fimfiction is now under sharia law · 2:11pm Apr 1st, 2018
Hello there.
It's been ages since I've written something relevant for this site that was longer than a throwaway of 1000 words while on a plane, train, or bus, so I figured today would be the best day to talk about the best thing that has happened to me in my life.
A lot of people will say that it's petty to change your faith for love, but I have to satisfy my hijab fetish somehow, and frankly, having grown up SSPX Catholic, I'm already used to religious fundamentalists denying people's right to be fallible human beings and living in eternal guilt for everything I've done no matter if it matters little in the grand scheme of things, so I ended up fitting right in at the local mosque.
.
Thing is, a lot of things have to change in my life in order to please Allah. I can't masturbate anymore, nor can I drink, nor can I eat pork or dog or shrimp. My girlfriend left me as soon as I converted, telling me that it was shallow of me to change my faith for her, so I have that on my conscious. I all I know is that whenever I face East towards Mecca and beg Allah for forgiveness, there's a feeling inside of me that I can't replicate any other way. I'm glad I made this choice. My conscious is clear.
For anyone who doesn't believe me, look at the date.
That's right, it's Easter Sunday. Would I lie to you guys on Easter? That's a sin. Or was a sin. For me. Because I'm Muslim now.
This joke was really low brow but I had to try something also I'm not dead not yet
Allahu Ackbar, guys.
Aloha snack bar to you, as well.
Weak.
I live on a diet of mostly beans and some rice and potatoes just to make sure that all the dietary necessity boxes are checked for every possible prophet except Pythagoras because fuck that asshole and fuck triangles. No one needs them. Triangles are stupid.