• Member Since 3rd Sep, 2011
  • offline last seen 8 hours ago

PresentPerfect


Fanfiction masochist. :B She/they https://ko-fi.com/presentperfect

More Blog Posts2550

  • Saturday
    Twilight the 没用

    Yesterday, a fellow named SoothingBell asked if they could translate Twilight the Useless to Chinese, and no way was I gonna say no. :D

    And they turned it around in 24 hours, amazing!

    https://fimtale.com/t/64723

    4 comments · 132 views
  • 1 week
    Idle musing

    so-called because that's what led me to the realization

    What is so compelling about the idea of "warrior woman runs afoul of a wizard and is flung centuries into the future" that I made it happen twice?

    ...And with slightly more musing, I also realize, in a roundabout way, it was with the same wizard. >_> Huh.

    Read More

    7 comments · 165 views
  • 1 week
    Fic recs, March 20th!

    Posting a day earlier than usual because the next reading is a long one!

    H: 1 R: 2 C: 1 V: 1 N: 3

    Read More

    6 comments · 194 views
  • 2 weeks
    Fic recs, March 14th!

    Lotus Moon has done a reading of Fleety's What's Philomena's Name?!

    Hey, help out Regidar, he's looking for experimental fics! Self-promotion allowed!

    Read More

    5 comments · 236 views
  • 2 weeks
    Fic recs, March 8th: Top Ten of 2023!

    Whaaaaat, two review blogs in a row?

    Well hell yes, because I have done much better with the top ten this year and I am inordinately pleased with myself! :3 here's the explanation of the setup, for all that it has never adequately explained what's going on to like, literally anyone:

    Read More

    19 comments · 274 views
Nov
2nd
2014

Present Perfect vs. Fall of Equestria (Not my finest hour) · 11:25pm Nov 2nd, 2014

Funny story:

I decided to go get some recording done today, as I've got lines I owe someone, plus the next chapter of the story I've been editing. "Going to record" is a rather involved process, requiring me to lug my laptop, microphone, various cables, table and chair up the steps and jam them all into my room, along with positioning various blankets in key locations to cut down on reflected sound and hope I didn't forget anything. It usually takes about ten minutes, followed by turning the laptop on and opening the various programs I need to do my recording.

I use two programs, one for the actual recording and one for its superior ability to cut noise out of raw audio. Well, the first one popped up and said "You need to register!" Nevermind that I've been using it since I got the new laptop and had already registered. So I hit okay. The thing came up saying "do you want this to modify your computer, etc." and I said yes. And then nothing happened. Again, and again, and again. I uninstalled the program and reinstalled. Nothing.

Fuck Sony. Their shitty-ass software always breaks the fuck down if you use it long enough, and I am so pissed off that I wasted all that fucking time I could have been writing for absolutely nothing. >:(

So, in a horrible snit, I decided I would read something that would give me a real reason to be pissed off, and BOY HOWDY WAS I RIGHT.

Okay, where to begin. The actual story I read is Twilight Falls: A Fall of Equestria Tale, by Sunny Night. This is the author's only story and, from what I can gather, the first actual Fall of Equestria tale. A word to wise: If you don't know anything about Fall of Equestria, for God's sake do not bother to find out. You are better off remaining untouched by it. Just trust me and skip to the rating or else just close the blog, you won't miss anything.

What I knew about FOE (all-caps to differentiate from FoE, aka Fallout Equestria) beforehand was that it involved caribou subjugating pony mares; that it was based on a Tumblr (which thank God you can't Google for), and that the various tales have been commissioned by whoever created the artwork; and that a lot, I mean metric hectares of fucktons of people are super-mad that it even exists.

I am now among their number.

There are ways to push the boundaries of decency, and rewards when it's done well. I've praised stories like Love.Sick for doing awful things that I did not enjoy, but pulling them off effectively. But fucksake, even Cupcakes is better than this trash.

Yes, trash. I am not one to moralize and I am not one to be non-constructive, but I am throwing any semblance of professionalism out the window for this review. I mad.

Fact is, I could have taken a horrible tale about Equestria being brought low and Twilight having to save it. But that's not this tale. Even a story about Twilight being mind-raped into... whatever she ends up doing, I didn't read that far, would have worked if the author had had any ability to write. But the writing is rushed and the setup perfunctory, existing solely to get to the "good" stuff.

