Friendship is Card Games: The Crystalling · 11:42am Mar 27th, 2016
And so my quest begins anew. Let's get to it... after a few thoughts on the Season 5 finale, since I saw the tail end of it prior to the premiere.
• I only just realized that Twilight managed to make a friendship bond with Starlight during and because of the Rainboom. That’s actually pretty clever.
• Oath of the Gatewatch has unveiled something amusing: Starlight has colorless mana symbols for a cutie mark. Appropriate for both an empty philosophy and someone who's reconstructing her whole belief system.
• I loathed “Friends Are Always There For You” when I first saw it, but now, after months of adapting to the idea of Starlight’s reformation, not seeing her commit omnicide, and listening without watching, it actually brought a tear to my eye. Interesting how one’s reaction can shift given context.
Now, onto more current matters:
Multiple months have definitely passed since “The One Where Pinkie Pie Knows.” Not the whole gestation period, not unless Cadence knew at the moment of conception. But a significant chunk did go by. It raises the question of what Starlight’s been doing over that time. It’s entirely possible that less time has passed for the ponies than for us.
Speaking of the previous finale, Starlight didn’t seem to have any trouble finding the throne room during then. Did she wander for hours before she performed her Slouch of Villainy?
Yeah, dwelling on the past is definitely not something Twilight does much. Just ask Moondancer, or look at how Twilight failed to recognize Celestia’s method for teaching her about friendship until the end of the premiere. At least she realized it eventually. Given how she understood the need for students to discover things for themselves during “Twilight Time,” this appears to be another case where her title went to her head.
I honestly love how Starlight is awkwardly wedged into the theme song, both in terms of just kind of being there and her expression. It’s hilarious, and I actually feel a little bad for laughing at it as much as I do.
I kind of astonished by Discovery Family. Who runs ads for a premiere as the premiere is airing? Especially ones that spoil the twists?
I do love the Grecian style on the urn. Also, “crystalling”? I suppose they can’t all be horse puns.
Looks like Spike been posing in the mirror for all six seasons.
That anxiety about meeting Sunburst. Starlight really is a Twilight clone.
I love the message flake. It’s a really cool means of communication. It seems like it could have a number of logistical problems, but it’s cool.
I also like Spike in these episodes. He’s doing what he does best, support anxious unicorns. Yes, there are a few head-slapping moments, but overall, I’d say he did good.
Heh. Never have we seen a better demonstration of how Shining Armor really is Twilight’s brother as seeing him sleep-deprived at the station. Adorkability clearly runs in the family. Still, kind of absurd that a baby would run royalty ragged. It’s not like they’re wanting for help. I can understand wanting to be responsible for their own kid, but they do have responsibilities beyond Flurry Heart. Their city-state needs them well-rested.
So, has Starlight been studying with Pinkie or something? Where’d she get the stool, popcorn, and lounge chair for Spike’s story time?
And the explanation for Flurry Heart’s alicorn status… is a big fat shrug from all parts. Wow, guys. Wow. Heck, weren’t Celestia and Luna supposed to be born alicorns according to the Journal of the Two Sisters? Should I interpret this as saying that they too ascended, or did they simply manifest from the æther?
Also, no mention whatsoever of earth pony magic. Or that alicorn horns might be earned as well. Seriously, I am disappoint.
Sunburst’s house has a wizard hat. In hindsight, that does seem like massive overcompensation.
Good God, but Starlight and Sunburst are shippable. Seriously, they’re adorable together, and the synergy of knowledge and ability is incredible. (You could also make an argument for Sunburst and Moondancer, but they’d probably starve to death surrounded by books if left to their own devices.)
Also, all of those friendship compulsions raise the uncomfortable specter of reforming spells.
Shining. Shining. Choosing which crystal is a simple matter. Roll a d10.
The doomsayers were right. Flurry Heart really did ruin everything. 
I’m impressed. They found an even more inappropriate end theme than normal for the first part.
The Frozen North is confirmed to be another wild region. Also, I suppose moving the sun closer wasn’t a tenable option. Still, I have to wonder if a barrier spell of some kind might have helped. A “heat shield,” if you will. Or something a bit more creative than “fire lasers until lasers stop working.” You have pegasus magic, ladies. Use it!
