BIG anniversary blog, FOUR stories in the feature box, and ALT REVEAL · 6:49pm Dec 12th, 2018
Yupp, that's right. Strap yourselves in, boys and girls, because I've got a lot to say and haven't planned this out in the slightest. For a few days over a year now, I've been filling this site with smut and it's been a fucking crazy time, so let's dive straight in! (There's a lot worth reading in my 69th blog.)
Over half a million words. Well, if you count some of the stuff I've still yet to publish, anyways.
Sixty-eight published stories, about fifteen of which have yet to be finished. (Some of those are commissions, so don't over-inflate how bad I am at updating!)
Over 1500 followers. More than I can hold in both hands.
The long and short of it? I've made a lot of shit happen this year. Friendships have been made. Epic projects have been started.
A few were even finished. (I know, I'm surprised too.)
Oh yeah, and at the time I'm writing this, I have four stories in the feature box. (I mean, for the second time this year.)
(Look mum I did it! WAIT NO MUM DON'T LOOK)
And of course, there's been a smattering of other projects and bunch of one-shots tiding me over until now—I've kept myself very busy.
So what put me in this position? What have been the highlights of 2018 for me, in regards to FimFiction? Good question, me. First off, one of the things I'm proudest of isn't a story metric, it isn't a staple of popularity, it's something I consider to be a lot more wholesome. It's the Discord server that me and B_25 made.
Now, I won't lie to you guys: that server I just linked, the one that me and B made? It isn't the most active server in the world. It has just over 200 members, and I'd say only a quarter of them, maybe a third are regularly active, but damn if I don't love it anyway, because it's my little slice of fun in this fandom, and the friends I've made there and in a couple of other places on Discord over the last year have been fucking amazing. I could talk about these people for pages, but I'll try and give you the abridged version. Maybe one day, I'll even tell some stories from the server, but that'd take too long right now!
There's B_25, of course. Me and him have gone back for over a year. We're constantly at each other's throats, but we don't mean a word of it. We just love to shitpost one another. He's one of my best friends, in this site and out of it, and earlier today, with the help of a blog I've since removed, we got him his fifth simultaneous feature.
(See, look! There it is. I'm a great friend 'n' stuff.)
But no, more about B. Me and this guy have written together and had countless conversations ranging from politics and philosophy to plenty of altogether less boring shit, such as his macro fixation or meme obsession. We're even planning to meet in January, provided we both have the time and can afford the plane fare. That's how much I platonically love this motherfucker. To me, there's no difference between him and an IRL friend. He's a total asshole, but he's also helped me deal with quite a bit of shit, and is always about to play games with me or watch films or whatever or just chat when I've had a shitty day.
I could talk about B for a lot longer, but let's move on.
Shortskirtsandexplosions. He's my other site bestie. We've known each other for like, eight or nine months now, and again, talk pretty much every day. (He's also good friends with B, so it's a great circle jerk thing or whatever.) The details of how we started talking are honestly a little hazy in my mind, but I'm pretty sure it was centred around me wanting to make a parody of one of his stories, titled 'Ponies are the Size of Cats and they Love to Fuck', which eventually became the Purrverse instead. (Still love that title.)
And... yeah! We just bonded. As some of you might know, Skirts isn't a super open guy (understatement of the fucking century), but then again, I'm an alt account. Neither was I for a long while. Maybe that's why we became good mates. Neither of us were particularly interested in the superficial bullshit, so instead we just discussed ideas and interests for the longest time, and found ourselves clicking in a lot of places. I'm not too interested in speculating on it, all I know is that he's a super cool guy and I've been really glad for his company over the last almost year. Me, him, and B play games together sometimes, it's a fucking blast. There's also another fucker that plays with us, I'll get to him in a bit.
I'm really shit at Overwatch, so you know. (I still might play with you though, DM me if you're on PS4.)
Distorted Flare. How could I not shout this fucker out? I don't really know how to describe Flare. On the surface, he's one of the most offensive and vitriolic bastards I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. (I mean seriously, look at his bio.)
But then, if you scratch beneath the surface, peel beneath the veneer?
