In Memory Of Review · 11:46pm Dec 18th, 2016
Video made by me.
This review is going to be difficult for me, I'm not going to lie.
Its not that this is a bad fanfic, its actually really good, the thing is that its not only sad, it also hits me on a personal level. This is a good fanfic that sets out to tell its story and does it very well.
Of course I'm talking about In Memory Of, normally what I do with reviews is tackle one fanfic at a time, but since this is a one shot I'll be reviewing the whole thing today of course. I hope you all enjoy it, it really is a good fanfic.
So without further ado, lets begin.
---In Memory Of---
So we start out the fanfic with a brief description of the area around Junction R-7 and the distant skyscrapers of Manehattan. Its short, but you get an idea of what's happened in the Wasteland and the world around our main character. Speaking of which, we get this set of dialogue next:
“I got in! I passed the test, see?” her voice echoed, so young and innocent.
“Luna’s school for gifted unicorns? That’s wonderful! I’m so proud of you.”
“Do you think I’ll see you again?” she asked once more, uncertain and afraid.
“I’ll come visit you everyday.”
Her face lit up brighter than the sun on a clear day, with a smile to warm hearts. “You’ll bring big sister too, right?”
“Of course I will, It wouldn’t be a visit without your big sister, right?”
I smiled down at her and nodded assuredly. “Yeah! I promise, and I won’t break it!”
And with that our protagonist Ditzy Doo wakes up next to Lionheart. We start to see what's been happening with Junction Town since Sunshine and Rainbows, that it has grown into a town comparable to Ponyville in size. Its a good moment that does well to establish how things have progressed since the NCR was founded.
Ditzy gets the store set up and goes back to wake up Lionheart, apparently even in the morning when he's waking up Lionheart is still loud. Its also at this point that its established that it has been a long time since the events of the original fanfic because Silver Bell, Ditzy's adopted daughter, had grown up and moved out. Ditzy gets to work at the store, its a pretty slow morning so she's reading a book, or well probably re-reading it.
That's when Silver Bell pays her a visit, it seems that Ditzy is still falling back on her maternal instincts, Ditzy starts to re-write the words on a chalkboard in the shop, but she's clearly a bit distracted since she's messing up a straight line. She corrects her mistake after Silver Bell points it out and gets back to work.
So as the day passes and they get a few customers, including a male Alicorn looking for Vertibuck parts for some reason (I have to wonder why), Silver Bell is curious about the book Ditzy is reading. Ditzy explains that it was about Equestria's cultures from a thousand years before the war. There are missing pages however and Silver Bell suggests that she might be able to find another copy, maybe from one of the caravans, though Ditzy says that its unlikely. As she's about to turn the page however, a familiar stallion's voice is heard over the radio.
“Greetings, fillies and gentlecolts, DJ Pon3 here, bringing to you the Wasteland news!”
Video owned by Bethesda.
Silver Bell comments that DJ Pon3 seems to sound older and more sad, something that Ditzy laments on because as a Ghoul she doesn't age at all. There is a definite feeling of pain because of this, especially as it relates to Silver Bell, she's basically relegated to watching her loved ones grow up while she remains. Its a sad prospect for her and sadly its the price of being a Ghoul, that and the possibility that you'll someday lose your mind and start hungering for brains.
So according to Pon3 it seems that things have been calming down ever since Neighvarro, Raiders and Slavers have been on the decline, in particular because of Applejack's Rangers (a bit optimistic, but okay). The Ponyville Hellhound sanctuary is thriving, and finally Pon3 leaves us with this piece of advice:
Now I’ve got one last piece of advice for you little ponies out there, if you’re ever following the caravan routes, or the old Equestria roads, do take the time to admire the scenery. Unless you’re fresh out of a stable, it isn’t hard to see that the last twenty five years have been good to Equestria, healthy apple tree’s, lush green pastures and occasionally flowers, normal, actual flowers. But be careful, not all of Equestria has these random patches of green, some area’s are still tainted and impure, so keep an eye on your Rad-meter, that is all.
Always good to see that Homage (assuming that she's still the DJ) hasn't lost her touch.
So after a little bit of interaction between Ditzy and Silver, Ditzy is surprised to find Velvet Remedy coming to the store. After the two hug, they get down to business with Velvet wanting supplies. It turns out that Velvet and others are putting together a gala of sorts to commemorate the Littlehorn tragedy. It pains Ditzy when she realizes that she had forgotten about the tragedy, and what had happened to somepony special to her.
So as the party begins that night, Ditzy seems to prefer to keep to herself, at least until she was approached by Velvet, Xenith, and Homage. They ask her why she wasn't with the others, and Ditzy explains that she had lost somepony in the Littlehorn massacre, which they understand. It also seems that Calamity is on some sort of journey, though Velvet doesn't go into the details about where he is. At the same time Homage seems to have some lingering wishes that LittlePip was out with them, though she seems to understand that she has to be where he is, even if its hard for her.
