My (Attempted) First Story Here On FimFic

Last month I submitted a story to Fimfiction. It did not get approved. I was told it "read like an encyclopedia." Too bad. Don't care. That was the point. So since I can't officially submit it ever again, here it is as a blog post. Based on the SuperMechaDeathChrist video, here is:

The Chronicle of Super Mecha Death Sparkle

In the year 2000 P.C., Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 prototype appears from the future in the ancient preponypolithic era. Her destruction would come about through the joint efforts of the cave ponies, the norse gods, and Spinosaurus Aegyptiacus. Her initial appearance has been shrouded in complete mystery and her remains have been lost to the sands of time.

900 P.C. the remains of Super Mecha Death Sparke 2000 are found at the ruins of Everfree Castle. The next morning, Everfree castle is rebuilt as the industrial, cyberpunk utopia, Mecha Everfree castle. But as quickly as it appeared, the entire structure mysteriously vanishes at dusk.

565 A.C. the patron Saint Starswirl encountered the abomination Lord Tirek rising from the depths of Froggy Bottom Bog. He called upon the might of Zacherlyle the Allmother, but instead received the aid of Death Sparkle the first, who combated Tirek with a barrage of lightning strikes and atomic firebombs, driving the beast back to the reaches from whence he came.

476 P.C. King Sombra the CRYSTALLLSSSS...., was haunted by a vision of Death Sparkle. From this vision, or this delusion, he constructed Mecha Death Sparkle from the crude weapons, armor and technological advances of the Crystal Empire. She was sent to do battle against the Griffon Kingdom near the city of Buckarest. A vain product of unadulterated hate, she went on a killing spree, massacring the armies of both sides and ultimately beheaded King Sombra himself. For centuries, her whereabouts were lost to time…

Until 933 A.C., when the Solar Empire unearthed the remains of Mecha Death Sparkle.

942 A.C. As part of her attempts at total conquest for her sacred reich, Furer Celestia ordered the upgrade of Mecha Death Sparkle to Super Mecha Death Sparkle. *Note: Not to be confused with the diamond record selling metal musician and former president of the United States, Dave Mustaine and his descendant, Super Megadeth Sparkle.* Furer Celestia at the time was searching for Equestria’s lost doomsday weapon, the Elements of Harmony. Her goal in the end was to mount or even instal the Elements into Super Mecha Death Sparkle and combine her offensive capabilities with the powers of Goddess Faust to forge the most diabolical and insane weapon to ever be conceived by Equinekind.

944 A.C., upon activation, Super Mecha Death Sparkle refused the orders of her furer and turned her offensive capabilities on Celestia, burtally assassinating the ancient alicorn. She goes on another killing rampage, massacring entire armies from both Fascist Germaneigh and Coltmunist Staliongrad before being finally brought down by a coalition of allied forces lead by the New Lunar Republic.

945 A.C. Super Mecha Death Sparkle was reconstructed into Version 2 and upgraded in an undisclosed military base in Amarerica, the project secretly funded by the New Lunar Republic. She was installed with an electronic interface and given rudimentary wings for a flight system, as well as an artificial voice synthesizer. However, she could only gutturaly scream Germane obscenities.

“WARUM ZUM TEUFEL HAST DU DAS UEBERSETZEN!”
-Super Mecha Death Sparkle, 944 A.C.

947 A.C. the newly upgraded Super Mecha Death Sparkle Version 3 is given her first test flight over the Mojavneigh desert near Mosswell, Neigh Mexicolt. It was mistaken for a human.

955 A.C. Super Mecha Death Sparkle Version 4 is upgraded with the latest technology. She initially malfunctions after crashing into a hayburger joint, mistaking it for a Coltmunist bunker.

960 A.C. Super Mecha Death Sparkle is reconstructed into version 5 and equipped with exparamental state of the art weaponry that operated on laser physics. It failed horrifically as she and the hanger she was rebuilt in were both destroyed upon activation.

962 A.C. Super Mecha Death Sparkle is completely overhauled and rebuilt as Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000, or SMDS2K. She was fitted with the latest in stealth reconnaissance flight capabilities and was given a test flight. Unfortunately communications with SMDS2K went down during a sudden power outage and control was lost. Once communications were restored, SMDS2K was out of range, flying to parts unknown. She would not be rediscovered for another 40 years. The Super Mecha Death Sparkle program was discontinued. Funds were reallocated to a new stealth weapons project, which would later be known as the Shadow Bolts.

972 A.C., mining excavations on the moon’s surface by the New Lunar Republic uncover what was believed to be the remnants of the lost Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000. But what they actually found was the near 3000 year old scrap remnants of the Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 prototype. She was brought to Earth for rigorous testing.

981 A.C., incorporating the lunar remnants, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. was built. This version was equipped with the most up to date weaponry for the time, including but not limited to, fully automated machine guns, rocket propelled grenade launchers, bunker busting missile silos and state fo the art laser cannons. The upper body was mounted on an 20CI10SF Tank for maximum combat stability and effectiveness.

