TRUMPERT · 4:14pm Jun 24th, 2016
My name is Trumpert. I have decided to run for President of the United States. I’ve really bad hair and have a double chin. I’m wearing a baseball cap and a navy blue suit. I am about 70 years old right now. I’ve been my favorite person in the whole wide world ever since the 1980s! My really bad hair is orange and is combed over. I’m a very loud, boisterous man who verbally threatens people and calls them names. I HATE ETHNIC GROUPS! At one point I saw a black guy in the audience and said, ‘‘Look at My African American over here!’’ You could tell I’d follow that sentence with the words, ‘‘Isn’t my African American cute, eating his watermelons and fried chicken and all that?’’
Anyways, let’s talk about the folks I’ve had the pleasure – or displeasure – of running with. First let’s talk about Lyin’ Teddin. Teddin lied, lied, lied to me all the time. Little Markin can’t even get the job done and has a small thing tucked below his pants that neither I nor anybody else should ever have brought up. And don't even get me started on Lowest-Energy Jebbinson! In my opinion, I am strong and the others are weak. Which alone makes me incredibly self-indulgent.
I want to make this country great again. It’s part of my motto. I HATE MEXICO! I HATE MUSLIMS! I WANT TO BUILD THIS WALL AND MAKE THEM PAY FOR IT! BUT THEY ARE SO POOR THAT THEY WON’T BE ABLE TO! GAAAH!
Anyways, in the end, I’ve won me the Party Nomination! My fellow Republicans are agitated by this and are now going to vote Libertarian. Me: ):<
Anyways, that’s the story of me . . .
TRUMPERT
Is it too late to send Trump back to Loompaland?
4046383 This is a parody of Donald Trump and borrows a lot from his life and satirizes various aspects of it, including his remark about ''my African American over here.'' I don't think it is too late to send him back to Loomaland - or maybe to THE APPRENTICE - or maybe even to his casinos.
4046861 it is.