Oh yeah, I should mention the story currently has, as of this writing, 5 chapters, of which I read 3 and a bit. I stopped when the unicorn mares were being marched down the street with their horns shoved up their asses. I sense a theme, considering my reaction to something similar in FoE...

Ugh, this review is disjointed as fuck. Okay, okay. So I don't even care what the setup is, what matters is the writing is rushing for its target, and quite a few major characters are immediately out of character, Twilight foremost among them. Her first thought upon seeing the caribou -- who just show the fuck up out of nowhere -- is "Run, leave everyone behind." When Rainbow Dash suggests they stay and fight, Applejack argues against it. Also, I have no idea where the fuck Spike was. Also did I mention this is anthro? Who cares.

The caribou themselves are awful. Sure, I didn't get far enough in to find out anything about their society, but I really don't give a fuck. Again, they just show up without warning and immediately start their subjugation thing. They're huge, they have armor that deflects magic so the ponies really can't put up any fight, they exist as an unstoppable obstacle, they're basically evil Mary Sues.

The things they do are pretty horrifying, as I've already suggested. It's told to us that they somehow got Discord on our side, as well as Cadence and Shining Armor, by corrupting the Crystal Heart. (OP much?) They cut off unicorn horns and pluck wings, and I am very glad I didn't stick around long enough to see that happen to Twilight, if only because she's our POV character. The scenes involving Celestia and Cadence are bad enough to read. And see, again, that kind of thing could be a good element in a story, with good writing backing it up and used for something other than exploitative porn. (See also The Colour You Bleed.)

That's about where I gave up. I hate that the worst thing I can blame the author for is not saying "no" to the person who commissioned this. I hope she's getting a lot of money to write this thing.

Having been part of the furry fandom for more than a decade, I am not in the habit of kink-shaming, but this is not a kink, it's awful. I was going to call it "Gorean", but then I looked up what that actually means, and I think they would be horrified at what goes on in this setting. This is domination and submission for hXc edgy internet perverts who know even less about actual BDSM than I do.

And you know what? That's not even what gets me maddest, even though the execrable way women are treated in this story makes me want to sign up with the SJWs and peddle competitive oppression until my brain leaks out my nose. It's the way this offal overtly, dare I say gleefully, shits on the very show that somehow inspired it. There's a line that I'm not bothering to look up, spoken after Celestia is defeated by the caribou leader, to the effect of, "You thought friendship was magic, but lol, you're wrong". Fuck. That.

This is an utterly reprehensible piece of fiction, and there is nothing more to be said for it than:

0/5

This should not have been written. Now let's all do our best to forget it was.

Yeah, I have a parody planned. :B

Report PresentPerfect · 943 views ·
Comments ( 81 )

Yeah, I have a parody planned. :B

THAT'LL SHOW THEM! YOU GO GET THEM WITH YOUR EBIN PARODY!!11!1
THEN THEY'LL BE SURE TO STOP ONCE YOU'VE OH SO CLEVERLY SATIRIZED THEM! OH YEAAAAH!

I feel sick to my stomach.

You poor bastard. Nobody should ever have to go through something as awful as that.

The story sounds pretty bad, too.

Yeah, I have a parody planned. :B

God McFucking dammit all, PP.

I am now among their number.

Welcome to the fold, brother PresentPerfect.

My vague understanding about that first FOE fic is that it was posted on an alternate account of someone else on the site. No clue who that someone else might be.

Yeah, I have a parody planned. :B

Please, no matter the plot, call it Autumn of Equestria. Do it for me, man.

As per the review: what on Earth were you expecting, dude? I'm actually surprised you're this mad. This story is infamous for a reason. I've never had any kind of contact with FOE myself, 'cept for simple pop cultural osmosis, and I even with that I already know it's far too extreme for me to enjoy. Half the fetishesout there are all about power, and FOE is just a mix between extreme S&M and some other bullshit I don't really give a fuck about, and it's all turned up to eleven to turn as edgy as possible.

I mean, at least for me it's pretty clear that the first guy had some kind of extreme fetish in mind, and then it turned out the story turned incredibly infamous, so everybody in that subfandom thought "oh, yeah? We can do worse". Because that's how people work. There's a point in which I'm fairly sure it's not that much about getting aroused by the story, it's about getting people mad. And with you, it worked.

