I Could Use Your Opinion on Something... · 2:43am May 16th, 2017
Good evening, everyone. I have a short update and then I have something I'd like to get your feedback on if I may.
First, my newly posted Cadence one-shot "A Restless Night with Cadence" has done pretty well. I was pleased with the results. In fact it made quite a few readers' days.
For those of you eager to hear about Twilight's story "For Whom She Sparkles", I'm very happy to announce that I finished the rough draft of chapter 5 today and am very pleased with how it turned out. There was quite a bit that took place in this chapter, that's why in addition to being delayed by a number of personal matters outside of my writing, I wanted to make sure things played out to my satisfaction. And given that chapter 5 is currently at a little over 11,000 words. I'm seriously thinking of breaking it into two chapters. One would be a little over 6,000 words and the other would be closer to 5,000 words. I know that in the past some have expressed concern regarding chapters with lengths exceeding 10,000 words. And it can be a trial for me as well. Longer chapters take more time to edit. So, I'm giving that careful thought. But also keeping in mind how long its been since my last update for Twilight's story, I just may leave it as is. Any thoughts you might have would be greatly appreciated.
One last thing for an update, I should also have chapter 3 of Cherish Heart's (Button's Mom's) story "Since You Came Along" edited before too much longer. Alas the chaos following my dad's passing derailed my progress there but now that I'm working on my projects more regularly, I should have that ready soon.
Oh and I will also be getting back to Jeanne's story as well. Chapter 5 only needs a little more work before it'll be ready to edit and finally post.
Now one last thing I wanted to do was get your opinion on something. After asking for you all to share your thoughts regarding 2nd person stories against 3rd person stories a while back. I was happy to get a nice mix of replies, and a number seemed to support my writing either type, many of you have enjoyed both styles when I write my stories. So keeping that in mind, I had to admit to myself that I do enjoy writing second person stories. Anyway in addition to the short one-shot I just posted about Princess Cadence, I have another considerably longer one I drafted about her. But I wanted to ask what your thoughts are regarding the jobs I've given the human character in my past 2nd person stories? Are there ones you like more or less, or doesn't it really matter, you're just happy to see what I roll out with? Any feedback would be helpful and greatly appreciated. I know it's ultimately up to me, but as my treasured readers, I enjoy knowing what you think as well. =D And there is still going to be some time till I finish editing this new Cadence x Human tale.
Have a good one and thank you all for your support and patience!
- Jaydex
PS: Have some Cadence art! <3
Jay, you know I've loved what you have been writing since early 2012, heck I had a book mark for your page because I didn't have a FiMFiction account. So go with what you feel my friend, I trust your judgement. I always have and always will.
I'll go with the 2nd pic of Princess cadence
I would say that dividing the chapter into a two parter is a good idea. It's going to save both you and your editor some trouble. and for 2nd. and third person narratives either is fine really.
Well Jadex, while I have enjoyed your stories and have voiced my opinion/criticized several of them. I would say that many of the jobs which you give to your human protagonist seem to complement the pony they eventually court. So for the princesses, the human typically has some type of government administration type of job. Or they join the guard, and then get assigned as a personal guard to whichever princess they're seeing. Or like how for your Jeanne story, your human joins a blacksmithing profession, while Jeanne, is a member of the Royal Guards.
If you wish to continue placing your human in jobs which favor the pony they end up courting or having relations with, then you may continue to put your human protagonists in jobs which would give them more time with their pony they're sweet on. However, for many humans, we would usually have a preexisting profession prior to arriving in Equestria. Some may loathe their jobs, because they're in a profession they loathe. Some may feel ambivalent about their jobs, that even though it isn't a job that they're passionate about, at least they get paid and is better than being unemployed. There may be yet fewer who actually like their job, because it is in a profession which they enjoy working in.
While with those who dislike or feel ambivalent about their jobs may see Equestria's job market as an opportunity for employment in an occupation they enjoy, it's going to take time to develop the skill and knowledge to work in whatever profession that that human decides to seek employment/employ themselves in. What about the humans who enjoy the occupations in which they're already employed? They've spent many hours learning and developing the skills required of their occupation. Why would they just enter a new occupation for which they have no passion for or spent the time to develop the skill and knowledge needed to excel in that profession?
I guess what I'm trying to say is that it seems as though the occupations which you have placed your humans in, afford them greater opportunity to develop their relationships with their mare while 'on the clock.' However, most relationships romantic or otherwise are developed outside of the workplace. And most of them aren't going to be in the same occupations as their significant other.
So, I would encourage you to employ your human in an occupation which wouldn't facilitate the development his relationship with the mare he's pursuing/being pursued by. So, instead of governance, perhaps the princess' human works as a caterer or a lumberjack or a trader/merchant.
So that is my thoughts regarding your humans, their occupations and the direction which I would like to see your future human/pony relationships and the human's occupation while living in Equestria.
4534336
Thank you for the feedback. It's appreciated.
4534360
Thank you, my friend. And I remember you mentioning bookmarking my user page before you had an account on here. It still makes me smile to this day.
4534394
Excellent choice!
4534495
And I'm even happier that I already came up with a potential breaking point where I can make the chapter into two smaller ones, since this was something I was considering. 
That's just what I was thinking, thank you for offering your input.
4534666
If I recall correctly, you were the one that pointed out in my alicorn Twilight story "She Will Always Be Your Twilight" a way I could have improved the one castle maid, Merry Way's rapport with the human by using examples to show they know each other to better flesh out their characters.
Like the others that commented above, you've offered some helpful insights. Mostly it seems that it's as I suspected. Many of you are fine with how I've given the human a job that seems to match their pony or compliments their skills from Earth or at least lets them do something they didn't find as rewarding on Earth but find immensely rewarding in Equestria. I appreciate your insights, much as I have appreciated your feedback/critique on my past works.
I look forward to your Cadence fics, not to mention making an actual start on Twilight's and particularly Jeanne's as well.
(they're the only three here, the fourth whom I've never liked is still not for me)
About jobs in 2nd person, I'm happy with whatever.
4535136 That's great, it'll save you a lot of trouble in the long run.