Paul's Thursday Reviews LXIV · 12:42am Feb 17th, 2017
Well, the crazy week of reading is over. Consider me relaxed! It was a frustrating time, but altogether more productive than I expected in the writing front. And fruitful for helping me catch up with where I need to be reading-wise.
I'm curious. I completely bypassed Legend of the Everfree, more due to being unable to find a full copy of it than disinterest, and now the movie is ruling the newsfeeds. Anyone else feel like that new cat character is going to be an eyesore? And why the heck do the characters have to go underwater to deal with a storm king? Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that seaponies are finally going to be a canonical thing. It just seems like there's a disconnect here.
I think right now I'm more 'meh' about the upcoming movie than anything else. Ignoring seaponies, the only thing that's stirred me at all is that the guy who plays the storm king seems to always play bad guys. I mean, the moment I heard Liev Schrieber was being cast I knew he'd be the villain.
How about you guys and gals? Any real interest in this upcoming potential fiasco?
Alright, let's have some reviews. We got a pretty good pool today, including (drum roll please) my last re-read!
Stories for This Week:
Of the Hive by Law Abiding Pony
Friend and Foe by Benman
Wizards, Fools, and Foals by FanOfMostEverything
Below by Thought Prism
Movements of Fire and Shadow by Inquisitor M
I'd Kiss Her by Fire Gazer the Alchemist
Total Word Count: 108,044
Rating System
Why Haven't You Read These Yet?: 1
Pretty Good: 5
Worth It: 0
Needs Work: 0
None: 0
Of the Hive
80,662 Words
By Law Abiding Pony
This series first caught my attention with the story Culling of the Hives back when it was making the rounds on the featured list. Of course, I wasn’t about to start so late in, so I promptly located the original, and here we are. Twilight becoming/being a changeling is about as common and easy a concept as Celestia being/becoming a changeling, but for whatever reason I decided I’d give this one a go. It didn’t turn out like I expected.
In most scenarios I’ve seen, Twilight either was a changeling all along or is turned into one against her will. This story takes a different route. In it, we learn of a hive separate from Chrysalis’s, ruled by a more harmony-minded queen named Cadista. Fearing that Chrysalis’s attempted invasion of Equestria will paint all changelings as villains in the eyes of ponies – and thereby making love collection extremely difficult – Cadista decides to pursue open diplomatic ties with Equestria in order to stop the problem before it gets out of control. Twilight, in an effort to aid in the peace process, volunteers to go to Cadista’s hive as an ambassador and learn more about changeling culture. But the trip doesn’t go as well as everyone hoped, and Cadista is forced to take predictably extreme measures to not only save Twilight’s life, but to prevent an all-out war with Equestria.
When the story began, I admit that I was a little worried. Seeing Twilight awaken with amnesia and an adoration of the hive brought forward fears of some nefarious intentions. This worry was quickly stifled as the story went on, and in the end I am most pleased with the direction it took. I love the way Law Abiding Pony went through the trouble of identifying different cultures and traits for the different hives and how Chrysalis’s methods are not mainstream. There’s a smattering of political infighting that I’d love to see expanded upon in later stories.
For the vast scope of what the story is trying to do, it is curiously brief and fast paced. I approve of this too, as it lets us take things in story by story rather than in one massive reading blitz. Unless that's your thing, but it’s having the option not to that is so important here. Couple that with a distinct lack of groundbreaking conflicts to deal with. Oh, there’s a fight or two, and more than a few ponies face a serious shock, but there’s nothing big like an epic battle of good vs. evil or whatnot. This is, for all intents and purposes, an introductory tale for the ‘verse, and it does that job very well.
There are only two things that get in the way, one minor and the other… eh, I guess it depends upon the reader how big it is. The minor one is LUS, or I suppose in this case it’s PCS. And I mean that specifically, because I can’t tell you how many times I read the phrase “the purple changeling”. It wasn’t enough to ruin things, but it was just enough to be annoying.
The other thing happens near the end, when a character nearly gets killed. We get this big, terrible reaction like it’s a big deal, complete with a building getting blown up, only for somepony to walk up five seconds later and say “Oh, is that all? Here, let me mend that for you.” Here we are in what’s probably meant to be the big, climactic scene of the entire story, and it is concluded in what may have been the least climactic way possible.
These were only minor flaws in my eyes. Ignoring them, I liked a lot of what this series has to offer. Steady pacing, just the right amount of information to keep us going, decently written, and generally well thought out. It ends right where it needs to, leaving the reader satisfied but keeping the door open for more should they desire it.
And I most certainly desire it. We’ll be seeing the sequel in these review blogs before too long, that I can assure you.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Friend and Foe
2,018 Words
Benman failed to provide cover art.
...okay, yes, I chuckled.
Here we have a story that take the whole cartoonish angle and pulls it out into absurdity. In this story we meet Sundrop and her two friends, Fiddleblossom the farmer and Nemesis the evil necromancer. Their weekly luncheon is going well enough, except that poor Nemesis’s evil vampire queen lover just got sucked into an alternate dimension after being defeated by Celestia and Luna. Sundrop wouldn’t be a good friend if she didn’t try to cheer him up, right?
