The Broken Bond is REWRITTEN! What does this mean? · 4:45pm Apr 24th, 2018
Returning fans, you’re probably wondering what this means. New, potential readers are likely wondering the same.
Well, let me explain. It’s actually quite simple - and it explains where I’ve been and why I took the story down.
Back in February, I submitted this story to Equestria Daily and got a letter back telling me, while my story and characters are sound, the actual writing itself needs a heck of a lotta TLC. Not only that, but before, I’ve been writing this story incorrectly the entire time!
Before, my writing was very lavish and expository, instead of letting the emotions and actions speak for themselves. I had too much of a guiding hand, so to speak, and it made for a taxing read for those who couldn’t stomach it.
Therefore, I changed my writing style into a limited third person narrator, in which the pony you are following is the one who colors the portion’s narrative voice. Ergo, when you’re following Starlight, the prose is very casual and uncertain, and sometimes frantic. Meanwhile Twilight’s would be cautious, analytical, and sometimes a little bit manic. You will get a better sense of what I mean when/if you read it.
This, as a result, has made the narrative a lot easier to read and yields more organic emotion from the reader, instead of “telling” them what to feel. However, it is close to being finished but not yet - I only have two chapters to really get down on and I'm mostly done with one. I'm just in the process of giving it a close edit. These will show up within the next seven days, but it'd been almost two months since I last updated. I needed to do this.
One thing to note: while the story and sequence of events are the same, a few scenes have changed, been elaborated on, or added altogether to flesh out what occurs and what the characters are feeling. So if you’re an old reader, I highly recommend you give this story another read. It’ll be like experiencing the story in a whole different way!
I hope you all enjoy. The link to this post will be deleted when I post the first chapter of Part IV - Laughter.
I'm getting 404s on all the chapter links.
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Sorry. Are they visible yet? How are you finding the story, by the way? Does it say published in the black bar? You may have to wait for the story to actually pop up on the site (despite me doing instant submission).
I was somewhat under the impression you had serious issues with the conduct of Equestria Daily - in the past at least - what changed, man?
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It's up now. Quite like the rewrite!
Yay!!!
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I grew up, long story short.
And long time no see man!
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Yeah. I can sort of relate. I'm still pretty anti-community by nature because they devolve into circlejerks very easily but as I've gained more years I've come to the understanding that it's simply human nature rather than human stupidity as I used to (wrongly) think. Life gives interesting perspective does it not?
Hey, mate. It's nice to see you around. How's it been? Speaking of getting older, have you grown out of consoles yet? Because I've got a friend request on Steam with your name on it, if you'll have me.
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Oh yes, life does give into interesting perspectives. I've learned that a lot of people actually have really fucked up upbringings and I'm one of the lucky few who is the normal friend they retreat to. It's my place to be there for them.
I've been always developing my writing ability, just in other fandoms. My sense of character and whatnot. That's my strongest suit; drama. This story is teaching me how to genuinely be a better writer. I'm going to quickly go through the first five chapters.
And sorry my man, I would love to have a PC to play games on. I'm a PS4 guy and even then I don't really have time for video games these days, what with college and my writing. I'm creeping through Prey for the first time. It'll take me a while at the rate I'm going.
Hey... have you played The Witcher games?
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Indeed. It's a journey, and a very interesting one at that. Most of the time.
That's very noble of you, and hey, I'm sure they appreciate it. Can't say I really know anyone with issues like that, though I'll fully admit I've only ever had a small but very tight knit circle of close friends and that's not something people easily spill.
Oh, really? I had no idea. What other fandoms? I've only ever read (mostly) MLP fanfiction myself because not only is this site extremely well optimized for use the MLP: FIM -universe is actually surprisingly rich in the sense that it doesn't really pigeon hold the writer into obtrusive standards. Sure, there are rules and some boundaries, but it's great how seamlessly something for kids can be re-imagined into something for adults. So much so, that I maintain the best stories on the site are better than the best episodes of the series. As a side note, you have a knack for witty dialogue, too. The proof's in the pudding, and the pudding is MLG. To this day I still sometimes think back to the best moments of that story and they are almost all carried by your (somewhat edgy) portrayal of Glados and her ability to bring the smackdown on someone with that quick tongue of hers. I mean, shit, even when there's a tender moment you managed to cultivate an atmosphere where the whole mood could change at a moments notice after a few unexpected blunt words. From serious to jovial, from jovial to dark, from dark to sad, from sad to hilarious. It's great, it's unique and the spice of the story.
To be frank with you, I haven't actually read this story you made the blog post about because I have a hard time becoming invested in tragedies so the tag kind of turned me off. I'm not a sociopath, I've shed some tears in the past while reading some good shit, I just don't find tragedies to be, by nature, all that interesting. That's not to say I'm opposed to them or somesuch, it's just not something I search for in a story. I do heartily approve of the Starlight Glimmer love you seem to have going on, however. I've come to regard both her and Sunset Shimmer as easily the best characters in the show so far!
Damn it. I figured, but I thought I'd ask nonetheless. Prey's a good game, it took me a good while to "creep" through it since it's actually pretty long and not the easiest game I've ever played, either. The atmosphere is great and I really enjoyed how many options you had to do basically anything, even if it was something menial like getting through a closed door. If you like this sort of game, I highly suggest System Shock 2 if you ever get the chance. It's from the 90s but still pretty creepy.
Not as of yet. I bought the first two on Steam when they were on sale for like four euros each, so they're on my agenda. I know it's the third one that gets all the love, and probably rightly so, but if I get invested in something I have a hard time justifying starting anywhere but the beginning.
Anyways, it's good to see you around here man. It just wasn't the same after you left.
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Believe me when I say I'm not being prejudiced, because this isn't something to be proud of, but I think it's an American thing - that this kind of upbringing is common. Social structure of American families are very specific in what affects them and how the parents were raised. And as you know, that shit echoes down the future generations.
