Season 5 Finale · 9:39am Jan 23rd, 2016
Well I finally got around to watching the season 5 finale. I have to say, I was astonished when Twilight Sparkle was no longer a princess. I never thought they would go there, but they did! It wasn’t just that she wasn’t a princess, but that she awoke in an alternate universe! A strange reality, where nopony remembered that she was a princess, and she had never made her friends at all. It’s clichéd, yeah, but it’s way darker than I would have expected! Yes, yes I know the season 4 finale was dark as heck. But still, that they would go there takes real guts, with such a huge fan controversy over Twilight’s wings that just won’t die (while everyone seems to forget about how the show jumped the shark in A Canterlot Wedding). It takes show creators who really understand show business, that if you embrace controversy rather than cop out of it you’ll come out more popular every time. I don’t think Twilight’s ever been as popular than when she got unicornified again!
Of course it was temporary, and she had to get her friends back (because friendship transcends universes!) and restore her wings. But it was still a nice shout-out in a way, to those of us who didn’t appreciate Princess Twilight. Yes, I was one of those who didn’t want Twilight to have wings. Honestly it’s not that big of a deal. I just would have preferred Twilight to go a different route, and think her princess role really clashes with her character. I wouldn’t say it’s the end of the world though. (ACW was the end of the world.) It’s just nice to see some (wait for it) alternate interpretations of how things legitimately could have gone.
And then she went on a trip through alternate realities! I was too stoked to be mad at it, but now I’m both mad and stoked! Why are they pushing that stupid Equestria Girls franchise so much? Why is it so popular?? Well, I know why it’s popular, because furries don’t have enough guts to picture life as a horse, so their limited imaginations have an easier time with cookie cutter humans that just have horse parts stuck on them But I don’t have to like it! Do you know how hard it is to find fantasy animals that are fantasy animals? I am so sick of humans in cat suits!
But, at the same time I’m really stoked. Worried really. Well, not worried because it was a one-time thing, but authors don’t realize just how dangerous it is to introduce alternate realities into their story. You have to set strict limitations (as the show creators did, pretty much ending it by destroying the mirror in the end) or you will lose that suspension of disbelief. It’s the Discord problem. (Which again, the show creators addressed in this finale!) Once you introduce a swiss army knife solution to everything, you will forever lose credibility and confidence, from your readers and from within yourself, every time you don’t use that solution to solve the problem at hand. But stories aren’t stories without some sort of conflict or conundrum. So once you reform Discord, you have to say “Oh, he’s just randomly not solving it right away, because he’s random!” Which makes sense for his character, but it’s a really tenuous excuse. Similarly with alternate realities you always have to tell yourself, “Oh, they’re just not using the portal to find a solution because it’s on the... on the fritz, yeah.” When alternate worlds can be reached at the flicker of a horn at a mirror, then people just realize that somewhere in those worlds is a solution, to whatever problem the characters face from then on.
I was surprised they got rid of Discord, but honestly, I mean this might be a stretch but, I don’t think John DeLancie likes the show very much. From what I’ve seen of him speaking, he doesn’t watch it, doesn’t pay particular attention to its content, knows the voice actors but not the characters. He loves the phenomenon and the fandom, and he loves the attention he gets, but... I think he’d be happier if people didn’t keep dragging him back to making more episodes about making fun of the ponies. So yeah, retire Discord, I have no problem with that. It’d be like expecting Cheese Sandwich to move to Ponyville. Sure that’d be a nice if strange surprise, but I wouldn’t want it to happen unless Al himself was totally gunning for it.
So, good finale. Great finale. Even if EQG steals more screen time. Sorry, I’m getting stuck on EQG. My point is: despite that, it was a nice finale. I really look forward to season 6, but I’m very relieved that I’m finally through season 5 and can finally sit back and take it all in. And maybe do something other than ponies, like try to turn my miserable real life around and stop sucking so much.
And now I’m actually going to go watch it. I hope I didn’t just horribly disappoint myself.
I can’t believe the season finale was starring the Cutie Mark Crusaders! This is incredible!
Okay, no, no, really going to watch it now.
Did... everypony just break the fourth wall?
Huh.
Wow, I actually managed to shed a tear when Starlight returned to the village. It’s not joy though... bittersweet at best. I don’t have friends like that, and... I don’t know anyone who has friends like that. I wish Equestria was the real world. Not because we’d all be ponies or something, as fun as that would be, but because it would be awesome if friendship had a power like that. Not to banish evil monsters or whatever, but to bring people together. To be able to build a life with people, who will embrace you with open arms when you return to them, that would be... something special. Not like hugging but like, really being there for you. People you can help, and trust, and not feel so lost, and empty, and helpless. It’s a nice fantasy, at least...
