Friendship is Card Games: Bloom and Gloom · 12:06pm Apr 19th, 2015
Presented for you consideration, one Apple Bloom, founding member of the Cutie Mark Crusaders. But now, the Crusade is approaching its Jerusalem. Did those hooves in recent time tread this land of thought and mind? Well, we’ll soon see. Here, in the Twilight Zone.
Seriously, this was the most wonderfully surreal thing I’ve seen out of this show since “Party of One.” Certainly an interesting twist on the “Crusader with a mark worries about her friends’ reaction” plot. (Also, writing Rod Serling-style intros is hard.)
Scissors? Really? That’s what they’re going for with Babs? Well, I’m disappointed. I wasn’t expecting my entrepreneur headcanon to be confirmed, but still.
Canon confirmation: If you’ve completed the Crusade, you can’t stay in it. At least, that was the policy at the start of the episode. That may get revised soon.
Personally, I don’t think it’s possible to get a cutie mark you personally dislike, or one you don’t understand. If you want to read more of my rambling on the subject, see here.
I do love the parallels between Apple Bloom and Twilight. Both are more high-strung than a gallows, quite intelligent, and the unofficial leaders of their respective groups. Applejack is a good Spike.
Speaking of whom, between the mysterious cutie mark remover and the prominent pancakes, it seems that Applejack’s been telling Apple Bloom of her recent exploits.
The horrible balloon horse from “The Mysterious Mare-Do-Well” still exists. Why does the horrible balloon horse still exist?
Blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment: In the fourth iteration, as the surreality spikes, it isn’t a rooster that awakens Apple Bloom. It’s Pinkie in her Nightmare Night costume, floating on balloons. All she needs is someone with a lance riding on her.
Unless we count the theme song or the flashback to “The Best Night Ever,” Luna showed up before Celestia this season. Neat. Also, she’s definitely gotten the hang of modern diction… which is actually kind of a shame. I like archaic, bombastic Luna, but that’s not the Luna the Crusaders needed at this juncture.
I have to say, the twist here… well, it genuinely was a twist. I certainly wasn't expecting an antagonist out of Jungian psychology. Of course, the writers were likely exploiting our expectations after Starlight got away, but still, didn’t see that one coming. Also, it seems everypony has a dark side whispering in their ear. Fortunately, Luna is uniquely qualified to address problems with those.
Also, this anxiety over cutie marks has likely been lingering in the backs of the Crusaders’ minds for a long time. I think Luna may have just broken the mental block that was enforcing the blank-flank status quo. Of course, given that the American Idol-esque scene came from this episode, that remains to be seen…
None-too-subtle hints at Sweetie and Scootaloo’s talents, emphasizing the point about that mental block. Dream Rarity is still living up to being the Bearer of Generosity. Also, it’s kind of depressing that Scootaloo’s first real airtime… well, isn’t real. I still hope she can fly in real life.
Turns out Terror Incognita was pretty close to the actual Apple Bloom and Luna episode. Worrying about the future, Apple Bloom tormenting herself, doors. Though Luna didn’t have any trouble taking Apple Bloom out of her dreamscape, so the Crusaders probably aren’t the three Horses of the Apocalypse. Probably.
Also, it’s interesting to consider the structure of the Crusaders’ Luna-attracting dreams. Scootaloo’s was a hunt, a chase, an athletic contest of life and death. Sweetie Belle’s was a performance, or at least it was going to be one. And Apple Bloom’s? It was a clockwork mechanism, repeating itself as it ran down. This is best seen in how Applejack repeated the same line when she first saw Apple Bloom in each iteration. Something to think about.
Now, pull up a stack of pancakes and enjoy:
Lucid Dreaming 1W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has flying.
As long as enchanted creature is tapped, it can block as though it were untapped.
A little clarity goes a long way.
Disown 2W
Sorcery
Exile target creature if it shares a creature type with another creature its controller controls.
Some dishonor is too great for even family to forgive.
Depressing Drizzle U
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
U: Enchanted creature gets -2/-0 until end of turn.
Using weather to control the battlefield and demoralize the enemy has been a pegasus battle tactic since time immemorial.
Dismal Destiny 2U
Sorcery
Fateseal 3. (Look at the top three cards of an opponent's library, then put any number of them on the bottom of that player's library and the rest on top in any order.)
