• Member Since 15th Dec, 2017
  • offline last seen 2 hours ago

Scholarly-Cimmerian


A guy who loves movies, comic books, video games, as well as stories with colorful talking ponies in them.

More Blog Posts250

  • 3 weeks
    This looks interesting - ANTEDILUVIAN

    A short animated film about the dinosaurs, done to celebrate the 200th anniversary of paleontology?

    Featuring animation of the Victorian era imaginings of the "terrible lizards" like Megalosaurus, Iguanodon, and so on?

    This has my curiosity piqued, for sure. :pinkiehappy:

    0 comments · 19 views
  • 3 weeks
    Important Message for a dark topic

    Passing this along.

    Pen Dragon has made an important petition, about a subject that I do believe to quite important and worth people's time and attention.

    In their own words--

    Read More

    4 comments · 83 views
  • 8 weeks
    Fanfic Rec: Scooby-Doo AD 1972

    Hello all. I wanted to do a little promotion of a crossover story with a wild premise, but a great execution. :twilightsmile:

    Read More

    0 comments · 50 views
  • 8 weeks
    Oppenheimer Ending plus Godzilla (1954)

    There've been a number of jokes, or video edits, tying in Christopher Nolan's Oppenheimer with Takashi Yamazaki's Godzilla Minus One. Though this particular mashup is probably my favorite, for reaching all the way back to the original 1954 movie.

    Read More

    0 comments · 67 views
  • 12 weeks
    My Top 5 Movies of 2023

    Hey all. Thought I'd try to ring out 2023 with a listing of the five movies I thought were the best of the year. :pinkiesmile:

    Without further ado, let's begin:

    5) Godzilla Minus One

    Read More

    6 comments · 114 views
Aug
25th
2018

Headcanons: Canterlot High School · 1:42am Aug 25th, 2018

This batch of headcanons was interesting to come up with, mainly because for the first time I was writing not about one person, but about an entire school and some of its staff. Was an interesting experience, a bit hard at points, but still good fun. :twilightsmile:

After this, I'll probably do a headcanon entry for Crystal Prep (with a subsection on Principal Cinch, since she's so connected with that place), and maybe a followup post about the students of both schools...

But that's all down the road. For the moment, let's talk about CHS.

Canterlot High School:

- Thinking about the founding of Canterlot High School was a difficult but entertaining exercise in thinking. Considering that it was kind of a microcosm of Equestria in the first movie, I decided to make a joke and have Canterlot High be the result of a consolidation effort between three schools from back in the day: of course, those schools were run by the EG equivalents of Princess Platinum, Commander Hurricane and Chancellor Puddinghead. (It is very fun for me to imagine the factional infighting from Equestria as a school system squabble, because my own public school experience was marked by a fight over consolidation that took sixteen years to finalize. So yeah, I fully believe that school board disputes can be just as ugly as actual threat of war.)
- Building on the above, I imagined the first administrators of Canterlot High School were the EG equivalents of Clover the Clever (as principal) and Smart Cookie (as vice-principal). Definitely seem like the best choices for the job, yes?
- I've put some thought into wondering about the origins of the rivalry between CHS and Crystal Prep Academy. One idea I kind of kicked around involved CPA being founded as a new private school; perhaps as an alternative to a more "common" school like CHS. (Given how most of the CPA students in Friendship Games have snobs like Jet Set and Upper Crust among them, I really see a kind of classist rivalry between the two schools.)
- Considering talk in Friendship Games that CHS is going through something of a renaissance, I figure that at some point in its history CHS went through a bit of a decline, before recovering more under Celestia and Luna's administration, and then really blossoming after the events of Sunset's reformation. No idea yet what caused said decline (I was very amused by a tidbit in one of Highlord Langslock's stories where the EG Discord was principal before Celestia, but that's not my headcanon here, I can say that), although part of me has been tempted to blame it either on the Blueblood Family or mismanagement caused by Superintendent Neighsay or such. (Damn you, Neighsay!)
- I love the "Queen of Clubs" short given just how many varieties of student groups and clubs that Canterlot High has. I mean seriously, a fencing club? :raritystarry: Who the heck founded that one? (Based on my blog post about Principal Celestia earlier, I do have a fun headcanon about her having a hand in the founding of a motorsports club; given the motocross portion of the Friendship Games and all...) In addition, I also had an idea about Luna having had a role in founding the gaming club at CHS, and by that I mean the O&O group we saw Big Mac, Trixie, Snips and Snails in. Luna seems like the type to enjoy tabletop gaming, yes?

