Midnight Review: The Speed evolved · 10:30am Feb 11th, 2017
A Midnight Review
Hello from your neighborhood MidnightChaos, with special guest the Lunar Toaster, reviewing another Displaced story for shits and giggles, as well the benefit of the author if I can manage it. There will be jokes, possibly memes, and some spelling and grammar corrections. Opinions and wording may be seen as offensive but I will try to tone down the level of bitter asshole I usually put into things.
Mid, let’s be honest. You hardly ever tone down your levels of bitter douche-bag. Also, my comments will be happily be bolded! Now you know.
The Speed evolved by StarCloud
Sign number one we have a serious issue here, lack of capitalization in the title itself. “Sorry ma’am, I forget your food and so did the chef, here’s your dipping sauce though!” That’s pretty much all I can equate this to doing. Also, this basically reads as Sanic.
19 Likes 35 Dislikes 35 Comments 350 Views
Yeah, things aren’t looking up for this story. In fact, I’ve read it before and I am only reviewing it because I didn’t even bother trying to understand what on Earth I was reading. So, here you’ll have my actual and genuine first reactions to picking through this. Lords have mercy on my soul.
Hello my name is Zanitar and I am the god of speed and adaption. I am a normal displaced and I am just trying to live my life while fighting monsters and if anyone of you displaced want to do a crossover with me then I would gladly do one with you.
...Zanitar? The god of speed and adaption? What the actual hells, this is just absolutely horrifying and I just can’t process who in their right mind would bother to even try writing this edgefest. Another thing is that calling yourself or your character a god is a surefire way to get downvotes and let people know, “Look at my bootiful self-insert about muh character who es a god. He’s so cool! Sonuvabitch.”
“Normal” and “god” just don’t go in hand, StarCloud. That’s like calling Cthulhu, the god of darkness, a typical everyday teenager. (On a side note, there is a Displaced fic that’s basically of this and it’s mildly hilarious.) The only part of this that holds true is Displaced fighting a monster. I will give you this.
You just broke the fourth wall and that’s just… That’s at least half of the downvotes, right there.
Caracter is inspired by Prototype and the series The Flash.
This is a displaced story so read if you like those.
I might change things here later on but for now I will have it like this.
And if you know of a good cover pick then send me it and I will show it here.
“Caracter” is spelled wrong. Also, you literally are throwing these two things together when they belong no where near each other when you do it like this. It’s like putting bleach and ammonia together. The fumes. Are. Deadly.
...Yeah, I already am okay with those, but the majority aren’t something I usually read. Yes, I founded the damn group but I don’t like everything from it. In fact, I don’t like the majority of the fics since they’re a lot like this. This is why Displaced has a shitty reputation. This.
Please, I beg of you change it. Delete it, do something. Everything about this is foreboding and scares me. Mama, can I go back in the cupboard please? MAMA WHY.
...I know of a good cover pic for this, give me a second.
But in all seriousness, work on this. You could find cover art if you didn’t make this disturbingly mixed characters from other fandoms.
Chapter 1 Bye Bye earth
...More grammar errors. Seriously, I get you are Swedish but why haven’t you gotten an editor. Here’s a link to some editing groups:
Author's Note:
Hello i am not dead, i just went thru my first writhers block so i have been reading much.
Mostly HIE.
Well this is something new i am making so read and tell what needes to be fixed and on friday i will send out another one.
Bye and may the speedforce be with you.
I didn’t even know who you were when I saw this, hell, I’m not sure I even cared you weren’t dead. On a new note, I didn’t know writhers block was a thing, but I digress. Why did you have writhers block? And, I read HiE too, but my gods this is something.
…”needes”? “So read”? You shouldn’t force people to read it, or passive aggressively suggest they do so. On a sidenote, why Friday? Why not edit it first?
...Speedforce? What is that, a sonic thing? I digress, allegedly it’s some that’s actually used for the Flash and I am more or less shocked about that. Speed + Force? 10/10 IGN. 100/100/ ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT. IT’S SO ORIGINAL.
A 
for you as well, I suppose.
Chapter 1 Bye bye earth
POV Love Meler
I was walking through the doors to the comic con here in Sweden and I was hoping that people would see me.
Why? Because I was in a costume that was so OP.
I had made a costume for a character i called Zenitar, the god of speed and adaption.