“You want Fluttershy to be here now, just like I wanted “her’ back for only a moment. The problem is, Velvet… we can’t always get what we want in life. Things happen, sometimes unavoidable and we can either move on, wait; or we can stay back and let it bother us to death."
Song owned by the Rolling Stones.
There is some more talk from the mares about their past adventures and maybe Calamity is having a midlife crisis, Regina joins the group, but Ditzy leaves not long after in order to clear her head.
There is a definite feeling of pain as Ditzy returns home and reflects on the fact that she had forgotten about Littlehorn. She finds the old acceptance letter from Luna's School and a picture of them together before the massacre. There is a sense of regret, its a painful moment to read and incredibly well done. The grief is coming back to her even as Mouse tries to reassure her in her, mouse way, Ditzy wonders why they had hurt her, she had been innocent.
And apparently the universe has a strange sense of humor because the very next chapter in the book is about burial practices and honoring the deceased. After reading for awhile, she closes the book up and reaches the decision that she will be walking the caravan trails the next morning.
The next day as Ditzy is preparing to leave, Lionheart and Silver Bell try to talk to her about why she's going, Silver even offers to go with her on her travels, but Ditzy turns down the offer saying:
“No. This is something I must do alone. I need some closure, and this is the only way I know I can get it. You look so much like her.”
Okay, props to the author for that since Silver Bell was partially modeled on Dinky from the show.
And with that line that confuses Silver Bell, Ditzy leaves Junction Town on her journey.
At this point we get a feel of just how much Equestria has started to heal since Sunshine and Rainbows and the Gardens of Equestria Megaspell. Its certainly a lot greener with clean water, Equestria is definitely in a state of healing at this point. She eventually reaches the settlement of Cantervale, which was built out of the remnants of the Enclave's ships that had been downed during the conflict. They offer her a place to set up shop, but she doesn't intend to stay for long.
Eventually she reaches Gildacross and goes to sleep, that's when she finds herself dreaming of Ponyville once more. She's dreaming of Equestria during the war, and of her family. Its a good scene and shows that many ponies had this hope during the war that maybe there was still a chance of achieving peace with the Zebras. She can't take it much longer though and wakes up. There are some foals watching her, she gives them a reassuring smile and starts packing up once more.
Before she can leave however, she gets approached by a filly that's offering her a pre-war bit and asks Ditzy to help her sister. The Pegasus mare is suffering from bites and radiation poisoning, Ditzy is a bit clumsy but she does her best to heal the pony and reassured the fillies that she would be okay.
After awhile Ditzy reaches the ruins of Cloudsdale that had been hidden away by the Enclave and only recently really came to light. Ditzy remembered everything that had happened on that day, thinking back to the lives lost and the battle of Neighvarro. But she also remembers an old Cloudsdale folk song:
“Feathers from the wing
Drifting on the breeze.
Like little baby birds,
Taking flight that’s free.
Small little filly,
Take flight home soon.
Lovely little girl
Fly back home soon.”
Its a sad but beautiful scene, Ditzy is still trying to hold on to the past and you can tell that she regrets that everything had happened like it had. She makes her way through the area with her stuff, coming across a group of Applejack's Rangers that makes her go tense for a bit, but they go past her with the exception of a lilac colored Alicorn.
She is surprised when the Alicorn approaches her and seems to remember her from before the war, apparently Ditzy had delivered mail to her on several occasions. However she can't place from where and isn't even sure if the memories are her own as a result of the Unity. Ditzy sadly says that she had hoped that the Alicorn had been somepony else, the Alicorn buys a jug of purified water from Ditzy.
I have to wonder a little bit, there is some bits of this dialogue that suggests the Alicorn, Belladonna, has some remnants of Twilight's personality. I may be imagining things, but that's what I'm getting from her at least.
There's also a town coming up under the Cloudsdale ruins along with a memorial the NCR set up in honor of the ponies that had perished when the megaspell went off. Ditzy wonders if her name was on it somewhere as she heads to the town of Memoria as she continues on her journey to Ponyville.
She doesn't get much peace though as there are Vertibucks and Stratadons hovering around the town. She is startled by a landing Vertibuck, but she keeps going, thinking a bit about what she had read about them before heading into Memoria. She seems to enjoy the brief time she spends in Memoria, it reminds her of the old world as she looks around, she finds a memorial to the Wonderbolts that had died in the destruction of Cloudsdale. She checks the list of civilian names and even finds her own listed along with ponies she remembered from the war, its a sad and sobering moment.
