Turnabout Storm Revamp Completed! Final Thoughts... · 6:48pm Dec 10th, 2018
Finished off the last two chapters this past weekend. Part 66 - Revelry, Race and Return had no major changes; just the usual cleanup plus a tweak or clarification here and there. For the most part I was already pretty happy with it, though I did make it a point to update one of the graphics:
Maya’s grin got wider as Phoenix just smiled and shook his head. “Not in a million years, ‘darling’,” the former mimed Rarity’s intonations surprisingly well before her smile abruptly dropped and her brow furrowed. “Uh… Nick?” she sounded puzzled as she pulled one envelope out of the ten days of accumulated correspondence. “There’s something odd for you here… something that was just overnighted from Switzerland via certified mail…”
“Switzerland?” he blinked.
“Yeah…” Maya stared at it. At his nod, she opened it and quickly scanned its contents, only to nearly drop them. “N-Nick…” Her voice went unsteady, her tone strangely giddy.
He froze. “What’s wrong?”
In response, she passed it to him with a visibly shaking hand. Confused, he plucked it out of her grasp, looked and nearly dropped it himself:
It was a cashier’s check, drawn on an overseas bank and made it out to him, as good as a briefcase full of cash. His hands shook as he looked it over again, certain he’d read it incorrectly.
...
“Is… this thing real?” Maya glanced between the letter and check, staring at the latter like it might disappear.
“It appears to be,” Edgeworth was equally surprised as he examined the check from multiple angles, searching for and finding its watermark and security strip, but still uncertain. “Though I’m not sure how I feel about knowing there are Equestrian interests on Earth…”
It not only looks better (as I used an actual cashier's check as a template), it now ties into TLaTU much better, where we learned a lot more about those Equestrian interests on Earth and how/from where they operate (note the bank name and signatory! The date on the check also reflects the fact that TAS was set between the second and third game, which according to timeline takes place in 2018.) Suffice it to say, Equestria and Celestia have well-established presences on Earth going back centuries, which Celestia explains at some length in TLaTU during the course of a chess match with Miles Edgeworth. If you just want that chapter (which is non-adult), here it is:
As for Epilogue - All Good Things, no real changes other than cleanup there. I think it wraps up the story quite nicely and sets the stage for the next one and an eventual sequel. So now, some closing thoughts on the revamp:
It's hard to believe, but I've spent well over six years on this story now from the time I first picked up and began editing it for Raven (ChromeRegios), and at times, it's all but consumed me. It's been a good project that's showcased both my developing skill as a writer, and spawned several new stories if not a whole new verse (which I call the Phoenixverse) in the process. The revamp took nearly a year, but what's there now is much more polished and smooth, with the shipping more gradual and less jarring. It's a more 'serious' story now as well, with the goofier references removed (like to earlier pony generations), which is what is needed if it's truly to be the flagship story of an entire verse. This story is now its own thing, separate if not quite apart from the videos that inspired it. It takes nothing away from the videos in my view, but merely uses the advantages of the written medium to build on them. As a crossover longfic, I think this version of Turnabout Storm is up there with the top stories in that genre on site.
I know not everyone liked it for one reason or another, and I'm fine with that. I did make some effort to address certain criticisms during the revamp, but ultimately, I think the core story is solid and the many additions enrich it. Would I want anything from this version of the story added to the videos? Honestly, just one thing, and it isn't the shipping: my alternate route to the verdict I think would work well in it, and I might even try to sneak in the Wob Niar/poison joke sequence at the end just to give that a better explanation. But other than that? I'm content with both versions at this point.
So what comes after this? I'm going to give TLaTU the same revamp treatment, and then we're working on the next story in that sequence. The Lawyer and The Unicorn - Phase 2: Trials and Tribulations will feature a new take on events that take place during the third game of the Ace Attorney series, with some rather interesting additions and changes planned. It should launch sometime next year. Also, prereader Silentwoodfire is working on a new story to show what happened with Edgeworth and Rarity during their investigation of the Equestrian Prosecutor's Office. More on that as launch gets closer.
Until then, I'd like to give thanks to my entire prereading team for all their efforts on this yearlong revamp once again, including Silentwoodfire, AJ_Aficionado, Denim_Blue and James CyberLink. Having their input helped a lot, and really made the story shine. Thanks also to everyone who reads and comments on it, and to past figures like TheGoldCrow and original author ChromeRegios, who it seems has settled into her new life as a wife and mother quite nicely! She even named me honorary uncle of her new son... 
You did a good.
Cool. I was waiting for this to be updated completely before I started reading.
Looking forward to that next story.
You did an amazing job. I can't wait for the next story.
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Thank you very much! I always seeing enjoy your comments.
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Well, it’s done, so enjoy!
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Thanks! Can’t quite say when it’ll come yet.
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Appreciated! There’ll be plenty of notice when it’s on the way.
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I eagerly await your latest work, or whenever/if ever I get around to Nightmare Night/Firefly so I can proceed to do what I do best. Snark relentlessly. It's a thankless job (less so since you take time out of your day to actually snark BACK, thanks for that by the way) but it must be done.
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They’re there waiting for you if and when you ever decide to check them out. And trust me, your snark and longposts are VERY much appreciated, and will always earn a response from me. I know full well how much effort goes into those, and how few people do them. Those like you who do earn special respect and attention from me.
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And that means a lot.