The Many Variations Of Mamihlapinatapai - A Little Insight · 6:33pm Feb 6th, 2017
So, this post is a little different from the rest of my blog posts, for I just wanted to spend some time talking about what has been my most controversial story so far, mostly because I found the process of writing it a little more interesting and, at times, troublesome than anything else I've done. There's a reason the story's description asked you to read between the lines, after all.
Be warned, this post is going to be long, and by long, I mean long.
It's just gonna consist of me explaining how this particular story was conceived, how many variations had stemmed from this story alone, the things and events that inspired it to come to be, and what I was ultimately trying to explore. For those of you who got it, kudos! For those who didn't, it'll all be condensed here.
Oh, and there'll be pictures! Don't wanna bore you with words all the time! In fact, here's one right now!
The story's cover art: 'wish you were here' by Mewball
First things first: how did it all begin?
The first ideas of the story came from a very simple thought I had.
"What if one of the most hated characters in the fandom found himself in a situation in which the rest of the ponies hated him?"
Personally, I've always found Flash's place in the fandom a little interesting. At one end of the extreme, we have the couple of people who were absolutely obsessed with this new pairing, and on the other, we have a majority that condemned him just because it's the first concrete mutual romance involving a main character in this show.
To be clear, I'm one of those neutral to the pairing— not 'meh, I'm indifferent to it' neutral, more like 'okay, so this exists' neutral. I acknowledge the pairing as something I would explore, given a little inspiration, which it did. I personally felt like Flash Sentry did not deserve a lot of the hate that the fandom gave him. Other than him being a bland character — that alone was somewhat rectified in the latest EqG movie — there's no good reason to hate him. At least, one not good enough to convince me he's as bad as some people make him out to be.
In the end, what really drove me to begin writing the story was to reflect the majority of the fandom's overreaction to Flash Sentry. The premise of it was all there in Entry #1: Flash Sentry, Twilight Sparkle being a secondary victim and the backlash that came with it. There's been a lot of parodies of it, as much as there have been shipfics gushing over the two, but I haven't actually find the middle ground on the whole fiasco. Even more so, I haven't found anyone making an attempt to differentiate Equestria's Flash Sentry from his human counterpart. I thought it'd be interesting if I wrote one out instead. You know, just to see what some people might think.
Of course, with how many dislikes it raked up on day one alone, it ended up lowering my expectations of people on this site, sadly enough.
What followed up after that soon became the subject of endless changes.
The direction to take the story was tough. I already knew the major, more emotional events that would be in the story. By the end of Chapter 2, I knew for sure I'd reveal Twilight had lost her wing in a fire. I knew they would have their arguments, that Flash will have a standoff with the mastermind behind the whole plot, and the final scene would involve a surge and end with a picnic.
Apart from those parts, here's where the story starts to splinter based on different themes and approaches.
The first draft was the darkest variation; Flash's mother was supposed to be a main villain.
Being based on the theme of an obsessive, almost incestuous parental love. it would involve her planning this alone and the final scene would ultimately end with Twilight killing his mother. After a lot of careful consideration, I decided to scrap it, not only because it was hard to explain it all without leaving any glaring loopholes behind, but also because it didn't truly reflect the sentiment of those who were against this shipping.
The next few drafts were as dark, with many of the characters I Intended to be the villains becoming supporting characters instead, each with their own approach to themes surrounding love, obsession, trust and betrayal. One of the darker variations would offshoot to become an upcoming standalone one-shot titled Velleity, which I would release soon.
So what made this story go down the direction it did? Why choose Cardinal Atelier as the villain? Why have a radio interview? Why the emphasis of change and power? Why tear a rift between these two lovebirds, only for them to come back together in the end?
All of it can be answered simply with one word: politics.
I can't deny that though I wasn't present, the availability of the Internet and the tremendous amount of news coming from the United States affected this story in some way. Not only that, but also from countries such as South Korea, the Philippines, the UK, even here in Malaysia. All the politics of the world were adhering to a certain pattern — going against the establishment — and I thought it would be nice to just put out my thoughts underneath the guise of a story involving technicolor ponies.