He is a person that became stuck between two universes and his body mutated into a mix between an Evolved from Prototype and the villain Savitar, the god of speed.
No, I promise you. This is not a sick joke. The fic literally starts like that, just introducing the chapter title and the character’s name as POV. Love Meler? It sound already ponified, seriously. I feel sorry for you, if your parents were such hippies. Are your siblings names, “Weed” and “Metha”?
Furthermore, this first paragraph, or sentence, whatever it is just so fast paced that not even RD could catch up to it. It’s literally ignoring the entire idea of a set-up and throws me for a loop. No description, no detail, just “I was doing this” like you’re an eleven year old roleplaying. “*snorts snot back into nose and adjusts glasses* Uh, your uh, guy is my area. Like you only rolled a 2, and I rolled 3. You lose to my elven lord of darkness who wears these really cool sunglasses and a red cape.”
…”Because I was in a costume that was so OP.” I’m laughing so hard at this, oh my lords. I cannot believe you literally just stated exactly what I expected of this character. Wait… IT’S BECOMING SELF AWARE. RUN, OH GODS, RUNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Zenitar” or “Zanitar” make up your mind on your own character’s name. But, here we have a stereotypical introduction of an OP Mary Sue OC. And, the actual mention of this character’s alleged godhood. On a side note, this next bit and description make it sound like you made a horrid Displaced before even getting Displaced. HOW did he turned into “an Evolved” and mixed with Savitar? On reflection, this is close you your name and there is nothing of note on WHY you named him Zanitar other than the fact it’s closer in spelling to Savitar. Also, why does Prototype’s stuff get it named for Prototype but Savitar doesn’t get but a shitty little “god of speed” mention? I get absolutely none of the explanation for why, because, it just doesn’t exist. You literally plugged these two characters into one outlet, and prayed that it wouldn’t explode. Here’s a hint. It exploded 12 years ago.
Well you should know that it is not easy finding parts to this costume. I fixed a green bodysuit and glued on metal pieces and even cut a green water pipe and glued on the ends to look like they are pipes that send poison to one part of the shoulder to the elbow. I had bought online a gauntlet but I misread and only got one so my other arm had no cool claw hand on it. But that would not make me sad because this was going to be an awesome day.
I sincerely agree, because this entire premise seems flawed and I doubt you just bought something. I can’t commend you on the effort, nor the result. Seriously, this entire thing sounds like you are wearing a simple green body suit, pipes, and a single gauntlet. It just sounds lazy. In fact, reading this makes wonder if your ideas about either game, or whatever Savitar is from, are even accurate or well thought out.
You only got one? Seriously, why do I feel like this is seriously just a ridiculously placed plot device? Probably because it is.
.. I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that you mean you’re mildly depressed because the costume is unfinished? Probably, which is also ridiculous but I digress.
I first went and looked at the shops hoping to find something good until I heard a voice calling me.
“Well I have never seen anyone like you before, stranger” the voice said.
I looked at my side and saw a man who looked like something from a game.
“Well it is nice that somepony saw me” I said as I was giving him a clue that I am a brony (I am one and you can’t sue me for liking that series).
…”Shops”? The fuck is this, the mall? I think you mean stands, because shops honestly gives the completely wrong image. Seriously, get that editor, it may save your life, because if you don’t, the trolls will kill you.
Okay, at this point I’m going to question if you even know what the Merchant is or does. For those of you wondering why I’m questioning this, here’s why. The Merchant is a being that travels between universes and is fucking older than dirt. He has to have seen this horrid entity before. As for that description, it is shittier than six midgets using the same bucket as a bathroom.
...I think I spent at least ten minutes just staring at the computer screen asking if this was what you, wondering if you were serious. Apparently, you were which resulted in tears and facepalms of disbelief. Every time I read this, a tear escapes my eyes at the sheer astonishment.
I doubt I’d get anything out of sueing you anyways.
“Well, a good sales pony has a good eye and it is telling me that you might not have a complete cosplay there” he said letting me know that he is a brony too with a smile on his face.
“My fellow brony, if you know where I could find something and tell me your name I would be very happy” I said hoping to find a new friend.
“Well, you can call me The Merchant and I have this, if you want, for only, I think fifty kronor as you would call it” The Merchant said as he took from under the table a gauntlet that looked perfect.
