Why Am I Doing This (Part 2) · 9:30pm Jul 12th, 2017

Well, hi! It looks like I'm back with more stuff to say about a certain thing called 'Bride of Discord'. You might want to read my last blog to understand what's been happening, and if you have, here's the next three chapters.

EBride of Discord

Discord returns and will only relieve Equestria of his havoc in exchange for a bride.

DisneyFanatic23 · 65k words · 1,957 59 · 30k views

Chapter Four: Shit This is Almost Creepy At Times

The fourth chapter opens with a paragraph that's kind of a bullet point list of what Discord does to Equestria and not much more. Blink, and all of Equestria is now at his whim. It feels cheap how something important to the plot and Discord's character are just tossed around like that. I'd be thrilled to read about how he transforms Equestria and how that will affect the ponies in it... and of course Fluttershy. The fears that she has been having nightmares about for three years have finally come true!

Reactions to this would've been pretty great, but instead we just leave off with the mane six still being in hiding and such. This is supposed to be a drama, and it's not.
Well, maybe not yet?

(Note: Fluttershy's nightmares were never suggested or presented in a way that makes them appear to be anything but constant. I could understand them being on and off, and being contributing factors to her depression, but if they were constant - something that seems to be suggested - she'd be going nuts. She isn't an age old alicorn princess or anything special when it comes to dreams. She's a small pegasus with a sensitive heart and is easily scared. There's also the matter of Luna's dreamwalking. I think it was canon around/during/after this was written. The mane six are clearly important to the princesses and constant nightmares... somepony like Fluttershy probably does need her guidance. Giving a reason why Luna isn't doing what appears to be her job would've been nice.)

Discord decides to go off and personally mess with ponies now. He happens across Big Mac and Cheerliee having a date somewhere on Sweet Apple Acres property. He scoffs at their talk and interactions and it is revealed that Discord has a devil on his shoulder - a mini-Discord that echoes himself - which is pretty clever.

Discord scorns the minor affection that Big Mac and Cheers (gonna call her that cause I can) that the two are showing one another, and demonstrates that he rejects the idea of having that for himself as he pulls silly pranks on them from a cloud. It all seems pretty in character with how he's been portrayed so far and makes sense. The talk between Mac and Cheers is a toned down version of their Hearts and Hooves day talk, so it makes even more sense to why Discord might gag.

Then, as he watches them, he starts to have a random change of heart-like moment.

"Sickening, isn't it?" his shoulder devil gagged.
He stared down at the couple as they settled in an embrace and looked into each other's eyes. He let out a longing sigh. "Yeah. Sickening."
"You don't sound so convinced."
"Why do you suppose no pony's looked at us that way?"
"We're too magnificent for such sap!"

This doesn't seem to fit with him at all. Maybe if he communicated this later in the story in the same way a pouty/spoiled child would - something that would suit Discord very well - I could understand this... if it wasn't already made clear that Discord doesn't seem to understand what exactly love and affection are in the first place. It happens in this same scene and chapter too... and then this does.
He finally decides to go back to Canterlot and strike a deal with the Mane 6, where he offers to set the princesses (including Cady and her unborn foal) free if they:

1) The Mane 6 must promise not to use the Elements of Harmony against Discord.

2) Discord must be given his own corner of Equestria to do chaos shit in.

And the last one is...

3) A bride who is a pony and willing.

This is where things get weird. He goes from mentioning the previous scene with Big Mac and Cheers to being hostile towards the CMC to...

"It's only natural that I would feel the need for companionship. Besides, if I'm going to retire, I might as well settle down and raise a family and blah, blah, blah."

What.

Why and how is it natural? Why has this never come up before? Why is he suddenly thinking about 'retirement' when he had no clear intention of doing so at the start of the story? Why is he suddenly talking about actively raising a family?

Why, why, why?

...It's not really answered. At all.

However, I will point out this:

Fluttershy had been watching the entire scene with uncertainty. She did not trust Discord, but her friends were not giving him a chance to talk. With this in mind, she made a bold move and flew between Discord and her friends.
"Twilight!" she exclaimed. "I'm surprised at you! You of all ponies!"
"Fluttershy," Twilight said slowly.
"Aren't you the one who says we should put reason before judgment? Discord may be an evil monster who doesn't deserve our trust..."
"I'm right here, you know!" the draconequus waved.
"But we should at least give him a chance to explain himself!"