Few ponies have fates as heroic as the Bearers'.
Ditzy’s Dolphin 2U
Creature — Dolphin
Islandwalk
When Ditzy’s Dolphin enters the battlefield, target player reveals his or her hand.
”Most dolphins only care about fun, but this one answers to a higher porpoise.”
2/2
Edge of Slumber 3UU
Instant
Simultaneously untap all tapped creatures and tap all untapped creatures.
”It is a strange and precarious state, where a single push can move a thousand ponies in or out of my realm.”
—Princess Luna
Dreaming Epiphany 4UU
Sorcery
Draw a card for each tapped creature target player controls.
Retrace (You may cast this card from your graveyard by discarding a land card in addition to paying its other costs.)
Surreal Figment 5U
Creature — Illusion
Flying
Surreal Figment gets +1/+1 for each tapped creature on the battlefield.
”When you see Pinkie Pie in your dreams, be very concerned.”
—Princess Luna
1/1
Spurn the Meek B
Sorcery
Destroy target creature if it has the lowest converted mana cost or is tied for lowest converted mana cost among creatures on the battlefield.
”Respect is like anything else: You get what you pay for.”
—Diamond Tiara
Tormenting Shade B
Creature — Shade
B, Pay 1 life: Tormenting Shade gets +1/+1 until end of turn.
”If one listens to it for long enough, it is the shadow who casts the pony.”
—Princess Luna
0/1
Manehattan Stylist 1B
Creature — Pony Citizen
B, T: Remove a counter from target permanent.
”For the last time, lady, I may be an earth pony, but I can’t make your hair grow.”
2/1
Experienced Pestpony 2B
Creature — Pony Warrior
Protection from tokens
His knowledge of Equestria’s many vermin is outweighed only by his desire to stop using it.
2/2
Negative Outlook 2B
Sorcery
Fateseal 2. The fatesealed player reveals the top card of his or her library, then loses life equal to that card’s converted mana cost.
Harsh Critics 2RR
Creature — Pony
If a source would deal damage to a permanent or player, it deals that much plus 1 damage to that permanent or player instead.
”Simply dreadful.”
—Octavia, orchestral assassin
3/3
Breakfast Burst 1G
Instant
Put X +1/+1 counters on target creature, where X is one plus the number of cards named Breakfast Burst in all graveyards.
As sweet as a family's love.
Apple Family Lullaby 2G
Enchantment — Song
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a verse counter on Apple Family Lullaby.
2G, Sacrifice Apple Family Lullaby: Choose up to X target artifacts and/or enchantments, where X is the number of verse counters on Apple Family Lullaby. Those permanents’ owners shuffle them into their libraries.
Whipped Ooze 2G
Creature — Ooze
Whenever an opponent activates an activated ability of an artifact, put a +1/+1 counter on Whipped Ooze.
Every stab and shot only makes it lighter, frothier, and hungrier.
2/2
Pestpony’s Rig 5
Artifact Creature — Construct
When Pestpony’s Rig enters the battlefield, destroy target token.
Some creatures just can’t live in harmony. That’s where the pestponies come in.
3/3
Regressing Gust WU
Instant
Target creature loses all abilities until end of turn. Destroy all Auras attached to that creature.
The spell restores innocence, leaving its victims unaware of what they just lost.
Cloud of Twittermites URG
Creature — Pest
Flying
When Cloud of Twittermites enters the battlefield, it deals 1 damage to target creature or player.
Whenever Cloud of Twittermites deals combat damage to a player, put a token that’s a copy of Cloud of Twittermites onto the battlefield.
1/1
Retire 1WB
Sorcery
Target player exiles a creature he or she controls.
”Retirement parties aren’t so different from others. Sure, the snacks and the music need to be adjusted, but it’s still happy ponies celebrating something.”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Triumphant Cry 1GW
Instant
Target creature you control gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each creature you control. Untap all creatures you control.
A shout of joy so loud, most ponies will rush in expecting to care for the dying.
Bait 3G//Switch 5U
Sorcery//Sorcery
Bait: All creatures able to block target creature this turn do so.
Switch: Exchange control of two target creatures.