Rainbow Dash. Rainbow Dash with an artificial wing. That just cuts deep. I wonder if Scootaloo is her mechanic. 
Or maybe...
A time chase plot was alright, I suppose. I haven’t seen one like that since Back to the Future 2, where Biff went and fucked up the past. Usually those changing the past stories just harp on you the whole time for how evil it is to try and change fate and how your well intentioned changes always result in absolutely horrible outcomes. But a time chase adds another dimension to it, when you have someone actually trying to cause horrible outcomes and you’ve gotta stop them somehow, without causing bad things to happen, yourself. It’s less guilt trippy, less preachy. Starlight had to actually try to fuck things up, even if the result was always horrible as per the cliché.
They still missed a hell of an opportunity to have Twilight wake up completely confused as a friendless unicorn in Canterlot, and have to fix things from there. Twilight never had to worry about her own body getting violated by time travel. It’s a delightfully personal touch that really would have added suspense to the show, if it was Quantum Leap style shenanigans. It’d make the relative power levels of Twi and Starlight make more sense, too.
Honestly, just once, I’d like to see a movie where the main character ends up changing the past, and the future that results is, in fact, better than the one they started with. Even if...
I know Twilight was under a lot of stress okay, but she was really a dick to Nightmare Moon. I mean, even Nightmare Moon wasn’t as dickish as Twilight. Snootie captured Twilight, led her to the table, said gimme the shinies, and that’s about it. And Twilight stood up to her and said, “I’m sorry my friends and I couldn’t come together and defeat you, because in my world you’re a lot happier pony. Everypony loves you, and your sister loves you, and you and your sister rule Equestria together. Please, let me return the world to the way it should be. I promise you it’ll work out better for all of us.”
And then NMM a bitch and Twi say ok then fu and time portals away.
But no, instead Twilight is all, “Aha, I was going to betray you all along, because you’re evil! I’m glad we smacked you down and totally owned you. I’m going to make it happen again, and there’s nothing you can do about it, hope u like banans biiiiiiiiiiiich!”
And, that last world.... Is that what happens when friendship isn’t enough? No evil villains, no heroes, no ponies, no trees, no animals, just a windswept wasteland of dead rock and sand? I like how Twilight speculated that it wasn’t her friendship necessarily, but reducing the power of friendship overall that caused it, but... that’s what happens when friendship isn’t enough?
I guess considering that really is the fate of our planet, some billions of years down the line, it makes a cruel sort of sense. I wish friendship was magic...
Sorry. I'm afraid that I'm not sure what to say beyond that, particularly given that I don't think I have much in the way of answers to those feelings either.
I'm glad it sounds like you mostly enjoyed the finale, though. :)
Oh, and hm. I hadn't noticed it before, but in that screenshot you included, while everyone else (except maybe Vinyl, with her glasses) is looking at the camera, Bulk Biceps appears to be looking at Fluttershy...
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Maybe Bulk is camerashy.
If you want something to say, you could say what you agree or disagree with, or what I got spot on correct, or what I was basically wrong about in every way.
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"Maybe Bulk is camerashy."
Heh. :)
"If you want something to say, you could say what you agree or disagree with, or what I got spot on correct, or what I was basically wrong about in every way."
Oh. Well, a lot of it is probably subjective, though, and a lot of it would probably require extensive study... or did you mean about the finale? I was talking there about your expressions of... despair-tinged longing? Is that a good way to describe it? Hopefully it's clear enough for you to get what I mean.
Regarding the finale... hm.
Well, tying in with how harsh Twilight was with Nightmare Moon, she did also seem unimpressed by how not-dead everything was, and how Nightmare Moon's reign was apparently stable enough for tour groups to visit the castle (which has been rebuilt) on what sounds like a pretty regular basis. Whatever Nightmare Moon's faults as a ruler, she does seem to be a lot better than the Mad Goddess of Freezing Everything.
Twilight having to deal with parts of her own past being altered and Twilight visiting better timelines both sound like potentially interesting concepts.
...That seems to be all that's coming to me at the moment; sorry.
edit:
Oh, here's a thing, actually:
If we accept the hypothesis that what we observed was a linear progression in Twilight's personal time from "better" to "worse" timelines, then the changeling timeline is better than the Nightmare Moon one. Which raises the question of how exactly that is; certainly, from what we see on screen, the relationship between those two would appear to be reversed, so the factor correcting the relationship is likely to be significant, not readily apparent from the perspective we got, and therefore quite possibly interesting. One idea I actually tried to write a bit (which I might return to at some point) on is kind of based on what the changelings say. When the Rainbow Dash changeling says that the changelings attack Ponyville... was that a ploy that they actually thought might work? Certainly, one could argue that it was just theatrics and extended taunting by Chrysalis, but the idea that it wasn't has some interesting possibilities.
