Obligatory Post-con Post, starring ROBDrunkran53 · 2:23am Jul 18th, 2016
I got back home from Trotcon about 5 hours ago, and I'm finally all settled in and catching up on all the music that came my way over the weekend. :) It was a good time. Let's tell a story. (It's gon b loooong)
If you don't know, I've been to every Trotcon since it started. I was actually in the room when the very first one was announced (and they tried to send the announcement to EQD only to find out Canterlot Gardens had been posted within the hour c.c). So it's kind of a familiar scene for me now, despite two venue changes. I had made up my mind about two things this Trotcon:
1) My aesthetic would be low-key. I brought one pony shirt, because it just happened to be near the top of my drawer, and I put two whole pins on my hat instead of all of them. (I have 31 pony pins, and I usually wear them all at once at cons.)
2) My approach to the con would be to set up in a public place with my laptop and read my printed copy of Through the Well of Pirene.
Apologies to Ether Echoes, but I only got through a chapter and a half. :B But it turns out, this was the right thing to do. I had no plans -- I hadn't even looked at a schedule before arriving at the hotel -- and instead just let the con happen to me, and happen it did.
But let's start from the beginning. Me and my buddy Max -- the person who takes me everywhere and also introduced me to Kamen Rider, not to mention MLP itself -- left Kent around 11 AM and got to Columbus right before 1. We did not, however, go straight to the hotel: no, we were looking for robots, so our first stop was High Street (where the con was held two years ago, fyi). I somehow missed Big Fun on the way up, which meant circling back, parking in the first spot we could find, and hiking eleven blocks in the sweltering heat like we said we weren't gonna do this year.
(This, incidentally, is why I fear I may have been a little stinky on Friday. :( Sorry.)
Long story short, I had a little spending money, so I got one of these and one of these. A good time was had. We went to the hotel.
The con happened almost immediately thereafter. I do believe the first person I saw was Professor Oats, who informed me that the writing panel was happening right the fuck then, more or less. I said sure, might as well do that, so we went and heckled. I was blamed for something, I don't recall what, but I was mightily indignant, let me tell you. :V A good time was had.
I guess I'd better just get the URLs out of the way right now. The people I can remember hanging out with, in no particular order:
Admiral Biscuit
Bad Horse
Zyrian
Uncreative, who I immediately forgot after meeting because I'm a terrible person D:
Kaldanor, who I hadn't seen in two years because he was sick last Trotcon
Morning Sun
Trick Question
Protopony
MD Quill (sweet shitting fuck you are impossible to search for)
A guy named Milk? Oh wait, he's Mikesnipe, thank you Flutterpriest :3
Some other guy whose name I can't even guess at
Notably absent was Jason the Human. :( He was missed.
And that doesn't include any of the non-writers, many of whom I possibly did not get names of. God, I hope I didn't forget anyone. D:
Purposefully not included is the inimitable ROBCakeran53. As you may have guessed from the title, I have a story to tell about him. :3
If you have not been to a con and/or met Rob there, do yourself a favor and try. He is a really great guy, lots of fun to be around, and you can always learn something new from talking to him, even if it mostly falls into the category of "People still use those?" He looks like Mario -- no like, three people within earshot independently described him thusly over the course of the weekend -- wearing a bunch of Big Mac paraphernalia, not to mention his ever-present plaid hat. Also ever-present is his favored drink, the Sunkist and Jack.
Rob got super fucked-up on Friday, is what I'm saying.
At some point, Zyrian, Oats, Rael (aka Kaldanor) and I went out for Chinese because hungry. Instead of hitting the really awesome place that Max says is amazing, we went to a hole in the wall that served the exact same food as a place down the street from me. Point being, about two hours later, people were talking about having a big dinner somewhere and a few of us decided to come along anyway. We were going to the same pub we had visited last year, out in Worthington, about a ten-minute drive from the hotel.
Bad Horse was, rightly, concerned that Rob was sitting in the seat of his car, ready to transport six individuals plus himself to certain doom. So Zyrian pulled his keys.
