Two Background Ponies Quickie: "Secrets and Pies" Aftermath · 10:22pm Oct 18th, 2017
At the local hayburger joint, a line had formed at the counter of rather confused ponies holding their recently-placed orders. Each one in turn was confused as they went up to the burger flipper in turn and showed him that all they had received was a hay patty with toppings.
All the burger flipper could do was shrug. "It's our new special, man. 'Naked Hayburgers'."
"Happy birthday, dear Orange Marmalade! Happy birthday to you!"
The elderly mare smiled softly as one of her younger relatives put a party hat on her head with the song's conclusion, the rest of her family gathered around the dining room table applauding. Soon after, her eldest daughter came in bearing what she expected to be a birthday cake with 80 individual candles on it.
Yet her face fell as soon as it was set down in front of her, as the rest of the table looked confused. In place of the cake was a colossal ice cream sundae...already half melted thanks to the 80 separate candles arranged on it.
"So have you had a chance to read it yet?"
"No, I haven't...oh! Pizza's here!"
Both stallions looked up happily as the pizzaria's waiter walked up with their order and set it down in their midst. Their happy faces turned to confusion on seeing it. It appeared to be nothing more than a circular dish of melted cheese with toppings spread on top of it. They both looked up to the waiter.
"Um...I think you forgot our crust."
"'Meatball Marinara's' is going carb-free this week." The waiter answered. "May I refill your iced tea?"
A gazebo-full of finely dressed stallions and mares rose up and stamped their hooves in applause as the new bride and groom finally made their way into the reception hall. Both of them blushed and grinned at the enthusiasm as they made their way around past their guests, friends, and family members to the large dining table up front, but made their way toward the wedding cake first so they could get their picture with the dessert intact.
However, as they neared, both of them slowed to a halt and gazed in puzzlement. The five-tiered wedding cake was nothing more than an arrangement of various candy bars with attractive white icing covering them. One of them took the moment to fall out when they arrived, causing half of one tier to slump.
Both turned and looked at the caterer in shock, and she could only helplessly shrug.
A group of excited colts and fillies grinned as they watched a pair of ponies dressed and painted up like clowns perform for them. At one point, one of the clowns motioned for a flower on his suspenders. The other clown looked in to smell, and immediately got a face-full of water spraying from it. The kids laughed in delight.
Frowning, the clown who had got doused reached behind him for a pie pan. Only instead of a cream pie, only a large chocolate block covered with whipped cream was in it. A moment later, he pasted the other clown in the face; causing the chocolate bar to shatter and spread fragments everywhere, including in his eyes and up his snout.
"GAH!" The clown screamed, breaking character and clutching his face while the other clown shrank back nervously. "You f***ing moron! I told you to microwave that f***ing thing so it'd be soft! Luna, that s*** went right in my f***ing eye!"
The younger ponies gaped in shock as their parents rushed out to cover their ears.
A certain green stallion and his blue friend were both looking a bit more irritable as their constantly worked their jaws against the plate of carrot sticks and celery with a cup of frosting for dipping in between them. As he munched away, the green stallion just kept shaking his head. The blue one, on the other hand, had paused to hold up a spherical vial with a white mist inside it.
"...So now these things are popping up all over Equestria. Who knew we actually exported magic vapors that got made into these things, you know? They say they could replace half the seashells in the country by next spring, Carl."
The green stallion was glaring off into space, still shaking his head as he kept chewing. "...It's not the same, Sam." He double-dipped his celery stick with even more frosting and tried again.
With a cartoonish bouncing in her step, a pink mare with a poofy mane happily hopped along and by the two.
"Hi Sam! Hi Carl!" She only made it a half-bounce more before halting in mid-air, then rewinded back one. Her eyes wheeled on the plate in between them. "Say...that's funny. You two are eating carrot sticks and celery sticks with frosting today! And I know for a fact that Incarlsistency only ever eats cookies when he's out chatting with Sam Listens-To-Carl's-Problems because he likes the sugar in something small and buttery, and Sam Listens-To-Carl's-Problems only ever eats cookies when he's out chatting with Incarlsistency because the loud crunch drowns him out when he gets going for too long!"
Sam grimaced. "The place is out of flour, Pinkie. The whole town is out."
"Yeah..." Carl added, leveling a glare on her. "It seems somepony apparently used up all the flour in town yesterday making a pie for every second of every minute of every hour of every day so that all of her bases would be covered when she continuously tried to make up reasons to give Rainbow Dash a pie to eat."
Sam joined in with the stare. The pink pony stared back a moment, then smirked and waved her hoof.
"Oh, that's silly! Nopony could have used up all the flour in town yesterday making a pie for every second of every minute of every hour of every day so that all of her bases would be covered when she continuously tried to make up reasons to give Rainbow Dash a pie to eat..." She smiled wide and hopped in the air. "Because I used up all the flour in town yesterday making a pie for every second of every minute of every hour of every day so that all of her bases would be covered when she continuously tried to make up reasons to give Rainbow Dash a pie to eat!" She began to bounce off. "See you at Dawn's birthday party this weekend, Sam! I'm making a birthday jello!"
Both stallions frowned and slumped in their seats.
Eh, the Skype potions may be flashy, but it's not like they're reusable.
In any case... yeah, all that flour has to come from somewhere. Even Pinkie would be hard-pressed to synthesize that much matter.
You're not the only one to notice the imminent flour shortage, but I think yours is better.
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You know...for a brief moment...I thought of having the waiter at the pizzaria ask: "Would you like a refill on your Berrytwist Sodapop?"
Then I told myself: "Dude...no."
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skype?
people still use that?