The Doom that Came to Equestria · 8:59pm Jul 8th, 2018
"Girls!" Twilight called, rushing into the map room. Her five loyal friends were already there. Spike clung to her back. "Thank goodness you're here. I need your help! Equestria is in peril!"
"Oh no!" cried Pinkie Pie. "What's wrong? Is it a monster? A plague? A plague of monsters? Monsters carrying the plague? Are we out of pie filling?"
"Worse than any of those. Starlight has gone back to her old ways." Twilight hesitated to even say what came next. Her jaw worked silently, and she forced herself to swallow. "She's up at the hospital, murdering ponies to harvest their organs."
"Well of course she is, darling!" Rarity said. "Killing one pony so that five ponies can live is just good utilitarian ethics. Assuming all lives are equally valuable of course."
Twilight paused. "...what?"
"Ugh." Rainbow rolled her eyes at Rarity. "Why is everything utilitarian with you? Can't she just kill them because there is no universal morality, only the will to power? The idea that sick ponies should remain alive is such slave ethics."
"What?"
"Oh. Um." Fluttershy raised a hoof. "Have you asked her if they were meaningfully alive in the first place or if they were just philosophical zombies?"
"What!?" Twilight screamed, her wings flaring out.
"Shucks, Twi! No need to get upset. We've just all been learning from the best dang show on TV. In fact, we should turn the TV on right now, because it's almost time for..."
That's right kids! My Little Pony Generation 5 is here with The Starlight & Pals Magical Half Hour! Join Starlight Glimmer, Spike, Rarity, Fluttershy, Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and all the rest for this fun-filled magical adventure. With this week's special guest, Applejack!
Be part of the adventure with Starlight & Pals as they learn valuable lessons, including: friendship, magic, small claims court, probable cause, sorcery and Nichomachean Ethics!
...
Sigh. I swear, you guys are going to make me write one.
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It's not so bad, georg. Join us. It doesn't even hurt.
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Shit, I'm sorely tempted.
...So, basically, if GaPJaxie was the head writer on MLP, then.
If only
The HubDiscovery Family had its own version of Adult Swim.Oh, that Twinkle Sprinkle! There she goes again, thinking ponies' lives have any meaning in the face of the ravening void of Entropy! awkward pause, followed by uneasy laugh track
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God I want this show to exist.
I would watch every episode and then curl up and wish I could cry.
You know, you could have just said "Hey, guys, that anthology's up!".
I'm glad you didn't. :D
lmao
I love how Pinkie Pie is just normal Pinkie Pie, but somehow she's not at all out of place.