Hello! · 5:49pm Oct 21st, 2016

No, I'm not back. we just happened to stop by the Library. I'm making this blog here and now so that I can upload something that I couldn't on the small device.

For those who remember this blog: Another Story, know that I was going to post it that week. That however didn't get to happen. So today, I will finally show it to you all! Hope you enjoy it!
WARNING! For those who are prone to emotional response when reading sad stories, be warned that this is quite a tear jerker. Well, according to those I've shown it to

(* Also note, I cannot respond to my other blogs comments right now, but I will when I return home. Thanks so much!*)

Joy and Sadness by Crimsion Ink

“Must move.”

The two words were repeated relentlessly in my mind. It was all that could be thought with my condition. With the way my head was spinning as if I was on merry-go-round made it difficult to even think those two words, much less obey them. It must have been divine intervention or perhaps instinct that caused me to stumble towards the alley opening.

By some miracle I reached it, but not before I collapsed to the pavement. I was so dizzy with the pain in my chest that I hardly felt impact. No matter how much I wanted give up and die here, I knew I couldn’t. Not yet. I still had one last thing to do. I had to. I couldn’t go just yet.

Breathing heavily, I reached out my stained hand and with all the force I could muster, began to inch my way to it. In my desperate determination, I finally reached the brick wall and somehow propped my back up against it. Once I was stable and a bit more comfortable, despite the agony inside, I closed my eyes. Through the throbbing pain I managed to clear my fogging mind enough to think. Then I opened them.

Looking around, I could see it was just an ordinary, trashy, and dirty alley; opening up to a busy street crowded with frantic people. Horns blared and sirens could be heard amid the screams and shouts, all of which were now a din in the silence of my alley way. My alley. The alley where I would breath my last and quite soon.

“It least it was for a just cause,” I thought with some flicker of satisfaction, “ Perhaps now that silly child will learn not to run out into a bustling city road. I wouldn’t want any more pedestrians like myself giving their lives away for his. Oh well, there are worse ways to die I suppose.”

I gazed down at my gushing wound. I was no weak-stomache person, but this was really disgusting. Slowly, I inched my hand away from my chest. My heart didn’t like this and responded with a fresh stream of crimson liquid. Quickly I pressed against it once more. It wouldn’t be long before loss of blood would take me. But not before I completed my last earthly task. I wasn’t afraid to die, but I would have no peace until it was done. As my head started to feel lighter, I knew there was no time to waste.

Frantically, I ripped out my phone from my pocket. It was a bit of a challenge to type in the number with only one hand, but I succeed in doing it. It couldn’t help but quiver a little as I held it up to. I hoped I wouldn’t be this unsteady throught the conversation.

The familiar ringing resounded in my ear, which was already hard of hearing for the intense pressure. But I could and would tolerate the immense pain until the end for her. There was no way I could bear to let our last words together be a grieving parting. So steadying my heavy breathing and clearing my throat, I waited for her to pick up.

I only had to wait five rings before a click, followed by a a cheerful “Oh, hi Jake!”. Oh that sweet voice. It took all I had to not tear up at the thought of never hearing that voice again.

“Hey, it’s me,” I managed to say with some causality.

She chuckled, “I know it’s you silly. You’ve only called me a thousand time enough for me to know when it’s you. Boy, you can be so clingy sometimes!”

“You would be clingy to if you had the most amazing girlfriend to talk to,” I said, meaning it as a joke, but afraid there was some disdain in it. If there was, it seems she never caught it. That was just like Joy. Always assuming the best. Just another shining trait of hers.

“Oh you,” she laughed as she always did, in a contiguous sort of way that made you want to laugh along even through tears. “Jokes aside, do you want to tell me why you called?” she asked so innocently.

I was going planning to chat a while before telling her why I called, but my legs had already gone numb and the world was beginning to swim like rushing water. I closed my eyes to make it stop, but I knew it wasn’t much longer. My breathing was weaker and my head beginning to fog up again. I was running out of time.

“Well, I was just going to chat for a while. See how your day has been and tell you that I finally got the new SAO dvds-”

“You did! Really? That’s great Jake!” she interrupted enthusiastically as usual.

I couldn't help but chuckle. “Yep, and I was going to watch them with you tonight after our dinner-”

She yelled again “You are!?”

“Well, ‘was’ Joy. I’m afraid...something’s come up. I can’t make it tonight. I know how excited you were to try that new cuisine with me and how you looked forward to watching the new episode with me, but I can’t do it tonight. I’m really sorry Joy. You deserve a more reliable boyfriend than me.”

“No, no Jake, it’s fine,” she said, trying to reassure me, but I could still hear the tingle of disappointment in her voice. “Really. We can just do it another time!” The vain hope in her tone almost did me in.

“Yeah, another time.” I mumbled.

“Just...promise me you won’t watch them before me? I hate it when you spoil these things for me.”

“Sure thing ,” I chuckled and surpressed the cough threatening to burst out. To lighten the mood, I asked,“when have I ever done that?”

“Haha, like I need to remind you of the time when you completely ruined Frozen by telling me that Hans was really the villain,” she said in a playful scolding tone.

“Oh right. Well...in my defense I didn’t want you to fall in love with the guy only to have your heart c-crushed. I was looking out for you!” I managed to say before a coughing fit overtook me.

“Course you were,” she chuckled, but then in a change of tone, asked worriedly, “Are you alright Jake?”

“I-I’m fine,” I coughed out. My chest was so tight, I could barely breathe. The words felt numb on my tongue. But I couldn’t go, not yet. I had to tell her.

“Hey, Joy , sorry to cut it short, but I have to go now.”

I heard her say in that understanding way of hers,“ it’s fine. I have to go too.”

“B-but before I go. I want to tell you something. I just want you to know that...I love you. I love you with all my heart and soul. You are an amazing girl that I am so honored to have- to be the boyfriend of. Joy, you made life worth living, for which I thank you. Thank you Joy. I never say it enough and...and if I never say it again, I’ll say it now. I love you Joy. Would...you have married me Joy...if it were asked of you?”

There was silence now. I wondered if it had been too much. Then she spoke, in what sounded like an emotional, on-the-verge-of-tears, kind of tone. She said, “ I love you too Jake. I love you so much more than you could ever know. And Jake. . . I do. I would. I would marry you on the spot if I could.”

I couldn’t help it now. All the emotions came flooding out amidst my pain and fading mind. Tears flowed down and mingled with the remains of my wound. “T-thank you Joy. You don’t know how much it means to me to hear you say that,” I said, my voice shaking with happiness and sadness.

“Of course Jake,” she said before pausing. “Jake, this is all very sweet and amazing, but why say this now and over the phone?”

“Oh, no reason,” I struggled to say, gripping my chest. It’s would only be seconds now.

“You’re such a sap, you know that? A wonderful, loving sap! And I love you for it,” she said as I imagined her beaming smile.

I tried to hide the raspy sound in voice as I said weakly, “I love you too Joy.”

“Talk to you later?”

“Yeah. Good-bye Joy.” I smiled through me tears as I said those words. Soon she would realize what they truly meant.

“Good-bye Jake.” She said so kindly. There was a click and then silence. That was the last I heard of her.

I was done now.

My life like a string that at a moment would break. But I could leave happy and satisfied. My strength was gone so that I could not even lift the phone up anymore. The last thing I heard was it clanging on the concrete. The pain was gone. The tears stopped from my closed eyes. A faint smile stayed on my face. In the last few seconds of life, all I could think about was Joy.

My Joy.

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