A question regarding her daughter.

IF and understand that's a big IF I redux 'Her Daughter' what elements would you prefer I retain or what would you prefer me to discard?

Comments

[Knight N Gale]

What was it about? I've never seen or read it

[neokiva]

4315063 it was the one where Twilight was Luna's daughter, had to marry her sister because shining armour died, but wasn't really dead.

[Knight N Gale]

4315365 so it's a Luna daughter TwiDance story!?

[neokiva]

4315467 yes it was one I had removed a while back.

[Knight N Gale]

4315673 OMG YOU HAVE TO REDO IT!!!!! There aren't many good TwiDance stories out there. We need this one

[Jetflame]

My question would be Neokiva would be is What are you hoping to keep from the original it was a good story Heck was one of the first ones i proofread for you I enjoyed it for one it wasn't done whole lot Rare ship not a lot of Momma Luna fic's that I can find anyway If anything I would keep the core principle intact that you were shooting for I am more than willing to proofread and help edit it for you.

[LuminousSpark]

What I think should be changed is getting rid of the side plots involving Blueblood being turned into a mare as punishment and sent to Ponyville, as well as Spike ending up inside Celestia's womb. Those side plots made the story feel too busy, especially since it felt like they didn't have any real bearings on the overall plot or characters.

Something you should add maybe though is Twilight confronting her foster parents. You had the whole scene with Twilight feeling like they didn't care about her, but didn't follow up on it. It made me think you literally wrote that scene as just a way to keep Twilight Velvet and Night Light out of the story.