I wonder if they could use the spell to fix the book it came from…
Sunburst is yet another Twilight, one who put all his points during character building into book-horsery. It makes sense; he even got his cutie mark—a talent for illuminating others—by manipulating books. He’s like a more scholarly Rincewind, down to the attempt at a wizard beard. I like it.
I do like how the writers gave a sense of proportion with the encroaching chill by contrasting Dash’s attempts to deal with it with the diarchs’. Imagine how quickly it would’ve swept in without Celestia and Luna holding it back for as long as they did. Probably could’ve waylaid it even better if they pointed Flurry Heart at the storm system.
I have to wonder about Celestia calling Sunburst her student. He went to CSGU, yes, but was he a personal student? Does she actually teach classes at the school? She clearly recognized him, but from what circumstances?
I’m a bit disappointed that the diarchs don’t get new styles when crystallized, but I do like how it interacts with their manes.
Holy crap, Twilight’s parents finally got to speak! A shame the credits bunted it by calling them Mr. and Mrs. Sparkle. (Though this technically means that calling her mother Star Sparkle has been un-Jossed.)
In all, not bad, but not especially impressive. There’s some nice character building for Starlight and decent dramatic tension, but the lack of either a major villain or setting a tone for the season makes it feel rather weak, and shrugging away Flurry Heart’s subspecies does not impress. This doesn’t have the impact I’ve come to expect from a premiere, and that’s a real shame.
However, it’s not enough just to say something wasn’t very good (and to be fair, I found it a decent episode, just an underwhelming premiere.) There’s also the question of how it could be improved, and in this case, I think cutting the diarchs would’ve done a lot, since they didn’t do a lot in this story. Have them busy with affairs of state and unable to attend the ceremony. Have Rainbow Dash assemble the pegasus component of the Imperial Guard to hold back the storm for as long as possible (even, blasphemous as it may sound, Flash Sentry.) Have Twilight trust Sunburst based on Starlight’s (and Spike’s) word, and have the two ‘lights hold the Heart together as he performs the crystalling. (Heck, maybe get Rarity in on holding the giant crystal together.) That way, the question of Flurry Heart’s nature is left tantalizing rather than dismissed, an encroaching weather system isn’t treated as a four-alicorn problem, and some of the other characters get more to do than yelling at ponies.
Still, an eminently watchable episode. Hopefully, they’ll address the newest alicorn’s reason for existing in the finale. If all else fails, we can figure out an explanation for her.
That’s more than enough ruminating. Time for cards:
Fledgling’s Forbearance W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature’s activated abilities can’t be activated.
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield, you may attach Fledgling’s Forbearance to that creature.
A must for any prudent parent.
Chain of Mirrors 2W
Instant
All damage that would be dealt to target creature this turn is dealt to another target creature instead. Then the second creature’s controller may sacrifice a noncreature permanent. If he or she does, he or she may copy this spell and may choose new targets for the copy.
Intercept U
Instant
Counter target spell with a single target.
The baby loved the new game of Zappy-Catch. Twilight just tried to keep the castle intact.
Compulsive Sorter 1U
Creature — Unicorn Advisor
When Compulsive Sorter enters the battlefield, look at the top card of target opponent’s library. You may put that card on the bottom of that library.
Delirium — At the beginning of each opponent’s upkeep, if there are four or more card types among cards in your graveyard, look at the top card of that player’s library. You may put that card on the bottom of that library.
1/1
Frozen Stiff 2U
Snow Instant
Kicker 2S (You may pay an additional 2S as you cast this spell. S can be paid from one mana from a snow source.)
Tap all nonsnow creatures. If Frozen Stiff was kicked, those creatures don’t untap during their controllers’ next untap steps.
Mustache Tender 2U
Creature — Pony Citizen
Whenever Mustache Tender becomes the target of a spell or ability for the first time in a turn, it gets -2/-2 until end of turn.
”Brother, do I know how you feel.”
—Steven Magnet, fabulous serpent
3/3
Anxious Pupil 3U
Creature — Unicorn Wizard
1U, T: Draw two cards, then discard two cards.
The opportunities before her are matched only by her fear of losing them.
2/2
Sleep Deprivation 3U
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
At the beginning of the upkeep of enchanted creature’s controller, tap that creature. That player puts the top two cards of his or her library into his or her graveyard.
”Avoiding the darkness can lead to madness as surely as embracing it overmuch.”
—Princess Luna
Reliconstitution 4U
Sorcery
Return target artifact card from your graveyard to the battlefield.