...I’m pretty sure ANYONE could tell his cosplay is unfinished. Case in point that he’s some dweeb in a green bodysuit with pipes and a single claw. Furthermore, the next bit just made me scream what for like five minutes. What kind of person gets that much information from a smile!? No, seriously, what kind of fucking person aside from Sherlock bloody HOLMES.
...Okay, I can understand asking him where you could find the other gauntlet, but asking for a name is just foolish or ridiculous. You honestly should only care about someone’s name if you owe them something, or if you hold common interests. On another note, why does every single brony I talk to over fantasize the “friendship” thing? Seriously, you can’t be friends with everyone.
...That’s literally the worst introduction of the Merchant I’ve seen yet, and some have been described or written worse. You know why this is bad? Because it’s probably the most ungodly and uninformed introduction I’ve ever met. It’s brief, illogical, and sits worse than me than Strawberry Horchata. This is like introducing the final boss of a video game with, “Hi, I’m Paul, nice to meet you, oh you’re a hero, I hate you, let’s fight.” And I mean that literally, no pauses.
...How many of you apply such fucking amounts of money to the purchase? Half the time, it’s either an exchange or free, that’s what I’ve seen. I’d call this creative, but every time it’s been done, it’s awful.
What even IS this description? A perfect gauntlet, what the hells? In fact, is this even a gauntlet, because I’m fairly certain you’ve mentioned that they were claws at some point. A gauntlet is a piece of armor, not a piece of a cosplay.
“Where did you get something like this” I asked looking at the perfect gauntlet.
“Well, it was a defective thing i bought for future deals” he said knowing I would by it.
“That is a wonderful low price so I can’t ignore something like this” i thought.
“That is perfect and you can call me Zanitar if you want” I said as I pulled out a fifty kronor bill out of my bag at the belt under the metal and gave it to him.
Is that a question? Sorry, there isn’t any question mark so I can’t tell. Thankfully, you mentioned you asked, so that helps. However, awful descriptive abilities strikes again.
WHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT. wHAT. WHAT. whaT. No, no. No. No. Seriously, I can’t believe this. I don’t even have a word for what’s wrong. HOW DOES HE KNOW YOU WOULD BUY IT WHEN HE MENTIONED IT WAS DEFECTIVE? Why did he buy something defective, and besides, it’s not even defective because we already know what the Merchant does.
...A wonderful price of weak money, so basically free. Excellent.
Thick heavy Russian accent Yes yes, my product-- brand new! And it is at discount because it has sliiiiiiight defect. Please buy!
Like fucking sending you to another universe?
Like I said. Sliiight defect.
Mhm, yeah… let’s go with that.
...Isn’t the character’s name Love Meler? Changing the name BEFORE Displacement, original. Originally stupid character, seriously. In fact just use your old name, it’s about as original as you’re going to get. Also…
out of my bag at the belt under the metal
I literally spent five minutes trying to decrypt this. All I got in return was a bad headache, and I’m pretty sure I have Terminal 7.
What even is this. On what planet does this wording make any sense? You severely need that editor because I am confused as fuck. Does he have his bag under his belt buckle? Why does he even have a belt? WHERE IS THIS BELT? Seriously, with what I’ve garnered from your description, he wasn’t wearing a belt and his cosplay is a green suit with mario pipes and claws.
We’ll just have to go with the assumption he literally looks like that. Though I can’t help but imagine him wearing tin all over his body… like random bits of aluminium and pop cans.
Touche.
“Well, we might not meet again but I will help you in the future” he said as I took the gauntlet and put it on.
“Goodbye and good sales for your future” I said before I felt a little dizzy.
How is mister shadyman going to help him when he’s said they won’t meet again, most likely? Perhaps a different wording would be best, “While we might not meet again, I will help you should we do so.” Is this character actually stupid? Actually, wait. I suppose there is nothing to suspect except, wait… YOU’RE A SNAKE. A SNAKE.
And now prepare your eyes for the quickest change in pacing since “Mistake” was released. I mean, you can’t not read this in an extremely quick voice. Go ahead. Try it.
Then all of a sudden I fell down a hole that was all black inside and I could feel tremendous pain in my body as I was falling.
If I would explain the pain the best way possible I would say that my body was being destroyed piece by piece and grown back out of nothing. The worst part was that I could not lose conscience and sleep away the pain. Finally I could feel my body on a cold marble floor before I passed out.