Have to admit, I was definitely surprised when Starlight didn't show up. Would the target audience catch that? I didn't really watch TV when I was that age. I imagine if they were going to kick out CMC members for getting their marks, they'll probably reconsider after Apple Bloom's dreams.
I love that ditzy's dolphin parallels Chandra's phoenix. I like your design of twittermites more then my own, I thought more of squadron hawks and each gets bigger for the other on the battlefield. I'm pretty sure even Luna says it's impossible to dislike your cutiemark without being certifiably insane confirming many a headcannon, the quote is something along the lines of "your cutiemark is the totality of who you are, to deny it is to deny yourself."
The one thing I didn't like about the episode is that it was obviously a dream, and I kept asking, where is Luna? Took her long enough to show up.
2996636
I don't have any young girls available for a poll, but I think they caught on. It's only been two weeks.
2996727
I originally considered some kind of scaling damage effect based on the number of Pests you control, but that would've been prohibitively expensive for a 1/1 flier. I went with exponential growth instead.
2996880
The Crusaders aren't the only ponies in Equestria with troubled dreams.
I swore in genuine anger when it was revealed to not be Starlight. Even when I was unable to mentally answer the question of why she would be tormenting one filly she doesn't even know.
I was mostly appeased when Luna happened, but still.
It's also interesting to note that in both dreams where the cutie mark was a solid fixture, they both had something to do with chemicals. Potions and Pests... and Poison has something to do with both of those. So that's another layer on Apple Bloom's Dream Imagery. That heavily leads into something mechanical, physical, scientific...
Well, if there was a shade planeswalker who went to Ungula...
2997068
I find Shadow Bloom (Apple Gloom?) fascinating because of the ramifications for pony psychology and the potential consequences if Luna hadn't intervened. Imagine Fluttershy's struggles with her shadow. Pinkie Pie's. Twilight's. There is some rich potential here, and as such, I am more than willing to forgive the bait and switch.
2997340
A good point. Also consider the pestpony equipment that Apple Bloom literally designed in her sleep. Her brain took a profession she'd never consciously considered and built its requisite technology in an instant.
2998007
I'm honestly not sure whether that hapless shade would be more afraid of Celestia or Luna. Burning sunlight, or mastery over shadows?
Well, now we know how the Nightmare Force begins taking over a pony. Good thing Luna was there to bring it down to size, or else we might be facing Nightmare Cutie.
"THE CRUSADE WILL LAST FOREVER!"
Suggestions:
Nightmare Force - BBB
Enchant Creature
Taps target creature when cast.
If there are fewer than three counters on Nightmare Force during untap phase, do not untap enchanted creature as normal. Instead place a counter on Nightmare Force.
If there are three counters on Nightmare Force, enchanted creature gains +3/+3 and does not tap when attacking.
Nightmare Cutie - 1GGB
Summon Legendary Pony
When Nightmare Cutie attacks a player with creatures, owner of Nightmare Cutie selects one of that player's creatures. That creature must be used to block Nightmare Cutie.
2/4
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS EVIL OVERLORDS, YAAAAY!" This is the sound Princess Luna hears in her own less pleasant dreams.
2999602 We're ticking down. Maybe her cutie mark will be something like an Apple superimposed over a gear?
3000356
There definitely are some similarities with Nightmare Rarity, though this time, no Gravity Falls characters were involved.
Also, I'm sorry, but I'm compelled to modernize those cards:
Nightmare Force BBB
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
When Nightmare Force enters the battlefield, tap enchanted creature.
At the beginning of the upkeep of enchanted creature's controller, if there are fewer than three despair counters on Nightmare Force, put a despair counter on it.
If there are fewer than three despair counters on Nightmare Force, enchanted creature doesn't untap during its controller's untap step. Otherwise, enchanted creature gets +3/+3 and has vigilance.
(Also, the effect is white-blue.)
Nightmare Cutie 1BGG
Legendary Creature — Pony
Whenever Nightmare Cutie attacks, target creature defending player controls blocks it this combat if able.
"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS EVIL OVERLORDS, YAAAAY!" This is the sound Princess Luna hears in her own less pleasant dreams.
2/4
(Rather underpowered, and not very black. Compare Avalanche Tusker
I really liked this episode, start to finish. I guess last week's was just a fluke.
