FIMFiction Review #4 · 2:36pm Mar 8th, 2016
Hello there my fellow ponies! Hope you are all having a good day! With school going on as usual, College interrupts a few things so I am sorry if things seem slow on my userpage. 
I can imagine a lot of you are excited for stories to come out. Honestly I can say that I've been saying stuff and have no bite at the moment... almost like SEGA or EA. Yet I have gotten a message from my cover artist and the cover should be done soon. Which means this certain story may be able to come out near the middle of March, maybe even late March. Again I will not make promises. However, this is not what you came here for. 
I know what you came here for. It's time for another review! And boy oh boy was this story a good relief. Without further adieu, let us begin!
Description
Fluttershy has always been the one out of her friends to have fear constantly claw at her mind and drag her down into its deep abyss. From stage fright to nightmares, Fluttershy cannot escape it. She can only have the compassion of her friends to reassure her and slowly fight fear off.
But one morning, after having a pleasant sleep, she awakens in the majestic castle of Canterlot. At least the ruins of it. She wanders around and tries to find out what happened…
...while being hunted down by fear's true living manifestation.
Concept
The idea that Shadowfall went with was good. He was able to take the idea behind Xenomorphs being psychologically terrifying and stick it with Fluttershy; a mare who is easily scared. Shadowfall was able to display that this was all in dream form, and was shown at the beginning that it was going to be a dream. It was executed well and interesting to follow. The story tags, Adventure, Crossover, Dark, and Gore all fit very nicely into the story.
Plot
Isolation’s plot was easy to follow along. It was a one-shot story about how Fluttershy, the mare we know and love, who is terrified and fearful of many different creatures, specific situations, and other things. We see she is trying to get stronger, and desire to overcome her fear of the dark, and not have to rely on her night light anymore. Silly as that sounds, I am certain that some people slept with a night light as a child for quite some time. (I believe I was at least nine or ten when I stopped using one).
She is thrown into a dream, which she discovers is set in Canterlot, only in a ruinous state for an unexplained reason. As she goes along, terrified all the while, she falls through the flooring and breaks a wing, snapping it back into place and screaming all the while. Meanwhile, hints of the Xenomorph are slowly being thrown around, sudden movements and whatnot.
The creature finally makes itself known by thrusting its spear-like tail through a wall and chases her down until she finds a nest filled with ponies who are either facehugged or shall soon give birth to more Xenomorphs in that awful chestbursting way. Next thing we know, her friend is back and is ready to give her a hug, albeit a rather painful one by scratching her muzzle, biting a part of her ear off before Fluttershy gets the strength to throw the Alien off her. I can understand that adrenaline will make you stronger than before… but in this case, I’d say that maybe it was a little bit unbelievable? Maybe… I mean she did throw down a bear with ease during season two, so maybe she’s just hiding her true strength. 
But yes, she throws it off her and kills it due to the height from the fall. She feels like she is victorious, but unfortunately gets mobbed by a bunch more and is forced to wear a facehugger. She awakes from the nightmare and is visited by Angel Bunny. He gives her another glass of warm milk, and goes to turn her night light on again. Yet she tells him not too. In the end, Fluttershy conquers her fear of the darkness in her own unique way, even if it is a small step forward.
Setting
The setting at first is in Fluttershy’s home, and even though it is a frequent place to set up a scene. It is at least nice to see once and awhile. The ruined state of Canterlot is also another sight that, although not as frequent as Fluttershy’s cottage, is another good sight to see. (Don’t worry. I’ve used a decrepit Canterlot before in my crossover series, so it does have its uses).
Characters
Now we get onto the one and only main character of the story, Fluttershy. Shadowfall did a pretty good job with her. She was believable, she was in character as the shy and frightened mare we all have seen before. Angel was prominent in this story due to him being that character who gives her a push every now and then, and his characterization of these two was superb as well. The only two characters (along with the Xenomorph) were necessary to this story and its workings. I mean come on, it’s the killing machine in this story trying to eat Fluttershy’s throat out. You have to give it props for trying. (And funnily enough, dying to the second weakest of the mane six as well)!
Final Review & Score
Here we are at the end of the review. It is short but this is what happens when you review a one-shot story. They usually don’t last very long. But still, Shadowfall did a great job capturing how fear can terrify the mind, what your dreams can hide when you least expect it. Fluttershy’s illusions and nightmares tested how brave she could be, even if she was up against an unstoppable killing machine with no weapons to defend herself.
However… there were a few words that seemed out of place and other sentences that were awkward, with some sentences that needed a space forward to separate the end of each sentence. And boy, was the story filled with these mistakes.
But you know what? For a one-shot such as this, the pacing was actually pretty good. The story flowed well, and honestly, it actually did a better job then even SpitFlame’s The Elements of Honor with pacing. Don’t get me wrong, SpitFlame’s story still blows Shadowfall out of the water due to its length and complexity, but man oh man was the pacing good.
I’d give Isolated a 7.1/10. It’s funny because I felt that this story stood up to a seventeen-chaptered story. Sure, for different reasons; both are amazing, and I definitely liked this story for its pacing. But for The Elements of Honor, it’s how big it is, and how much I loved the drama. So all in all, Isolation did a great job. It was just the misplaced words, spelling errors, and the weird sentence structures that didn’t give it a high enough score. Yet Shadowfall still did a great job, and I commend him for making the Xenomorph a terrifying creature once more.
wykop.pl/cdn/c3201142/comment_0oKWn82L9RgKX8DtT6nzmQnO21DSU3mi.jpg
When the biggest fault of your story is the spelling mistakes.Time to go throw myself out the window.
I DID IT AGAIN.
3797520 Oh you're perfectly alright. Sure the biggest mistake was your spelling errors, but this will at least help make sure you check your stories once or twice.