Overload 6UU (You may cast this spell for its overload cost. If you do, change its text by replacing all instances of “target” with “each.”)
Complete Syllabus 4UUU
Sorcery
Look at your library, then put it back in any order.
”If you haven’t planned out everything, then you haven’t really planned.”
—Princess Twilight Sparkle
Traumatic Drone 1BB
Sorcery
Target player discards two cards and loses 2 life.
Starlight couldn’t hear Twilight’s plans over the sound of her own terror.
Young Tutor 2B
Sorcery
Search your library for a card, then shuffle your library and put that card on top of it.
Flashback 3BB (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)
Guttering Hearths 3BB
Snow Enchantment
At the beginning of each player’s upkeep, that player sacrifices a nonsnow creature.
When there are no creatures on the battlefield, sacrifice Guttering Hearths.
The Frozen North quickly reclaimed its rightful territory.
Spike’s Admirers 3R
Creature — Pony Citizen
As long as you control a Dragon, Spike’s Admirers gets +2/+1 and has menace.
They crowd in from all parts of the Empire when they hear their hero has arrived.
3/3
Devastating Wail 1G
Sorcery
Each opponent sacrifices an artifact or enchantment with the greatest converted mana cost among artifacts and enchantments he or she controls.
Do not trifle with an alicorn’s temper tantrums.
Infuse the Heart 1GG
Sorcery
Put X +1/+1 counters on each creature you control, where X is the number of creatures that entered the battlefield under your control this turn.
Every crystalling empowers the Crystal Heart, which empowers the crystal ponies, the feedback loop that fuels the Empire’s prosperity.
Recount Exploits 3G
Sorcery
Return target card from your graveyard to your hand.
Investigate. (Put a colorless Clue artifact token onto the battlefield with “2, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.”)
Past experience can lead to future solutions.
Message Flake 1
Snow Artifact
1, T, Sacrifice Message Flake: Scry 1, then draw a card.
Missives from the Crystal Empire dance on northern winds, seeking the light of the recipient’s heart.
Applewood Bassinet 2
Artifact
Whenever a creature enters the battlefield under your control, you may pay 2. If you do, put a +1/+1 counter on that creature.
”Any baby in one will grow up strong and true as the tree it was carved from.”
—Applejack, Bearer of Honesty
Mazelike Corridors 3
Artifact — Fortification
Fortified land has “2, T: Tap target creature.”
Fortify 2 (2: Attach to target land you control. Fortify only as a sorcery.)
Starlight suspected that the castle rearranged itself when she wasn’t looking.
Talentless Scholar GU
Creature — Unicorn Advisor
2, T: Investigate.
T, Sacrifice three Clues: Transform Talentless Scholar.
”Those who can’t, research.”
1/2
Sunburst, Imperial Crystaller
(GU) Legendary Creature — Unicorn Wizard
At the beginning of your draw step, draw an additional card.
3GU: Creatures you control get +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number of cards in your hand.
”There’s more to magic than casting spells.”
2/4
Conjure Props RW
Instant
You may put an Equipment card from your hand onto the battlefield attached to a creature you control. If you do, return that Equipment to your hand at the beginning of the next end step.
”Starlight is one of my most promising students. It helps that she was already kind of crazy.”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Princess Flurry Heart 1UR
Legendary Creature — Child
Alicorn (This card is a Pony Pegasus Unicorn.)
When Princess Flurry Heart enters the battlefield, you may pay X. If you do, Flurry deals X damage to target creature or player.
Flying, haste
UR: Return Flurry to its owner’s hand.
2/1
Tome Blast 2UR
Sorcery
Target player puts the top five cards of his or her library into his or her graveyard. Tome Blast deals 2 damage to that player for each land card put into his or her graveyard this way.
”Well, so much for that idea.”
—Princess Twilight Sparkle
Boreal Retreat
Snow Land
Boreal Retreat enters the battlefield tapped.
T: Add G or U to your mana pool.
”A thousand tomes, a thousand more,
For years these shelves one could explore.
A giant hat above the door.”
—The Dynasty of Winter Princesses
That's why you never put faith in secondary canon. It becomes heresy soon enough. *wanders away muttering about the emprah*
You'll notice that she didn't turn all nicey-nice after the Nanoha defeat means friendship thing. Starlight is still snarky, still haughty and still hates to take orders. Heh. Instead of being Pony Kim Il Sung, she's Major Winchester from MASH.