But on the other hand, it could be, as you said. It may not be something people easily spill, but these were things I learned about friends that I've had for literal years - since before I even joined this site.
Adventure Time, Star vs. the Forces of Evil, Steven Universe. AT is actually what made me leave the site the first time. That show is just incredible, that when I first got into it it seemed to eclipse MLP in every aspect (now I am learned enough in visual media and how it works, as well as writing in general, to love this show for its own strengths).
Don't mention My Little GLaDOS man! Ha, I know I need to update that when I get The Broken Bond squared away. The next chapter is going to be fun.
What is it about tragedies that put you off? Because I do think you'll like this story - especially with it being Starlight-related and your opinion of her.
Starlight is amazing. One thing I have to toot about my story is it understands her character completely. It doesn't get biased with "teh peddy backstroy" or any of that shit.
I've heard of System Shock 2. That game is on my bucket list, for sure.
I ask because I remember how we used to love Mass Effect. The Witcher is a truly amazing character-based story. It's great you're starting from the first game, because although the third game is the best in the series, I can tell you the second one is still one of the best games ever made. Fantastic story, branching narrative, great characters, beautiful graphics, satisfying combat and it's a long game too.
It's a complicated story though, because of this. There are a lot of characters and places whose names the game expects you to remember, and if you don't, rely on its glossary. But this game series is so rewarding if you put a lot into it.
Although the games take place after the books, they do a great job at getting players who've never read them into the world and familiar with its characters. It has some of the coolest concepts I've ever seen in fantasy, to boot. Particularly with the monsters and the contracts Geralt takes up.
In the second game, one of the biggest contracts he ever does is in the midst of a war. Two neighboring kingdoms are squabbling over their border in a stretch of land called the Pontar Valley. They've fought there before, except in the last battle the court mage of one of the kingdoms decided to win the war in one, decisive move - as bodies were piling on both sides and lives were being thrown away. So she calls upon a meteor strike which roasts hundreds of souls on both sides and forces them to retreat. For her actions, she is sentenced to a burning at the stake, where in her last screams she casts a curse upon the battlefield. Now the souls who died in that battle are locked in eternal combat, forever, constantly dying and rising and fighting that war as it happened.
Geralt is called upon to lit the curse so the armies can fight. Also you meet this thing - a Draug. Listen with headphones, his voice design is amazing. Witcher's versions of Draugs are manifestations of truly bloodthirsty souls who died in battle, not feeling at peace with their death - incomplete.
Anyway, yeah - where've you been this whole time, man? Believe me, I didn't like not being here. I felt bad for all my followers who thought I just left without a word, but I was afraid of coming back empty handed and then things kept coming up... It was a mess. But I'm back now! Hopefully for a good long while .
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Well, I think that's true by default pretty much anywhere. I don't know if I can really quantify what you mean when you say "American thing". I mean, my wholly American father has ten siblings - that's not a very typical "American Experience" either. More like a clan or something
I've heard of Adventure Time, and it's been recommended to me, but the other two escape me. I'll have to check them out and see if they pique my interest.
Oi! I just used it to iterate my point. That being said, I've been thinking about that story lately, for whatever reason, so my body is ready for whatever you're gonna throw at us.
I had to think about this for a while. Honestly, I think the problem is the very nature of Fanfiction itself. I don't know how you treat each story you read, but I tend to isolate them from each other unless I'm reading a direct sequel - but that's actually impossible, since the writer inevitably draws upon the pre-established source material. I know that seems obvious as fuck, but bear with me for a while here. Tragedies come to their own if you're invested in the plight of a character. They follow a predictable timeline all the way to the anticlimax and if the reader is sufficiently invested, they'll inevitably revel in the negative emotions the whole story is built to capitalize on. Due to the nature of Fanfiction, I have a hard time appreciating said climax, because there are no tangible, negative consequences for the character. The best tragedies have a sense of finality to them, because that's what ultimately makes the reader sad. To be completely honest with you, I've come to think that tragedies and Fanfiction go together about as well as oil and water. I've read more than a few over the years and most have come off as more than a bit pretentious at times. I'm not saying it can't be done, but what I am saying it's extremely hard to pull off convincingly with a pre-established character and setting. Ironically this is also why I'm not the biggest fan of shipping, either. I like romance as much as anyone but I have a much easier time believing it's more implied rather than outright told to me. Like I said, it can be done right but getting the pace right for it to be satisfying is extremely delicate business. There are some masterful examples but also a lot, I'll say it again, a lot of bad ones that instantly shatter my suspension of disbelief and in turn completely kill my interest.
That being said, I'll still read your story since you're recommending it.
I really love Starlight as a character. Not only is she crazy powerful but she's also the one who has enjoyed the most character development these last few seasons. She isn't perfect, either, and she'd be the first to admit it. It's just neat to see since the Main-Six have grown to be a bit too saint-like for my tastes, with the possible exception of Twilight. Starlight's design is also the most aesthetically pleasing, bar none.
On the subject of her backstory, I kind of get where people are coming from when they say it's a bit on the weak side - but honestly, so was Luna's. They're very similar, expect for their motivations: One by jealousy and the other by abandonment, ultimately leading for a desire for vengeance.
The atmosphere is epic. I'll say no more. It's not my favourite game of all time, but it's up there. It's also very hard, so do some research to preserve your sanity if you ever get around to playing it.
Speak for yourself, I still love Mass Effect even though I understand that from the second game onward the story is objectively quite bad.
The world building is great, however, and I really love the ME Universe.
I'll get around to them eventually. Usually when I start something as big and as lore-intensive as the Witcher I invest some time into figuring out the basics before I actually play the game. It's just how I roll. I don't think I'll have the free time to get around to them until I have a chance to take some vacation time this summer, but that's fine with me, because even though I really like fantasy as a genre I'm not feeling it right now. It probably has something to do with the fact that I just re-read The Lord of the Rings, the Hobbit and watched the three LotR movies for comparison. I'll get the spark back, don't you worry!