The best part about this is that everyone is in on the act, even the heroes. When Nemesis actually manages to win for once in chapter 2, the heroes are less like “Oh no, we lost!” and more like “I hope he’s got a cool dungeon. I don’t wanna stay in a lame dungeon.” The whole thing is layered with silliness of a variety I approve of. Even for bad guys, friendship’s important. After all, someone’s got to support their dreams, right?
So yeah, I liked this. It’s fun and funny and is fully aware of itself. It’s rare that I’ll read a story like this and genuinely enjoy it, but stranger things have happened. If you want some random silliness in your day for minimal time lost, give it a go.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Wizards, Fools, and Foals
2,590 Words
By FanOfMostEverything
Recommended by BlazzingInferno
This this tale, Star Swirl the Bearded is recalling a pivotal meeting from his childhood and comes upon a most troublesome epiphany.
This was interesting in its own quirky sort of way. It does a number of things that I hadn’t expected, such as hinting at a deeper background world, history and future. More to the point, the story envisions a Star Swirl whose primary focus is time magic, and thus has spent much of his life traversing the eons like a mortal, Equestrian Time Lord. In fact, the opening paragraphs had me dreading the potential appearance of just such a figure… which didn’t happen. Or did. I guess it depends on how you look at it.
On the one hand, the story seems to offer a lot in terms of background. On the other, the story doesn’t seem to offer much at all, most notably a purpose for itself. I suppose there might be a lesson in there about time and fate being irrefutable, but that feels more like a plot tool in this case than an actual purpose. It could be that FanOfMostEverything isn’t trying to say anything in the first place, which I suppose is fine, if a bit underwhelming.
And of course, it could be that I simply missed it.
Still, the story is quite interesting. From its interpretation of who Star Swirl was to his friendship with Luna, it all comes together in a nice little short. I especially liked their back and forth barrage of playful insults, some of which were amusingly fresh.
If the story has any one major fault, I would say it is from a loss of opportunity. This rendition of Star Swirl is rife with potential that, as far as I know, has gone completely unused. Still, as a little slice in the life of Equestria’s greatest wizard, I am pleased.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Below
4,546 Words
By Thought Prism
Requested by Thought Prism
Well, that was different.
In Below, Thought Prism takes a stab at recreating the world from the perspective of a creature that sees things completely different. What creature?
A giant squid.
Yeah, who saw that coming? Not me.
What really works for this is how Thought Prism went through the trouble of recreating reality from the ground up based upon what a squid may have for life experiences. Great effort is made to avoid falling into basic concepts, which starts with our aquatic protagonist making up its own names for the things it interacts with. In so doing, the squid is given its own character and personality that is inquisitive, oddly considerate and, above all else, lonely. And when the squid concludes that none of the other creatures around it can or will communicate with it, it decides to travel up to find others.
I enjoyed how Thought Prism describes things from the squid’s point of view, and the way the creature gradually forms conclusions as it observes the boats and the ponies manning them. It invites the reader to question our interpretations of what we see in things we don’t understand – such as a giant squid grabbing your boat and trying to touch you. It is, quite simply, a study in perspective, and I approve.
The only catch I can make regarding this is that the story is only an MLP one because it happens to have ponies onboard the ships instead of humans. This could be transformed into an original fiction with minimal effort, forcing me to question its place as fanfiction. Most people who read stories here are looking to learn about their favorite characters or some OCs doing OC things, not a giant squid trying to understand how life works in the ‘not world.’
That doesn’t detract from the fact that the story is good – very good, in fact – but does make is extremely difficult to attract potential readers.
If you’re here looking for stories involving My Little Pony, this might not do it for you. But if you’d like a story that is aimed at making you think, which demonstrates a certain skill in alternative perceptions, and which attracts you for its quality as a story? Yeah, give it a go.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Movements of fire and Shadow
5,534 Words
By Inquisitor M
Re-Read
One of the best reasons to re-read a story after a long span of time is that, sometimes, you see things in an entirely new light. This is precisely why I chose this story to be my last one in that set: I strongly suspected that my interpretation of it would improve with experience. When I first read it, I found I didn't care for it and was more confused than anything. The caveat is that it has indeed been a very long time since I last looked at this story, and it is entirely possible that Inquisitor M made some changes in that time.
But I don’t think he did.
Which is why I can safely say, once again: I didn’t get it. I get it now, and from a new viewpoint I find I enjoyed this story a lot more the second time.
The story starts with a knight paladin, the pegasus Artemis. Who is curiously female; I always saw that as a male name, and it confused me at first. Artemis knows Princess Luna is facing some sort of private problem, and decides to get to the bottom of it. As it turns out, this problem is related to a certain famous cellist.
Movements utilizes Inquisitor M’s typical method of telling you everything without telling you anything. By extension, it demands that the reader pay closer attention than they would for the average story lest they grow confused. This is something I wholeheartedly approve of; any style that forces readers to get better at reading is a worthwhile style in my book. The Inquisitor does one better by not falling into some of the common traps that I’ve grown so annoyed with of late, such as the wildly shifting perspective.
