A theme song · 10:04am Feb 13th, 2017
*Harmonica Tone*
Ahem...
When you got a Gary-Stu, what do you do?
You call an Author...
When you have a contrivance that always leads to violence.
You need an Author...
But where are you going to find one of these? Who helps heroes and villains attain some measure of ease?
Well...
You go to Smiling Dan's, you go to Smiling Dan's, from aliens to man, you go Smiling Dan's!
Howdy! I'm Smiling Dan!
You got a problem with self-inserts ruining your life with their Sue and Stu-ness? Can't have that satisfying victory over the bad guy because your friends are brainwashed sex-worshippers of some biped with a bad haircut who calls themselves 'Anon' like it's cool and edgy?
Well sir, at Smiling Dan's we provide the greatest and latest in Authors! These invisible hands will rewrite reality to give you the peace of mind and the freedom to live life how you wish it! Just put your trust in another reality warper to rewrite existance as you know it in your favour and you'll be the one on top!
Now with a discount on dealing with Caribou and Conversion Bureaus!
When you want some peace of mind, and sanity is hard to find.
Just go to the best, and he'll deal with all the rest, and your life will be the best!
His name is SMI----LING-----DAAAAAAAAAAAN!
Smiling Dan, serving your need for Authors since Imperial Ascension Year 29,665!