987 A.C. a movie script was written based on historical accounts related to Mecha Death Sparkle & Super Mecha Death Sparkle. Unfortunately due to copyright laws, names and locations had to be changed and the movie was put on hold until being re-released under the name 'Pacific Rim.'

989 A.C. Construction of Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 2.0 is completed. A laser array was mounted on her horn and she was given the capability to shoot energy beams from eyes.

997 A.C. Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 2.5 was fully updated. She was equipped with a vocal synthesizer system. A product forged through years of intense study, educational cramming, late night library trips, frequent academic testing and regular friendship reports, had ultimately bred a mare of extreme aggression and undistilled fury. All she could do was scream in rage as she unleashed her wrath on the world around her.

998 A.C., amidst her path of vindictive decimation, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 2.5 was captured by Lord Tirek and reprogrammed for the goal of global interdimensional conquest.

999 A.C. after his reign of terror in the land of Generation 1 was challenged, Tirek unleashes the latest, most destructive weapon in his arsenal: the automated, cyberized, cold fusion powered, combat mech unit, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 3.0 Beta. Vocabulary was increased by 20%, in as quickly as ten seconds.
“BOOKS!”
-SMDS2KPCV3.0 Beta, 999 A.C.

A new rocket propulsion system was added to her tank base for more efficient pursuit, catapulting her up to 2200 meters in the air at speeds of 514 wing power. But only for distances up to 2.5 kilometers. Her attempts to raze the entire world to the ground resulted in the slaughtering of many flutter ponies and guest celebrities such as Danny Devito, Venus Terzo & Chuck Liddell.

In the year 1000 A.C., a dimensional shift occurred on the quantum level and reality as it is once known was reset. The events of Super Mecha Death Sparkle P.C. Version 3.0 Beta’s massacre are forgotten to all but herself, as she drifted through the fabric of hyperspace.

1002 A.C., the long lost Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 was finally discovered and recovered, having crash landed on Butterfly island deep in the south poncific ocean.

1004 A.C. the Amarerican military under funding and direction from the New Lunar Republic upgrade Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 to Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 the 2nd. During her first combat trial, she is possessed by Lord Tirek and becomes the next weapon in his arsenal of global dominance. Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 the 2nd is unleashed to unleash unbridled carnage upon the world.

But right in the midst of her onslaught, a quantum singularity opens, and descending from the depths of hyperspace arrived Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 3.0 Beta. Having spent untold amounts of time upgrading herself, she merged as Super Mecha Death Sparkle P.C. Version 3.1. The two colossal weaponized marriages of mare and machine engaged in an all out war to the brutal death.

The current and former weapons for evil incarnate battled in a back and forth duel that spanned all over the surface of the globe for seven long and bloody days. On the 8th day, harnessing the pure vengeance she desired to inflict upon her manipulator and channelling the inner spiritual essence of her foremother, Death Sparkle, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 3.1 defeated Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 the 2nd. Soon afterwards, Super Mecha Death Sparkle P.C. Version 3.1 used her overwhelming might to drive Tirek back down to the depths of Tartarus. After the battle's conclusion, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C. Version 3.1 layed Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 the 2nd to a proper final rest.

1008 A.C. Tirek takes possession of all the members of the Hasbro corporation's animation team and manipulate them to create My Little Pony: Once Upon A Pony Time, more infamously known as the latest guerrilla terrorism force of Lord Tirek: The Newborn Cuties. The defenders of the Generation 3 and Generation 3.5 faiths break away in rebellion and join forces to battle back Tirek’s army of atrocities. The battle had seemed to have no end in sight. But when the bell struck two minutes to midnight, a lion from the north emerged to tip the scales. The self upgraded, Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C Version 4.0 Beta arrived to fight alongside the G3 & 3.5 defenders, completely decimating the forces of her ex-master in a vulgar display of power, sending him and the remnants of his tattered minions back to the depths of Tartarus.

Later that same year, war erupted between Hasbro’s legal branch and DHX studios. The legal branch saw that they weren't gaining ground thanks to the fervent support of the creative community, so they made a deal with the Centaur and channeled the power of Tirek to turn the tide in favor of dated copyright laws, court injunctions, gag orders and C&D notices. But the malicious summoning did not go unnoticed, and Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C Version 4.0 Beta entered the battle, shattering the spirit of the legal branch and permanently severing Tireks connection to the outside realms for good. Super Mecha Death Sparkle 2000 P.C Version 4.0 Beta ventured to the skies beyond, her battle cries drifting across the wind forevermore. The future had finally been secured for DHX studio and they finally began to work on their plans for a new show, a show that had the potential to be magic…

Moral of the story: The goodness inside one's heart will eternally triumph over evil, no matter how deep the corruption may lay.

Don't care if it's hated. It's here and it's here to stay. Read it or don't.