The premier felt a bit like it's running out of steam, but that might just be paranoia.
o-oh...
You forget...They said
"In Equestria"
As in, you can easily say in that land. Equestria is younger than the sisters, so you can say that they were born before that in whatever land they were chosen.
You know, you're cards make me wonder: does Wizards of the Coast even still make snow stuff?
nito
3830152
But the Codex Alicornes was scribed by Primarch Rogers, who consulted the Empress herself! This Inquisitor Haber surely must be a heretic himself!
Clearly, the only solution is Exterminatus.
3830154
Oh yes. Starlight still has a long way to go on the long path to redemption. She's just a lot more afraid and guilty than, say, Discord.
3830162
I'm withholding further judgement until I see more of the season.
3830223
Valid point... though the show does tend to conflate world and nation at times, like how Twilight called Griffonstone "the coolest kingdom in all of Equestria."
3830455
Nope. Coldsnap was the only time they worked with the supertype aside from the "snow land matters" effects in Ice Age and Alliances. But, as my use of numerous keywords in this blog alone shows, I don't let that stop me.
Ok, question. You ask a little child how they were born. What do they tell you?
"I don't know" right?
So you tell them, if they're yours. Or something similar.
Now, memories decay. Celestia and Luna are old. You as an adult, don't remember every detail of when you were a child...but you remember that you were a child at some point...when you're around 22, let's say. As you get older, you forget more and more of your earliest childhood. Now, Celestia and Luna are thousands of years old. They probably don't even remember.
Finally, address the episode. "1st Natural Born Alicorn in Equestrian History". It's entirely possible, (considering that C and L are pre-Equestrian), that they've never dealt with another natural-born alicorn. And it's like they confirmed or denied that they hypothetically 'aren't' natural born alicorns. Hell, they didn't even address it. But if you want something that leans towards them not being natural-born alicorns... just look at Twilight Sparkle's Ascension with the Room of Memories. Listen to the dialogue there.
Complete Syllabus sounds like a great way to get all your opponents to scoop in EDH... because nobody will have the patience to wait for you to sort your entire library.
Very powerful card, though, if you get the chance to play it. Should be a game-winner just about every time.
That catch on the rainboom bond was clever.
I loved New Starlight, even if her Start of Darkness was a bit disappointing. Spike finally has someone who can match him in a battle of snark!
Also, I like your idea for how the episode could have been greatly improved by the absence of two princesses, even if I wish Celestia and Luna could get more quality screentime.
3830478
I know, but a loophole in the writing is still a loophole!
Also, it fits my idea that her talent in magic is a) going outside the usual system, hence her cutie mark removal spell, which Twilight Sparkle didn't think was even remotely possible, and b) tinkering with existing magics, sometimes in ways even their creators didn't expect.
(I doubt she's got the raw power to match either unicorn Twilight or Sunset, nor the level of theoretical education of either; she's just very good at thinking inside and outside the chimney.
)
3830531
Another valid point. The diarchs wouldn't have the opportunity to learn much about alicorn reproduction while they were infants.
As for Celestia saying that Twilight "did something today that's never been done before," well, Cadence's ascension puts the lie to that. At least, until that gets retconned. Tia probably simplified the matter or meant that Twilight to get that spell to do what it was originally meant to; the verge of apotheosis is not the time to split hairs.
3830568
Yeah, it's a real mixed blessing. On the one hand, the sisters were actually effectual in a crisis. On the other, they didn't really add much to the story.
3830612
I really do need to hunker down and write that story that involves Our Town and an Eldrazi...
3830673
In Our Town
In Our Town
We don't have to wait
To find out our purpose is
To annihilate.
Gotta say, not exactly what I was expecting to wake up to (and yes I realize it is 12 for me, but still, I woke up to this). Those cards are pretty good though.
Infuse the Heart
I mean, this one for instance. Back during the Theros block this would've been insane, what with all the flash creatures and such. At the end of an opponent's turn, flash Boon Satyr, and then other things with Prophet of Kruphix, such as Courser of Kruphix. All of your creatures could get three counters at the end of their turn! Pretty good, sir, pretty good.
3830673 Yuh m8.
Everypony has done that at some point or another.
3830840
You think that's good, try it with tokens.