Thus began the Great Trek to Milk's Car (I'm calling him Milk, I guess), which involved us walking all the way around the hotel while Rob loudly questioned why we were walking and proclaimed he was "not walking to the restaurant", while completely missing all explanations of our goal. It was hilarious.
It got more hilarious once Milk opened his car up. It was some kind of jeepy thing, with a small hatchback trunk and a pair of seats he pulled up from the floor. Once we had convinced Rob that this was our new mode of transport, he flung himself into the trunk seat. Like, just bodily dove into this car and remained there, unmoving, his legs hanging over the back of the seats. From what I hear, he made the drive to the pub wearing a hard hat.
I rode across the nation with Bad Horse. :V
Dinner was fun, though we had to eat outside because large group, and apparently in Worthington, you can't be served alcohol outside unless the eating area is fenced in. Strange rule, upset a few people somewhat, but thankfully Rob became increasingly more sober as he told us about how many of his cars just don't have brakes. I mean, who needs those?
I don't remember if anything else happened that night. (I was relating all this to my mother earlier, and I swear I attended a panel and then immediately forgot about it.)
The next morning saw me actually get some reading in. It was nice. I had also brought a few things with me to give away: three blind boxes that were duplicates of things I already had, plus two custom painted G3 blind bags that I had gotten at the very first Trotcon and decided I no longer wanted (and couldn't sell on eBay). Over the course of maybe half an hour, the "TAKE ONE" sign led to a lot of "Are you really giving these away?" Yes, I was. And it felt good; the first guy who approached me was just super-fucking-excited because he got a Scootaloo. Like, that felt good. :) And I got rid of the G3s by claiming that Surprise would be lonely without her tiger/dragon/pony friend. (Thanks to Admiral Biscuit and Spirit Arts: their shipping gave me the idea!)
I think this might have been when I went to the thing I forgot. :B Like, it's literally just such a mental block that I can't remember anything. I was determined not to hit the vendor hall until Sunday, and I think I spent most of Saturday sitting around, talking to people. At some point, Max and I went up to our room with Bad Horse and Oats in tow, to try out a four-pack of sodas Max got from PixelKitties. Long story short, pop was drunk, Max gagged on some Reed's Jamaican Ginger Beer because he is a wuss, and BH and Oats were introduced to the exploits of our crazy friend Garrett along with this:
I've seen that video three times, and I still can't believe it's real. <.< They had similar reactions. Bad Horse was impressed that the toy version actually looks like the belt in the show.
(Fun fact: I accidentally copy-pasted the video for The Goof Off from Pinkie Pride in there. The comment still kind of makes sense. <.<)
Lunch was Waffle House (I've never understood the hype over that place) with Zyrian and crew, which involved lots of people crammed into Rob's jeep because hey, guess who still had the keys?
At some point, Zyrian gets a call, and it's Rob, and he's mad. It goes something like this.
Z: "I'm sorry I stole your car, I'll bring it back."
R: "I don't care about that."
Z: "Are you hungover?"
R: "No. Maybe."
Poor Rob, though. He slept in till like 11 and was majorly hungover all day. By the time we all went out for dinner -- at this 50's themed diner that had fucking church pews for booths, I swear to god, my ass still hurts ;_; -- it was obvious he wasn't having a good time at all, so conversation turned to things like racial jokes and reddit writing prompts.
That night, there were things to do! Deimos Foxx was running a script-reading panel again, and it was tremendous fun as usual, thanks especially to a spot-on Cheech Bloom leading the charge through Appleoosa. (Also, screaming Braeburn and crowd antics.) About an hour later, everyone lined up for the after dark vendor hall, whoa-ho-ho!
Okay, so, all day I'd been hearing horror stories about the AA. "So and so went in and saw such and such and they screamed and ran out!" Stuff like that.
Those people are goddamn casuals. I've written worse shit than anything I saw in there. <.< I went for the experience -- again, trying not to buy all the things -- but I was severely let down. I told a guy Pinkie's pussy looked okay, and talked to MD for like ten seconds, then left. The worst part of the whole thing was standing in line, because that just felt shameful.