...And...Scene! In all seriousness, this entire section made me question my own existence. While, yes, it is a common trope to use, sometimes people pace it even faster than I thought possible. This is like SANIC TEH HEDHOG snorted fifteen pounds of quality grade meth with a dash of coke. It’s given 35 people, as of today, a severe case of whiplash. *law and order theme* Today, the author known as StarCloud is being charged and sued for abuse, in the form of sending numerous people to the hospital with cases of whiplash.
*If I could. Not to mention this analogy is just odd and disturbing. *Consciousness. Furthermore, you FINALLY pass out? Really, I’m fairly certain you could pass out from pain that allegedly intense, but I digress.
”I can handle it!” said no one ever.
POV Luna minutes earlier
“Boring” I said as I was laying back in my chair looking exhausted and letting my wings fall to the floor.
It was night and I was sitting in my room in a dark blue dress with stars on it reading through old boring papers that I had to sign.
Ever since I was free from Nightmare Moon's control I had been sitting in my room and been signing papers and reading history all the time and it had been so boring I had forced my sister in letting me go to the Grand Galloping Gala next month.
Luna minutes earlier? Who is that? What is that? You need to edit that and make it clearer as to what exactly you mean. Currently, it reads as all one thing. And, maybe a horizontal rule.
You say boring, I say edgy, confusing, and cringeworthy. It’s like looking through red mirrored shades.
You say edgy, confusing and cringeworthy. I say-- HARUGH!
Gibberish, yeah, pretty much.
No no, sorry. I just puked a little.
Didn’t you already do that when we were reading this out loud?
Yup. Twice. Now make that a third.
Suffice to say, the next part of this excerpt is just as bad. The grammar is just as bad here as it was throughout the entirety of the fic. The description is blander than a bran muffin and comes with the same basic result; you probably shit yourself just reading this and reacting.
No, reading this is akin to eating a whole-wheat unsalted saltine. You know, the kind that taste like cardboard and makes you wanna retch?
Good point, not to mention the usage of ands, it’s basically like tossing fifty whole tomatoes in a salad and going, “Yeah that looks good”. And, on another note, why is Luna, sorry, “Lund” as she was called further down the line, even signing papers in order to go to the Gala? Oh wait, she forced Celestia to let her go.
Signing papers to go to the Gala. Don’t you just need like… a Willy Wonka ticket or something? And shouldn’t you AUTOMATICALLY be able to go into the fucking Gala? You’re a princess for Christ’ sake!
I’VE GOT A GOLDEN TICKET. I’VE GOT A GOLDEN TICKE-HARUGH. Damn it, Toaster. You’ve made contagious. Either way, you’ve got a point about how she is a princess. It’s like telling the president, or the leaders of any country, “You can’t visit us, we’re a different country. Get your passport and meet us at the airport.”
Luckily for me I still had my puppy eyes and it worked like a charm but it was still another month until the Gala and I still needed to sign these papers until I could take a break and rest until morning so I can sleep.
All of a sudden I heard a “donk” behind me and I looked and saw a strange bipedal metal creature lying on the floor unconscious.
I jumped out of my chair and ran to the creature to see if it was still alive.
I put two fingers on its´ neck and felt a pulse but the disturbing thing was I could feel twenty beats a second.
I would love to point out that the grand entrance of this… god, what’s his name?
Sanictar? The god of speed, adaption, and making me cringe. May the speedforce be with you.
Yes, Sanictar. The one who uses the cocaine infused version of the Force. Mickey Mouse called. He wants the Force back. But… This fucker’s grand entrance is a simple ‘Donk’. GG for spectacular entrance. I could drop a pencil into a garbage can and it could make more of a racket than what this asshat produced. And “strange bipedal metal creature’? Aren’t you anthro?! Why is it worded like she’s a pony!
Because, who gives a damn about consistency?
Waiter, I want a refund on my smoothie. The consistency is even worse than a dried turd on a hot desert day.
It’s both horribly chalky, and it tastes like shit. As you you’ve addressed his entrance, let me address the paragraph previous. First off, it’s not even a paragraph, it’s a run-on sentence. Furthermore, while I can see Luna having puppy eyes, why is it even necessary. To be realistic, and to quote Toaster. SHE. IS. A. PRINCESS. I picture myself as Woody shaking Buzz when I do this. Rest until morning? Until morning. To sleep.
