The chronicles of Project Horizons : chapter 35 & 36 · 5:06pm Nov 26th, 2018
I don't know how to summarize my thoughts regarding those two chapters. Do they have bad elements ? Most certainly. Do they have stupid elements that pissed me off to no ends ? Of course. Do they have some scenes that made me smile genuinely ? Few and far between but yes, they were there. It is a complicated thing but you'll see that, as per usual, the goods are swarmed by the bads and I honestly wish that it wouldn't be so.
Let's go !
After the little escapade of Pip and BJ, we are welcome with a surprisingly funny scene where Scotch is yelling in the ears of a shitfaced BJ because she has been bribed to do it. It's a genuinely amusing scene which reinforces my belief that Scotch Tape, despite forgiving BJ far too quickly to have tampered with her memories, is still the most well-realized character of this fiction. She's a child character that I'm having a bit of fun following unlike the balls of angst that forms the rest of the group.
Then we have a whole scene that is honestly quite boring. Some chucklefucks of the Twilight Society feel that if BJ is the heir of Twilight that she has the rights to everything behind their secret doors and even to become the leader of their little Illuminati gathering. It's boring because we already know that BJ is the descendant of Twilight and Big Macintosh but what's not boring and downright scary is that... Life Bloom essentially tell us that BJ has the potential to be on par with Twilight if she has a good teacher. I REALLY don't think our little angel of metal doesn't need more boost, thank you very much.
And we have the scene where we see that the secret door doesn't open making me go "Uh ?" and this interrogation to be replied by "Marigold was Twilight's cousin". So essentially, the author is doing something I hate : make you character the descendant of two impressive people but make so she doesn't have to shoulder any responsibilities coming from her heritage. Essentially, Marigold being the one to carry BJ in her womb made so she... isn't considered an heiress ? What was that chapter 34's quote for then :
“So, what… my great great aunt twice removed was Rarity’s cousin? What’s the big deal?” Certainly not something worth dying over, that was for sure.
“If that were it, then it wouldn’t be a big deal. But then there’s Project Steelpony. I expected the data to be damaged. In fact, I was dreading the months or years needed to repair it. After all, trying to force EC-1101 to unseal it when you’re not authorized to do so would hardly be good for Steelpony or the program.” The picture on the projector showed me cutting open a terminal with a chainsaw. The zony began to pace. “However, Steelpony wasn’t damaged. It was unsealed with all its data completely intact. There were files there that even I had forgotten about. The only way that would be possible is if EC-1101 actively removed the seal… and it would only do that for a direct descendant of a Ministry Mare or the Princesses.”
You can literally say "my great great mother was Twilight's cousin" and it would be the same thing. So what, EC-1101 believes her to be Twilight's descendant but the door believes her to be Marigold's ? Is that how that convoluted thing works now ?
Oh ? You'd like me to discuss how BJ sees the weight of being Twilight's heiress and seeing her angst over Homage telling that she's a hero again ? I won't. Because I'm so fucking tired to repeat myself. This character isn't deep or subtle, it repeats the same information time and time again to try and make us see that she's actually a conflicted individual. I am tired to see people call her a hero all the time. BJ believes she's a sack of shit and everyone around her sing her gospel that she's some kind of angel from on high. Hell, even the fucking Goddess is influenced by her, even Spike. So yes, I find no interest in saying how much I don't care about those talks that can be summed up by :
"I'm such a fuck up"
"No you're not"
"Yes I am !"
"No you're not"
Moving on.
The kiss scene ? Fuck... Yeah, so because a drunken BJ kissed Pip, Homage and Glory two people who don't know each other decides to kiss each other in front of her to take their revenge. Anything for the fanboy dream, I suppose.
Let's move on to the library scene where we do see some interesting informations like... the Dealer being Goldenblood ? Honestly, I'd be shocked if it wasn't the case, this talk about how they could have made the war stops if only one of them quit is exactly in line with GB's will to make Luna abdicate. If my theory is confirmed, I'm going to make some steel beams melt with some kerosene. GB really has to be everywhere... As for the rest of the information, we learn that Marigold is Twilight's cousin and that Celestia gives the most formal letter ever to share her condolences. It's actually surprising to see how much Somber fucked up that part since Celestia is such a non-character in FO:E.
I'll skip the scene of the fight and the scene where we learn there is an Enervation ring in the Tenpony because I have nothing to say about them except that I like Scotch tape stealing a bit of BJ's leg. Should it be traumatizing ? Yes, but honestly, I'll take what little bit of fun I can when it involves Scotch Tape.
