The Hat Man Reviews! [The "Negotiations" Series] · 9:16pm Sep 5th, 2016
Ah, "The Conversion Bureau." Along with the "Displaced" genre and "Anon" stories, Conversion Bureau stories are a type of story I generally dislike. There are exceptions, but they're pretty few and far between. As in I've read exactly one story in each of these categories where I've had neutral to positive feelings about. The subject of this review is less of a Conversion Bureau story and more of a so-called "deconstruction" of the genre. Fillies and gentlecolts, ladies and gents, I give you my review of...
The "Negotiations" Series by Rated Ponystar
So, first of all, what the fizzy duck is "The Conversion Bureau" you might ask? Long and short, the basic elements are this:
Equestria appears in the human world, and a barrier around it slowly overwrites Earth. No human can survive beyond the barrier, so the only way to survive is to be "converted" into ponies. The organization responsible for this is the titular Conversion Bureau. The covertees are called "Newfoals."
Now, there's a bit of range in these stories. The original story was a not-that-great tale with interesting ideas and poor execution. It was also criticized for making Equestria overly idealized and Earth overly awful. Some stories have taken this route, others have turned it on its head and made ponies evil invaders, and thus many TCB stories center around a war between ponies and humans.
"Negotiations" is not about this conflict, but rather the aftermath. As a short bit of background, the ponies have been zealously converting humanity, believing they were "saving" them from their awful, violent nature. The result of this conflict was a few billion human deaths, a division among the ponies, and a counterattack which subsequently cost the lives of a large portion of the cast. In the end, once the barrier was removed, the ponies lost. Twilight starts off the first story negotiating the surrender of Equestria to the human forces. While doing so, she muses about the past and what led her to such a point:
I hadn’t thought such horrible weapons could be made. I researched their bloody history and figured that this alone was enough for us to change their ways. Make them just like us and introduce them to the concept of friendship and harmony.
...What we didn’t expect was such resistance and eventual distrust. That was why Princess Celestia said we had no choice but to force them. If they could not accept our harmony by their own free will and be taught a different path from their destructive ways, then we had to convert them to ours to save them.
It seemed so simple back then, especially with the barrier protecting us from harm and slowly taking over the Earth, but it was gone. Now we were the losers, and they were the winners. We were just trying to save them... but I guess they didn’t want to be saved.
I don't want to spoil much, but there's a realistic discussion of post-war plans and what to do about Celestia, who is in a coma after pushing her magic to the limit trying to stave off humanity's attacks. After the first story, "Negotiations," each subsequent story tells of other events after the surrender, most narrated by Twilight. In order, they are:
1. "Negotiations"
2. "Reunited"
3. "Truth"
4. "Useless"
5. "Rest"
6. Another, reportedly the last one in the series, TBA
Each story is a one-shot, but they all go together in sequence. I honestly am not sure why they aren't combined into just one big story, but I don't suppose it really matters.
One of the things I dislike about Conversion Bureau stories is that I have a hard time sympathizing with either side, and their general dark tone. War stories don't generally interest me, so chalk that up to my own taste.
While "Negotiations" is dark - very dark, but not gory - it does a good job depicting the best and worst on both sides and actually providing more of a reason for Equestria's appearance on Earth. While it's hard to imagine Twilight as ever being on the side of genocide, by shifting the majority of the blame onto Celestia, it almost becomes believable. Almost. I still have to complain that I just don't see a lot of the characters acting as they do or blindly following Celestia, or Celestia herself being the new Equine Hitler.
But the story isn't really concerned with the past, but going forward. It's a story about reconciliation and forgiveness, but also about those who can't offer or accept either of those things. It asks the question, "How do individuals, and society as a whole, move on after an atrocity?" This brings up parallels with post-war Germany and Japan (and having lived in Japan, this aspect of the series struck a nerve), and other nations to boot.
While I have a hard time seeing Twilight ever being a war hawk, I can imagine her being a good leader to help negotiate peace. Many other characters are written well too, like Spike, Fluttershy, and even a brief appearance by Discord. The drama and emotion feel genuine (with a few cringe-worthy exceptions) and Ponystar's writing style is plain, conversational, but still highly engrossing. The stories are very addictive. The tragedy of things gone by and the reality of loss are quite heart-wrenching.
On the negative side of things, these stories are almost too sad at times. Maudlin, even. Twilight mopes a lot, and while I can't blame her, by the time we get to "Rest," she has been so focused on atonement that she does something very stupid that broke me out of my suspension of disbelief. There are also some small things that bug me:
-A crack about Jehova's Witnesses in the first chapter (minor, but the fact that they were compared to the brainwashed newfoals irks me [and no, I don't want to start a flame war about it, so you may consider it my personal complaint and leave it at that]).
-Sunset Shimmer was sent as a scout to Earth and instead of going to Canterlot High, she gets - get this - killed and eaten by Bushmen. That's just... seriously, what are the odds?! 
-Flash Sentry and Twilight dated during the war, but Flash disagreed with the policy on humanity and broke up with Twilight. And married Lyra. Spike never shows any hostility toward anyone else who defected and hurt Twi in the process, but he regards Flash as unforgiveable. (And I thought those who cry "waifu-stealer" were hard on the guy.)
Still, overall I think these stories are pretty darn good. A bit depressing, but definitely intriguing. The depiction of a post-war Earth and Equestria on a political and personal level caught my interest from the get-go and kept me coming back. Most of the emotional moments feel right, and while I personally never cried, I think this is bound to be a tear-jerker for some, and I won't lie that the most recent chapter did give me a bit of a lump in my throat.
I think that this story does a good job of taking apart the Conversion Bureau as a genre of stories. It isn't overly favorable to either side (though it does take the side of the humans more than the ponies), and it focuses on the right characters without it becoming a vehicle for someone's OC to sing the praises of the pony way or become an unmitigated badass savior of humanity. It takes an otherwise unbelievable premise and makes it easier to swallow without sugar-coating the concepts.
Ultimately, I doubt I'll ever like TCB stories in general, but it's nice to have one story I can point to as an exception.
Recommended?: Yes. Mostly. If you dislike dark, tragic stories or can't stand to see any of the main cast as war criminals, then you won't like it. If you can take such things, then you may find it more enjoyable.
Thanks for reading, and I'll see you next time!
I hadn't realized that the "Conversion Bureau" stories were so controversial. I've been avoiding them just because I can't really enjoy the idea of people being forced to become ponies... But then, I'm one who wouldn't want to become a pony. Readers who would like to become ponies probably like such stories.