Apr
4th
2016
I am tired of losing friends. · 3:22am Apr 4th, 2016
Today I lost another friend to unexpected illness. That is two in as many weeks.
I am tired. I am sick myself. I am watching two family members suffer as they go to hospitals and emergency rooms on and off. I cannot take care of those I care about, and can barely take care of myself. And in the end, I am ultimately helpless to all of it.
I am so, so tired of feeling beaten down by death and loss.
Do me a favor. None of you fuckers die over the next few weeks. Just put it off a little.
For my sake, if nothing else.
And keep your friends close. Have you told them you care today?
Because you fucking should.
-Pencil
Darn, that's really sad. May you live in peace.
I'LL DIE IF I WANT TO, MOM.
No but seriously, sorry for the loss(es). Shit can be rough.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Be well, anonpencil.
Hey. I care about you. You make my life better.
I'll give Death an extra punch in the dick for you.
Oh, and hugs for you as well.
No promises, but i'll try.
3846789 And as for you, this is like the third I have seen you change you profile pic. This seems to be an epidemic lately.
Oh God...
*hugs*
My condolences to you.
Stay strong.
I'll stay healthy and strong for you man.
Well, hopefully you can make it through, stronger than you where before! And don't worry, I don't plan on dying anytime soon.
Uh. I suppose now would be a bad time to say why I was coughing up blood?.....heh.
A-anywaays apparently if you smoke 2 packs a day and drink whenever you have the least bit of alone time for 30 years straight then it ends up being bad for the lungs and your liver and just about everything else really.
So yea I can hold off death for another 3 years!
After that though then you speak to a Ascended One.....maybe I doubt it. I've been told that I should've died when I jumped off that bridge but I'm still fucking here......GG God!!!! Gg...
There's no need to worry about your friends Pencil. Think of it this way. You'll see them again sometime or another. And they're not suffering anymore. Hell, they could even have been reborn as something else. Maybe a pet had babies or something like that. Regardless, I'm still rooting for you. Also, I can promise my own safety. That's the Team Amethyst guarantee.
Hey, man. Be strong, please. For all of us. There's always something that we cannot change. There's always something that hit to the weakest, most painful spots. But there's also something that worth for fighting and struggling. Sometimes it can't be seen from the place we are now, but it IS. All of us fighting our own battles, yes, but sometimes that's what you need for not losing everything: just the knowledge that someone still stand to the End. And even if the time to leave comes, there's no way to just give up, cause someone's looking to you with hope. Die hard — is the best what we can do for you in exchange of you doing the same. For us. All of us.
And again, sorry for my crappy english. Be strong, man.
Fuck Pencil, I can't fathom how awful you must feel right now.
We might not have met personally, but I (along with everyone else here) wish you the best right now. We might not have known each other that long and you might not even feel the same way I do, but I'm telling you that I fucking care about you, you funny, wonderful, twisted, shit-posting goddess.
You've made me smile almost every day since I first met you. It sounds cheesy, but it's true! You might have done it through a story, or a comment or through something else entirely, but I hope I can make you smile for once. Only seems fair...
I cannot promise that I won't die over the next few weeks, because life isn't a guarantee. However, I can certainly promise to try and not die.
That's pretty much what I've been doing for the past 2-4 years, actually: My overwhelming fear of nonexistence drives most of my 'will to survive', as well.