The story is all that it needs to be. We get plenty of nice little clues as to who our characters are, just enough scenery to keep the setting clear, a dialogue that flows nicely with the rising and falling of tension, and a length and pacing that fit the events just right. Its low scope would normally prevent me from putting it on my highest bookshelf, but for once I think the quality of the story as a whole is enough to wave that usual wall I have in place. By all means, read this story. You might learn a thing or two.
Bookshelf: Why Haven’t you Read These yet?
I'd Kiss Her
12,694 Words
By Fire Gazer the Alchemist
Sequel to I'd Do Her
I’d Do Her was an entertaining little story about Rainbow at once trying to earn Rarity’s forgiveness while meeting a rather lewd dare from Applejack at the same time, and generally making a fool of herself in the process. I’d Kiss Her starts right where it left off, with RD getting her vengeance by daring Applejack to kiss an unwitting Twilight right there and then. But what she thinks is a pretty funny joke turns into something very different when AJ takes the dare and comes to believe she’s ruined any chance she might have ever had at being Twilight’s legitimate marefriend. Now it’s up to Rarity to recover a few friendships and, most importantly, help Applejack get a date with a princess.
This one doesn’t tread quite the amusing path as its predecessor, mostly because there’s a much more serious conflict going on in this story. True, Rarity was offended by Rainbow’s behavior in the first story, but in the second story the stakes feel much higher. Yet even though it’s Applejack’s desire to be with Twilight that acts as the centerpoint of the story, the thing that really drives it forward is the interaction between Rarity and Rainbow. More than anything, this story feels like an attempt to understand just how these two have learned to be friends despite being opposites in so many ways.
It mostly has to do with patience and sincere effort.
The humor, of course, is a constant addition to the story, and all of it delivered by Rainbow Dash. Her interpretation is of a pony that is blunt, a bit abrasive, incapable of thinking before she speaks, and largely ignorant of how what she says and does affects others. It would be easy to interpret this as “Rainbow is a jerk”, but it’s far more apt to say “Rainbow’s clueless.” With regular little outbursts that completely throw the scene off or ruin the mood, this depiction is used to great comedic effect. I do find it to be a bit exaggerated, but given the poor treatment she’s been receiving in the show for a while now I can’t blame anyone for having this interpretation of her. And besides, when you combine this emotional battering ram with her very real desire to fix her mistakes, it makes for an interesting character.
To be honest, I liked the previous story more, but only because it was more amusing to me as a whole. Still, this one wasn’t bad at all.
Bookshelf: Pretty Good
Liked these reviews? Check out some others:
Paul's Thursday Reviews LV
Paul's Thursday Reviews LVI
Paul's Thursday Reviews LVII
Paul's Thursday Reviews LVIII
Paul's Fashionably Late Reviews
Paul's Thursday Reviews LIX
Paul's Thursday Reviews LX
Paul's Thursday Reviews LXI
Paul's Thursday Reviews LXII
aul's thursday Reviews LXIII
Want me to review your story? Send me a request! Check my profile page for rules.
Funny story, Below actually was original fiction first, as I had written it for a creative writing class. It also happens to be the only fic I've actually put out that isn't a first draft, as my classmates put it through the ringer in a peer review, and I made many small changes to the structure. Converting it over to pony was easy enough, and I wanted those who were fans of my work on this site to be able to read it.
That said, I am extremely flattered by your review.
Pauuuuuuuuuuuuul, I come to you for reviews, not spoilerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrs
I agree that the cat looks kinda out of place but could be pulled off if done just right I think, the sea ponies could be very good if handled well, the villain looks kinda lackluster in my opinion but we don't have any clues really on personality so he could be pulled off too, similar feelings toward the pirate Griffin.
Basically the character designs are a little different compared to the show and I'm going to need a little warming up to them, it could turn out really well, or it could turn out really bad.
Mostly I'm just afraid of what it is going to do to the cannon, change is a scary thing.
He's POOCHY!
I'm not sure what to think of the movie stuff… Honestly I wouldn't be surprised if the seapony thing is a minor point in the movie, like the mane six are in the midst of saying farewell to them during the opening credits. Any in for a shiny new toy to sell, after all.
As for the cat… the cat worries me a little since it breaks with all we know of sentience in Equestria… but I'll give the showrunners the benefit of the doubt for the time being. They can't retcon Opal… I hope.
Yanno, I've always been amused by the fact that, when the first EQG came out the fandom exploded and shunned the movie and prayed that it would be the last one. Now, everyone loves it.
Agree with Of the Hive. Some fantastic worldbuilding. Interesting premise and concept. But the plot... is... well it really subverts audience expectations and not in the best way.
Later entries in the series does this. Plus they have some wonky pacing (particularly after the 2nd). Oh you're pulled in but there's so much realpolitik and intrigue going on that... well I found it difficult to continue sympathizing with all the characters.
On that note, the 2nd one is probably the best of the series and which I thoroughly enjoyed, so read on just to get to that one.