• Member Since 3rd Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen June 2nd

Ocean Breeze


Error: Confidence_To_Write.dat not found.

More Blog Posts19

  • 212 weeks
    Done

    So I'm graduating high school on Saturday.

    Also I went to prom. Had a panic attack, left two hours early.

    Here's a photo of me there:

    3 comments · 261 views
  • 242 weeks
    Tumblr

    I launched a new Tumblr! Check it out here: Ask Ocean Breeze

    0 comments · 150 views
  • 246 weeks
    Update on Life

    September 29th, 2016


    So as you may or may not remember, back on February 15th of 2015, I announced my departure from MLP and FiMFiction communities. Well, I think I'll take that back. I have for the most part returned to FiMFiction, rereading fics I enjoyed in the past while I catch up on three missed seasons and three movies of ponies.

    So where does this leave me?

    Read More

    2 comments · 255 views
  • 330 weeks
    My Current Thoughts

    February 15th, 2015.

    Hey everyone that may or may not be reading this. It's been six weeks since I've logged in. And that was just to see if I had messages.

    Read More

    0 comments · 235 views
  • 372 weeks
    Blog - Source Filmmaker

    April 27, 2014 12:40 PM

    Source Filmmaker

    I've been animating a lot recently. Here's something that I made (that's shitty):

    Other things? Well, I prefer making still images in SFM. I've also been working in 3DS Max 2012 recently, too.

    Read More

    0 comments · 319 views
Sep
29th
2016

Update on Life · 5:36am Sep 29th, 2016

September 29th, 2016


So as you may or may not remember, back on February 15th of 2015, I announced my departure from MLP and FiMFiction communities. Well, I think I'll take that back. I have for the most part returned to FiMFiction, rereading fics I enjoyed in the past while I catch up on three missed seasons and three movies of ponies.

So where does this leave me?

For a long time now, I've been a decent fan of Five Scores Divided by Four. I like the idea, the concept of it, but not necessarily some plot points. Despite this I have recently been working on a modified FSDBF concept fic. It's on the first chapter and about 1800 words in and shaping up decently. I still consider my writing to be bad as I struggle with it, but however I have been told and even believe myself that it's gotten much better than when I originally started. Here's a small tidbit of it:

"

“Ocean, you really shouldn’t go out in that storm. It looks really bad.”

“Relax, Grey. I’ll be fine. I wouldn’t go out if my patrol number wasn’t called up. But really, I’ve handled plenty of storms like this.” I reassured my husband.

“Okay, just… promise me you’ll come back home tonight? I want the foals to be able to have their mother sing them to sleep. I would, but you know how bad I am at it.”

"

I don't believe I ever mentioned this publicly but here's some info about me:

When I joined FiMFiction.net, I was the ripe age of 12. Sounds pretty young, right? Over the past four and a half years, I've made tons of friends within the FiMFiction community and most importantly on the #TCB IRC channel to which I attribute the most of my personality development/general development as a human being. The users there are some of the best people I've ever had the pleasure to talk to. Sure, we've had our qualms but we've also been there for each other and I couldn't ask for better friends. About a year after I started pursuing ponies, in my eighth grade year, I met a girl through my band class. We quickly became good friends and skyped frequently over the next few years.

Flash-forward to my sophomore year of high school, she and I started dating. It was amazing, I had never felt better to be around someone. I genuinely loved her and still do. In late November of last year, I noticed my dad had started staying home from work more and more. I questioned him about it and he told me he had no longer been employed by that company. I'm not sure entirely about the details, but I think I've worked it out that he had been laid off.

I wasn't panicked. He had 25 years of IT work under his belt and had worked the last 8 as an IT manager. As time went on, things got a bit worse. We lost one of our cars due to being behind on payments (which honestly was fine because the transmission dropped on it and it would've been a $2000 repair for a $4000 car).

June and July of 2016 was the worst period of my life. In early June, our landlord evicted us due to not paying rent for three months. He was extremely kind and gave us three months time to try to make payments and he understood our situation. However, it was his property and if no money was rolling in there was no point in owning the property. I can understand the reasons he chose to evict us.

Things got worse after that. My aunt and uncle graciously allowed us to move in under their roof. They have a family of four and we have a family of six as well as four dogs. My older sister moved in with her boyfriend which freed us up on space. The dogs however were different. Our rat terrier/beagle mix was taken in by my grandparents six hours away. Our three chihuahuas (only one of which I enjoy) were taken in by a family friend that lived near by. We got the opportunity to visit them frequently and it was nice.

Since early June I had noticed my relationship was deteriorating with my girlfriend. She was becoming more and more distant and changing as a person. It honestly really bothered me. It got to the point where, and this may sound silly, she refused to hold my hand in public. Our last good day was on my birthday, June 20th. We were so happy that day and it was perfect. I thought we had just been through a rough patch and we were getting over it.

July 3rd was a terrible night. She and I were set to go to an Independence Day celebration the next day. I had a generally shitty day and while talking to her on Skype blew up at my brother. This started an argument that ended our relationship. I told her I couldn't handle any of it anymore and that we were done. She was my best friend and I loved her.

The next few days I felt fine, I had cooled down and started messaging her as I didn't want to lose her as a friend. As time went on, the pain in my heart got worse and worse. Some nights I just cried. I felt so dirty begging for her to take me back but she refused due to my ending of the relationship. I kept having dreams of her and still do. I can't look her in the face without getting depressed.

Around July 28th, we got news that the caretaker of our chihuahuas couldn't support them anymore. They now live with another family friend in Indiana, about three hours from here. I miss them all dearly.

As of today, my dad has gone through countless interviews and we are still living with my aunt and uncle. My family feels so fragmented. To make things worse, I'm in my senior year and applying to colleges. I really want to go but honestly I don't know how I'd afford it. I got a job at a plant nursery in July and have been using my paychecks to fund college applications. Luckily due to my test scores, some schools have waived application fees. It helps but tuition is still a thing. My dream school is the University of Ottawa in Ontario.

I'm doing fine now, to say the least. I've got my friends at my side supporting me and I couldn't be more thankful. I cherish them daily and couldn't ask for a better bunch both online and offline. I've sunk more time back into video games and ponies now that I have no relationship to maintain.

If you want to see my artwork that I've been working on as well (which has taken a turn for the better in terms of quality), then check me out here.

I know many people don't read these. This is more or less a way for me to vent some feelings. If you have questions, feel free to ask away.

Report Ocean Breeze · 255 views · #life
Comments ( 2 )

"... to which I attribute the most of my personality development/general development as a human being. "


I am Sorry. I am So So Sorry.

:rainbowlaugh:

Login or register to comment