Here's what happened yesterday. · 7:09pm Aug 4th, 2016
I wanted to call a friend, telling them about how I've been feeling pretty shitty lately. They didn't pick up, but I needed to do something to feel a bit better. That's when I finished my hooch. Half a juice bottle, to be exact. I started to feel the buzz, but it still didn't feel like enough. That's when I decided to call whiskey for help, too. And then I had three shots of vodka. You see, I come from a judgmental family, and that made me scared shitless of people's judgement. People judge, but liquor doesn't. You can tell her just about anything.
Around five, I had to help my little brother cook dinner. We were going to have puttanesca pasta, my favorite. I tried my best to help, but to no avail. I had trouble peeling the garlic, I struggled to cut the olives, and I failed miserably at getting some parsley from the front yard. A couple of times, I felt so terrible that I lay down on the kitchen floor. My brother was pissed and wouldn't let me help since I couldn't do anything. I started to post on here.
Come dinner, I had trouble serving myself and could hardly eat a thing. I felt sick to my stomach. I left to pee, but I guess I was gone a long time? My dad asked if I was OK. I couldn't finish, so I decided to wrap my plate. My little brother ended up doing it for me.
After that, I felt sick and scared. I felt like I was going to die. I groaned in pain and sounded like a sick porn star or some shit. I ended up puking. Twice. I couldn't feel it, so that's a plus!
I texted my friend from Jesus camp, telling him that I puked. Then he was super concerned and called me. He demanded my address so he could call an ambulance for me. I refused. I begged and cried so he wouldn't call an ambulance. My parents would be pissed and word would get around that I was a drunk. I promised him that I'd be sober by nine.
Since I refused the ambulance, his mom ended up calling me. It seemed like she was an alcoholic because she kept telling me that she knew from experience what I was going through. She got me to call one of my friends so she could watch me. I ended up spending the night at her place. I went there in a t shirt, boxers, and a robe. I was quite a sight. I forgot to bring a phone charger, I packed three pairs of underwear, and I think I may have stolen my friend's toothpaste. There were a few other girls at her house. We ended up skinny dipping in her pool and it was pretty fun. Then we went up to my friend's room and they drunk vodka and this beer that smelled like soy sauce. I didn't want to drink anymore. We ended up talking shit, and my friend described her passionate love for cranberry juice and her hate for Cheetos. She said, "If you like Cheetos, or you are a Cheeto, just fuck you, fuck you man Cheetos are just fuck you".
Thankfully, I survived the night. I got three hours of sleep, but that is to be expected when you get that drunk. This is a PSA of why you shouldn't drink when you're sad. I love you, guys! Stay safe!
4132083 If you mean masturbation, it's OK. It's natural, healthy, and a lot of people do it, myself included.
Although I do it so much that it probably isn't healthy. So far I've gone two days without it.
4132435 Masturbation is proven to relieve stress, and for women on their periods, it can relieve cramps. It's nothing to be ashamed of.
4132443 Different sides come out? Tell me more. I think I know someone with something like this...
4132453 Ohhh ok
4132467 I'm a bit eccentric as well.