...sorry, I've got nothing. He's still a complete cunt. But I love him to bits. He might be one of the funniest fuckers I know, and he's got a soft side, just don't tell him I said so. I play DnD with him and a few others (Comet Burst, Shipcord, Iorii, Whyte Knight, Chaotic Note, and a few others) and we all have a wonderful time. Half of it's comprised of me and Flare cracking cunts over the head with chairs and Flare trying to seduce monsters as we all flail behind him attempting to stop him, but it's honestly a little slice of heaven after a hard week of work.
Flare often complains that I don't join DnD sessions enough these days. Flare, if you read this, fuck you, I'll join when I'm ready. (I love you tho)
Iorii: You're a massive shitposter and very fucking moody in spite of it. We call you the grumpy old man for a reason, my guy. But you're still a funny fucker who's worked out the very specifics of comedic timing, and you giggle like a maniac when you're stoned. Writing those two collabs with you this year was a massive highlight of my time spent on this account, as they were just so fucking fun to work on. We'll be writing a sequel to Dick Suck Culture in 2019, you can bet!
JackRipper: You get a shout out. There are going to be some people who complain about not getting shouted out, I'm sure, but if I don't shout out the only guy I'm following, I know I'll get flak for it. Jack writes funny shit. He also writes some decent depressing shit. He's reasonably depressed because he has to act as moderator for the absolute worst of the site, so I'm not surprised he writes good depressing shit. But more than that, he's a boy, and just a ton of fun to be around. If you've got an annoying problem with the site that you know's gonna be a drag for a mod to deal with? Do me a favour, don't take it to Jack. That motherfucker has calculus to revise for, let him get some fucking sleep.
NotEnoughCoffee: This little bitch used to be a pretty serious guy, and then he disappeared from the site for like, six months after I hit him with a huge diss following a dick pic fight (another story for another blog), and then he came back obsessed with furry porn. Dude's a fucking legend, even if the obsession with porn even worse than mine can be a tad cringeworthy at times. I still wouldn't change him. He plays with me, B, and Skirts too, and we all have a great time shouting at each other.
To people who complain about not getting paragraphs here: fuck you with a side order of fries. My followers don't wanna read 30-40 of these. I'll do more of you in future, I love you all. (Also you should go follow all of those people except Coffee.)
Anyways, reason I'm mentioning some of these dudes is that not only have they helped to forge a massive part of my experience on the site, they're all regular members of Lands of the Banned, B and I's flagship server. Server wouldn't be nearly half as fun without these fags around, so I'm happy they all know and tolerate me.
Let's talk about stories. That's what I do, after all, right? Write stories for you guys, overwhelmingly of the smutty variety?
Yeah, I'm not sure how it started, either. I wasn't always An Intricate Disguise, after all, and I didn't always write smut.
In fact, spoiler, I hadn't written smut once in my life until making this account. Now don't get me wrong. I'd written before, quite a bit, but sexual words? I mean, unless sexting counts, I had zero experience with that shit. Didn't know what the fuck I was doing.
So I just decided to give it a fucking go anyways, try and learn as I went. And hey, maybe I did something right, because it seems like a lot of you fuckers liked it, and still do now. I worried about being able to inject variety into my stories, kept mental checklists of what words I was using too often and attempted to switch up the prose often. I tried to be innovative with ideas, and try silly and fun things, like Thunderlane fucking Twilight in public whilst he was invisible and she was giving a public speech, or a pornographic parody of The Very Hungry Caterpillar (which still needs finishing!).
I also did some more tried and tested stuff, of course. My most popular story on this account is Staying Put, a parody of a rip-off of a friend's idea that turned into a serious story somehow that I don't entirely understand. Whole thing with that was that after Iorii published his RGRE multi-chapter, Running x4, multiple recursive stories came out that were blatantly ripping off his story beats and premise, but not quite closely enough for the stories to be removed on plagiarism grounds. (I'm naming no names.)
So I talked to Iorii, who was understandably annoyed about it at the time. 'Hey, should I write a parody of those rip off stories?' He said 'yee' and I did, and it, uhh...
...kinda ended up becoming the most popular one. Whoops.
But it's fun to write, when time permits. A lot of people certainly enjoy it, and I've got big plans for Staying Put going forwards!
But let's backtrack a little.
