Then I have the rest of Black Friday off, but I have to work that Saturday. Still, I feel like I'm getting off easy.I could use some advice...again. · 1:30am Nov 8th, 2017
So due to the opiod crises they have cut my mothers pain meds. My mother has fibromyalgia. For those who don't know, is nerve pain throughout the entire body. So imagine sprained or pulled muscles over your entire body. Because of the fibro, she's been on her meds for 20+ years. However they cut them in half already because they don't feel that she needs them, and they want to cut her off completely. She already has depression from the pain and being housebound. She's also been really sick lately. They've been trying to figure out what's going on, but she's not the...healthiest person in the world. She smokes almost 3 packs of cigarettes a day, lives off junk food, dr pepper and coffee. She's pre-diabetic, obese, and former drug addict and alcoholic. She's been (illegal) drug and alcohol free for 25 years, but she's been smoking for the past 27 years (she's 42). I'm getting really worried because she's getting worse, but she refuses to let me help her. There's more health issues, but that's the majority of what I'm willing to share. I just don't know what to do. She won't talk to anyone, she just sits on the couch all day watching t.v or on facebook. How can I help someone who doesn't want help? I need to do something or she won't be here much longer. We already have a high risk of cancer in our family, so that's where my mind keeps going. (Her sister, brother, both of her parents and grandmother all died from cancer.) I just can't figure out how to help her without her somehow furthering hurting herself or me and my Father.
Tell her that unless she wants to die and leave her husband and you behind, she should accept your help and also see if the doctor can restore the pain meds prescription.
Sorry, that's all I can do.
I don't really have any advice, but I am truly sorry for what you and your family are going through. Life has a funny way of throwing shitty situations at people who don't deserve it.
I don't really know how to help other than send a virtual hug and say that I hope it all works out in the end
When my mom got sick and she needed help but she didn't want help. I try everything I could to help until she decided to help herself out.
Try to be there for her and show how much you love and care for her.
i was gonna spout a bunch of psycho-bullshit but then i thought, hey, i'm on the internet. why not google that shit?
so one search later and a quick read of Wikipedia (screw the teachers, i'm not writing a research paper), i feel a bit more charitable. this isn't the most wide-spread problem in the world, but enough people have it to treat it seriously. its not psychosomatic or whatever.
so, here's what i gather: stress is a major factor, so don't yell at your mom or anything. you can maybe express a little disappointment in her lifestyle, that might help motivate her if she feels she has to prove something.
it'd help for me.it also says that, like i first thought, exercise is a good thing. especially swimming, so if there's an indoor pool in your area, try and drag your mom over there. the water helps deprive a person of the "pressure", as it was described, that leads to pain. if that's not an option, treadmill would be my second idea. the entry mentioned that cardio exercise is the best way to go. after that, trying to wean her of the junkfoods would be a good idea. how you do it depends on what kind of person your mom is. if she's a go-with-the-flow type, then just some encouragement might do. if she's contrarianlike me, then passingly mentioning that it would probably be impossible, not laying it on too thick mind you, goes back to that "something to prove" idea i mentioned above. you're trying to build her inner fire, so think of what the verbal equivalents to real fire-building techniques would be. sometimes you need to add kindling. sometimes you have to huff and puff so it gets oxygen. sometimes you need to throw some gasoline on top.the other thing is her smoking, that's really hard to deal with. like, she's already given up drugs and drinking. giving up smoking on top of that, well, that's definitely painful. it's possible, of course. my sister did it. i'm sure plenty of other people have. i think that you have to do a bit of triage her- do you want your mom to stop smoking or stop eating junkfood first? i'd go with the junkfood since that's more likely to interfere with the rest, but it's up to you and her.
i almost forgot, the page talked about sleep being difficult. which makes sense, all those blankets, the bed, that's a lot of body contact and the slightest wrinkle or movement would hurt. still, getting enough sleep is supposed to help overall, it'll also help counteract any depression.
last thing, the wiki mentioned other medicines. i'm guessing since your mom's on opioids, those others were either ineffective or else she can't take them for some reason (is she allergic? i know that can be a thing). still, i thought i'd bring it up because it was a thing.
i hope this all works out, you seem like a good person. i don't come across those that often.