Spoiler Alert: Age of Ultron, Part Seven · 12:34am Jul 23rd, 2015
: ...Dr. Yes, did you interrupt her review just to say that humanity is doomed?
And that it's worth helping! Don't quote me out of context, Twilight.
: Well, oh-kay, then. The Avengers head home to their new, less cool, military-compound base. Hawkeye heads into semi-retirement to raise his new kid, Nathan Pietro Maximoff, Thor heads off to investigate Ragnarok and the Infinity Gems, and Tony decides to spend less time with the team and more time with Pepper and his costume. The flick ends with Cap and Nat gettin' ready to train the New Avengers, Scarlet Witch, the Vision, War Machine, and the Falcon.
Oh, and Thanos gets a mid-credits scene. Just in case you forgot he was still in the MCU. Wouldn't blame ya; he hasn't moved off of his La-Z-Boy once in three years!
: So, what can we say about this film?
Look, if you came to this film to see some cool action and some Whedon wit, well, it's still here. And if you enjoyed it last time, you'll probably enjoy it here. But if you have any investment in the Avengers beyond that, this is a disappointment. Iron Man's at his absolute most insufferable, to the point where his actions don't even make sense. Bruce's and Natasha's relationship is insulting, self-destructive, and even a little creepy. Not to mention any of Hulk's character development as a hero from the last film has disappeared, leaving a weakling balanced with a monster. Just like every version of the Hulk that came before. The Vision has lost most of his complexity and somehow became even more confusing. Quicksilver's death is a pointless waste of a good character. And Ultron is utterly mishandled. Instead of being a terrifyingly intense maniac and one of the Avengers' strongest villains, he's become a cheap attempt to reproduce Loki's success. The god complex, man child personality disguised by a slick facade, robotic army, use of mind control to tear the team apart; it's all there! But without anywhere near the effectiveness! On top of all that, this is also the first film where I truly felt that the Marvel Cinematic Universe's continuity was beginning to restrict it. No other film up to this point has made me think that.
If you ignore the actual story and enjoy it as a popcorn movie, it can still be enjoyed. But any attempt to enjoy the plot, either as a single work or within the context of its larger universe, is utterly in vain, and it feels like a stab to the gut for us as Avengers fans.
: Shame, too. The actors, special effects animators, costume designers, and the like are all top notch in this film. It's the writers, directors, and the others at the top who caused all of this good work to crash and burn.
: Hey, how long do you think it'll take for Thanos to kill Vision to get his Infinity Gem?
: Alright, everyone, no goofing around. We still have to search the Omniverse for our copy of the Desolation of the Smaug! Only 7/8 of infinite earths to explore!
: Oh, fine!
Am I the only one who prefers the movie Ultron to the comic version?! Whatever. You can have your opinions no matter how wrong they are, but I'll still say to the bitter fucking end that this movie is perfect.
*sees someone write a seven page long review explaining why Age of Ultron is terrible*
*cries tears of joy*
3261298 Well, you're entitled to your opinion, as well. But I'd argue that NO film is perfect, and certainly not this one.
Also, I'm REALLY fond of comic Ultron. The psychotic robot nightmare of the comics is one of the most intimidating foes the Avengers have to face. And while I respect the film's right and responsibility to make him their own character, when his motivation barely makes sense, and he is clearly intended to reproduce Loki's popularity instead of be his own character, they failed to do so. Plus, I've seen the idea of robots who decide to wipe out humanity because it's the logical thing to do way too many times by now.
3261385 Just another day's work, random citizen!
Now what to do next? I'm debating between Behind the Mask and Batman Returns.
Rip in Pieces Vision. Anyone who has an infinity stone is a freaking bullseye and Thanos is one Planet sized Dart.
3261469 Batman Returns
3261503 Exactly. It really feels like a waste to kill him off in a fight that's doesn't really have anything to do with his personal character arc. Hopefully they'll rebuild him after Infinity War.
3261504 Yeah, I suppose I can get Twilight to review one more sequel out of order, eh?
3261576 just hope nothing that bad happens on Xandar also. Especially with that officer that John C. Reily plays.
3261855 Agreed. If Thanos can get the Reality Gem from the Collector, than he should be able to get the rest of the Gems without hurting anyone.
3261855 3263627 I wouldn't count on it... He's playing the Abin Sur to Richard Rider's Hal Jordan after all
3265551 Have we heard any news on the Richard Rider front, btb?
It's nice to see some one explain why Ultron didn't work, rather than yell about it.
I'm sure he will assemble the Infinity Gauntlet without hurting anyone else.
totally sure...
3268392 Thanks! That means a lot. I'd rather be the guy who rationally explains why something is wrong than the one who throws a fit. Though even I have my moments.
And I agree that Thanos won't hurt anyone to get the Gauntlet. Nope, none at all. And Batman's parents will survive Dawn of Justice. And the Doctor will travel with Clara forever.