Canterlot High Staff:

- Cranky Doodle is both a math teacher and the school driving instructor, as seen in "A Little Birdie Told Me" and "Driving Miss Shimmer." I actually headcanon that, in a difference to mainstream Equestria, Cranky hasn't yet found and married Matilda, which explains some of his more dickish moments from a few of the shorts (i.e. "So I guess, you fail? Is that fair?").
- Cheerilee is a librarian, and perhaps an English teacher or such, since I think those two would work fairly well together. In regard to the library scene in the first movie where she was a bit... twitchy :rainbowlaugh:... I kind of imagine that she was going through a bad breakup (or divorce, given how her pony counterpart said she "used to be married") and was having a lot of stress.
- Miss Harshwhinny is the history/social studies teacher. She's ultra-strict and pretty well feared by students, and even pre-reformation Sunset treaded carefully around her.
- Steven Magnet is the school drama teacher. I credit this idea to TheNewYorkBrony and their hilarious story "A Rose By Any Other Name". Worth a read, especially if you're someone who had to suffer through high-school enactments of Shakespeare :rainbowlaugh:
- Iron Will is the gym coach. And he's a hell of a character: a ripped, hairy giant of a man who belts out rhyming catchphrases about exercise. XD Fluttershy nearly had a panic attack in freshman year during her first class with him. (Considering the character's more antagonistic turn in later seasons of MLP, my own headcanon is that the EG Iron Will was also something of a jerk, but ended up straightening out for some reason or other.)
- Of course, as we've seen, Granny Smith is the lunch lady at CHS, but she also apparently teaches a home-economics/cooking class, as seen back in "Pinkie on the One." (Wonder how she manages it all? XD)
- We've seen Maud at CHS a couple times, and while my own headcanon about Maud in the EG-verse is that she works at the natural history museum, I've kicked around (thanks in part to conversation with Foxhelm) the idea of Maud working at CHS as, say, a student teacher or a TA. Depends on how old you see Maud as compared to Pinkie, I suppose.
- A popular bit of fanon is that the human-world Discord is the janitor at Canterlot High. I have nothing against that at all (it's used to hilarious effect in Summer Dancer's story "Hot Water" and also has been the source of good fun in Tale Swapper's Myriadverse stories), and headcanon something similar myself, with a bit of an added touch: I kind of imagine the EG Discord as actually being very wealthy, and the janitor work is mainly his way of doing something interesting to ease boredom in his advancing age. *shrug* Hey, it's Discord. For all we know, he's like Groundskeeper Willie and ENJOYS mopping up messes.
- One last bit of staff I made up, was the idea of Spitfire as the girls' coach at CHS. Her story is a bit complicated, in that she was a decorated alum and coach at Crystal Prep Academy (this is in reference to apparent plans early in the making of Friendship Games, to have Spitfire in Indigo Zap's role; while they axed that, I can see CPA's "win or else" ideology having similarities to some of the Wonderbolts' less pleasant moments), but something happened to make her join up at Canterlot High. This incident was seen by Principal Cinch as CHS "poaching" from her, and only hardened her drive to crush Canterlot High in the Friendship Games. (Because let's face it, Cinch would totally view it that way.) Mainly, with this idea, I didn't want to separate Rainbow Dash from Spitfire, since the two's Equestrian counterparts do have a connection, and I wanted to keep that; even if, yes, Spitfire is just a high-school coach and not some celebrity role model or such. *shrugs*

Anyway, those are my major thoughts pertaining to Canterlot High School and its staff.

Next time I post one of these, I'll be looking at the "dark side" of EG schooling, with Crystal Prep, Abacus Cinch... and maybe what the hell, I might do another sub-section there on Cadence too. :twilightsmile: A reminder that not everything at that school is unpleasant.

Comments ( 25 )

Luna seems like the type to enjoy tabletop gaming, yes?

She's been around to see D&D evolve from 1e all the way to 5e. She is a merciless but fair DM. And if you manage to pull something suitably entertaining, you might get a bonus in that regard, she's generous like that, but, on the other hand, she punishes stupidity to prevent people from playing "Chaotic Neutrals" which are actually closer to Chaotic Evil or Chaotic Stupid. NONE of that shit in HER game.

Iron Will was also something of a jerk, but ended up straightening out for some reason or other.

He's very much more bark than bite, he's loud, but if he sees his students are genuinely in trouble or genuinely struggling, he'll approach them to try and offer what help he can, dropping the ham in the process.

*shrug* Hey, it's Discord. For all we know, he's like Groundskeeper Willie and ENJOYS mopping up messes.

He also taught chemistry before he mostly retired from teaching.

I like to imagine that most of the time, CHS is very connected, and if there's something going wrong, like actually wrong, it's going to get up the grapevine and to the Principals so they can fix it as soon as possible REAL quick. Only reason Sunset was able to fracture the school is because she lived with Celestia, she's witnesses less scrupulous nobles and the court generally be stupid, trying to undermine her adoptive mother. And while it doesn't work in the slightest against an immortal demigoddess horse, against mortal teenagers, she's practically a puppet master. And the Dazzlings, well, they had magic.

Some of this lines up pretty well with my headcanons, though there's still a lot of difference here and there. Nothing wrong with that, I assume.

4925315
I like all those headcanons. Especially the ones about Iron Will and Luna. ^_^

Also, good notice about how Sunset was able to fracture the school. After childhood in Canterlot Court (and I'm quite sure that SOMETHING about Canterlot life helped turn her into a bitch), messing with a high school would practically be child's play for her.

