*Coughs dust* H-hey guys · 5:29pm Jun 21st, 2017
Howdy howdy~
As I've sadly had to start these things lately; long time no see.
I'm still kicking around guys, just not really writing anymore atm. Oh I've got TONS of ideas; I still hold this show very close to my heart and constantly have it on my mind in one form of another. The fact of the matter is that I sadly do not have the time anymore to type... Someday I might! Someday I hope that I can stop having panic attacks about every little thing and simply enjoy living my life but, well, I think that'll still be awhile.
Sadly I have more bad news, and I'm sorry to say that it's been a long time coming. I've been lying to myself about it for the longest time, and I feel that I've strung you all along with me as a result. So, let's make it official...
"If you ain't got anything nice to say..." is cancelled.
It was not an easy decision to make. Several of my stories are currently on a hiatus already, some having been on there longer then "If.." However, while I see myself returning to the worlds and characters of The Poisoned Barb and, yes, even A Cog in the Machine, I don't think I could ever properly return to "If..."
"If..." was a story I started as a spur of the moment experiment back during the waiting period between season's four and five. It was an attempt of mine to offset the anger I was feeling at the time about my frustrating situations (reaching the end of my education without a career in place, toxic roommate, gender confusion which still won't straighten itself even to this day... take your pick) by channeling it into an art form. I needed a mouthpiece for my frustration, one who was ironically quite like me.
Enter Big Mac.
Before season five, Big Mac was still a rather unknown character. We knew very little about him in comparison to the rest of his clan. We as a fandom did what we always do with silent background characters and gave him a voice. Said voice was often times our own, I realized at the time, so I felt it made sense to use him to vent some frustrations of my own. A lot of you felt the same and, almost literally over night, "If..." became a hit. Seeing your love for my work spurred me on to go bigger and badder with each rising chapter... but I eventually made mistakes. Mistakes that required fixing and reorganizing in order to reach the heartfelt ending that I had in mind. After months of working on this single story I decided to take a little break and tackle the finale with renewed vigor.
During that time, season 5 went on it's marry way and produced Brotherhooves Social without a care in the world.
It was a beautiful episode in a season of beautiful episodes. It gave us a new look at Big Mac's character, one that didn't rely on the nasty tactics I was employing to make it work. While the episode didn't make me want to QUIT my interpretation at all, it did make me rethink a lot of things about myself. "If..." want on a official hiatus after that as I went on to focus on my other stories and, more importantly, my future.
Two years and seasons later the status remained, until today. Those watching episodes early this season due to weird scheduling may not need me to say anything else but I will spell it out clearly for everyone else.
I don't want to hurt these characters anymore.
I don't want to hurt the characters who I've grown to love even closer these past few season. I don't want to break those who have helped me through some very dark times in my life, all under the hateful mantra of "breaking them makes them grow back stronger." I wished to batter these ponies down to vulnerable places in the hopes of making them face their flaws and overcome them, because I wished to do the same myself. "The show's not going to do it," I thought. "Might as well be the one."
And for the most part I was right; the show DIDN'T do that.
It did it better.
The characters grew where I wanted them to grow through less brutal methods. They grew naturally and, in the case of Big Mac, showed us sides of themselves that we never knew existed all along but makes perfect sense in hindsight.
I guess what I'm trying to say is "If you ain't got anything nice to say... then that's okay."
With a heavy heart I close the curtains on this story, but I will encourage each and every one of you to insert your own ending in it's place. Perhaps your own vision will be even better then my own.
Well... I suppose that's all for now. I wish you all luck in your dreams and endeavors, because I know you'll wish the same in mine. That's just the kind of people we are at our core.
I don't need any stupid poison joke to know that ^_^
-Derply
p.s. new icon is courtesy of this neat place. Check it out!
Almost didn't recognize you there. Sorry to hear things are still rough for you, and it’s always sad to hear about a story being cancelled. I know from personal experience that writing is more often than not something that you have to make time for rather than just sit and wait for it to find you, but at the same time I also know that is also easier said than done. At any rate I will say that my previous offer to help is still valid, even if it's just to help nudge you back into the swing of it.
And if not, as always, best of luck.
Aww. Well, I suppose I shouldnt be quite too disappointed.
I still like the story, but I understand if you're no longer feeling it, both from a difficulty to write at all, and from a story place, too.
As always, I hope you're doing well and do better if you're not.
This is the single best cancellation of a story I've ever seen. This, in and of itself, forms a perfect conclusion to the story to me.
As someone with gender issues of there own, I say take your time Derply. We'll still be here when you're ready
I don't see myself completely leaving this place anytime soon, and I use the same username anywhere. If and when you decide to come back and write some more contact me and I'll gladly hop in and help out again. I probably edited or proofread dozens of stories but yours was always a personal favorite.
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Thanks for always offering man. I hope that one day I can give you some fun work to play with. For no though, do take it easy ^_^
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Awww. Thank you for your understanding. I'm glad that you still find enjoyment in the story even without a proper ending. Guess they're telling the truth about it being all about the journey, not the destination.
Thank you for reading
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May both our lives make sense someday!
Thank you
Glad you're still alive!
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Thanks for sticking around this long! I hope you're doing well yourself?
I'm pretty late to this blog post, but I wanted to say that you gave a lovely explanation as to why you canceled this story, and I really appreciate the sentiment behind it. I'm going to move "If You Ain't Got Anything Nice To Say" from my tracking folder to my read it later folder, to re-enjoy before unfollowing it. Thank you for all the work you put into it!
PLEASE do whatever you're going to do for Cog in the Machine. I loved that story back in the day, and I will re-read the fuck out of it if you say you'll actually do something on it.
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Back in the day? It wasn't THAT long ago was i- (Sees that the website has it listed as having first gone up in 2012) SWEET JEBUS IT'S BEEN THAT LONG?! Wow time flies...
... I still have a strong connection to that story, and I'm very aware of its loyal following still waiting around for it to continue. I still honestly believe that I will return to finish it someday too, even as a lot of my original plans for it are currently being incorporated into my other stories. I honestly don't know when that will be; perhaps I'll get nostalgic over it one day and that'll get the ball rolling again like it did for The Poisoned Barb. I really can't predict these things.
Either way, I thank you for still sticking around after all this time