(Okay, but the good stories involved MA Larson ducking in, pointing at something, and someone else buying it for him later, and a drunken GM Berrow complimenting Braeburned on his ability to draw, err, man-juice.)
Saturday night ended up being a sad redo of Friday night. I don't think I mentioned it yet, but both nights, I went to bed at midnight for stupid reasons; this is usually acceptable, it's a con and all. But not when I get up at six fucking AM both goddamn mornings. D: I was taking melatonin! I should have been able to sleep in! I should at least have been guaranteed seven hours! But no. I was horribly stressed by this, but thankfully, as of writing this, I haven't had any terrible repercussions. Here's hoping.
Sunday was, as always, considerably more low-key. I went to the vendor hall finally, with a self directive to Buy All The Shipfic Cards. Apparently, Twilight Sparkle's Secret Shipfic Folder isn't being printed by the creators, but they released some stuff that allows people to create their own, with permission to print. I ended up getting... geez. An R63 pack, the official cards from Ask King Sombra, a set from the season five canon AU, and Boiler No. 3's Fallout: Equestria and Project Horizons packs. <.<
I'd been seeing so much Littlepip and Blackjack merch around the con all weekend, I was getting afraid that I would blow my (bumped up thanks to a couple people) budget on FoE stuff I didn't need. <.< So I compromised with that last one there. Not to mention I follow Boiler and was really looking forward to them anyway. I've read through all the cards, and the quality is variable; I smell power creep, which is always the way things go with fan variants, but also that AU pack contained, like, just writing. Like, the whole draw of TSSSF is excerpts from ridiculous, cheesy shipfics that don't exist. But that one's just got writing? I think the artist missed the point. (Meanwhile, Boiler had plenty of laughs and at least two cards that were like, seriously good writing. c.c Like, I would read those stories in a heartbeat because they sound super-good.)
I ended up spending a lot of money, but not all of it, because my family was depending on me to bring Tim Hortons donuts home! >:B
The rest of the day was mostly just a repeat of Saturday, sitting around, bullshitting with folks, and also spending a lot of time awkwardly trying to figure out if/when we were/were not leaving. I played a couple rounds of Uno with Rob and some other folks (every time he dealt someone into the game, he'd immediately get hit with a draw two), and it was just quiet fun. Goodbyes were eventually said, but there were no regrets. I got the donuts. Here are a couple other highlights:
- Those guys with the pony-colored Halo Spartan armor were back. If you haven't seen them, the costumes are fantastic, and the helmets are enclosed, so they have digitized radios that let them speak. So imagine this big dude in purple space marine armor marching up to somewhere and saying in his digital robot voice, "I want cookies."
- A guy named Chef Joe brought a digeridoo. If not for the dude shredding heavy metal outside con ops in the evening, this would have been Didgericon.
- Didgeridude did at least provide one of the best moments of the con for me: Waiting to get into the script reading, talking to Drew Flashy and (I think) Animated James, he comes by, playing his 'doo, and some guy starts heckling him, so he blows a raspberry through it. Then he gets himself ready to start playing again, and this older guy walks past and the end of the didgeridoo brushes against his armpit, like, right at the same time he starts playing. The guy goes "WHOO!" and jumps, and everyone in line died laughing, it was amazing and the perfect opening act.
- Also, imagine the harmonica riffs from Appleloosa's Most Wanted being played by a didgeridoo.
- I totally skipped out on both writer-oriented room parties, but the first was after I went to sleep and the second was after we left. I suppose I do have one regret, then. :( Just want to let folks know they weren't being snubbed.
- I did not write a con fic like I kept threatening to. I currently have two newly-started fics open, but they'll have to wait for tomorrow.
- I had very pleasant, if short, conversations about Fallout: Equestria, et. al., with not one but two people. I have to assume neither of them knew who I was. <.<
- Biscuit gave me five dollars Canadian. It's shiny, see-through funny money! :D
That's about all I have time for/can remember, I think. Apologies to anyone I left out. I swear the weekend just flew by, though. And now I really need to get some sleep before I die. x.x
Our money is hilarious.