You're a sucker if you thought they were going to bring back an arc villain that quickly though. That's not the kind of show this is. I was expecting it to be just an ordinary nightmare while silently hoping it would be some new bizarre monster out of the Everfree. The "it's your own shadow" bit was a nice touch though.
Then again, I can't call you naive when I was really hoping that she would get her mark at the end of the episode. I mean yes, status quo is god, but on the other hand this would have been the perfect time to do it and strengthened the episode's message/impact (at least in my opinion, others may differ). Besides, they reformed Discord during a non-finale episode and that stuck. But if they didn't do it during episode, they're probably not going to do it at all (unless it is the ENTIRE focus of the episode).
As for the structure of the dream, don't forget that we only saw the end of each dream. Apple Bloom's didn't look very structured by then either.
Anyways, card games:
Lucid Dreaming: That's a pretty interesting effect. I suspect if you searched really hard through the entire cardlist, you might find one or two cards that interacts with more positively than just vigilance or canceling out a "tap this creature when X happens" disadvantage. You'd have to look though.
Dismal Destiny: It's a shame that never became a real mechanic. Anyways, it's weird looking at a card that doesn't touch the battlefield, anyone's life totals or draw/discard cards and not being able to say it's underpowered, but that's probably ensuring an average of 1.5 dead card draws, so if all you need is time, this buys it.
Ditzy’s Dolphin: Creature - Dolphin? We're definitely in the silver borders, but something tells me it won't catch on as well as the Ass tribal.
Edge of Slumber: You thought I was tapped out, but it is really YOU that is tapped out! Except not really because if you use it during their attack phase then whoever they attacked with untaps, so for fullest effect you want to use it as YOU attack while they (or ideally both of you) were trying to turtle.
Dreaming Epiphany: Pretty interesting. The mind games are strong with this one, since you can recast it as many times as it's worth 6 mana (you're sure to draw some extra lands).
That said, when I first read it though I misread it as being Rebound instead, which would possibly be even cooler on the mind games front. Rebound would put your opponent in a bind; they could choose not to attack to block it, but "draw a few cards and your opponents won't attack you next turn" is a pretty good effect itself. Plus you could just attack yourself
Surreal Figment: Nooo, not Dream Pinkie Pie! We're all doomed! Anyways I doubt this card would earn you 6 mana worth of utility on offense, but it'd be pretty cool as a defender. Might want to give it hexproof/shroud though; if you can lose a 6 mana creature to a pinger that creature needs to have a much scarier ability than this.
Spurn the Meek: Pretty cool effect. The obvious thought is token decks; an opponent playing tokens is guaranteed to give you a valid target but it's guaranteed to not be worth it. Oh also: Pernicious Deed to guarantee that the lowest cost creature on the table is something worth killing.
Tormenting Shade: Oh neat! I guess you really can print a 1 mana shade. Also nice flavor text.
Manehattan Stylist: Aww, why is poor Babs Seed black? That said, the abuses for this card aren't hard to imagine, though she's not going to activate Dark Depths for you.
Experienced Pestpony: Words I've never seen printed on a card before, but probably should have.
Negative Outlook: Oh that's nasty! Your choice: Is it a finisher spell, or do they draw junk cards for the next turn or two? Probably depends on what the two cards are.
Harsh Critics: I'm now picturing a wrestling announcer giving a blow-by-blow with such tortured analogies that it causes the victim's brain to hurt.
Apple Family Lullaby: Well, it is removal and card advantage at the same time. It's hard to argue against that at any price.
Whipped Ooze: Toss one more card into the infinitely large Mycosynth Lattice combo deck. Not bad on its own either.
Regressing Gust: Oooh, really love the flavor here.
Cloud of Twittermites: Nice. As long as they don't have flying defenses the swarm and the pinging grow exponentially, but it looks kinda easy to stop it before it starts without some outside support.
Retire: Cruel Edict with exile for W more? It doesn't get much fairer than that.
Bait//Switch: Oh come on, you people were REALLY expecting them to bring back an arc villain two episodes later on this show? Did you even watch the last four seasons?
Edit: 3001020 How about these cards instead?
Consuming Nightmare 1UB
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
At the beginning of the upkeep of enchanted creature's controller, put a despair counter on enchanted creature.