Fluttershy, who has been having nightmares constantly about Discord and is terrified of him... is the one that suggests he be allowed to speak when all the other main 6 choose to be more hostile, and rightly so.

She goes from being whimpering and frightened to bold in a way that doesn't make sense. Out of everypony, she should be the most afraid of him... and she isn't.

There isn't a reason given.

All in all, Discord's been pretty creepy so far. We're not supposed to think that about him. He's supposed to be some kind of antihero and yet, here he is, clearly put in a position where we are supposed to feel bad for him or something? It's clearly the author's intent to make them - the characters - sympathetic first and everything else second. It isn't working.

He's literally demanding that he have an arranged marriage.

It's also impossible for the mare in question to come freely because this is what is called 'coercion'.

Rarity scoffed. "Who would be willing to marry you?!"
"I don't know. Any of you mares interested?"
They all glared at him. Rainbow stuck her tongue out.
"No pony?" He looked over at the yellow pegasus. "What about you, Fluttershy?"
She let out a small whimper. Before she could say anything, Twilight moved between them.

Also, Fluttershy is signaled out from the very start. This just feels creepy.

Chapter Five: Coercion in Spades

...Except, this story treats it as normal.

"But we can't just hand some pony over to be his wife!" Rarity exclaimed. "We might as well be making a sacrifice to the Devil!"

There are a lot of random references to human religion in here in ways that feel weird.

So far, everything in this story only serves to point at something wrong with Discord/Fluttershy/the set up, and instead it isn't treated like that at all.

Fluttershy had been silent the entire time. She couldn't get over the fact that Discord had been there. The way he had spoken to her, touched her, looked at her, it gave her the shivers. She told herself she was being paranoid, but if that was the case, why did he seem to single her out?

Stuff like this shouldn't be in a good romance story. This is how you set up Discord as a creepy antagonist, not a love interest. The way this is presented seriously needs a ton of work.

And yes, why did he single her out there?

Yeah, I know I'm not gonna get an answer.

A good romance story should be developing both of these characters in their relationship. This isn't really doing either.

But, that's not all! Discord isn't just super creepy to Fluttershy and also creepy to the main 6, he's creepy to the Princesses too!

I'm not even kidding.

He's been holding them hostage and all that jazz and literally asks any of them (yes, including Cady) if they'd like to marry him.
And later when he talks to the main 6:

"Any of you. I don't care which one, but if some pony doesn't come forward soon, I will just have to make the decision myself. How about I give you...?" He tapped his chin. "Three days?"

...He's now offering to kidnap/brainwash/need I add more? whoever he wants. Congrats, and once again, this isn't how you introduce a character that I'm supposed to see in the same good light that you've forcibly cast over him. These behaviors are all vices or flaws, and they're all that's been shown of him.

I don't understand his motives, and if there's a deeper meaning to them. His character is underdeveloped and...

Gah, this combination of things is only bringing down the story. One or two of these I could understand... but this?

Urgh.

As this chapter goes on, the main 6 debate among themselves who to send... so, they're basically pulling straws now to see who gets eaten.

Whelp.

It was happening again. It was dark, and she was in his arms. His lion fingers were running through her mane. Even though she knew this was a dream, it sent chills up her spine.
"Why won't you go away?" she squeaked.
Her captor's cackle echoed in the darkness. "My dear, don't you understand? I'm in your mind because you keep me here."
"Well, I don't want you here! Go away!"
He chuckled and soon his face was inches away from hers. "What are you waiting for, my dear? You know what you have to do. You know I favor you over the others. So do it."
"No!" She tried to struggle out of his grasp. "I don't...I don't..."
He whispered into her ear. "If you don't do it, who will?"
Fluttershy woke with a start. She put her hoof to her head and whimpered. I can't do it, she thought. I just can't! What will the others think?

...Now Fluttershy's creepy dreams are creepier! The implications of it just serve to sink the ship.