We have an interesting scene that develops a bit the idea behind the Goddess and how they could use the Gardens of Equestria (even if I doubt you could use the elements of Harmony to do something like she's suggesting) and honestly, while I appreciate this development, we all know that it leads to nothing since... the Goddess is going to die soon. It's a fact, so while learning more about the Goddess can perhaps help make her death a bit more tragic, it remains that, until the Goddess is killed, Lacunae cannot really be interesting. She's a nice one but ultimately, she's stuck in being just a nice tool for the group to use.
We also learn that GB was a teacher at Littlehorn and his mother is called Sundancer and explored the Zebra cultures. We also learn that apparently, Luna and GB were friends... which is a bit funny because we never really saw that relationship in the memory orbs. Sure it can explain why Luna trusts his judgement but that's some blind trust still coming from her. Also... didn't the Professor say that Luna never really had any friends in the Ministries, implying that GB was her only real friend ? I can't confirm it but it truly is a valid interpretation which would only reinforces GB, Gary Stu status.
Then we have a scene where the cast of PH talks with the cast of FO:E which is essentially just fan-service but at least Glory and Calamity have an interesting ideological discussion.
Unlike... the 33 remark. It was stupid before, it is stupid now. I won't grace this joke with more words than that because it infuriates me to no end. And Homage crying about how scared she is for LittlePip won't change a thing. Redundant information... but this one isn't :
“Hey LittlePip…” I gave my slyest grin. “I just couldn’t help but notice that Homage likes mares… and Glory likes mares… and you like mares… and me, well I think the three of you are the cutiest darn trio of fillies collected in the Wasteland. And, as I recall, Twilight once owned a book called the Zebra Sutra. Not suggesting anything. Just saying…” I grinned as lecherously as possible.
Somber go home, you're drunk. You're literally offering a foursome... Don't you think you went far enough in your masturbatory adoration for FO:E ? It's getting hard to watch, very hard to watch.
Then we get a scene where people tells the Goddess that her dream for Unity is pointless because she excludes many races. I thought that the Goddess only wanted to save ponykind, so I don't get what it's being such an issue for her. Somber tried to make the Goddess sympathetic by showing her as a misguided pony that wants to save ponies without knowing how to do it truly effectively for all of Equestria but in doing that, he unfortunately has changed the Goddess too much. Yes, she was based on the Master but what made the Master so relentless was that he was convinced by his goal and extremely hard to convince that his plan was going to fail.
As such, just having Lacunae be the "Yeah, all my doubts" are in there and having BJ just nuking her should make it a bittersweet death but honestly, I can't seem to reconcile the Goddess of PH and the Goddess of FO:E. They are radically different beings. Also :
“All that remains is the certainty of the correctness of her course,” Lacunae said as she looked at LittlePip. “You know she plans to force you into Unity when you uphold your end of the bargain?”
Yeah, no, sorry bud. I know you want to fix that part of FO:E that was incredibly stupid but there is literally no reason for the Goddess NOT to have transformed Velvet and Pip when she captured them. None. The Goddess didn't even try to transform her when she did her whole diversion plan that implied reading her mind when... you know... Unity shares memories. Good try, Somber but there's no saving that.
Everypony was starting to head for the elevators. P-21 carried Scotch on his back, and I felt a warm and fuzzy feeling in my… magical blood pump thing. We started to drift over as well. “You know what sucks? I’m probably going to have to erase everything that happened tonight in the morning,” LittlePip said with a sigh as the four of us filed into the elevator.
“Well…” Homage said with a mysterious little smile as she pushed the button and the doors slid shut. “Best make it a night worth forgetting.”
A foursome... is the seventh memory orb of LittlePip ? I... My god, this is dumb. And please, none of that "It's purposefully ambiguous !". There's no ambiguity, BJ offered a foursome, all people clearly seemed into it and Homage offered some sex. There is no ambiguity in saying "Yeah perhaps they just went in their own room to do a normal 1 on 1." Besides, do you really think Somber would pass on the opportunity to be in the memory orb that Pip never watched and that she carried with her in the SPP ?
Please, have some respect for yourself.
