Review: Shipping and Handling, by: Pegasus Rescue Brigade

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The lovable, if rather clumsily Ditzy Doo finally has one accident to many on the job and gets fired from her position in Cloudsdale’s premier delivery company. Desperate for work she applies for a job at this new ‘shipping’ company in Ponyville. Only after signing the contract does she realize it wasn’t the type of shipping she expected.

Yes this is a story about Derpy trying to play matchmaker.

Story: This story presents an excellent example of a dichotomy in how stories, especially nonprofessional ones like fanfics, can be looked at. Which gets more focus in reviewing and deciding how ‘good’ it is? The writing, or the narrative? What matters more, what happens in the story, or how well conveyed and written those events are? Both do matter, but often one will get more focus then the other. This story highlights this in that which one you focus on will determine if you love it, or see it as over-hyped, and while maybe not ‘bad’, definitely not good enough to be as big and loved as it is by some. The writing quality on it’s own.... isn’t all that great. Again, it’s not horrible, far from it, but at best just average, and does have a lot of issues. While the narrative, what the story is about, is amazingly touching, heartwarming, sweet, hilarious, and just a real joy to experience.

What issues does the writing have? Well first and foremost, my old foe pacing. It is a very fast paced story, almost to much in some parts, especially when it comes to Ditzy’s early shipping jobs. They felt very rushed. And often rather contrived at times. Luckily the pacing issue does get better, and doesn’t have that big an impact on the overall story, mostly just the individual shipping jobs. The plot-contrivances however, those stick around a lot. And yet the story kind of makes them work. The story very much knows a lot of this is quick, contrived, or out of nowhere, but has a very ‘just go with it’ attitude. It’s not trying to hide this fact, it almost embraces it, almost seeming to say “Yeah I know it’s contrived, I know it’s ‘poor writing’. But the result is funny/heartwarming enough to be worth it.” And it’s often right. The contrivances don’t go into the outright impossible, more the merely implausible, or possible, but could have been handled better direction.

Such as the one near the end that serves only to add drama and tension to the story. Just as Ditzy’s life is getting back on track, she gets hit with bad news from out of nowhere. News that, when you stop to think about it, really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. It is there simply to give Ditzy something to worry about, and up the stakes for the final shipping job. Yeah if you think too hard about it, it makes not a lot of sense. Yet the story does make it work. There is some sense to it. It’s not outright mindless action/comedy movie levels of “Just don’t think about it.” more, “Don’t overthink it, and just go with it.”.

So yes, your ability to enjoy this story will very much depend on how well you can ‘just go with it’ and enjoy what is going on, without getting too hung up on the issues with the writing itself. But it is worth it, because while the story might not be to super serious about how it goes about telling itself, it is very serious, and does a great job on what it is about. Love. Exploring it’s many facets, it’s importance. Showing a variety of different relationships and issues. Even familial love. Showing it as just as powerful and important as the romantic kind. So yes, while the writing quality might have issues and not be more then all right, with some flaws. The story does an amazing job at still telling a great narrative, and being extremely touching, heartwarming, and even tear jerking in a few places.

Characters: This is the stories largest strength, the endearing, lovable, and very well done characters. Especially Ditzy herself. While not quite up to “Best interpretation EVAR! One true Derpy!” levels, it is a really sweet take on the mare. And one of the best. Kind, caring, loving, simply wanting to help other ponies. Not quite as scatterbrained as other versions tend to be, but still a bit clumsy. Though much more downplayed after the first few chapters then usual for her. Just an all around very endearing and enjoyable take on the character.

The other characters were good as well. Her fellow shipping ponies were fun to watch, though admittedly Cloudcover and Breeze were kind of generic feeling. More so Cloudcover, I really can’t think of anything but the most generic terms to describe him. Breeze, slightly better, but only in his feelings and growing relationship with Ditzy. The rest though, were quite unique and easy to get a feel for. The one off ponies for her shipping assignments were well done, the canon characters felt true to themselves, and the more major background ones felt fine as well. Dinky felt... odd at first. Not at all like a foal. Though that does seem to be intentional as it’s made clear over the long run that she’s simply a lot more mature and intelligent then most foals her age. While still having a few little quirks that do make her feel not quite like a tiny adult.

The one major issue with the characters, one I didn’t notice.. well noticed but didn’t quite have a way to put in words... I’ve heard is the lack of character voices. Do have to agree with that. It’s another part in the “How versus what” issue from above. While what the characters are saying fits their character, does define them, and does feel like different characters talking, and in ways you can tell who would or wouldn’t say something. How they say it is pretty much the same. There is little other then content that makes it clear who is or isn’t saying something. Syntax, vocabulary, verbal ticks, with the possible exception of Watt, all the characters do tend to feel rather similar in that respect. Some variety, but not a lot. The worst offender for this and that plainly shows it is Twist. Not even a trace of her lisp is shown whenever she talks. While I’d argue that’s a good thing overall, cause I found her voice really annoying, it is something that stands out as not quite right.

Engagement: The story is light enough that it’s easy to pick up and put down. Helped by it being a very episodic story till the end. Each chapter it’s own little adventure in the exploits of Matchmaker DItzy, while having a growing amount of other story about her life outside of the job building throughout. You can easily just read a chapter here and there. While still being enjoyable to just keep on going. And the last few chapters do get much more gripping and make you want to just keep going as the final plot and conflict unfold.

Ponyness: This feels right at home in Equestria. More or less. The overall story, and the theme of exploring all the forms love can take is great, and works really well. Though there are a few minor issues that feel a tad out of place. First is how Equestria’s Speedy Shipping Services gets as many cases as it does. On the one hoof, it does work, cause the world is a lot larger then just the few ponies we see over and over. And likely far more ponies just in Ponyville then it appears, and we are only seeing a fraction of them, so yeah could be enough ponies in it and surrounding towns to give them the number of jobs they get. But that is kind of hampered by the fact every single job we see Ditzy get sent on involves either one of the mane cast, or some rather prominent secondary/background character. Making the limit feeling return and kind of undoing the first bit that does make sense. Just a minor quibble.

The other is the aforementioned twist near the end. That something like that could happen seems really really out of place and at odds with the overall feel of Equestria. The one mare would be expected to pay off that huge a fine, for a mistake, without ever actually having a chance to even defend herself? Yeah... does not sit well, at all.

But again mostly minor little bits, overall, this is a very good fit for the setting, and the couples we see explored do mostly work.

Overall: Great. Like I said, how you feel about the story will depend on where you fall on the writing versus narrative spectrum. It should be clear by now, I fall very much on the narrative side of that. Yes the story has issues, most of which I’ve already listed and explained, and yet those issues are rather minor compared to what the story does right. This is a story that, you really shouldn’t overthink, that isn’t meant as some deep, thought provoking narrative, meticulously planned out. No, the story isn’t going for that, rather the story is an emotional experience. And that it does remarkably well. It is great at evoking feelings. Even if the logic behind it does fall apart a bit under to much scrutiny. But nonetheless still manages to be a wholly enjoyable, sweet, touching tale that is more then worth the journey.

Now, how to close out a review of a story with incredible amounts of derp-dorableness? Well, have even more Derp-dorableness.