The Cutie Re-Mark · 6:59pm Nov 28th, 2015
Rant ahead. Lots of swearing. Don't read if you're a thin-skinned piece of unremittent garbage who has their little feelings hurt when people use bad words.
And suddenly Rise of Roam doesn't seem so bad, does it?
At least my version of Equestria isn't a blighted, industrial dystopia in a constant, unwinnable war with the Crystal Empire.
Or a broken ruin controlled by Queen Chrysalis harvesting ponies in the Canterlot dungeons.
Or an eternal night-smothered kingdom ruled by Nightmare Moon where Celestia is imprisoned in the moon, and night creatures stalk the streets.
Or a desolate, magma-streaked wasteland with a laser-happy centaur blasting everything for no reason.
Or a chaos-laden 3D madhouse where Celestia and Luna are clowns being chased... okay, that one was kinda cool...
But even the Flim and Flam ruled oligarchy was worse than what I designed.
I mean, yeah sure, mine is a bifurcated dual kingdom where sunlight can never reign over one half, and a a mysterious and malevolent force works from behind the scenes to bring down a superior military force to bring down an oppressive, anti-magic regime over all of Equestria.
No big deal really.
And for Celestia's sake, will somepony just punch Starlight Glimmer in the face. Multiple times. She's such a pretentious, condescending, rude, arrogant, monologuing, interrupting, callous, whiny, judgmental BITCH!
Oh blah blah, your friend a cutie mark before you, moved on with his life, and you got jealous and your feelings hurt. Get the fuck over it, you fucking hypocrite. I mean Jesus fucking christ.
"I'm going to ruin everyone's lives and the future of all pony kind cuz I got a bit butt-hurt about some guy getting a cutie mark before me when I was little."
Cry me a god damn river you whiny-ass piece of shit!
Best response to the finale ive seen today.
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In the words of the great philosopher, Bulk Biceps:
YEAAAAHHHH!!!
Yes.
Yes to all these things.
yeeeesssshhhhh.....
Starlight being surprisingly effective villain and canonically being stronger than alicorn Twilight is a really interesting twist. I wonder what will be done with that in approximately a year, when S6 will begin...
The thing is, even though we saw a bunch of ponies (some missing a limb or two) fighting, supposedly, to the death, they still were doing all those horrible things in a cute as fuck manner. Blame talented people from DHX that were capable of making that bloodbath adorable.
In case of RoR, your readers only have their minds and imagination, which tend to be triggered by some words. The imagination that runs wild, with the support of specific vocabulary selections, will do wonders to give the most gruesome impression even of the most timid event.
3574532 I know, right!
I know it's a kid's show, I know it had to end nicely. But couldn't Glimmer have been owned just ONCE. She needed a single, good owning. A comedic trip by Spike or something would have made me happy.
3575159 I know Twilight said that she couldn't stop Starlight, but watching what happened it seemed to me that Starlight was simply outsmarting Twilight. Her magic wasn't showcased to be more powerful blow-for-blow. Although she did seem to have more stamina.
And I suppose you have a point. My simply literary medium can't really compete much with the visual medium in conveying images.