As for sympathizing with Deus' rapist tendencies ? Yeah, no. Fuck you. "Raping people to death was the only thing that made him feel a little bit more equine, more flesh and blood that machine." That's your logic ? So we should sympathize with the poor mass murderer and rapist because his cock was the only thing that helped him retain his sanity... What sanity has he retained exactly ? This scene is stupid and another attempt at making "sympathetic villains" rather than accepting that some people are simply pushed to extremes. Yes, Deus is irredeemable. Should I remind you that he raped his friend because a bitch in the street told him and because he is dumb as a brick ? There's no sympathy to have and so I shall give none.
Oh, and the Goddess is still an uber driver.
***********
The beginning of that chapter is pretty uninteresting to be honest. We only know that Red Eye's army is now having a huge influence on the Hoof and that there are ammo that are being transferred to him. Then we reach Brimstone's Fall.
Honestly, seeing that amount is destruction is quite interesting even if the Hoof could be that easily pacified with Sanguine and a detachment of Red Eye's army, I have to admit that I'm not quite sure why they were that much of a bitch when BJ and Pip came into their army nor why BJ destroyed them that easily back when she just got her braces but nevertheless : CHANGE !
SO we learn that Sanguine threw hundreds of ponies in a rock crusher in the hope to make BJ come to him as soon as possible. He also killed a bunch of people near Stockyards and massacred Megamart and is essentially doing that by retracing step by step the route that BJ took even to the point of burning empty buildings. Sanguine is both dumb and inefficient. Why don't you just destroy all the cities you saw she went to on the map ? Like, what's the point to do such a convoluted thing ?
So we see the horror and Dusty Trail apparently survived a full day with just half a body in an Enervation field and we have a pretty good scene... even if we have the return of the "I'm not an executioner" line that I really didn't miss. So BJ refuses to kill Dusty Trail but P-21 doesn't. It's a genuinely good scene with a lot of emotions in it even if I personally don't care for Dusty Trails. Still, the idea is pretty clear and well executed.
And then we have this scene :
He kicked me so hard that I was knocked on my side. I blinked up at him in astonishment as he glared down at me, his breathing taut and hot. My head spun from the impact, and all I could do was gawk up at him as he sat on my chest.
“If you say the words ‘my fault’, I will hit you again,” he said sharply, then gritted his teeth and spoke slowly, his voice tense. “This wasn’t your fault. None of this. You didn’t know this was going to happen.” He stared down at me. “And if you start with that ‘I’m scum’ or ‘I fucked up’ or anything, I will beat it out of you!”
“I should’ve dealt with Sanguine sooner,” I said. “If I’d--” Again his hooves thumped down against my face. Hard. “I didn’t--” Another thump. “I coulda--” Thump. Finally we just lay there, him panting and me feeling blood trickle from my swelling lip and nostril.
Fucking finally ! Finally the P-21 of chapter 3 that beat the shit out of BJ's self-hatred is back ! My god, where was this character for so damn long ?! Yes, I'm not going to scream that he is redeemed forever because it feels really like a one time thing but still ! Someone punching the face of that joke of a character and making her focus on what to do next rather than whine about how bad she is !
“You sure are one twigged mare,” the Dealer murmured. I glanced over my shoulder at him. “You have a friend die in your hooves, and now you’re giddy with glee at pushing a button while soaked in the blood of murdered ponies.”
Mentionning how stupid the sequence and tone whiplash of your scenes are doesn't make it less stupid, Somber. It actually makes it worse. In any case, I hope that tone whiplash stays at a moderate level. Oh, yeah and I forgot to say that Miss BJesus is now resistant to Enervation in some capacity. Because she needed more things to be trivialized, even the one thing original coming from your fiction, Somber.
Let's skip to Flank directly and the confrontation between Citrine and BJ. It's an interesting and necessary discussion but again, Somber is going to make this confrontation completely pointless because she will give EC 1101 by the end of the chapter. Yes, keeping this key to Equestria caused a lot of death but honestly that's the least of my worry. Citrine is right in saying that she is quite happy to continue causing chaos and disturbances, even when it doesn't concern EC 1101. On that detail I agree because it's part of her dumb character and she'll never try to change that or better yet... alter her behavior in a fashion that makes her own up to her mistakes but still move towards her goal without whining all the way through. BJ seems resolute enough in her speech but we all know that means jack in the long run. She could have asked for the thing to be destroyed, she could have done a lot of things but she chose a path. Now, can she go through that path without constantly fucking up ?
The answer is no. You'll see at the end.