When I joined this site, I was in a pretty bad state, mentally speaking. Agoraphobic, struggling to leave the house or do basic things, failing my year of university, and in a two and a half year relationship that was swiftly falling apart. Put plainly, things were feeling pretty horrible for me. Only solace I had was my writing at the time, when I felt so anxious and unlike myself that I couldn't even go out and see my friends, or bring myself to put my energy into a course I'd convinced myself I was doomed to fail.
So I poured my time into my writing, and was lucky enough to find a following. Then, after a couple of months, things swiftly began to improve in my life.
My anxiety issue is under much better control now, I'm glad to say. I take medication regularly, and it really helps. I've transferred university courses, and feel as if I'm experiencing a new start. I'm making progress in writing both on and off of FimFiction, and am hoping to expand my horizons in future. Social life is back on track, I'm a happier person in general, and things are just nicer. I can partially thank all of you for that.
I want to take a moment to mention one of my latest stories, Emotional Support Pony. Writing something like this is an idea I've flirted with for a long time, but it was only recently that I finally felt mentally prepared enough to share it with others from a point of experience and sufficient recovery. It sounds silly, it sounds sappy, but I wanted to be there for others who have gone through a tough time in some small way, to give them a brief reprieve from the hell each of us endures to some extent every day.
I didn't know how it would be received, but it dropped to so many wonderful comments. Even PM's, which I won't share in this blog for user privacy reasons, but honestly, seeing the way people reacted to this, the stories and experiences they shared with me? Honestly, I think I was close to crying at one point. While I can't link the PM's, here are a couple of my favourite comments:
Thank you for writing this. I've been depressed and dealing with social anxiety for most of my life, just kind of assuming my state of mind was normal and I was just a loser for not performing as well as anyone else. I didn't get diagnosed until I was 32, but CBT has helped me personally a lot.
I... Thank you this helps remind me that there are others out there similar to me. Thank you.
This did help so thank ya kindly you wonderful human!
Thank you. Thanks so much. Anxiety and depression are things that I and my family are very familiar with, and I'll be the first to say that both the counseling and the medications have helped tremendously. Also puppy cuddles. Puppy cuddles are the best.
The reason I give this a like and you a follow was this story alone. I loved every bit of this and it just made me happy reading this. Being there for someone in need is something we all need in life, and to help others when they are in a funk. Thank you for making this wonderful and beautiful story.
I love this. I'm absolutely bawling right now. It's nice to be reminded someone cares.
There are more, but I don't want to spoil it for those who haven't read yet, or overload this section with comments.
However, I have a reply to everyone who said and thought something along the lines of the above: Thank you. If it wasn't for all of you, I never would've had the courage to post something like this, to share it with so many. I love each and every one of you, and I'm so touched that I was able to help even one person in a small way, let alone multiple.
Thank you all so much.
Onto more fun things: this is my 69th blog post! Is anyone surprised? I may have deleted one unnecessary blog post from months ago just to ensure this was my 69th, but shush. You didn't read that. Stop knowing when I'm lying
That's only one more blog post than I have stories. Why do I have a lot of stories? Well, most of them are one-shots of the smutty variety, but I've got a fair few longer concepts as well. Some of them are only the beginnings of longer concepts, but that's my fault for being so fickle. It's how I operate, after all. I can't work on one project and only one project at a time without getting bored, so I always like to ensure I'm spreading myself out over multiple. Sometimes this can mean leaving something popular unupdated for a while, I realise, or sometimes life can pick up so much that I'm simply not able to get to that incomplete for a long time.
Long and short of it is that I plan to get everything finished sooner or later, and anyone who's been watching me for a while knows my work ethic doesn't often drop, but some of them are going to take time, especially if they remain unsponsored. I try to hit stories with updates as often as I can, but sometimes, I have to be working on commissions to pay for necessities, or I have to be working on university things to ensure I get my degree. There sometimes isn't a third option, as much as I'd love there to be.
But a lot of you are patient with me. Those that aren't, I can understand it, of course, and I'm sorry that I don't work in an entirely linear fashion, that each story I publish doesn't wind up finished within the month, that I'll update eight different stories in a given month and release two one-shots as opposed to just putting all those words into finishing one. After years of writing, I just don't think I can work that way. I might be able to if the incentive was really there, but I'd have to push myself. I'm grateful to everyone who bears with me, though.