4925397
Sure, that's fine. I'm just interested as to what stuff was similar and what was different. XD

Ah, it's all good. ^_^

4925422

Iron Will may be loud, but I don't like him being an outright antagonist. He's demanding, but he's not going to disregard his students' health, if only because then he'd be fired. Celestia is patient, but only so much, and if she feels that someone is not fit, yeah no, they are GONE. I very much DESPISE the idea of a being in a position of power being incompetent, and VERY much like Celestia being a Reasonable Authority Figure.

"So, was Court honestly that bad, darling?"

"You know how your sister and her friends argue? It's basically like that except less hitting each other, more begging 'Oh most beloved Princess Celestia' to fix everything and more ponies who actually have more than 5 braincells between them lamenting their fates and hoping they'll shut up so they can talk to the Princess about actually important shit."

4925424

I very much DESPISE the idea of a being in a position of power being incompetent, and VERY much like Celestia being a Reasonable Authority Figure.

Amen to that. I loathe the fics that portray Celestia (or other similar authority-figure characters in other fandoms) as incompetent or such. A friend of mine once made an evil-Celestia joke in a PM and I told him "NEVER do that again. That joke was never funny to begin with" >_<

4925425

She's as fallible as anyone, she likes trolling ponies, she has a somewhat unconventional sense of teaching, possibly due to her age, she's somewhat detached from the way things work on an interpersonal level, but she was still able to keep Equestria from burning down without Luna. Can't imagine how much that must have HURT. The only other sympathetic immortal as far as she knew, and she was gone, possibly forever.

4925426

she was still able to keep Equestria from burning down without Luna. Can't imagine how much that must have HURT. The only other sympathetic immortal as far as she knew, and she was gone, possibly forever.

Exactly. It burns me up that so many people seem to forget that while Luna had to live with banishment in the moon, Celestia had to live with banishing her own sister, and the guilt of "I should have been better, it's all my fault"... It's like Obi-Wan and Anakin all over again. (Though fortunately, no volcano burns involved.)

But yeah, the tragedy of the two sisters always hit me really hard.

4925428

All the more reason for me to headcanon that they are VIOLENTLY protective of each other and if you hurt so much as one hair on the other's head, well, one will rain down fire and brimstone on you, the other will rain down thunder and lighting. You do NOT piss off the Alicorn who summons thunderstorms with her anger alone. Much less her sister.

4925429
Indeed. Truly threatening harm on the Royal Sisters is the equivalent of annoying a sleeping dragon.

4925430

More like pissing off TWO sleeping dragons. Which one would generally agree is worse.

4925431
Yep. There's easier and less dangerous ways to court death.

Just take a walk in the Everfree. Far less hassle.

4925433

Or annoy ACTUAL sleeping dragons. At least you KNOW you'll get crushed or incinerated. Or ask to be the guinea pig for Starlight and Twilight doing very dangerous magical experiments. Or just make Molestia jokes around Twilight. Or incest jokes around Applejack. Or, if you buy our special Full Death Package for only 20 bits, you can do ALL of these at once! Call now and we'll add in having Rainbow Dash Sonic Rainbooming you ABSOLUTELY free.

4925435
Nice :rainbowlaugh:

(I especially approve of "or make incest jokes around Applejack." God I hate that...)

4925440

While Applejack can take a joke about her being raised in a barn, that's the thing, she can take jokes about HERSELF. She's confident enough that it doesn't bother her. That said, you don't make tasteless jokes about her family. Because that's A, uncalled for, B, pointless, and C, honestly kinda pointlessly petty.

4925442
Nicely said.

Plus, incest is just wrong. If someone made a joke about me and my sister, I don't care how skinny I am or how big the other guy was, I'd fucking kill them. :twilightangry2:

4925444

And I'd be there selling tickets to the show. And charge extra for those who would like to join in.

4925470

Hey, if you're gonna beat up a dumbass, I might as well make some cash off of it. Split 50/50?

4925475

A pleasure doing business with you.

4925475

That aside, I imagine that CHS is very connected and that just about anything, good or bad, makes it through the grapevine at record speed. And for all the jokes about Principal Celestia being useless, she's dealing with things far above her paycheck level. Dealing with a teacher going too far or a student failing miserably is one thing. Dealing with brainwashing Sirens, a raging She Demon, Gaia Everfree and Wallflower's Memory Stone, yeah no, she is way in over her head.

4992685
Of course. And yeah, magic is very much an outside-context problem for the principals. I mean, would anyone really be able to do anything against the Sirens, or against the Memory Stone? No of course not.

4992868

But if it's something within her purview, such as a student being seriously hurt, THEN she can act more than competently. Wonder how she and Luna would react to their Princess counterparts?

4992992
Ooh boy, now that would be something to see.

I wonder what Principal Celestia might say to Princess Celestia about Sunset Shimmer and the circumstances of her arrival in the human world, you know? Hmm...

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