Holy shit.
Oh, I've been around. I've become more of a lurker than anything else after you left but I still make it a point to occasionally comment at other writers too, sometimes to show support, occasionally to criticize. I never left this fandom in the sense that I still keep up with the newest episodes, read a lot of fics while I have the free time or while commuting to work. I'm actually surprised how invested I still am considering this account was made on the 24th of June 2012 and I started enjoying the show a bit before then. Life's been treating me well, in fact I feel like every year is just better than the last. Hopefully I'll be studying by fall, since my whole plan was to work for a few years after my service completed so I could live (very comfortably
) off my savings. So yeah, taking my sweet time but feeling good about it.
Hey, man, I missed you a lot while you were away. I just figured you had moved on to other things, y'know? I didn't blame you for that, and I doubt anyone who actually gives a damn did either. Sure, we made a few jokes about seeing you in Hell and stuff like that but I don't ever recall feeling betrayed or anything so grandiose. What's important is that you're here now, enjoying yourself, is it not? Life's too short for regrets.
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I didn't really elaborate what I meant by "American thing" because, well, that's an ugly subject area that I think everyone on the internet should avoid if they don't want to start something.
In essence, the general vibe of Americans and what they value, and how this trickles down into our social structure - right down to the family unit - it paints a reality where, more often than not, children aren't provided with a stable, nurturing environment.
Adventure Time's writing is great because of how natural it all is. There's a clear sense that a lot of time passes between episodes, and in those episodes we're only seeing glimpses of these characters' everyday lives. The dialogue is a lot of fun, and it sounds really organic because the voice actors are gathered around a table facing each other instead of being alone in a recording booth like usual. The characters are written like real people - they develop like them, are autonomous, etc.
I'm not enthusiastic enough about the other shows to try and convince you to watch them. Star vs. maybe, but Steven Universe is real mess of a show.
Because you're an internet-bro, I'll give you a sneak preview: you know that Pixar movie, Inside Out? It's about the five main emotions, personified. Although this next chapter (and yeah the whole story) still has a plan, Discord was just going to harass Glados until her fragile body gets broken, and Ditzy is forced to help her. But with Glados being white and so emotionally cut off, Discord thinks it'll be such good fun to have her finally open up. Ergo, Glados is going to glow five different colors depending on her emotion, which she's going to express wildly, yet honestly.
It's going to be my usual MLG blend of hilariousness and underlying sadness.
That's kind of you, thanks man.
I can totally understand your reasoning, since I really feel the same way about shipping. Using MLP, since its relevant, I cannot stand Mane Six shipping. I have this weird thing where it's "too different" from the source material, so when two characters pair up it, by default, just doesn't make sense because it's not how they are. That's why my biggest priority when writing fanfiction is to ensure all of the characters are actually behaving and reacting in-character.
I can't speak for how you'll feel about 'The Broken Bond,' however - and that isn't a bad thing. What I'm a little more than proud of with this fic, is everything that happens in it is purely a result of the characters being themselves. As a result, the tragedy of watching Starlight and Twilight fall apart has hit the readers harder because it isn't really anyone's "fault." That just makes it more potent. But the true 'tragedy' of The Broken Bond is not really knowing what it's for, or even what, precisely, the title is referring to.
I don't know how such fanfictions can come off as pretentious (sounds interesting though!).
In short, I'll leave you with this on 'The Broken Bond' - it has tragic moments and tragic characters, and Starlight's existence is tragic on every level. However, this story is not pessimistic, and it isn't edgy (at least I hope it isn't). The true ending of the story is bittersweet.
Believe me when I tell you that my favorite thing to talk about in this show is Starlight, hands down. However, I've been doing so much of that with fans and my editor that I'm kind of Starlighted-out. You'll get a sense of how I feel about her in how I perceive her character through reading The Broken Bond, where afterwards if you have anything to say we can start a conversation.
It has been years since I've played Mass Effect. However, the best part about it is the thing I care about most in a piece of media: the characters. Where its plot fails, the characters of Mass Effect remain as some of the most developed in gaming. And that's not even mentioning everything else that's great about Mass Effect's only three games: the music is fantastic. The voice acting is so good, and gives everyone a lot of character. The emotion is always well-written when the plot (only occasionally, let's be honest) fails.
This is just making me think about Andromeda though. Andromeda sucks so much hot rotten ass.
I feel you. When I'm first experiencing a new "thing" whether its a book, game, movie or show, I cannot enjoy myself as well as I could be until I have most of the characters' names memorized.
Witcher made me cry in agony because of this.
But not the Hobbit movies, I see.
I confess, I love those films almost as much as LOTR. I'd defend them to my dying breath.
I never abandoned the show but good God was I out of it.
What really killed it was post-season 4. Awesome season, then we had eleven months, almost an entire YEAR, before getting season 5 (which I consider the best season of the show FYI). In that time I'd gotten into Adventure Time and A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones - properties with fantastic characters, among other things. Every time I would look to MLP I'd just sigh with disappointment because it wasn't like these two things. Yet, amidst all of this, I was also super into Rainbow Rocks. Sunset's struggles and all the amazing fanfics about the Dazzlings were what I wanted from the show, but felt like I never got.
Season 5's beginning didn't help much. Though my tune's definitely changed now, those first several episodes just didn't engage me in the way MLP had before, and does once more now. It felt like something about the show changed but it was me. The only episodes that I really liked was Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep and Amending Fences (holy hell is that one a great episode of television in general). I still kept up with it though, only for the sake of seeing each new release.
Then the CMC got their marks in an episode where a Diamond Tiara song made me tear up. That's when I fell in love with the show again, and only eight episodes later we got the best season finale of the show to date, with a character who I, unlike most at the time, understood in the sense of why she acted the way she did.