As for the plans going forwards? I'm going to carry on with the incompletes, write as many commissions as I'm lucky enough to have thrown my way, and hope to start some new and large passion projects in 2019. If this year was productive, I want next year to be even more so. I want to release so much content you guys never leave my page.
Also, on a side note, excuse the avatar change. New year, new Spits!
I'm going to wrap this up here before it becomes overly long. I love you guys, I'll repeat, and I'm so happy to work for all of you, and for all the support you've given me over the last twelve months. I can only hope that you'll all join me for the next year!
Oh, yeah, I promised you all an alt reveal, didn't I? Well, you've come this far, I suppose it's only fair...
I'm also this guy, but I forgot the password a couple months back.
...
...what? You thought I was gonna reveal my main account? Heh. Maybe next year.
Stay smutty, guys!
An Intricate Disguise writes a variety of stories, both erotic and not, and endeavours to provide his fanbase with quality content on a consistent basis. He has a Discord server that he shares with B_25, which can be found here.
He also takes commissioned work. Whether it's a short story or a longer work that you're looking for, Disguise is often available and ready to make your fantasy become reality.
He also thinks that you're awesome. Yes, you.
It would have been funny if you had put
I saw an author use that at the back on those "About the Author" sections and it would have been really funny! Outside of that this was a really nice blog!
There are people who don't know your main?
Okay but Raised By Wolves update when?
And now we must have 69 stories.
So... no more updates?
4980128
I'll recover it soon, probably should've said that in the blog!
4980098
I guess all of the staff would know the alt's identity, right?
4980136
How do you think it got out to anyone else in the first place?
4980150
Some of us figured it out on our own. But your lack of mindlessly adding a sig to the bottom of your posts did throw a lot of us off for awhile.
You mean this whole time I've been following an alt?
... ... ...
FUCK
Don't mind me, I'm just gonna start trying to figure out which account is your main so I see what kind of awesome words you write on IT. No big deal4980161
What I'm saying is that for the vast majority that do know, there's a difference between them having figured it out on their own and [redacted] telling [redacted #2] who then posted the name publicly in whichever Discord server/s, but yee.
Maybe some did figure it out on their own, though. Maybe there are a few forensic linguists lurking on the site. Hell, maybe you did.
But I'll just quickly throw something in here now before someone who does know inevitably thinks it's a good idea to shout about it and name drop on my blog:
(Taken from the site rules page.)
Not aimed at you at all, Cryo. Just a blanket warning for whoever in future doesn't have the courtesy to at least talk around it.
Glad to have had you around for the last year. I'll put another TwiDash out at some point in the next month or two.
And we love you too, you glorious motherbucker, you.
Stay cool as ever.
I'm awesome? Yay!
Btw, an tips when writing what you write?
Edit: Awesome avaar upgrade!
Bro I've read your stories before but not known it was you, you are one of da best writers on this site.
pst- between you and me, you should so upload your main account at 12:00 on new years
4980210
Btw I really want to post stories here but I haven't got the time cause of school, and I have the worst case of writer's block, any tips?
Can't wait to see what else you come you with. I hope my idea was unique enough to warrant commissioning your talents.
Your new avatar is very pretty
Though I think the Spits in the blog post is probably prettier?
You’re very funny, you know that?
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Damn has it already been over a year?
4980161
Thanks for this, you just jogged my memory on who his main was. It was killing me because I knew I was told at one point but I'd completely blanked on it.
I actually kind of want to know your main. Not for stalking reasons or anything. More so that I can read the stories there. You don't really do a lot of sci fi or adventure or anything like that on this account and if you wrote something like that on your main, I would probably read the crap out of it.
It is currently 3:34 AM.
I fuckin knew it. Also, you can go suck a fart outta my ass.
Happy Anniversary! Thanks for the info. Interesting to know about "Staying Put"'s inspiration. I had to go read it and I found it an enjoyable read. Cheers to another year!
4980170
Lookin' forward to the Twidash.
Quietly awaits a story with best pony Spitfire.