Cannibal! The Musical (1996) · 3:53am Nov 25th, 2016
Thanksgiving is here. Diets will be blown! Party games will be played with the family. Toilets will be destroyed and then people will roll out to various stores to pillage like their barbarian forefathers did. Except, instead of gold coins or salted herring it will be for things like weird computer gizmos and clothes that don't fit.
Of course, this is also a time for giving thanks for great family, friends and favorable situations. As an addition to that list I would also like to say that I am grateful to anyone who has decided to read one of my little stories. It's nice to think that somebody took the time out of their day to spend it looking at the words I've put down here. So, thank you all very much for that.
Anyway, it's dinner time and I've got my customary pizza rolls here and a can or twelve of something fizzy. While microwaved pizza rolls may not sound appetizing they're quite a bit better than shoes or dare I say people in my opinion. Then again the characters in the next movie here may not feel the same way.
Cannibal! The Musical is the story of Alfred Packer (Trey Parker) who is on trial for the murder and consumption of his fellow travelers. They were headed to Breckinridge where gold was discovered and they hoped to strike it rich but things took a turn for the worse. Supplies are lost, the horse runs off, rivers aren't as narrow as they once were and singing and dancing breaks out at various points.
That's right. The title wasn't lying. Based on the true story of Alferd Griner "Alfred" Packer this is a musical with teeth and cannibalism. It's probably one of the singularly most glorious things that has ever come to be and benefits from the combination of Trey Parker, Matt Stone and Troma. On a budget of 125,000 dollars they put together a pretty solid little musical that's a lot of fun.
If you're a fan of South Park or just the South Park guys or Troma films this movie is worth a watch. It's interesting to see what creative people can do when they put their minds to it. Something that even the smallest of writers could look to and say, "You know maybe I can do it too." Also, like I said the movie is fun too. Give it a watch when the turkey sleep wears off. It has to be seen to be believed.
Stats: 7 dead bodies, 1 dead horse, 0 breasts, Jaw breaking, Tounge ripping, arm tearing, shot to the head, bear trap to the leg, axe to the face, neck snapping, throat eating, sticks to the eyes, eye squirting, arm beating, axe to the back, crotch shots, Japanese Indians, song fu, karate fu, dance fu and innuendo out the wazoo.
Shout outs:
Robert Muratore as Frenchy the Trapper whose song about what it means to be a trapper would make Fluttershy pass out.
Trey Parker as Juan Schwartz as Alfred Packer for the singing, writing and directing this thing.
Matt Stone for writing as well and playing James Humphrey a chronic liar.
And really everyone else involved.
Normally I'd post a preview but... it really sucks. I mean ... really sucks. So have this instead:
Lol have to check it out.
4316565 Yay!
I love reading about these crazy movies that you post about.
Nine times out of ten I come away figuring I probably wouldn't enjoy the movies, but your posts about them are awesome and hilarious.