She then comes across a pony selling pre-war artifacts including a burial urn from long before the war. She's understandably disgusted by this fact, telling the salespony that he's disrespecting the pony who had died. And then Ditzy speaks, well, as best as she can without a tongue:
“Ith unfair!!” I cried out in my dry and gravelly voice with great difficulty, my words weren’t as flexible as they used to be, but at least without my tongue I could form those words, somewhat. “Dhe dead... sood be honored!”
There is a standoff with the salespony and his associates, but it is soon disrupted when shots are fired at them, they run when they realize who shoots at them, and then Ditzy is greeted by a familiar voice.
“Bin awhile since Ah’ve seen ya out and about, Ms. Doo.”
Yep, its our old buddy Calamity. He takes Ditzy to his house and sets out a dinner for her. Ditzy asks Calamity why he was here instead of being back with Velvet, and he seems to be somewhat critical of Applejack's Rangers, saying that he's cleaning things up more than they are. He admits that he was trying to relive the glory days, he was in Memoria in order to keep an eye on the Tomb Raiding Ring that Ditzy had a run-in with.
There is also a mention of something going on in Neighvarro, apparently there's been some issues with the SPP Towers. Its possible that he had seen LittlePip in the mist, although its not clear if that was the case or his imagination. He says that he'll show the photo he had to Homage if she comes through the town, then Ditzy suggests that he goes to Tenpony tower himself and tell her, and then go back home to see Velvet and his family.
Calamity asks Ditzy where she's going now because she hadn't been on a trip like this in 15 years. She tells him that she was heading for Ponyville because she has unfinished business there. She stays the night and he leaves a note with the keys to the house, telling her to hold on to the keys until she saw him again in Junction Town. She heads out of town and continues on her way towards Ponyville.
She pauses as she approaches Ponyville there's a moment of tension when they don't immediately recognize her, but it's soon dispelled when Fluttershy recognizes her. It seems that throughout her travels she's been gathering up a lot of rads, which makes the ponies uneasy, so she agrees to back away and perform a nuclear pulse, which will burn off a lot of the excess radiation.
I'll chalk the fact that technically its magical radiation not nuclear radiation as creative license.
So Ditzy tells them why she's here and they're a bit surprised that she wants to visit a Hellhound refuge and are hesitant to let her in even after she says why. She convinces Fluttershy however and she goes to talk with the Hellhound Pack masters about allowing Ditzy in, and they agree. There's a moment where Ditzy hugs Fluttershy, she's grateful for what they're doing for them. Before going in, Ditzy gives Fluttershy one more message.
“We miss your smile and care in Junction Town, and I can see the dark under your eyes. Come home and rest, friend. Not for Velvet’s sake, but for yours. We miss you.”
As she makes her way through the town she remembers back to when she first came back to Ponyville after the bombs fell. It was horrible, ponies going hysterical and ending their lives or trying to make their way into Stable Two. Eventually they all died, leaving only Ditzy behind. Its painful for her to be back in Ponyville, she also comes across Pyrelight who was in town, presumably because Velvet sent her there to keep an eye on her.
She walks by the old Ponyville Schoolhouse as she finally nears her destination, the same old withered oak tree she had dreamed about before. She sets up an area under the tree, and, well, honestly there are no words I can say that can give it justice.
I set down my saddlebags, and took two sticks of incense and the associated holder out, and I set them aside for a moment before finally taking out the picture. I noticed the roots of the tree bulged from out of the ground in a sort of vee shape. And just near one of the roots was a large rock I thought was perfect.
I risked harming the photo, but after a quick re-check, the book stated it was done with the picture free of the frame. So I removed it and leaned it against the propped up stone. Last came the incense, which gave off a sweet smelling aroma which I was told that when lit; would calm the mind, and relax the nerves, or something like that.
As I sat under the old oak tree… I closed my eyes and remembered my dream back in Gildacross. Again, I sat with the filly and Sparkler, discussing happy times and the future.
The next part is heartbreaking, Ditzy is crying out as best she can, filled with the pain and the regret of the loss of her daughter and then her world. This particular day had been her birthday and she just wishes that she could hold Dinky in her forelegs once more. Its painful beyond belief to read, and its an amazingly well done scene.
One last breeze blew right past me. But it was warm this time, and I felt as though she was right there at my side. I looked, only there was nopony. And as the breeze, warm and gentle passed on, I closed my eyes and smiled once more, knowing my Dinky, my beloved daughter of two hundred and thirty five years ago was at peace.
In Memory Of
Dinky…
---Character Analysis: Ditzy Doo---
I'm going to be honest with you guys, and this probably won't make a lot of you happy, I'm not a huge fan of Derpy. I don't hate her mind you, but she never quite clicked with me like she does other fans... at least in the show.