God, I want to hug you. ...is that okay? I mean, it's probably not okay to actually hug you, since I don't actually know you, but wanting should be fine, I think. I also want to do thag other thing with the love and support, but I'm not sure I'm good enough at that. :( I already could be and want to comment on your stuff way more, and I don't manage to do that. I feel like I manage to be at least partial emotional support for a handful of people, at least, but I'm also constantly terrified that I won't have it in me anymore, or won't notice when I stop, or something...
Enough about me, though: I don't think I've ever seen you go into detail on why A Canterlot Wedding was so bad. I mean, I can assume a lot of things, but I'm curious which ones exactly stick out to you. You have really unique thought processes and I enjoy seeing them. I didn't hate it, myself, but the theme of "Twilight gets to be giant judgemental bitch, but actually this is model behavior because she's doing it towards someone who is ~secretly evil~" was pretty offputting.
Please to be writing all fiction in place of everyone else.
I enjoyed the finale enough, even if I thought the pacing wasn't great. Also, that Starlight's motivation was pretty underwhelming. Could they really not get any more life ruining than that? It wasn't even really the cutie mark that was to blame, it was Celestia's dumb (racist) education system! Starlight totally should have gone on a crusade against schools instead.
I was pleasantly surprised at how non-broken the mane 5 were in the alternate timelines. I was really expecting a "oh no, they all remained blank flanks forever because they didn't have the real cutie mark destiny magic of meeting their _true friends_, but nah, they all seemed like well-adjusted adults, for the worlds they lived in. It was just the rest of the universe that was arbitrarily broken. Still a bit disappointed they didn't get _different_ cutie marks for doing _different_ things, since that would let me accept the idea of them as an actual good neat thing, instead of creepy forced predestination, but, eh.
Also watching Glimglam just float herself around a bunch was really fun. I dunno, the animation and concept there amused me.
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But she cahahan't deciiiiide on her tahahahpestriiiies!!!
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It is totally okay to hug me. Sorry if I'm such a downer at times. Don't worry about breaking me if you mess up emotional support or something. I'm happy that you have it in your heart to do that for others!
I was surprised that they had their cutie marks at all! That was sort of the point. You'd think Twilight would have thought to mention that to Starlight... but that means
the animators were lazytheir destiny was so powerful, that even the loss of their defining moments didn't stop them from finding it. Interestingly,Applejack andRainbow Dash's flank was never shown in any of the futures.As for A Canterlot Wedding, I ranted about it on my "real" blog where I said how to fix it. tl;dr make Cadance a unicorn, make Shiney and Twilight estranged, don't avoid criticism of weddings, let the EoH save the day, after the power of love frees them, and don't defeat Princess Celestia. Also this would be a really good idea. The biggest problem with the episode was that by making Cadance an alicorn, it cheapened Twilight's ascension, making it an ordinary achievement, rather than something un-heard-of. Also that song at the end.
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"
"But she cahahan't deciiiiide on her tahahahpestriiiies!!!
Such evil! :D
And aye, A Canterlot Wedding could have been much better.
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holy shit a real blog
holy shit everything you say on it is amazing
holy shit. I don't know why, but I'm basically willing to completely and utterly believe anything you say. Can I apply for an apprenticeship or something? What am I supposed to actually keep in mind to make life better?
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Uh... make some... friends?
No seriously, like every needless wrong in the world goes straight to how we've been convinced to help people we hate, and abandon people we like. Friendship is like, super important. But other than that I dunno, stop eating sugar? Reduce, reuse, recycle? Install Gentoo?
Nobody ever said my blog was all that great before, honestly. You're probably just excited at finding it, and it won't be nearly as interesting tomorrow. I do my best to make it worth reading though, so thanks for the compliment!
As for apprenticeship, yeah I'm always looking for friends! The hardest thing on the Internet is keeping track of someone though, so I dunno, what if I forget about coming to fimfiction for another month? Though, using a public key to identify yourself would really help with that.
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ACW is so bad it keeps bringing me back just to hate it more!
But seriously, if that's the worst they can do, I'm not really complaining. It's the funnest episode to complain about though, second being Feeling Pinkie Keen.
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Already picked up on this one, and it help, yes. Thanks anyway.