Not in an excusable way, but in a human way. Honestly, if Starlight wasn't added to the main cast I can't see myself being as invested in the show as I am now.
It's great to hear that you've got a solid plan with a clear future in sight. I wish it were that easy for me! But alas, I'm taking it one step at a time, and good fortune has carried me so far (along with my charisma - thank god I'm a great bullshitter
)
Eh, I still feel bad for not even leaving a blog post. That, at least, would have been appreciated but I was, well, acting like Starlight: I was too afraid of just coming back empty-handed after being gone for so long, that I didn't let anyone know where I was at. And that just kept going and going and going...
But I'm over it. Right now I have a stigma of starting stories and never finishing them, but I'm going to finish The Broken Bond and dispel that. It's a story I've had in my head (and heart) for quite a long time. In some ways, years.
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I do, actually. I saw the end of it when I came home from work on a Friday this winter. It seemed pretty cool, but I never got around to actually watching the whole movie. Funnily, the last "kiddie" movie I watched and vehemently enjoyed was Zootopia. Sweet Mother of Mercy that was a good movie! I watched it at my friend's house whilst we were drinking. It actually impressed me on such a level that I went and bought it the very next day so I could watch it again.
Wow. I can see the potential... Can't wait! (And thanks!)
Exactly. It just doesn't work in a way that is convincing. It's possible to change the formulae quite convincingly but ultimately the line between "believable" within the context of the show is isn't very subtle. The Mane Six are just too well established. The vision of who they are is too uniform and inevitably persists from story-to-story. But being too faithful can be annoying too, and you can see this in some of the clichés. For some reason every OC gets a Pinkie party. And then they go to the spa. And then they have a sing-along, which is then clumsily explained to be inherent to the magic of Equestria, yada-yada-yada. I've never noticed you doing this, this is just another example.
I'll hit you up once I'm done with it. It does seem interesting based on the synopsis and while I was initially perturbed by the tags, I do pride myself on my ability to keep an open mind. So at this point it's not a question of "if" but of "when". Soon. It's too late at night for me to get to it now...
Well, let's create a basic and clichéd example: Let's say Twilight became an alicorn as she did in the show, and let's for the sake of argument say she's also immortal. Time passes, her friends age, have children, (high points) move through life and die while she herself stays static and eternal (middle points). She never accepts the loss of her friends (and husband? if you want to throw that in) even though they all die by natural causes. She feels unworthy, and no amount of consolation from Celestia and Luna can help (beginning of the lowest points). Eventually, something unexpected happens; Spike dies because of a skirmish or something in the dragon lands. Now Twilight truly has nothing left (hitting the lowest point). In her anguish, she suicides herself in some dramatic fashion due to having nothing else to live for. Equestria would go on regardless of her death, so what's the point in living? And so on.
Maybe pretentious was a bit of a poor adjective. But there's a certain predictability to that hypothetical story I don't like. I also think you need to be a very good writer to "justify" that sort of ending for it to be convincing, and I've yet to come across one. Brutus was Caesar's best friend, and the tragedy of that story stems from the fact that Caesar could not conceive that his best friend would not only plot to murder him, but actually succeed in doing so. There's a certain finality to that story (even though this really happened) and because of that, it works. But if I have any lingering doubts about character motivation, character traits, tons of pre-established source material where things would certainly turn out differently, and no actual feeling of finality, I don't really care that Caesar was murdered by his best friend. What I'm supposed to feel is ruined by the internal context of the source universe.
This is my issue with MLP tragedies. Then again I may have just come across some bad ones, and I fully attest to the fact that my view on the subject may be somewhat biased and overly simplistic.
You do edgy well, though.
I'd be game, for sure. By the way, Starlighted-out or Starlit out?
I've always considered the world to be most important part since that's what allows great characters and a plots to exist. Mass Effect does have a ton of absolutely amazing and iconic characters. Sure, there are some stinkers (like Jacob, Kaidan and even Ashley) but most everyone else behaves, talks, and feels like a normal person. With the obvious exception of Shepard, who's so far from normalcy it's actually pretty epic. Oh, and the score is friggin' fantastic, you're right about that. That Sovereign theme isn't something you forget, and neither is the Illusive Man's theme, Liara's theme, the Citadel's theme...
I understand what you mean, but that doesn't really excuse the fact that the second game doesn't really have a point to it (though it is an excellent game throughout) and the third one, while more than solid for about 90% of it's duration had to play catch-up because everyone was busy shooting up mercs for a year rather than really focusing on how to deal with the biggest threat in the Galaxy.
Well, no. They're on the "ok" -end of the spectrum for me. Smaug was awesome and he alone almost made the second movie great in it's own right, but I also have to confess I never got too into them beyond going to see them on the opening nights. My problem was that I didn't really like any character in the films. Not even Bilbo. That's why especially the third movie lost a lot of it's "oompf" factor in my books.
That's actually something I've noticed with the current season as well. So far, none of the stand-alone episodes have been very good (except maybe the Maud one) and I think the opening two-parter is among the worst, if not the worse episode(s) of the whole show in it's entirety. It was just so fucking boring.
I agree wholeheartedly. She's not the breath of life the show needed but she is and has become unquestionably the best character in the least amount of time.
Plans are such fragile things. But I have goals. Like being comfy, having a nice overhead of wealth, people to care about, and tons of open options. Good thing I've built a solid self-esteem throughout my life, so taking different path than my peers doesn't bother me in the slightest.
In that case I'll just say it's good to have you back, man. It's 1:34 am now and I can't think of anything substantial to say... Good thing I don't need wake up tomorrow
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Now I understand. Well, my man, I can guarantee this story isn't like those.
I do, that's the sad part. I'm pretty sure The Broken Bond IS edgy - but its Starlight's brand of edginess. So everything is played off very lightly because, well, that's how she is.