I'm glad you enjoyed these! If you didn't know, there are plenty more where they came from, which you can see from the index page linked here.
3830963
Hmm. While that's not entirely true, you do make a good point. This could be a variant of Rarity's chaise lounge summoning spell.
I, more than anyone else, am not allowed to resolve Complete Syllabus. I wouldn't finish until the heat death of the universe, and that's if we're lucky.
3830478
Wait a minute, though. Journal of the Two Sisters actually established that Equestria is a kingdom of kingdoms. The Crystal Empire, the Tribes, they were all a part of Equestria. So that's not conflating the world and nation at all. More likely, Griffonstone literally is just one of several kingdoms which is under Equestria's dominion, like a protectorate.
Good lord "Reliconstitution" (when Overloaded) and "Complete Syllabus" are nuts. Even with their high cost, they could completely turn the tide of any game.
I was rather shocked by the parents talking, myself, but you're right that it's kinda annoying how contradictory things are (though I highly doubt that the merchandise-Journal has any real impact on canon). If I recall properly, Cadence was originally a pegasus who ascended to alicorn-hood, but that point's novel-only.
You missed a prime chance to put fateseal 1 on Compulsive Sorter, I am disappointed.
Both in you, because of your normal use of old slash under utilized keywords and in Wizards for not giving us a block with this keyword yet.
Complete Syllabus has all of my yes. It's the logical extreme of Blue deck stacking.
Price looks about right, but ever so many ways of cheating on it.
Since both sides of a double faced card have their own full text boxes worth of space you have enough room for the reminder text for the Investigate keyword on Talentless Scholar.
I'm suprised there's not some sort of "Clever Dragon" card based around not being misdirected. Maybe a RW card with vigilance and "When this card is tapped for the first time each turn by a spell or ability controlled by another player; untap Clever Dragon."
Welp, here's to another season of fan cards and episode review. I'm looking forward to it.
3831976
Equestria being more of a loose confederation of city-states would certainly explains the summit in "Princess Spike."
Well, this is what I get for working from secondhand accounts.
3832766
Compulsive Sorter: As with other times when I eschewed fateseal, the problem is that the keyword can't easily specify a single player. I had to phrase it this way to stay consistent with the Shadows over Innistrad cycle from which I drew inspiration (Topplegeist et al.), which makes a point of affecting each opponent on his or her upkeep. I phrased the etb trigger that way for the sake of parallelism.
Talentless Scholar: That's just my usual policy of one use of reminder text per keyword per blog.
As for Spike, I think I was just too happy to see him be useful and competent to think to make a card out of him, though a dragon with protection from Unicorns is more than a little amusing.
3832806
It would, at that.
Well she was using time travel. Although that just raises the question of why she wouldn't already feel at home in the castle after all the time she's spent spying on Twilight.
That bothered me most about the episode. It almost bothers me enough to write a Fix Fic set in my "OP Earth Ponies" headcanon, except that I'm not sure I could meet the 1000 word requirement...although I've surprised myself before.
Am I the only one who noticed that Dash saying "It's freezing" shatters the fanon that pegasi can't feel cold? Although, it could be that they just have a higher tolerance for cold, but even they have their limits.
3833199
Or why she hasn't at least gotten some sense of the place after living there for months. Unless the tail end of Season 5 was really spaced out.
Your headcanon would give the facehugger moments between Flurry Heart and Pinkie a terrifying new angle. Don't play tug-of-war with the nice pony's life force, Flurry.
As for Dash's complaint, I had in fact noticed. I just wasn't saying anything in the hope that no one else had. Of course, this being Dash, she could've been playing it up in her efforts to get ponies to the train station.[/desperatejustification]
3833287 Oh jeez, as if it wasn't horrifying enough that her razor sharp hooves were digging into Pinkie's eyeball (assuming foal hooves are anything like human infant fingernails).
And I notice almost everything, unfortunately.
Now the season is over, I can go back to these old blogs. First things first, awesome cards, but I feel I need ask: Why the functional reprint of Arctic Flats? I mean, I get the snow land; we're in the Crystal Empire, but why chose a pair of ally colors for a snow land when they've all been done before?
Keep up the good work, and expect me to go over others in chronological order in the upcoming days (once I finish rendering these ones, of course).
4274565
Last I checked, green and blue weren't allies.
4274680 Whoops, never mind.
Huh....so she does. That's fascinating