I'm exhausted emotionally and physically · 11:10pm Mar 29th, 2015
Hay everyone usually I don't like to talk about personal problems but I really don't feel like keeping this one in right now ok here's what's going on the 20th my father was admitted to the hospital because of a massive stroke now you see the thing is my father did not take good care of himself in this is the the fifth massive he's had so they put him in rehab on Thursday and on Friday he had another massive stroke we get called to the hospital and he was not doing so good so we got there and we were pretty sure this would be our last goodbyes and boy did he not look good I'm not going to get into it I'm just going to say I'm glad it wasn't me on the bed anyway we were there for three hours and we left at 7 because he seemed to be doing better but at around 1 a.m. we got a call saying that after they moved him into a new room he had passed away
I really wish I was there to give you a hug. There's nothing I can say about this that will make you feel better. You just gotta keep moving forward, buddy.
I am so sorry for your loss
God Bless you.
2922403 your kind words are more than enough thank you
2922409 thank you
I'm really sorry.
But, it will get better. Trust me.
2922496 I know as they say time heals all wounds
2922506 It's true, that saying.
2922511 I know
2922519
Your dad died of a stroke? Wow.
...if it's any consolation, about two years ago my dad also died of a stroke, so I know how you feel and am sorry for your loss.
-Kirb, got sunshine in a bag. (yt • da • tr) fc08.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2015/019/3/b/sig_by_flyingbrickanimation-d8elwjm.png
2922666 thank you it is
Wow, I completely sympathize.
I had a similar situation a couple of years ago. It was late, I was spending some time on campus late at night (midnight-ish) and I got a call from my older sister. An uncle of mine had passed away, and she was letting family know what had happened. She told me to forward the news to my dad, because he was doing volunteer work overseas for the Baha'I Faith, and she didn't have his number (I did, which was why she called). I must have been super tired, because there was no emotion in my voice when I relayed the news. My dad said, "Uncle ______?! No, it couldn't be him!"
The emotion didn't register consciously even as my dad flew back to the States to help with funeral arrangements and to support the surviving members of my uncle's family. It didn't register as I saw the faces of my cousins, who discovered him shortly after he died in his sleep due to a heart attack.
The emotion hit when the observance of the life he lived was held. It was held in a small community center, and the room was packed beyond its capacity. There was no standing room, period. My uncle was active in the Baha'i Community, and when I saw the impact his life had on those around him, that was the moment I cried my heart out. Everyone could feel the emotion, and everyone freely expressed their sorrow at his passing. Seeing that helped me accept the reality of his passing.
Now... what I would like to say next comes from my experience as a religious person, and as a Baha'i. I do not know if you are religious, or if you have a specific set of beliefs that I might accidentally trample on with what I am going to say next. I sincerely hope that, at the very least, you take it as a well-wishing for the memory of your father, and as the best expression of comfort I as a stranger on the Internet can give you. I apologize if this doesn't have that result.
The Baha'i perspective on death is that it is the moment a person's soul moves on to the Next World, or what we call the Abha Kingdom (Kingdom of Glory). It is here where all the positive virtues and qualities a person has developed over the course of their lives can finally be exercised to their fullest, much like how a baby finally gets to use their arms and legs to their fullest after being born from the mother's womb. Thus, physical death is a spiritual birth into the spiritual reality, which Baha'is consider to be the True Reality; the physical world is seen as a mere reflection of the Spiritual Worlds of the One True God, much like how the "world" in a mirror does not actually exist in the physical world, it's just a reflection of whatever it faces. Thus, a person's soul is considered to be whom they truly are, and that the physical world is just a shell that is cast off when physical death happens.
As Baha'u'llah, the Founder of the Baha'i Faith, has said:
"O SOUL OF THE SUPREME! I have made death a messenger of joy to thee; wherefore dost thou grieve?"
So, from a Baha'i perspective, your father is more free than he has ever been. All his positive qualities are allowed to function at their highest potential, and his negative qualities have passed away with his body. He finally can be the fullest extent of his true self, and he has all the Spiritual Worlds of God to explore and delight in for all eternity. He has not truly disappeared from your life, just because his body has died; he has moved to a new stage of his life. When your time comes, you will be reunited with him.
Of course, trying to accelerate this process of physical death into spiritual birth via suicide will spiritually cripple yourself, as far as Baha'is know, so if you truly miss him that much to go that far, know that you will make your life in the Next World much harder to live than if you waited for it to naturally happen. Your body will die one way or another, there is no need to take your death into your own hands when death will come for you when your soul is ready for the transition. Plus, you will have all of eternity to spend with your father in the Next World when your time comes. You will have plenty of time with your father to look forward to in the Next World, and getting there faster gives you no increase or benefit to add to that eternity.
I only wrote the above paragraph, because I have no idea what your emotional state may be, and I figured it was prudent to cover that subject. If that paragraph doesn't apply, then I apologize for my assumption.
So, to conclude, I will leave a couple Baha'i prayers for you, one from Abdu'l-Baha, the Son of Baha'u'llah and his successor, and another from Baha'u'llah, in the hopes that they comfort your heart in this stressful time. I wish you the best of luck, for you and your father.
"O my God! O Thou forgiver of sins, bestower of gifts, dispeller of afflictions!
Verily, I beseech thee to forgive the sins of such as have abandoned the physical garment and have ascended to the spiritual world.
O my Lord! Purify them from trespasses, dispel their sorrows, and change their darkness into light. Cause them to enter the garden of happiness, cleanse them with the most pure water, and grant them to behold Thy splendors on the loftiest mount."
-Abdu'l-Baha
"Glory be to Thee, O Lord my God! Abase not him whom Thou hast exalted through the power of Thine everlasting sovereignty, and remove not far from Thee him whom Thou hast caused to enter the tabernacle of Thine eternity. Wilt Thou cast away, O my God, him whom Thou hast overshadowed with Thy Lordship, and wilt Thou turn away from Thee, O my Desire, him to whom Thou hast been a refuge? Canst Thou degrade him whom Thou hast uplifted, or forget him whom Thou didst enable to remember Thee?
Glorified, immeasurably glorified art Thou! Thou art adored in Thy truth, and Thee do we all, verily, worship; and Thou art manifest in Thy justice, and to thee do we all, verily, bear witness. Thou art, in truth, beloved in Thy grace. No God is there but Thee, the Help in Peril, the Self-Subsisting."
-Baha'u'llah
Sincerely,
Mr. Album
I am sorry for your loss.
God bless.