I think I was the one who told Rob you were going to be there, all alone.
So you may have me to blame for that.
Hah! Sunday night at Bronycon, the last thing we did was hang out with much of the writer crew in Trixie's (Trick-someone, I think. Her real middle name is Trixie though) room. When we were finagling money for pizzas, and breaking things down so everyone who wanted some got some and paid, Biscuit pulls out Canadian "funny money" (It melts in your car on a sunny day!). We pass it around and laugh at it.
EDIT: I'm pretty sure he showed us some other odd monies that he had in there.
Then someone asks if we can break a hundred. We all look at each other. Biscuit whips out his wallet again.
Moral of the story: Biscuit is magic and manifests money if you squeeze him right.
Okay, but even theoretically, how much better that that can you get?
One of my favorite moments from the con was sitting at that big round table with you guys on Saturday, and hearing Bad Horse and the woman who was sitting with us (did not get her name) have a super intellectual conversation about writing that went completely over my head while my sister browsed dank memes on her phone.
Milk is Mikesnipe - Admin of the Good HiE List.
hory shit
I can't breathe
Zyrian needs to upload stuff and you have Timmies in your area?
We need a con over here in Atlanta that's pony focused.
Or maybe a pony panel at DragonCon or MomoCon. Otherwise, I'm never going to hobble my ass out to see anyone.
4098767
Hey, he worked hard for that recognition!
4098825 make your way down to Florida for the grand Brony gala.
4098698
She's Trick Question on fimfic. Yeah, cuz people were calling her Trixie, I kept on getting her confused with bookplayer's kid for a bit. Hurr durr.
He pulled out four Canadian $5 bills cuz I had asked if anyone at that party had change so I could pay for some za (I was holding out a Canadian $20 bill). Of course, this was all a joke n all, so I wasn't expecting anyone to give me change, let alone change in Canadian. I kinda regret not asking Biscuit to actually do it. At least one of those fives was an older version, made of actual paper instead of plastic. Those ones are much better at being accepted into the bill acceptors of vending machines and self checkouts. It is like super frustrating trying to jam that plastic paper into machines repeatedly at times.
Also, hi. I'm the guy who sat at the same table as you at the writer's dinner last year who confused storks for pelicans, bringing about frightening and hilarious imagery of Luna as a pelican. Yeah, watching YouTube videos of pelican eating habits is scary. Especially the neck wiggling thing they use to kill things they swallow. Absolutely delightful.
Now imagine pelican Luna doing that :B
UPDATE: I SLEPT TWELVE HOURS LAST NIGHT GOD DO I FEEL AWFUL
4098698
I believe this
4098734
Ah! I heard that list mentioned in his presence. I will have to make that change, thank you. :)
4098821
By his own admission, he writes one story a year. :V And no, I do not, so I have to drive 2 hours to Columbus once a year to get any. XD
4098923
TQ was Trixie long before Trixieplayer (Booktrixie?) She even predates the show's Trixie, can confirm. :V
4099368 Nooo he took the typewriter pages from BC and said he'd scan and upload theemmmmmm
4099575
ohh :B
I can't read this whole blog. It makes me too sad knowing that I didn't go when I totally could have.
4099719
Aw shit, I'm sorry you didn't. :(
If you remember our conversation on the topic of my licence plate:
You did this to me!
Now to wait for the activation email that is taking far longer than it should.
Those are some mighty fine robots you've got there! Particularly that Good Knight
Are you sure you went to a panel you don't remember? It would've been during those precious few moments when I wasn't stalking you
I'm gonna try to post about the con after work tomorrow
4100724
Now get clopping :V
4100797
Man, like, what panels did I go to? Writers panel, script reading... I swear there was a third, but maybe not. I think the only other line I stood in all weekend was the Line of Shame to get into AAAD.
"I'd been hearing horror stories about the AA."
Based on the previous conversation, I momentarily thought you had taken Rob to Alcoholics Anonymous.
4101190
Maybe I should have.