Obsolescence

What are you all hoping to see from Obsolescence?

Comments

[Rotorix]

Another chapter.

[Chaotic Dreams]

4777782

You raise a fair and valid point. So you're interested in the story going along the route it's currently travelling?

[Ze1a7in]

4777789
To you I answer: Do birds fly south for the Winter?

[SQA]

A neato cyberpunk adventure, so I'm not opposed to its current trajectory.

[Rotorix]

4777789
I’m not going to try and derail anything that you might have planned for the future, so as long as it keeps its neat cyberpunk atmosphere I’ll be just fine with wherever you choose to take it, as long as it is taken somewhere.

[carmastrikes]

The little green box at the bottom of the story page that says "complete," at the satisfying and natural conclusion to the story.

[Totally Generic Name]

From what I can tell, you've got a cool sci-fi cyberpunk world and a serious plot hook that is begging for some development and maybe a twist. Based on your writing so far, pretty much any direction - dark, comedic, tragic, psychological - could be made to work, but a straight up adventure is what I was expecting. Whatever gets written, it's probably going into my faves.

[Pyro The Reader]

I have yet to read the rewrite, unfortunately, that backlog.

[Keiger]

I'm gonna agree with
4777782

Another chapter would be great. I can't seem to find any Shadowrun cross-overs on here and Obsolescence is about as close as it gets. If it keeps going the general relativistic direction it was going, then I am 120% all over this.
Also. Super-hype over cyberpunk 2077. Soon™

[RoboRed]

Magic, science, mystery, danger, conspiracy, adventure, cyberpunk, lore...

...another chapter.

[backinpie]

For more chapters.

[Slavenger Karl]

Ponies dealing with life in a dystopia, more Neverwas and slowly uncovering the past.

Seeing as there isn't terribly much of the story, you might modyfy it with a semi-rewrite. Treat it as a game adaptation like Fallout Equestria did - end evry chapter with a neat description of a new skill. With the new edition of Cyberpunk rules as well as Cyberpunk 2077 in the works you can get a lot of traction if you get some words going and have groups look at your project.

[Chaotic Dreams]

4943248

I did have something in mind for a more manageable, shorter rewrite that I hope I could actually finish this time. Third time's the charm, maybe? If I did do that, you'd all read it? Same setting, same attention to detail, same basic ideas, but a less sprawling plot.

[Slavenger Karl]

4943364
To be honest your story already was pretty thin for what I used to read. And more sprawling is good because there are people reading this type of content: If it's detailed dystopia, you just keep writing and you advertize it around Fallout Equestria groups. I mean I could do it for you. Maybe the sprawling part is you branching too early before establishing Neverwas as a character with less questions and more motivation when becoming a shadowrunner.

You need motivation in form of people to actually read it and input. Through my years as commenatator here I saw nobodies rise to greatness. But you have far too good of an idea, far too good artwork and far too good hype of Cyberpunk brewing up. I mean I could give you some of my ideas to maybe re-sparkle your inspiration or become an editor.

[Chapter 13]

Progress.

[Slavenger Karl]

WaKe up for your time is now. We can't loose hope.

[Chapter 13]

An update.