• Member Since 20th Sep, 2015
  • offline last seen Yesterday

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i used to be a really awful writer, and i probably still am, but i like to think i've at least learned enough to be a decent writer.

More Blog Posts72

  • 66 weeks
    6/10/2020: decided to take another potshot

    decided to try my hand at writing with ponies again. this is one of the best places to do such a thing, and here i have to do a lot less planning.

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    0 comments · 72 views
  • 99 weeks
    10/21/19: show's over

    show's over.

    but the community is not.

    as i pass into the next 'season' of my life, i won't be forgetting this place, for as much as i failed to find an audience or a niche, at least i learned to write.

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    0 comments · 108 views
  • 119 weeks
    update 3

    suddenly i find myself with a lot of time, so fuck it, i'm gonna ride this train until i can't.
    also i'm sad i ruined my 69 blog posts but whatever

    minor quality of life updates to my story and my profile, as well as my group

    0 comments · 87 views
  • 128 weeks
    update 2: regarding the insanity series

    so i uploaded the last chapter i will be writing of this series, because i had it finished and on hand but had not combed through it doubly so to check for any typos, so if there are any i won't be fixing them.

    and finally, to put to rest this series, i will go over the original, planned ending to I:FTL

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    0 comments · 120 views
  • 132 weeks
    update: i live!

    bruhs. all rise for the gamer national anthem.

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    0 comments · 141 views
Sep
15th
2017

Rabid Retard Complains Again About Things He Shouldn't Be Complaining About! · 3:31am Sep 15th, 2017

The one thing any good author needs is a critical audience. An audience that doesn't hesitate to be rude or uncaring about others' feelings, easily pointing out flaws with their stories and demanding it changed.

I want that audience. Many authors get that kind of audience, but don't want it. I want an audience that actually speaks to me, even if it is in hateful words and comments! But I still want actual criticism, as well. Take Hamster_Master for example. A retarded troll. This isn't the way criticism works. Of course a HiE isn't original! Of course my ideas aren't original! I'm a fledgeling shitlord writer, I'm trying but failing to do my job because of my audience. Or, lack thereof.

I have no options to increase this audience, except trying to decrease the rating so I can get it into A for Effort. Of course, this would miss out on plenty of planned opportunities for character development in specifically the fifth and seventeenth acts.

So. Would you rather help me or hate me because I just began trying to write? Because I actually took time out of my own life to try and write stories for the people that enjoy my brain shits before. I missed out on important family events for just a few more views or likes. Why? Because I feel worthless, often. I try to do things with my life, but I'm getting no where fast and I can barely do anything to change it. I want to EARN the silence of the critics, not have it from the beginning! I'd rather have hundreds of dislikes rather than likes, if it only meant people commented and told me what I need to work on and what I did wrong!

No, I don't care if people dislike my stories. But when they don't tell me why, it infuriates me. It makes me feel inadequate and makes me feel useless for not being able to do anything right. I've struggled with fucking depression my entire life, a genetic disease, and so much more bullshit that I honestly wish I could escape.

Maybe I'm just complaining to nothing. Maybe I'm complaining to people who don't give a shit about me. But I really don't care. Because who cares about anyone except the big authors who pump out stories weekly to sate their audience of mindless worshipers?
I've been told "that's life pal" before, but that doesn't tell me shit.

Maybe it's because I'm a straight white male. Maybe it's because of the culture of retarded feminazis we live in. I don't know, but I most certainly do care. Maybe I just don't know what to do anymore.

You know what? How about I go take a break. A very long break. A very, very long break. One I might not come back from. I'm not committing suicide, I'm just going to quit. I'm angry, stupid, and I can't deal with my emotion because I'm socially awkward and I act like a badass online to make myself feel better. I make stupid jokes just to laugh at others' pain so I don't focus at my own.

So here I stand, the most selfish piece of garbage in the world. Go on, throw tomatoes or whatever shit you want at me. It'll only encourage me further. Because I really do care, even when I say I don't. Because I just had a breakdown from all the stress piled onto me over the internet. Because I just typed a blog longer than my pathetic genitalia.

Goodbye.

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