Story Reviews » SA Reviews: Round 145 · 6:46pm Feb 4th, 2019
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“Hey Cor,” Matthew began, “what would happen if we didn’t have an intro?”
Corejo thought for a moment. “I have no idea,” he said.
“Should we… should we try it?”
“Eh, why the hell not?” Corejo laughed.
ROUND 145
STORY 1
Tantabound, by Prane
Princess Luna has been freed from the influence of the Nightmare thanks to the Elements of Harmony, and she is now on her way to reintegrate with the society. However, when she realizes the weight of crimes she has committed as Nightmare Moon, she decides to create an equally nightmarish servant to ensure she will not fail her subjects ever again.
A Tantabus origin story? Yes please!
Luna fics are best fics. Plain and simple. Add the Tantabus to the mix, and you've got yourself an S-class honeypot.
All that the Tantabus episode gives us is that Luna created the Tantabus to remind herself of the horrors she had committed as Nightmare Moon, so that she'd never fall victim to the anger/jealousy she felt again. That's a monstrously vague statement ripe for any writer to come a-picking.
Prane takes an interesting in medias res stab at it and hits a solid mark right between the eyes, with a nice edge of archaic otherness in Luna's voice to keep things grounded. It gets a little high-minded toward the end for my taste (mind you, I have very strong headcanon in regards to the Tantabus and Luna in general), but this is a cool take on a Tantabus origin story.
Tantabus stories are not anything new to Fimfiction, but Prane’s take on it is certainly refreshing. Primarily because this story is about the creation of the Tantabus. The teaching of how to play with fears to torment another.
Prane took what was a parasitic, mindlessly evil idea and gave it life, gave it an intelligence worthy of its creator. It’s a little bit horrifying. But it’s horrifyingly good.
STORY 2
Inferno, by DrakeyC
Twilight won't settle for anything less than a perfect gift for her girlfriend.
They have very different ideas about what that entails.
A Sunlight fic? Sure, why not! It's not like I have a bias toward this ship (damn you, Novel.)
This delightful word-ball of fluff is brought to you by DrakeyC, who some of you might know for his piece Driver's Side from the Sunset Shipping contest last year. (Consider this a small bonus fic rec that you should all totally go check out.) It's not as heavy as our other entries this week, but that doesn't discount what it's got going for it.
Picking out a nice gift for someone special tends to be a difficult task. We've all been there. (The new holiday special is a great example of this, am I right?) It's only natural to accidentally blow things out of proportion, and the results can range anywhere from benign to catastrophic to downright embarrassing.
So maybe you need some catharsis after a particularly bad spree of gift shopping, or just want some of that good old Sunlight ship, give this a look-see. I can't say it was on the same level as Driver's Side, but fluffy is as fluffy does, and I'm sure you'll get a few warm fuzzies out of this one.
A very simple piece, but one I enjoyed nonetheless. Personally, I struggle a lot with gifts. I’m terrible at knowing what to give, even worse at showing excitement when I receive one. I also completely understand that simple feeling of wanting your significant other to be happy. So you know what? I totally feel for Twi.
Although I haven’t spent as much as she did on someone...
Fizzlepop Berrytwist was a little girl, and Twilight Sparkle's best friend. Her death left Twilight traumatized.
Fizzlepop Berrytwist was a little foal, with a bright future ahead of her. Her trauma gave birth to Tempest Shadow.
When someone is gone, it's the duty of the ones left behind to remember them, and to avenge them
Fizzlepop used to be Human!Twilight’s childhood bestie until she died in a tragic accident, and Tempest travels to the human world on an errand for Princess Twilight? This can only end in good things. And by good things, I usually mean bad. But in this case, it's actually good things.
What makes this story special is its presentation. Sure, flashbacks aren't anything new, but they're done right, and in lieu of the story's progression, makes for strong, concise storytelling.
It tends to get a little over the top goofy at points, which felt incongruent with the tone of the set-up, especially when it was Tempest being the silly one (except for the gunshop scene. That was proper, all-around gold). It became a sort of half silly, half serious story that favored jumping between the two rather than blending them together. Nonetheless, each individual part is valid and well-executed and never pulled me out of the story.
Fans of MagnetBolt's style will like this one, if they haven't already pounced on it. To those who might be on the fence, if you like quick, throw-away humor, this is definitely up your alley.
Friendship teaches forgiveness, to move past your anger and become a better person for it. But there’s something just so damn satisfying about revenge. So it comes as no surprise that a lot of stories use this to their advantage. Although I can say I haven’t ever seen an author use vengeance quite like this…
Because, honestly, this is a story of subversions and comedy. And it’s glorious. No, like, seriously. This had me constantly checking myself and chuckling as I sat back and just… enjoyed the ride. Because this story is worth that enjoyment. Also, Tempest = best friendship councilor.