Starlit out sounds way dumber, I'll pick that one
It's hilarious how the human characters are the least human. I mean, yeah they are - but they're incredibly boring people. None of them are complex, yet, people are. I think they could have really made up for Jacob by giving him a more standout personality... but he's wheat bread. I mean white bread.
Did you know the reason I got into Mass Effect in the first place was because of 3's ending? Particularly the song, An End Once and for All? I'm a sucker for soft-ass piano music. Gets me every time.
And, yeah, 2's plot is nothing but it was written that way (badly that is) to be a vehicle for meeting these characters. I do like the Collector stuff though. Third game's Crucible plot is what really hurts the thing, but for me it succeeds as a whole because of the emotional beats it nails - for both Paragon and Renegade (Rannoch man, god damn. I don't think there's a time in gaming history where more players sat at the controller and genuinely thought hard and desperately about which race to save - I wish it was more impossible to save both, like you had to have even more checks to pass).
I thought The Maud Couple and Surf and/or Turf were great. I really liked the premiere though. The themes about education and breaking down preconceived notions through familiarity (cough friendship), were well-rounded. The conflict was sensible and not "plot convenienced" like literally every other premiere except for 6 and 7's had been. The characters, despite there being many, all had a fun moment, while Twilight had a good central role for her character, and Starlight demonstrated her strengths and the point in her relationship with Twi in a single scene. All the while, the Student Six had clear facets to their personalities that you learned about as you watched them - even in the songs!
It's one of my favorites, I'll be honest. If I had to rank the premieres from Least to Best it'd go:
7 - Friendship is Magic
6 - The Return of Harmony
5 - Princess Twilight Sparkle
4 - The Crystal Empire
3 - School Daze
2 - Celestial Advice
1 - The Cutie Map
It's a different list from what the majority would likely make it - especially with Return of Harmony and Celestial Advice's placement. Finales would be even more controversial.
Also, hey
I just realized my new laptop can, actually, run Witcher 1. I know next to nothing about PC gaming, in case you can't tell. It can even run System Shock 2!
So, yeah man, I can actually have you. Just give me, like, a week or so to actually get to setting the thing up.
I've been reading the Broken Bond on-and-off today, whenever I've had the chance. You got me hooked, for sure, and you're right about it not being anything like the generalities I described - it's fucking good. Really good, actually and one of the better stories I've read in recent memory. Honestly the only thing that confuses me at the moment (11 chapters in) is that there's a noticeable rise in quality after Starlight met the Witches.. I'll try to come up with something more substantial once I'm done and muddled the whole thing over more thoroughly. Other than that, fantastic job so far, Apex.
I didn't know that, actually. I'm assuming you played them in the correct order, though? My story is a lot more clear cut, because I'm a huge fan of Science Fiction, I knew I'd one day give Mass Effect a shot. Eventually, when all three games were released, I bought the first game on Steam, played for like 15 minutes thinking I'd just wasted twenty or so euros. Then Saren shot Nihlus - and I played for like ten hours straight. It's a good song, though. Not my favourite in the series but I can see where you're coming from.
Yep, and while the second game doesn't make a lot of sense if you look at the main overarching plot, they did nail the side ones, but it's at times hard to shake that feeling of "what the fuck are we actually doing here?" - especially when you consider how small a role the Collectors ultimately play in the game. Out of a thirty or so hour game you spend maybe a one tenth of the duration doing something about the Collectors, while spending the rest of the time gallivanting around the Galaxy fixing other peoples' inter-personal relationships. It's a solid 8/10 because the world building was done extremely well, the characters are great and the stakes, while not as high as in the first game, still feel very foreboding.
Honestly speaking if I could change one thing in the series it's the Crucible. I accept that the Reapers may have been too powerful to defeat conventionally (and that, by it's very nature warrants the use of some Deus ex Machina) but they already had such a device: The Klendagon Weapon.
"Klendagon's most striking feature is, of course, the Great Rift valley that stretches across the southern hemisphere. What is most fascinating about the Rift is that it does not appear to be natural. The geological record suggests it is the result of a "glancing blow" by a mass accelerator round of unimaginable destructive power. This occurred some thirty-seven million years ago." -Mass Effect Wiki
I don't know how they could have incorporated this convincingly in ME3's story, but it was pre-established in the second game to not only exist, but to have taken out a Reaper. Sure, it was "defunct" but it's more tangible as Deus ex Machina -device and I could have done without picking an arbitrary colour, sacrificing the Citadel, and all the senseless exposition of the actual ending.
What a great ending. I especially like that fact that picking one over the other never felt "right" - there's a lot of conflict there. I'm actually dying to replay all of the games after thinking about them so much...
The Maud episode was really good. Cute. I haven't had time to watch the one that came out last Saturday, sadly.
Perhaps. There were some working themes, for sure, but it was also extremely boring, at least for me. Not many episodes have been so tedious I've wanted to skip them altogether but unfortunately this was one of them. I also found the premise (mainly the idea of the school) to be quite daft, but I can live with it.
I think I disagree with every placement on your list except The Cutie Map which I also find to be the best of them all
. I think you could field a strong argument why that premier is actually among the best episodes in the entire series, though I do think there a few (just a few) better ones. What about The Crystalling?
Weow, that came out of the left field! My advice would be to not worry about it. These days installing games is extremely streamlined and easy, especially through Steam. I'm a PC gamer myself, though I wouldn't necessarily describe myself as tech savvy - actually, I have my brother help me if I have any problems with my computer or if I can't get something to work. But that's pretty rare these days since newer games don't have compatibility problems like some of the older shit I have laying around that still tickles my fancy.
Like I said, if you like Prey, you'll like SS2. I have no doubt it'll work. Keep in mind that the game is from 1999 so it doesn't hold your hand when you actually play it. Also, whatever you do, whatever style you choose to play, remember: INVEST IN HACKING! Pay attention to the details, revel in the (creepy) atmosphere and appreciate the excellent lighting, and you'll love this game. I'll say no more.