That being said, I love Derpy/Ditzy Doo in Fallout: Equestria, she's one of the best portrayals of a pre-war Pony in the entirety of the fanfiction's universe. She's kind, caring, always happy to give a smile and a friendly hoof to anypony who needs it, and she never really lets the Wasteland get to her. The fact that she took Silver Bell in and then performed a sonic radboom is great, and I applaud KKat for integrating her into the fanfic like this.
And this fanfic just continues that, it feels completely natural and at the same time painful. Ditzy in this fanfic is a mother who had lost her daughter to a terrible tragedy so long ago, and so she sets out to do her best to honor Dinky's memory.
And this week I'm going to end this section with something different.
Rest in peace Dinky...
---Final Thoughts---
Dear Celestia this fanfic was hard to review...
I don't mean that in a bad way, this is one of the best fanfics I've had to review so far, quite possibly one of the best I've ever read period. Its well paced, and makes you sympathize with the main character, its a brilliantly done fanfic that feels completely natural for all the characters involved.
The thing is, its one of the saddest fanfics I've ever read. Especially as a mother myself, this fanfic hit me on an emotional level I'm not sure I was ready for. I applaud Chaos Phantasm for writing this fanfic so well that it did that however, and I don't mean any insult, I loved this fanfic and I'm glad I got to re-read it for this review.
Yeah, I didn't get to snark on this as much as I usually do, but that's because I couldn't. There are times I can't snark because the material is just too emotionally powerful and almost impossible to make any jokes about. This will probably come up a few more times, and I highly recommend anyone who likes this kind of thing to read this fanfic.
I give In Memory Of a perfect score of 5/5, I just wish I could give it a higher one.
Fallout: Equestria belongs to KKat.
In Memory Of belongs to Chaos Phantasm.
Derpy and Dinky belong to Hasbro.
Read it Here.
Next week, honestly I have no idea what to say here since it'll be Blind again, so lets just see when we get there.
Video made by me.
I am so happy to finally be able to read this, and I am equally happy to read your thoughts on it.
I was initially worried that as you reviewed it, you might have missed some of the finer details, such as Belladonna's memory mix up with the unity, Belladonna in power armor, you know? and I am ecstatic that you've brought up a lot of things I incorporated into this work, the emotion and the details, even bringing up the moment Ditzy actually tries to speak made very happy as I feel that is one of the strong moments of the fic.
I got the nuclear pulse idea from Godzilla, I could of called it a Radion Pulse or a Radiant pulse back then if I had thought of it.
Though I thought you may have had a comment on the puddle of rads left behind. 
But you know, this is a good review and I am happy to finally read it. I'm so happy you enjoyed the story.
Than you.
4345394 Well I'm glad you enjoyed it, I enjoyed reading and reviewing it, its a great fanfic and I admit I glossed over some but its better to leave things to have the readers read it for themselves.
I just have one question, where you inspired by Iroh's story from Tales of Bao Singh Se from Avatar the Last Airbender? While I was re-reading it I noticed some parallels towards the end.
4345409 Yes, The Tale of Iroh from Avatar the Last Airbender heavily influenced the fic, even in its original planning stages (long before I even read Fallout: Equestria back in 2014.) Even the song in the fic was heavily influenced by leaves from the vine. Listening to the song helped me very much through out the story's writing.
4345418 Yeah, I really liked that segment, I'm sad to admit that I didn't catch that the first time I read the fanfic but I've watched both Avatar and Korra since then so I caught them the second time through.
4345421 It's alright, it usually doesn't hit people until after a few reads.
4345436 Well it was a really well done fanfic and you where inspired by a good segment from Avatar so that helps. I swear I was actually crying while I finished the end of this review.
4345447 You enjoyed the story, and I managed to tug on heartstrings, I'd say the story succeeded. I sort of wish it was featured back in the day, but it's still perfect, even if attention for it is very low. I'm just happy that somebody has read it and enjoyed it for what it is.
4345478 Well I hope my review gets you some attention, I know at least one fic I've reviewed got some attention after I reviewed it.
4345481 I can hope. Again, thank you for reviewing it, and I'm happy you enjoyed the read.
4345491 You're welcome, I'm glad I got to review it, it gave me an excuse to read a great fanfic again.
Three years ago. Oh. My. Gosh! It's been a while.
I've been struggling like an Emu in flight with my newer (non-pony) projects that I decided to re-read some of my older works to see how I used to do things and I ended up remembering In Memory Of... got reviewed and how much I loved reading it. And so here I am.
I confess I never actually read Fo: E (neither did I finish it when I did) when I wrote this so the continuity is dodgy. The writing has a hint of omnipotence in certain parts, owing to my understanding of first-person perspectives at the time. If I redid it today, I wouldn't change much, only the title, omnipotence, continuity errors and the dialogue in keeping with every-pony's character.
Even today, I am still so happy you enjoyed and reviewed this short story.