When the Queen of the Changelings refuses to stick her neck out for a dying soldier, Moulder’s passionate love drives her beyond convention to seek a deal with the dreaded Sorceress, who seems more interested in a fairy tale from long ago.
I don't often read Changeling fics. I need to fix that.
So here we've got an interesting one. I didn't know what to make of it at first—I had actually wrongly mistaken the Changeling Queen as Chrysalis at first, which made for some rightful confusion—but once I got my bearings, this made for a nice treat. We here at Seattle's Angels love ourselves some good worldbuilding, and in that vein, this fic offered us a sneak peak at the dog-eat-dog nature of Changeling culture.
Aren't Changelings supposed to be mindless drones likened to punching bags and cannon fodder? There have been numerous stories that delve into the “Changelings are people too” idea, but I particularly like this story’s spin on it.
Told from the perspective of the current changeling queen, we follow the story of a changeling combat medic who seeks the aid of an evil Draconequus sorceress, to heal her brother-in-arms from a wound she can't cure herself. The narrative is steeped in the bias of the Queen's harsh and exacting rule, which I think adds that necessary spin any good culture exploration fic needs.
Did I mention there's an evil Draconequus sorceress who delights in the plights of mortals, just like our good friend Discord? Because there's an evil Draconequus sorceress who delights in the plights of mortals. That's good stuff.
This story can get a little hard to parse at points, but it definitely scores points in originality and intrigue. There's no small amount of “what's gonna happen next?” in this one.
I am a complete and utter sucker for Changeling culture worldbuilding, and by golly does this one satisfy that need. My only gripe? I couldn’t stay in this world long enough.
A story about the downfall of the Changeling Queen as a combat medic seeks the aid of a forbidden sorceress to heal an unhealable wound, she struggles to maintain the image the hive needs, and believes, her to be. Because if she doesn’t? The hive’s laws are clear, a new Queen will kill her and take over... just as she did once.
The rituals in this story are of particular interest to me, referencing the mysterious Catacombs and the runes they contain a number of times. The summoning of the sorceress requiring needlessly symbolic rituals and sacrifices. And the ceremony to pacify the being that will destroy Changeling life if not sated. All of these contain the perfect amount of explanation and mystery.
Deep within the bowels of the compound, at the top of the highest tower, and slightly phased out of this reality, was the Seattle’s Angels Penitentiary Center.
Matthew looked at Corejo. “So, that’s what happens when you have no intro. Good to know.”
Corejo glared at him for a minute. “I hate you.”
Feel free to visit our group for more information and events, and to offer some recommendations for future rounds. See you all next time!
THERE ISN'T AN INTRO. EVERYBODY RIOT.
...no intro?
*adjusts glasses, stares at penitentiary center*
Has the new pony recruit made the ferret go soft?
Good gentles, I find myself most pleased by the laconic nature of the morality play presented herein. Within a mere sub-centennial elements of locution, the delinquent rapscallions perpetrating a crime most heinous are proven pliable to the absolutive effect of prolonged incarceration. I proffer hearty applause, along with a request for further tales of moral clarity to offer sorely needed sage instruction to the turbid youth of today.
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Cor pulled a few strings to keep us out of the torture chamber... Angels that go in there, never come out shudder
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Good grief, horizon
Aha! I wondered why Diminished was suddenly getting so much attention. What a treat indeed.
Yeah, this was an oldie written for a worldbuilding contest back in 2013, when I wasn't quite as experienced as I was later on. That goes someway towards explaining its rough presentation. I'd also originally intended to expand upon the story, tying up one or two loose ends and developing more of the world's details.
Unfortunately, between the word limit (which I'd already surpassed) and my delays in getting back to it, I never fully recaptured the old passion. So I just wrapped it up there and then. It later tried its luck at Equestria Daily, for no greater reason than to see if it could pass.
I'd almost clean forgotten about it. Finding it here brings back some nostalgic memories. Wonderful to know you two enjoyed the reading, Corejo and Matthewl419, and thank you very much for making my day!
There was a SunLight fic with this premise, except it was Sunset instead of Fizzlepop.
Thank you for the feature and your words of praise!
If I remember correctly, I did not like Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep when it first aired, so this story must have been born with a “I must fix that!” mindset - not the most noble approach, and could have easily gone wrong, like turning into one writer’s rant. But when you’re writing a Princess Luna story, you take after her character. Instead of ranting angrily, you keep your suffering to yourself, typing words one by one while trying to make the world a better place (in my case, giving a greater sense to the episode I disliked).
I guess the episode was my personal Tantabus: a source of great “pain” which eventually allowed me to come up with something good. Per aspera, ad astra.
Once again thank you guys for reading and reviewing my story!
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i.gyazo.com/eadc4766d4e7ec02d0176f9b517df1df.png
Yeah. It's right there in the synopsis.
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That would explain that then.