Shoot me a private message once you're comfortable, so I won't kickblock you the second you add me. It's a (bad) habit from the days I used to be quite well known on a Team Fortress 2 server. I didn't do anything bad, worry not, but I got sick of people trying to trade stuff with me when I didn't really care for that aspect of the game to begin with
because I had some expensive shit from a few unboxes until I gave it all away.
Thanks SliQ. I'm interested to hear your thoughts but I think I understand where you're coming from about the quality. Aside from the first two being setup, and 1.3 only being run through today (but not yet updated), the chapter where Starlight meets the witches has yet to be looked over, tightened up, and given more of Starlight's unique narrative voice. I'm going to do that this weekend hopefully.
Nah, I didn't play the first game until I beat the third. I got the second one first and it came with a code to make the important choices of the first game. It was sufficient - I loved every moment of ME2.
I didn't answer in the last comment but I have to disagree about the importance of world building. It's important, don't mistake me, but I don't think it's as important as characters. You could have the most interesting universe in fiction but the characters are going to be what keeps people attached.
Damn shame that Halo squandered its potential with such a terrible story and characters.
Tell me your favorite. It's the suicide mission, isn't it? And my favorite piece in the series is a tie between An End, Future for the Krogan, and Mordin's Sacrifice.
I reset the mission three times because I just kept hitting the renegade trigger and shooting my husbando, Legion, in the face. That was a big no-no.
Then I made Tali suicide and that whole thing just gutted. Gotta say, while on topic of that scene, god damn does this series have great sound design. It's inconsequential to many but there are several times in the series where the sound design made a scene great and memorable (the Reapers, for instance, and those noises they make). If you go the Destroy Quarian route, it's just dead silence and burning wreckage falls upon Rannoch. Then the Geth Prime's deep, gravelly voice cuts through the silence like a thunderclap when he says, "We regret the deaths... of the Creators."
It is quite daft but I think the problem is how quick it moved. They could have made it work if this school was put together over the course of the first couple episodes. If I were heading the show, two-parter would still be about the Student Six and Neighsay being prejudiced, but have it be at a orientation meet and greet type thing. Then we could have an episode or two where each of the mane six grapples with the fact that they're teachers, and one with Starlight faced with the prospect of guiding the futures of children, and her insecurities facing that.
You're right, I forgot all about that one. Yeah, not gonna lie, that's at number 8. It's not even remotely bad, but I don't find it very entertaining. And as far as Starlight-plots go, this one is actually her very weakest in my opinion. Though she is what saves that episode from mediocrity.
I'm going into this game knowing about SHODAN, the Many, and the Midwives. But nothing about actually going through the game. However, I am used to games not holding your hand. I'm into real games, you see - like Dark Souls.
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Yeah, that explains a lot of things. It was something I was taken aback by because there was something almost hectic how the story was being told, but after roundabout chapter three that "feeling" got substituted for something a tad more reserved, though I can't quite put my finger on for what. I don't know if it was done intentionally; there was a sense of urgency in the plot so it may have very well had something to do with that feeling, but after things "slowed down" so to speak it became a lot more easier, at least for me, to garner what the characters were feeling and why they were acting the way they were. I'll figure out something more substantial to say about the story once I'm totally finished and I've thought on the themes more.
Oh man, that sucks! The thought of missing out on being totally blindsided by the twist in the first game should literally be a crime! I know, I know, it was sort of obvious in hindsight since they did drop a plethora of clues implying that Saren wasn't in complete control of the situation but I admit the first time I got to speak to Sovereign it not only took me by a storm but literally blew my pants off. What a great scene, what a great villain, what a great, albeit short, conversation.
I know I sound like a broken record but also thoroughly enjoyed Mass Effect 2 even though I bash it from time to time. The plot could've done with a re-write, but even so, it has so many good moments (and epic ones) that carry it kicking and screaming to glory. Come to think of it, each time I play that game there are only but a few missions that I don't enjoy re-playing and they're both in the beginning. Recruiting Jack is an extremely tedious at times because there are hardly any conversations to be had, save for the very end, and the enemies tend to be savage when Shepard is at such a low level. The other mission I hate is recruiting Grunt, because the scenery is fucking boring rusty construction, the enemies are always like a kilometer away shooting rockets at you so you have to constantly be in cover, and the only meaningful conversation lasts like thirty seconds or so.
I vehemently disagree with you. Prioritizing world building, especially in science fiction and fantasy, is an absolute paramount. In other words, a great world can somewhat redeem less than stellar characters and even has the ability to create fantastic ones, but even a plethora of great characters cannot save a world that isn't interesting or investing to witness. This of course rings true to the plot as well. I don't know if you've ever read the Harry Potter books, but if you have you'll be aware that the plot isn't all that special, the characters range from static and boring to mediocre and great, but the carrying force behind the franchise is unarguably the world building. J.K. Rowling isn't my favourite author of all time but she absolutely nailed the world building in those books, and that's the single reason why the series got so popular. In essence, her ability to create an engaging world is what elevated her writing from merely having a mediocre set characters and an average plot. It became something epic. I think this is also true for Mass Effect. The characters are great because they exist in a world that had a capacity to spawn them.
I actually haven't ever played Halo (because I don't have an Xbox) but I got really into all of the nitty gritty once, and binged through basically the whole Halo Wiki...
Apparently the first game is arguably one of the greatest shooters of all time, and I've made it a point to play it and the second game at least once in my life.
Actually it's not. I know I may come off at times like I'm purposefully contrarian because I enjoy it disagreeing with people or something, but no, it's not The Suicide Mission, and in all brutal honesty I don't think that one's even in my top 5. In my opinion the quintessential Mass Effect theme will forever be the Citadel theme. This song is what comes to my mind when I think of Mass Effect. It's majestic, uplifting and yet somewhat subdued and mysterious. I just wish it had more length to it.