Yes, so you can sleep… while you sleep! Great wording Luna. I also want to point out the fact that she RUNS UP TO THIS CREATURE THAT HAS POPPED INTO EXISTENCE, AND CHECKS THE FUCKING PULSE. This is against EVERYTHING of what you should do if something appears out of nowhere, 101. And 20 beats per SECOND?! How does one even count that fast! Luna, are you a god damn stop-watch?
How does one survive that? His heart should have logically exploded. Biologically, the human body would both be overloaded, and it would be fucking impossible because the average heart beat is like 60 per MINUTE.
I feel bad for this fucker. Because as soon as he gets ANYTHING akin to a bleeding cut, he’s gonna lose all of his body in less than 10 seconds. Flat.
In short, this:
...wait, with a BPM er… BPS of 20… a cut would be nearly explosive, would it not?
*spins fingers and points at Toaster, sunglasses glint* You got it, bby.
I looked at the creature and saw that its´ body was full of metal pieces grown out of him like armor and under his armor was green flesh and out of his armes was like pipes connecting one part of his body to another.
I cast a spell on him to see if he was injured. His body started to change making him look like his body was made out of green and black tendrils. I stopped and his body changed back to what I think is his normal form.
Why is an apostrophe jammed in the middle of this? It should be “It’s”. Furthermore, you literally just confirmed my image of him, along with Toaster’s. Like Luigi got fucked by the magical pipe monster.
‘out of his armes was like pipes connecting one part of his body to another’ ...so. SO. This fucker is not only made out of a bunch of fucking tin. But is also sprouting some basic PVC piping! He is the ultimate shit god. And-- how the fuck does it make in any remote sense that when Luna scanned him, he fucking changed?! It’s like the Starship Enterprise scanned a planet and then it suddenly turned pear-shaped!
Beam me out of here, Toasty. The fact she “thinks” it’s his normal form? Not to mention the fact, he changed BACK? It’s like the Enterprise getting out of sight of the planet and just *pwif* back to normal, no big dil.
Meanwhile on the surface of the planet THERE HAS BEEN NUMEROUS EARTHQUAKES! EVERYTHING IS DYING! THE WORLD HAS GONE PEARSHA- *pwif* Oh! Back to normal. Carry on!
“GUARDS” I shouted to the door and a unicorn guard wearing dark blue armour came in.
“What is the ma.., what is that, princess?” the guard said looking with wide eyes at the knocked out creature on the floor.
“I don’t know but he needs help. Can you take him to the medic wing for scanes and rest” I said as I levitated him to the guard.
“Yes, princess” he said as he took the creature over his right shoulder and started to run to the medic wing.
If this ‘medic’ wing is filled with medics from Team Fortress 2… I may die in happiness. Because I know Medic is gonna make this next procedure, EXCRUCIATING!
Mua ha ha. On another note, he used .., instead of ellipses like he should have. It just reads wrong and is incredibly weird to try and work out. Not to mention, why did he notice it that late? And, she is just okay with him?
Mmm… also, this entire time he’s been spelling ‘armour’ as ‘armor’... only this once does he spell it correctly. And before you all get your panties in a bunch, I prefer it the ‘our’ rather than ‘or’. It just looks nicer.
You have a point, like “theater” and “theatre”. For some reason the second fits better in my mind.
Or Aluminium and Aluminum. Or Ton/tonne.
“Scanes”? Is this like scones? Also, how the fuck did a guard- oh wait, they’re anthro.
Yay for misconceptions.
Wouldn’t running hurt him more? I digress.
“I wonder what has happened to him” I asked no one and started to try to continue to sign papers but I could not stop thinking about him.
It wasn´t until five minutes later that I gave up on trying to focus on work and started to walk to the medic wing.
“I need to know all about him, even if I need to be awake all day” I said as I walked through the halls.
...Why are you asking that out loud? Either way, this seems like something you should leave for a thought. Especially when you consider you’re alone. But, here we go, stereotypical Luna X SI. Romance is beautiful, isn’t it, Toaster?
...I’m all for LunaXsomeone. But… bleegh. It’s poorly set up. Like… REALLY poorly set up. I’m pretty sure I could piss a better relationship in the snow that’s better than this shit.
