoon.
I'm curious what's going to happen in the ongoing misadventures of Mayor Mare and Orangeglow. Well, if I'm still alive and able to barf words onto a screen, there will be a story about it next January 20th just like always. Can't say it'll be good, as the lack of readers for my last few stories suggests my ability may be deteriorating even if I feel the opposite. But I'll try my best probably.
Peace out.
I don't think you're like Trump at all. ;P Trump is also far less technically successful than you are. Unless he's telling the truth and losing money in order to evade taxes really is a sport and he couldn't have evaded them any other way.
And he has a history of lying.
You're also more progressive than he is as far as I know. And Trump is regressive so being even zero is better than him.
I'm 28 today, so you're definitely older than me. :P No worries though. :)
Tbh adversity's always been coming at me ever since I was first born, and in a way writing my first real, finished fanfic was the most struggle I've ever gone through in my life. Many, many times, nearly once per chapter, I considered just scrapping the whole thing because I kept getting into a rut about how I felt about it.