Another great one is the Illusive Man's theme. There's something about those cellos that's just epic. I'm a bit biased though, because I really like the Illusive Man as a character. Even in the third game, though maybe not at the very end.
A Future for the Krogan is a very good theme too, I fully agree with you on that. It's a very triumphant theme, and that reflects what you just accomplished, though I feel it's only appropriate if you actually cured them, there should be a darker theme for the alternate option.
Obviously Sovereign's theme is way up there, too. Such a short conversation but what a theme! It's iconic, epic, and somehow unnerving at the same time. A theme fitting for a Reaper.
The best "battle theme" is the Final Assault in my books. Not only does it feel like the music amps you up because this is the showdown you've been working towards but the theme sort of combines numerous tracks seamlessly I can't but wonder how they made it sound so good. What a great song.
Holy shit, this happened to me as well. I remember just sitting there, consulting my brother on what to do, because my very first character didn't have anything romantic going on with Tali, so the scales were in complete balance. In the end, I chose the Quarians because I feel like they had earned their second chance. I didn't address it in your last post, but I completely agree with you that actually saving both should be a lot more harder as it is. I've played through the series countless times, and I don't really marry myself to the Paragon/Renegade system and tend to go with my gut so I generally have a lot of both, but almost never ever have I had enough to save both the Quarians and the Geth. I feel like the scene plays a bit better that way. Has more impact. Thought, admittedly, it is extremely satisfying to hear Shepard scream down both and call them basically retarded.
By the way, now that we've sort of touched this topic, who do you prefer: Male Shepard or Female Shepard?
It does. So many things just stick out, like the sound the Reaper beam weapon makes when firing. It's brilliant. Almost, movie like, if not better.
I suppose that may have been a more eloquent way to introduce the school to the show. I just found the episode boring, plain and simple. Nothing really happened and truthfully I didn't find the students to be be exceptionally interesting as characters. That's not to say they're bad, but they don't stand out either, at least to me. I'm hesitant to suggest ways to fix the episode(s) because I'm already somewhat biased against because I thought the premise to be stupid. I guess one could argue that it's important to spread the Magic of Friendship outside of Equestria but at the same time I feel like that's something that comes to it's own far better on a personal scale rather than something that's essential mass produced through a school. The Friendship lessons made sense, hell, even releasing the book that contained all of them made sense, but this? I thought they made it pretty clear throughout the early seasons of the show that friendship is something that you earn, that you nurture, that you share through conflict and interest and you make part of your being - you can't learn it by simply studying it. Twilight tried, and failed, didn't she? I just don't like the contradiction in the philosophy.
Also it was so fucking boring, holy shit.
I liked that episode(s) actually. I watched just yesterday because our conversation reminded me of it. Can I get your two cents on something? Sunburst and Starlight - do you think Starlight loves, or has the capacity to love Sunburst? I detect some chemistry there, especially if you really squint and look at how they keep looking at each other particularly in that episode. I can somehow see it happening (though maybe not on the show, but plausible in fanfiction) since she went sort of crazy when they lost touch with each other. Starlight was also very uncomfortable at the prospect of meeting him again - it may have been just nerves due to it being her first friendship lesson (way to push poor Starlight off the deep end by going straight to Sunburst, Twilight!) but I also feel there may, I'll say it again, may, have been some other reason why she was particularly perturbed at the prospect of meeting him. On an unrelated note, though, I like his character. Simple, yet effective and kind of funny.
You know just about as much as I did when I played through it. Some people consider SHODAN to be better (as an AI villain) than GLaDOS but honestly I don't think it's even close. SHODAN is cool, her voice actress does an excellent job and she can be genuinely unnerving, but at times also a bit bitchy which is strange. However, some of the "fuck you!" -moments are up there with this (WARNING! ACHTUNG! LOUD, THE QUALITY IS BAD, BUT IT GETS THE JOB DONE!) and feel extremely satisfying.
I've never played Dark Souls because I got so fucking mad with them for not porting the first game (which I own) properly to the PC. I know, I know, it's a title best played on consoles but at the same time I wanted to experience it to see if the fabled difficulty makes the game truly so satisfying., but I don't own any consoles save for the PS2 (that I use for my Sly games, the Ratchet and Clank games, as well as Crash Team Racing). I've played some hard-ass games, especially RTS, and wished to see if this game was more frustrating that it is fun. But I'm not going to spend hours figuring out fixes and modding the damn thing, no friggin' way my dude. Apparently the story is pretty good, too.
How the fuck did this get so long? Jeez.
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That's actually a very interesting observation, because that is kind of the point. You're reading this from Starlight's perspective, mainly. The beginning moves fast because what's happening is moving fast.
Put yourself in Starlight's shoes: in the span of two weeks, she watched one of the dearest ponies in her life wither away, in evident pain, as every method to save her fails. Starlight forces herself to feel confident that it will be okay for Spike's sake. Then Celestia "gives up" and Starlight just sort of closes off. She pounces upon the slightest chance she has at saving Twilight - a pure shot in the dark borne of her own desperation that, somehow, turned out to be totally true. Starlight didn't consider the feelings of herself, or anyone else - she only wanted to save Twilight. That's all that mattered.
And then she has the most unexpected aftermath to deal with.
It was a lot to deal with, and Starlight was truly just rushing into it without any real plan. She doesn't stop to talk to anyone or take in the scenery or even really reflect on what she's feeling about all this - it's just about Twilight. This mindset is part of what drives a wedge between the two.
You're right, I was thinking too small. I guess I just have a preference. The Witcher series and A Song of Ice and Fire/Game of Thrones are amazing series because they not only have rich, complex worlds but equally-layered people inhabiting them.
As someone who loved both when he was a simple-minded child, they're okay. They're fun and they have great, complicated shootouts. However, as a whole game if you've played Doom 2016 then they don't really compare.