Let it snow, let it snow, let it fucking snow. On a side note, is that even an apostrophe for wasn’t? But, that aside, did you seriously only work for another five minutes? Your work ethic is fucking shit.
And, finally, why does she even need to be awake? I’m just happy that this is the last few bits.
Don’t hold your breath. We still have a certain Celestia to deal with.
Oh yeah… Catholic!Celestia.
Alright, well that’s it for this review, and don’t hold your breath because we will be moving on to the next segment of this fic later this week. Sorry for the sheer evil and brutality of the comments, StarCloud, but it’s best you find out.
(...you might wanna hold your breath. I farted a little.)
Damn it, Toast. Anyway, everyone feel free to go out on a limb and offer StarCloud some help. This review may be brutal, but attacking the user simply because you detest what they made just isn’t cool. It’s cold.
But… wouldn’t that make us just icecubes..? Or do we have a sliiiight pass here.
Salt water doesn’t freeze as easily, Toast.
No, but it does take it that much colder.
Our rage fueled us.
You aren’t the one who read it out loud!
Touche, but I think we should stop having a conversation over the text, it probably looks ridiculous considering I already did a sign off. Now, do a sign-off.
Probably. Now use that damn voice of yours over Discord. And, thank you all for reading up on… uh, whatever this was. We’ll be coming out with a nice little bonus second part for the second chapter. I don’t think we’ll be reviewing the others though, unless something substantial pops up.
The Speed Ebolaed. (Like people crying for more.) Follow us for review updates, or just join in Good HiE List. I’m MidnightChaos, and I’m a Toasty Toaster, yeah. We’ll see in the next segment of Midnight Reviews, thanks for reading, chucklefucks.
I feel like cinemasins if this was writing...... wonder what form of punishment would go for. Note this isn't meant to discourage those who want to write more like see different criticism in order to avoid mistakes. Either that or test yourself for seeing a different view of another person in order to understand from their prospective.
How'd did You get that WHHHHAAATTTT to go off screen?
4418105
Magic.
HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOO there
I just read this and I have a few things too say.
1. I am bad at writhing.
2. I had a not so good editor on this so this was better than what came directly out of my writing.
3. I know someone whoes name is Love but you say it differently.
4. I just mixed some random things in my head.
5. He lookes like savitar with a few changes.
6. Thanks fore being honest.
4418318 But. You literally described him as a 'mario pipe man'. With a single claw. Or gauntlet.
CLAW. OR GAUNTLET.
4418318
Hello darling, nice to see your craziness in my comment section.
Fire away dear.
Yeah, perhaps that may just be an editing issue. I think if you get an editor, write, and then explain what you want you may get a better result. Just listen to them and learn from them. It's the best way.
I guessed as much, dear, but my gods. Clearly, your editor either didn't care or lazily went through this.
Pronunciation being; Yuh-veh? Yuh-uhve?
In a blender on fire? No offense, but this seriously a very unplanned combination and sits poorly.
No idea who Savitar is, but I shall take your word for it.
It's what I'm trying to do, retain honestly while at least being constructive.
Why not create another Displaced universe and group with stricter rules? With a pre created lore. Set amount ant pantheon of Displacern. And set of basic rules for character to be displaced. I mean with this you could create a Displaced universe that will allow you to keep up the quality and maybe stop this group to get such a bad rep ^^.
But my respect for your determination is growing with every review. (And my fear for my story is growing too XD)
I would also like to know what you think about a self created Crossover character as Displaced character.
4418318
One tip from me. Slow down, take time for the scenes. I don't mean thinking about them, but writing them. Take time to create the setting and let the characters work in it not without it. It looks like you have your characters working and living on a white back ground and not in Equestria or where ever this takes place.
I personally don't like Displaced who start as crossover character. But this is for everyone to decide for them self.
4418606
Because that is what I've been doing the main group, just without good results in the department of quality.
It is? That's good to hear. As it your growing fear.
I suppose you mean a lot like what happened in this fic, and honestly, I can understand originality but... This is just horrifying.
4418688
I know you tried, but I was already part of the group as this stronger rules started. But I think you can try to cut away the rotten part but the steak can not be saved. Get a new one and don't let it start to rot. At least when you can't stand the already rotting steak anymore ^^.
Why do I get the feeling you like it when other people fear you?
Well I wait until my Story is in front of the firing squad XD.
I have a question do you only review displaced fics?
4420205
Hie and Displaced