Fluttershy is now talking with AJ about this whole ordeal and how she's thinking about going. Applejack freaks out. I don't blame her.

The friendshipping between them is cute. Why couldn't this be a cute AppleShy story? I dunno.

They decide to go see Zecora to seek her advice, which is actually a smart choice.

Chapter Six: Goddamn Tea

So now they're at Zecora's and this happens:

"But look!" Zecora showed the cup to Fluttershy and pointed to a picture of the sun that was made by the leaves. "In your future, I also see great happiness, and this is if you go with the draconequus."
"What?!" The southern pony grabbed the tea-cup. "How could she possibly be happy with Discord?!"
"He may not be an angel from above, but perhaps all Discord needs is some love."
"Love?! That varmint? Now I know you're makin' this up!"
"You mean..." Fluttershy stammered. "He just wants some pony to love him?"
Zecora shrugged. "I could be mistaken, but I assure you if this path were taken, no harm will be brought upon you. Yet it could be that Discord is unhappy too."

...There's a lot of good ways to use this kind of thing. This isn't one of them. Instead, the ship is now destined. Any sense of conflict is gone. Character growth is more or less shot because destiny got shoehorned in, and in a way that wasn't fun, intriguing, or anything else.

One thing about a good story is that it is often aware of its own issues and can address them - or at least the writer is - but this story doesn't seem to tackle its flaws at all.

The southern pony glanced around at the mess of broken bottles and turned over furniture. "Yeah, I can see that. I'm sure you heard of his...demands?"

Also, don't refer to to Applejack like this. 'Southern' would refer to the American South, which isn't where Applejack is from. Depending on what the author's Equestria looks like, AJ will most likely be from central Equestria, but that isn't something I don't know about her.

This is just LUS.

As you might guess, Fluttershy actually agrees to go with Discord, much to the better advice of her friends.

...Yeah.

There's a lot of ways to reform a villain. There's a lot of ways to ship them. There's ways to do both in the same story.

Without stating too much of what I already have again, I don't feel that this is a good way to do this.

I also don't like the dynamic this story gives Discord and Fluttershy. It's really unhealthy, and this is never addressed.

Fluttershy is meek and powerless. She's frightened, simpering, easy to hurt and submissive. She's been just short of forced into this union - 'for eternity' as the story says, but how that's gonna work out with Fluttershy being mortal, I don't know - and she has no help, no way to see her friends, or contact with the outside world. She's meek and timid and thinks that Discord can be changed. The only thing that gives her any purpose in this story is beauty and a very misplaced sense of kindness.

Discord is a powerful being that is demigod-like at the very least. He's ordered this 'bride' to be his by holding the world hostage. Even if he was bluffing, he still coerced her either way. He's established to be capable of hurting Fluttershy, has no given limit to his power of even one that's suggested. He bullies every other character to appear so far and his background is unknown. He has no prior dynamic with her or other relationships - anything. His motives are shady. He's locking Fluttershy up in his new castle and is domineering. His purpose in this story is to be shipped with Fluttershy.

The author wants me to ship an abusive relationship.

Now, hold on. I'm aware that he hasn't hit her - you don't need that to be an abusive relationship. There's emotional and psychological abuse too, and to some extent, that's happening right here.

This story is based off of Beauty and the Beast, as well as the archetype that evolved from the romance those folktales portrayed.
It doesn't do a very good job.

(Note: One of the reasons a Discord ship like Twicord or Dislestia is more welcome in my library is because of how they can find a middle ground easier with things like interests and the fact that both Twilight and Celestia aren't going to be walked all over. With those two, it could be far more of an equal partnership, which ships like Flutterdash and Fluttercord don't have.)

In most of the original folktales, the Beauty character wasn't sold into marriage or unwilling to go to the castle. She was usually a capable young lady who most notably had a higher than average intelligence, a love of books, and in most versions that I recall, rode horses. She was usually a bit plain in appearance - the reason she was called 'Beauty' if that was actually her name, given or otherwise, usually had a combination of meanings for each incarnation:

1) She was actually pretty, but usually not grandly so. It was usually kind of subtle. Her personality was kinda the typical joke about burnette women... so the 'Beast' in question just had a type, I guess. Dunno. I could go on about folktales for a while.