Boy howdy do you have good taste. Honestly all of Mass Effect's music is fantastic. I'm liking that you have more of a liking to ambient tracks. Sadly, however, I am not as in-tune with ME's music as you are. First and foremost, it's been years. But I digress - those tracks I named were the ones I did because they were tied to emotional moments, elevating those beats to another level.
I think that's what I love most about music in film/TV/games - they are what can tell a story on their own, and usually those are what stand out in people's memories and can cement a scene in their hearts.
I know MLP isn't known for its music, but Starlight's Redemption was what really softened the initial blow of her redemption for me. It really is a beautiful piece. And looking back it's honestly uplifting to see the impact Twilight's had on her life.
If I may go slightly off topic in terms of games, seriously man - The Witcher 3 has one of my favorite soundtracks in gaming. There's areas in the map that have their own combat tracks, and they always fit the place you're fighting in. If you've got a few, I highly recommend you treat your ears to some of this glorious sound.
Most of the music in this game are modified songs sung by a Polish band called Percival. They weirdly fit:
Steel for Humans is for when your knee-deep in muck. Pale, fish-eyed zombies called Drowners burst from the muck, screeching. Goblin-like Foglets emerge from the mist enshrouding you, slashing and snarling. This one's my favorite in the game, and it's a goddamn wedding song.
On Champs-Desoles is one of many combat themes in Touissant, recreated after medieval France. As such, this piece makes the accordion scary (at 1:25)
Silver for Monsters - Words cannot describe the hair-raising discomfort of this song's opening chords, its crescendo with the booming drums, and the deep warbling of the female singer. Especially when it gets real at 1:30 - ensures that dancing around a pack of starving Ghouls never gets old.
And finally, a boss theme - You're Immortal. I've probably taxed your tolerance for yodeling ladies in different languages, but from beginning to end this piece is a story in of itself. Fantastic song, and 0:54 has one of the most badass exchanges in the game:
(It's pouring rain, there's a burning manor beside them)
Boss: Will you wait, sir, for his dribble to subside?
Geralt: Makes no difference to me.
(Draws sword) Boss: Justly said. Now stand, and fight. (fight starts at 1:21) LET THE MUSIC PLAY ON! (lightning teleports to you out of nowhere)
God I'm a nerd for this series
Now I had a romance with Tali, because dammit she's adorable. But the pitiful way Legion asked, "Tali Zorah... does this... unit... have...?" Made me whimper and go, "I wanna save him!"
And then Quarian defeat happens and I can't even save Tali. I was literally staring at the screen for ten minutes: my waifu or my husbando? A choice no one should ever have to make.
FemShep. I like Mark's voice but Hale's has so much more emotion in it. Especially Renegade Femshep. One of her most powerful deliveries is if you try to stop Mordin, and she yells, "Mordin! ...Walk. Away.... I don't have a choice here! Walk away or I will fire!" She seemed so torn whereas Mark just sounded emotionless.
The beginning to ME3 is still one of my favorites in gaming. Seeing the Reapers, hearing those whines and clunks echo in the distance? It's chillingly well-designed.
I get you. I think the problem was Twilight tried making it the teaching-way, while the right way (and the way they do it now) is just learning friendship through experience. The mane six cultivate their areas in their lessons. I think it works in a cartoony way. It's serviceable.
But yeah it's boring for you, that's the main problem
As far as side characters in MLP go, I like Sunburst. He's a solid male character in a show that really doesn't have many of the gender alone, not to mention good characters (though I want to say, I don't think the likes of Prince Rutherford or Big Mac are bad - but they're not really "actual" characters so much as they are "gag" characters - just played for comedy and not for who they are as individuals). Sunburst has appeared very little, but Uncommon Bond especially has painted him as being kind of daft when something isn't spelled out for him. It explains why he lost contact with Starlight on his end. It makes him more relatable and real, just little things like that.
As far as Starlight's feelings are concerned... can I be honest? I don't even think Starlight understands love. In so many ways, particularly emotionally, she's a kid in an adult's body. Starlight never grew up, never got over losing her childhood friend (an age where they would have been too young to realistically feel so strongly about one another). Sunburst's initial reaction seems to be that he forgot about Starlight, or rather, he hasn't thought of her in years. Imagine seeing your childhood friend suddenly on your doorstep!
I think the reason why Starlight was so on-edge about meeting Sunburst was because, well, why did she never contact him to begin with? It's because she was afraid - afraid of rejection, afraid of confirming that he has moved on without her, that she didn't matter to him, and now, on top of all that, she was terrified of what he would think when he realized what she'd done. She probably thought he was going to think her a freak or something.
As far as couples go, I think they do have the capacity to join in a relationship. It sure as fuck is a healthier relationship than StarTrix, but that's a ramble for another comment.
Good god do I love that moment, and love that small but effective ability to shoot before Isaac is done talking. "Goddammit I trusted you! FUCK YOU!" *barrage of pulse rifle* "AND FUCK YOUR MARKER!"
Dead Space is a great series. Damn shame what EA did to it - especially when Awakening proved how scary and creative Visceral can be with this franchise.
Dark Souls is fixed on PC now from what I heard. But you can also play Dark Souls 2 and 3 so really there's no excuse bucko. And yeah, great worlds and a fantastic example of environmental storytelling done exceedingly well. A lot of it you have to think outside the box for, and not read the item descriptions so literally.
We got a lot to say my man.
I know I'm a bit late in seeing this (my fault for not following the author :p ) but personally I've found the story easy to follow and understand what's going through the minds of the characters in this version of their universe. Also if I'm being totally honest, back 3-4 years ago EQD was rather snobby in what stories they would feature or not. I'm no writer but i know some who have tried time and again to get their work on EQD only to get shut down repeatedly. One friend i recall rewrote a story a half a dozen times, and it still wasn't good enough for them. He eventually gave up because he realized that the story was rapidly becoming something entirely different from what he started with.
That said, good luck. ^-^