Do you mean, like, unintentionally help people we hate, because I can agree with that; but if you're arguing against universal compassion, I'm going to have to drag that out. Not in the least because I'm pretty sure that's not a cultural zeitgeist at all, it's all about advancing ways to disguise demonizing acceptable targets.
I'd like to do the first but I'm not a well rounded adult and have no idea what else to eat. ...the same basically goes for the second. The third... would involve either sorting through my hard drive or getting a new machine, and while I should should probably do both of those I'm kind of procrastinating on them forever. The advice is noted and will taken, though!
Well, yes, probably, and also probably, but also no one has been me before. You're just very, uh, iconoclastic, and it's something I appreciate. You have things you actually think out, and aren't gut agreements or disagreements with a majority or minority opinion. (I'm not sure this actually a feat I can manage, by the way.) The perspective there is refreshing. Also somewhat crushing, at times, but. :/
the personthe machine you think they are? I'm having a bunch of trouble wrapping my head around the concepts in general. I'm sure you'll chastise me on it, and I'm really interested in hearing out your perspective, but... I don't actually care about security much? I don't see what personal benefit there is. I'm vulnerable in so, so many ways, technologically and not, that even if I could resolve some of them, anyone who seriously wanted to do me harm would be able to anyway. The best case scenario even if I did have perfect security would be what, drawn out shadow information warfare? Even that would qualify as life-ruining and isn't something I could deal with, so. There's an angle of defeatist here, I know, but it also saves me a lot of time and effort and stress, and provides a sort of peace of mind, even if it's different from a good one.3708916
Hm, yes, it could have been a lot worse, too, thinking about it. And being fun to complain about could be said to be its own sort of quality. :)
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No, I wouldn't argue something silly like that! I'm just arguing against gainful employment.
Wow, really? I've had a lot of luck there, actually! If you are in the USA, chances are you try to cut back on fat, eat food with lots of sucrose and/or fructose, don't have a lot of fiber in your diet, are severely dehydrated, and have a magnesium deficiency. So, the solution is to avoid low-fat stuff, eat more fiber, absolutely nothing with added fructose or sucrose, especially soda, drink lots of water, and dark green, leafy vegetables and cruciforms.
I'm partway convinced that the vast majority of depression is indigestion, with our irritated gut sucking up all the available serotonin.
I honestly don't recommend it. Find a friend you can trust to have those dangerous thoughts for you, and to support you when you have them yourself. Trying to do it all on your own is... not pleasant. Isn't a day gone by that I wish I could believe in some hocus pocus that makes other people satisfied, but doesn't work on me. It helps my writing to have to think this way, but... it's not very pleasant.
DON'T LOOK UP WE'RE FALLING FOREVERRR
There are lots of different ways to use a public key, and actually lots of kinds of public key since fancy math keeps finding new schemes for making them. Same basic concept though, that you create a private key you use to sign and decrypt, and a public key that others can use to verify and encrypt. Freenet is the most flexible, though it really tries to keep things careful and safe. Combined with FMS (http ://localhost:8888/freenet:USK@0npnMrqZNKRCRoGojZV93UNHCMN-6UU3rRSAmP6jNLE,~BG-edFtdCC1cSH4O3BWdeIYa8Sw5DfyrSV-TKdO5ec,AQACAAE/fms/143/download.htm) it can be pretty awesome. PGP is the most general (you can even paste it in web forms) but not very convenient. i2p and Tor are fun, though they're much more transient, only using public keys in transit. There's SSH for direct connections... don't really know any others that aren't weird and obscure. So, any of those should be step-by-step guides.
They can help filter the wheat from the chafe, pretty much. That allows us to manage a whole lot more chafe, which makes it easier to do things like "accept stuff from literally everyone." They also enable indirect relaying, like, if we're trying to communicate over a 3rd party website without being connected directly. They also enable multi-homing, since even if that 3rd party changes, the public key can remain the same. I'm pretty gung ho about them honestly. They aren't a magic bullet, but... they're pretty useful!
And boy are they counting on you to believe that. There's no secret cabal of all powerful Illuminati who only allow us to exist at their whim, thankfully. The ones who wish they were can be stopped pretty easily, with a little care and critical thinking. Heck, there was that big thing in France recently where the evil villains orchestrated their plot using code phrases over unencrypted, highly monitored cell phones. Security isn't a binary, and you can never be 100% safe without unplugging your network cable, but a little bit goes a long way. I see this public key stuff more as a way of keeping friends together, and helping you figure out who to trust, rather than trying to fight thugs who already have control over you. Pretty much any encryption can be broken using a rubber hose and your knees, but they don't have that kind of power over us yet, unless we stop protecting ourselves on the misleading lie that they do.