I would say this general sentiment also reflects the fandom's hate on Flash Sentry. I find it intriguing that many of these people wouldn't mind inserting themselves to be romantically involved with Twilight or support something as beyond me as Spider Man being with her (still have no idea where that came from) yet could not accept it when Hasbro has him come into the picture. Granted, they topped one off by putting someone more aggravating than him, but the Flash-hating was at its peak long before that. It's a little funny, really.
I've made it clear where I stand in a previous blog post, but when I was writing it, I consciously wrote it to coincide with what's happening during all that period of time. It's hard not to, particularly with all the misinformation and lies being handed around social media like some Oprah revival. I could go on and on about so much more, though my stance on it can be summed up by one line in Entry #13.
"Maybe... maybe back then, things were different. Maybe it was that bad back then, but by now, everything already changed! Everything became better! You said this society wanted to change the world for the better, yet none of you even realized it already did!"
Make what you will of that.
On a more personal level, however, this story also reflected some semblance of my life in 2016.
Rant time.
Since my internship ended in the end of 2015, I had not been able to find a decent job for the longest time. The fact that I'm sharing a car with my little brother further solidifies that, especially since he's now using it for his internship as well. My parents were noticeably upset on that notion, and at times, I had to lie to them just because the truth wouldn't fare any better. It's hard finding a creative career in a country where opportunities are meek and feeble, and money is all on the mind, as well as what could be considered 'sufficient' experience. Even more so, I find our creative industry as unsustainable as much as I deem it hypocritical, particularly if you want younger people to be invested in it.
Simply put, you're not doing anyone a favor if you're only gonna work with people in your own circle all the time.
Honestly, I'm at the limit here, which is partially why I opened a Patreon on this account to at least help myself out, albeit to no success. I'm working on a few things, though with how everything went on, I can't confidently say that success would even be around the corner.
As much as this was Flash's story about failure and the fear of it, this was mine.
Conclusively, this story served as a reflection of many things, and hopefully, it would do its job. Once again, easily summed up in a line in Entry #13:
That when the time comes and we ourselves read this story again, we are to be reminded of the deeds that we've done.
So, if you have read this story, I could only thank you endlessly for it, for I don't really know what else to do apart from displaying my gratitude. It was a struggle trying to get it out, as it was trying to be as introspective as I could be, but I hoped it did its job. If you reached this point of the post without skipping a word, I could only thank you more for that. Seriously, I don't know how else to say it.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I hope I'll be around here a little longer to provide something like this once again.
As usual, I'll leave you guys and girls with a song that's most fitting to Mamihlapinatapai in every way imaginable.
See you next time.
Bandersnatch Copperbutt at 1:31
Thanks for all that in-depth background knowledge. It would have been a little disturbing for Flash's mother to have that kind of a role in the story. Glad you didn't take that path.
This story and even the ending left me with no words. I can't say is a good or a bad ending. Is just... What it is. I don't know if you get what I'm saying.
4418173
...is that a good thing or a bad thing?
Honestly, that's pretty much the reaction I sought for. It's the ending tailored purely for the story and its themes, particularly the ones surrounding fear, regret and uncertainty. The way it was written was for emphatic effect— to comprehend the situation that both Flash and Twilight were left with. How you interpret the situation would differ from person to person, which is another monster to unpack altogether.
Apart from this, there's a multitude of other things I could dive into in this blog post, though I decided only to mention the main inspirations for the story. It'll take an essay to really unpack them and I don't exactly have the time, energy nor desire to do that.
4418206 Is not bad. Not at all, I just had so much mixed emotions about the ending. It has this incomplete and bittersweet taste. I would be lying if I say I was satisfied with the ending. Of course with how the atmosphere is on this story a good sunshine and pink fluffy clouds would have been out of the context. It has the proper ending it should have. After reading this insight I must agreed that some ideas were a little too much (the maybe incestuous feeling of Flash's mother) would have taken out the reality hitting in your face feeling this story has and hooks people up. So the good and bad ending I mostly see in stories is mixed here much to both my dismay and enjoyment.