Random Ramblings CLXXXVI · 12:30pm May 23rd, 2017
IN WHICH I AM SURPRISED
I'd like to take this opportunity to extend a warm welcome and thanks to my new followers I've gained over the past couple of weeks. Welcome to my asylum; I hope you enjoy the ride.
The reception to Sasha has thus far been much better than I expected. Coffee congratulated me on making the Featured list, which confused me as I didn't see it… until I unchecked the "View Mature" box – he filters out M-rated stories; I don't – then I found it at about No.6 on the list. So… yay me. I suppose one of the things helping Sasha is that it's not a sequel to anything; readers can go in having seen only EQG1 and completely understand the story. From there, I can try to hook them into the Recovery Arc and Burritoverse. Mwahahahaha! Though I have a hunch the vast majority of the story's readers thus far are longtime followers who look forward to any activity from me. No complaints here; I'm happy anyone reads my stuff at all!
Anyway, for those of you unfamiliar with my blogging style (y'all are probably sick of me by now), I often talk and/or complain about the writing process itself, and have been known to post rejected bits of story. This is one of those times. Follow me past the jump.
Okay, so one of the things I mentioned in my latest Author's Notes is that, although I loved the story and enjoyed writing it, it was technically difficult to square it with the 18 months - nine stories' worth - of continuity I had already established. The characters were thus constrained such that their actions and dialogue in the next chronological story, Highs & Lows (written March 2015), had to make sense for how they acted and spoke in Sasha and vice versa. Did I succeed? Probably not. But at least I tried.
However, I almost wrote myself into a trainwreck. What follows is the original conversation between Sunset and Rarity in the fabric room. I stopped writing, cut it, and rewrote it because Rarity came off so cruel and unforgiving that it would be too much of a leap to get her to sympathize with Sunset enough by the end of the story. I've included the beginning of the dialogue, which I kept, to provide context.
"You know, Sunset, the only reason I'm even allowing myself to be in the same room with you is that Twilight asked the five of us to give you a chance and be your friends. I don't know how the others feel, but that is quite a tall order for me," Rarity said matter-of-factly.
"I know."
"It's taking every ounce of self-control I have to not scream at you or strangle you right now."
"I know."
"To be absolutely honest, I've hated you for years."
"I know. I deserve it."
<<cut happens after this point>>
"So then how do you propose to atone for everything you've done? Not just to me, but to everyone else?"
Sunset slowly turned her head to face Rarity, her aquamarine eyes noticeably watery. "I don't think I can, no matter how much I might want to."
Rarity narrowed her eyes. "You mean you have nothing to say to me at all? After three years, not a word?"
Sunset maintained her glum expression, although her voice gained more emotion. "What do you want me to say, Rarity? You want me to apologize for sabotaging your social life your freshman year? If I do, will you even believe me? Would you believe I've been playing those three weeks over and over in my mind ever since you all pulled me out of that hole, wishing I had never been so arrogant?"
"That could be a start," Rarity snipped.
I think the final conversation in the publicly available story is a massive improvement. This is far from the first time I've cut dialogue or narration because it didn't work. That's just a side effect of the writing process.
Well, that's all I have for now. Peace out!
Do you know what's funny?
I have never been able to sit through the entirety of EqG 1.
So, logically speaking, I should understand this the least out of all of your stories.
I think you made a very good choice, as a Rarity with that much attitude just doesn't work for me. I wouldn't expect her to immediate accept and forgive Sunset but she does quickly see the sincerity and is willing to give it a try. This story makes the whole arc come together even more and I thank you for writing it.
4544092 - I sat through EQG1 once. I'm not sure I could do it again. When it came out, I rated it "passable" or "meh". I liked the songs and loved Sunny (the IDW prequel comic played a big part in that), but that's about it. Rainbow Rocks, though, I've watched multiple times.
4544292 - You're very welcome. I'm so glad you liked the story.
You can probably tell by that snippet that I wrote myself into a corner, realized it, and then had to figure out how to fix it. Also, Sunset's cut dialogue is repetitive to later (chronologically) stories in the arc, basically laying too much of herself out there when the right thing to do, which I did in the final edit, was hold back.