If there are three or more despair counters on enchanted creature, you control enchanted creature, enchanted creature has Intimidate and Wither, and Consuming Nightmare has hexproof.
One must stop the corruption of soul before it can take root, or watch as the one you love is twisted beyond saving.
((Yes I know they saved Luna, but it took POWERFUL magic; way more than it would have if caught as early as Apple Bloom was. And you can still beat this by bouncing/flickering the creature or nuking all enchantments. Also I realized after I was done that Intimidate isn't very scary on a stolen creature! So I added a second black-sounding-but-multicolor keyword.))
Nightmare Bloom 2BBG
Legendary Creature — Pony
Creatures without abilities gain +1/+1. Other creatures with abilities get -2/-2.
2/3
"Cutie Marks bring nothing but pain. The world would be so much better without them... or their bearers."
3000976
Possible. Or an apple with the stem forming the handle of a tool.
3002058
I was kind of hoping Starlight would be pulling guerilla tactics, striking opportunistically at vulnerable points. Remember, this is a season that opened with a cult compound where the protagonists' souls got torn off. I'm not putting anything past them.
Lucid Dreaming: Shadowmoor-block untap abilities and the inspired mechanic both come to mind. Especially King Macar.
Ditzy’s Dolphin: Actually not the first time I've made a Dolphin. That was Lucky Dolphin, one of the "For Whom the Sweetie Belle Toils" cards. Besides, the game already has Whales.
Dreaming Epiphany: Actually, you can't attack yourself. The active player is defined as the attacking player, and the nonactive player is defined as the defending player. (CR 506.2) As the names imply, you can only attack a defending player or planeswalker a defending player controls.
Tormenting Shade: There actually is a 1-cost Shade: Slithering Shade.
Manehattan Stylist: Babs is heroic black. (Also, I had to think of a design that said "hairdresser" and went with counter removal.)
Harsh Critics: And now I'm imagining Vinyl and Octavia trying to announce a
footballhoofball game when neither of them knows anything about the sport. Meanwhile, Rarity is trying her best not to reveal her father-granted encyclopedic knowledge of the game.Bait//Switch: It could also refer to the expectations of those who expected Apple Bloom to come out of this with a cutie mark.
3002177 I think that would look a bit silly, honestly... and it implies that she'd want to tear up her family's livelihood. I mean, a tool? Don't those have to be carved...like...out of wood? Sorry. I'm being a bit silly.
3002177
Lucid Dreaming: Oh, how about one of those cards that does something "as long as it remains tapped" and gives you the option of not untapping it? I bet there's even one of those that triggers on combat damage somewhere, which means you could use this to properly abuse it.
Ditzy's Dolphin: Oh, but if Dolphin Tribal is going to be a real thing we need some evil dolphins to represent what dolphins actually act like (around each other, not around us).
Dreaming Epiphany: When I said "attack yourself", I meant "attack with your own creatures instead of relying on your opponent to leave some of his/her creatures tapped".
Tormenting Shade: You learn something every day! There's also a rat that does something very similar to your card.
Bait//Switch: Touche.
edit: Also, no response to my version of Consuming Nightmare and Nightmare Bloom?
3002275
Sorry, didn't see the edit.
Both cards look good. My only complaint is that Consuming Nightmare works better as a normal blue-black card than a hybrid one. Remember, hybrid cards should work when presented as either color. This one combines elements from both colors too much to really qualify.
3002309 You're right. Done.
2999602
I agree with you, it's just that that sort of concept is yet another huge thing that could be worthy of being developed over the course of another full season.
A Season 6.
This is Season 5 and dammit, I want my Starlight.
applebloom-iwantitnao.gif
3013769
Yes, but what happens if you get her and she isn't what you wanted? Or everyone else hates her? Or she isn't an apple?
Wait, what were we talking about, again?
3013779
You joke, but I'm fully expecting the writers to do the exact opposite of what I want with Starlight.
And on that day you will see me implode like nothing else. MMC will be a mere blip in comparison.
(There's no doubt that Starlight will be an apple, though. I truly don't know where people get ideas of otherwise
.)
3013804
Oh, trust me, I'm right there with you. The background pony episode is probably not going to be fun for me.
3013811
They'll all turn out to be apples.