After joking about how Fallen Arch or nearly killing Triage back in the days as if it just was a fender bender thing (My contempt for these characters is quite high), they stock up at Flank. Before they go towards Chapel, BJ and Rampage talk about the rape experience of BJ. It's interesting because BJ really didn't care, mention or think about that horrible experience, not given even the subtlest sign that it has affected her, even going into a foursome right after waking up in a new body. Bad writing ? Yes, completely. Somber was so caught up in his fanboy mode that he forgot about his character being raped.
So what does he do here ? He covers his ass by saying that "she was suppressing it" and then she is so angry that BJ beats Rampage to death. So, let us pause here. While suppressing and avoiding to address an issue is a real technique, it cannot be used to justify not showing any sign of an issue, especially when it's not the first time the author is using this dirty trick of "I'll just say she suppress it and address it whenever I want". There are such things as events that are so traumatic that you can't really hide from it, you can't really just chalk it off like it's some kind of benign thing. So this scene, on top of trying to make the rape have some importance, is another scene where Rampage... gets happily abused by the blind rage of her supposed friend. I'm sorry but... what kind of friendship is that ? Rampage is literally a torture fetish doll that gets happily destroyed just so BJ can get over her own insecurities ? And that's a good thing ?
Yeah, no.
“She was hurt, and you knew it. And you know hurt, Blackjack. But there’s a difference between hurt and right. Her pain didn’t make her right. If pain were all it took to be right, then every half-baked raider in the Wasteland would be right in doing whatever they wanted. We’re all victims, Blackjack. The only difference is what we do with our hurt.” She nudged my rump with her own. “That’ll be fifty caps for one three minute Wasteland therapy session.”
We're all victims ? Yeah, no. Don't even try to say that we're all passive in the hurt that happens to us, especially not BJ. We all suffer but we aren't all the victims of fate or powerless to stop it. It's a stupid sentence that would have needed to be rephrased in "Pain is a part of life. What's important is if you let this pain destroy you or not." There, fixed it... Damn, I hate this circle-jerking of angsty teenagers.
Oh and Evil Star God tries to make BJ evil through his nasty influence, sealing the deal about the war being caused by an Evil Star God that is Evil. Look, it even has cultists. Never saw that before.
The next scene onwars is a sad joke and I want you to see how much of an incredibly... stupid reflection it is. So after a relatively short fight against Psychoshy, this Reaper asks for BJ to save Sanguine she goes from "I'm going to destroy him" to "Maybe killing him is a bad idea ?". I'm sorry but what is going to take for her to be consistent ? The guy destroyed countless people, put her friend through a grinder and in 200 years he always someone that didn't care for morality and life as a whole but she's contemplating the idea of not killing him because she's not "an executioner" ? She shouldn't even entertain the thought, hell, she should know that the only reason she keeps Psychoshy (at least initially) is because she's a descendant of Fluttershy and as such she can unlock Chimera.
Revenge is supposed to be an unstoppable force that consumes you, makes you mad and irrationnal but here, it seems that the desire for revenge can be switched off on command. I'm sure the Count of Monte Cristo would have been a better book if someone just said "Please don't kill them" and then the Count didn't kill them and simply became a fisherman. Stupidity at its finest. Of course, everyone is going to say "You're such a pure heart !" and lick BJ's vagina because of course they do. And you could say "But Plénitude, she decides to kill him still !". Yes, but she seriously faltered and she shouldn't... especially when we see the next thing.
So they actually do have a plan for once and the first step is... to distract Precious by hoping she still likes Scotch Tape enough to be obviously pulled away from the place... Sure. The usual filler fight happen, moving on.
The hostage situation could have been interesting if I didn't think during the whole thing "If Rampage is taking care of Vermillion... why doesn't Lacunae just teleports Sanguine outside the building or somewhere away from his hostages ?" Hell, even if she gave her the file, why not just give a potion to Charity, race the ghoul and take the thing back ? In any case... We have a BJ without a Pipbuck and EC 1101 and I'm currently asking if I should forgive a poorly done scene because of the interesting change it will bring ? We'll see.
Oh and yeah, after her whole spiel about not giving away EC-1101 despite the death it caused. She gives away EC-1101 to save only one life. It's a betrayal of a lot of things but people will essentially say that a hero needs to be heroic in the moment rather than in the long term because heroes doesn't seek true heroism, they only seek the rush of being a hero by winning something.
As for the death of Priest and the whole burial thing, I honestly didn't care. Priest wasn't so much a character than a living death flag so I guess that was it for me.
Closing thoughts : I can't say I'm excited but I'm curious to see how this will evolve.