2) She had a nice personality, and that carried over to how she appeared: things like her smile and nature would usually be what made her feel pretty.

3) She had a good spirit. Really, that's it.

4) She was smart - so a 'beauty comes from within' kinda cliche.

5) She was actually plain af and it was ironic.

6) Humans are superficial creatures.

All these aren't really applicable to this story's Fluttershy. She isn't a very capable or plucky character, and she isn't levelheaded or quirky. She's not very smart.

As for how the Beauty usually ended up in the castle of the 'Beast'? The story usually went with her father embarking on a long trip, and on his way home, he got lost/caught in the weather/both and ended up stumbling across the castle that the Beast was in.

(Note: I have never seen a B&B rendition where the girl had both parents. Usually, her mother died very young or was said to be out of the picture. So it was up to her and her sisters/brothers - if she had any - to manage things. She was often shown to be the closest to the father - a real daddy's girl, hence the next part.)

Her father would stay the night in this creepy ass castle and take something small from it - often a rose - as a gift for his daughter. Or he'd just trespass. It varies.

The Beast would then get pissed that some guy literally just broke in and helped himself like a complete dingus so he'd get mad and tell him that he'd have to be his prisoner for life and a lot of unethical shit, okay?

That's when Dadguy mentioned his family and how he had to go back to him because he usually left on this magical trip in all the stories when the Beauty girl was roughly teenaged or a young adult.

So then stuff varied. Dadguy would get pressured into having to send someone else in his place (his children) and be unable to tell them of the deal, or certain details of it. Things like that.

The Beauty character always volunteered. That's right, unlike Fluttershy, she was brave. She'd go to the castle and stay there. Pretty much all the grounds where hers to explore. The marriage thing never came up until later in the story.

Out of all the strange af folktales out there, most versions of Beauty and the Beast made a surprising amount of sense.

So that was how the Beauty character compares to Fluttershy. If I wanted to go for personality/role/etc. and compare an MLP character to the usual Beauty protagonist, I'd honestly say that Apple Bloom would be the most fitting. If you're leaning toward the Disney version, Twilight Sparkle makes sense, but that's overdone.

Now that I've finished one half of my profanity-laced essay on folktales, I should probably explain the second part.

The Beast was more or less Discord inverted in here. His backstory was rather amusing in almost all the tales... and was usually one of the few universal aspects of the tale.

He was an asshole. A rich asshole.

He was a young rich asshole of some kind and lived in a castle. Basically, he'd be that one smug fuck who never had to work for anything and just inherited a whole lotta real nice shit.

So one day, a hobo knocked on his door when it was raining. She asked if she could just sorta have some shelter and chill for the night so she wouldn't have to get rained on. It wasn't always rain, but she was filthy and shit. This guy took one look at her.
And then he told her to fuck off.

So she cursed at him because she was a bitch who was a witch in disguise and told him that he'd remain a beast - he got a free transformation into a furry, if you wanna see it like that - unless he wasn't a selfish and unlovable dick.

So the Beast now had to have someone genuinely love him to break a curse. Some tales gave him a life line, other times it was indefinite and he'd be weirdly ageless.

But his personality was that of a selfish fuck who was very private, somber, and reclusive. He could be hostile or imposing, but not outright violent towards other characters. He usually seemed very introverted and educated.

Unlike Discord, he wasn't creepy. He was always given an air of mystery. He was feared because he was strange, but not because he was a flipping chaos monster who was going to steal your Element Bearers while you slept.

If I was to do the same with 'pick an MLP character for this' I'd pick Blueblood, I guess. Unless you want the Disney version, then I have no goddamn clue.

This means that I've created the BlueBloom ship.

Can someone write that now?

This story is based on the legend. Based on. However, there's enough references and quotes from the Disney version that pop up that it could be marked as a crossover. However, this story leaves out a lot of elements of the folklore that would've improved the story presented in here and certainly would've made the creepiness less of a problem.

Conclusion Thus Far: Ten bucks says there's gonna be Stockholm's Syndrome involved and if you drink tea, the universe will have an abusive relationship waiting for you.