Seriously, PP, it's better to just get away from this kind of stuff if you know you're not gonna like it. This is the kind of story that can't be reviewed, because the plot/writing/pacing/characterization/grammar matter absolutely nothing. It's all about the idea and about being into it. Yelling about it won't stop it, insulting the people that enjoy it won't do anything, trying to reason how it's awful will just make everybody think the guys are winning. I don't think they're trolls, but I'm fairly sure the "everybody else hates us, so we're kind of cool 'cause of that" angle is prominent in the FOE subfandom.

So yeah. Why do you even bother making a review of this, man? Although seeing your reaction was pretty funny. I guess this was worthy. But yeah, remember that old blog when I mentioned how there are constructive reviews that help the author and AVGN-like reviews that are merely entertaining? Any kind of analysis of FOE has to be the latter, because there's just no use in trying to be constructive or saying this story is "wrong". Does this even count as a story?

Eh. Who cares. The blog was funny, that's what matters here.

Sorry for your mic, by the way! I hope you can fix that shit. My laptop's battery exploded recently outta nowhere, so I feel ya, man.

Honestly, I have no issue with people having that kink. Hell, that's what fiction porn is good for: fantasizing about stuff that you would never do IRL. Okay, yeah, it takes the entire thing waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too far, but still.

My big issue is the story itself... because it's shit. Everyone is either out of character or playing hot potato with the Idiot Ball.

PP, you should check out Though Hell Should Bar The Way, by O. It really is a fantastic deconstruction of the world, and tells a story of hope and rebellion. The writing and characters are great, which is to be expected if you know who the author is(it's an alt, but I won't say their name.) If nothing else, it's an AppleDash fic that I like. Let me say that again: It's an AppleDash fic... that I like. That right there should tell you how good it is! :ajsmug:

Also, I was going to type a big huge comment about why the FOE world is shit, but then I remembered you can just red my comments on O's story. Also, O's comments are a great quick and dirty explanation as to why it sucks.

I just finished reading Blood Meridian (which I strongly recommend), and while I haven't read Fall of Equestria, I would be surprised if what goes on in it is nastier than what McCarthy came up with. The distinction being, of course, that McCarthy is neither a shitty writer nor gratuitous. You can have unspeakably awful characters doing unspeakably awful things, for no reason and with no consequences, so long as you both have a point and make it well. It... doesn't sound like Fall has either of those things.

I will also say I watched Necromantik (which I strongly don't) for Halloween. Point there, is that if you're going for shock and horror, at least set it up well enough that you can truly glory in it. Glory, not wallow.

I've been mostly out of the fandom for a while. Is this a story people are actually talking about, the way most of those picked for vs. blogs are?

Remember, Fallout: Equestria has a colon in it. Always make sure to use that colon in its acronym. Like "FO:E" or "Fo:E". Don't let FO:E be confused with this... thing...

I remember reading that story. It was a train wreck in the worst possible way, and I couldn't stop looking. I actually got all the way to the end, and I still can't believe my eyes got away from it without bleeding. Ugh, I wish I'd never heard to that AU. I don't mind the fanart so much – let the basement dwellers have their kink – but oh God, the story! :pinkiesick:

There's a reason I have everything associated with it blocked on Tumblr and refuse to personally post it on EQAD.

All I know of Fall of Equrstria is all the shitty glam-rape r34 from the tumblr and artist. It's all like the shit on a Japanese sex gameshow or college sorrority hazing porn. Rows of mares waiting their turn on the dildo obstacle course. I am being 100% literal.

Fall of Equestria is the pony stand in for Cross Ange. It's just awful and revels in it for tittilation and fanservice rather than making it meaningful.

Edit: Althouh, tumblr-wise, I was more offended by the Diamond Dongs.

And no. Do not look into Cross Ange or Diamond Dongs.

Then a spawn of side fictions came out of dark crevices, but now we see when to tread lightly.

2570366 Jake has the right idea here. If you want to see proof that no matter how terrible and stupid and ugly something is, some mad genius will make something beautiful out of it.

2570444

I appreciate that, Alex. This shit keeps turning up on derpibooru, and not getting flagged because some fuckweasel didn't tag the series it's from so it drifts across my dash. God, I didn't think I'd find anything this fandom could come up with more demoralizing than Fallout Equestria and Cupcakes, but the fact is that this shit is popular.

What the fuck have we come to as a society and fandom that something like this that actively and poisonously does everything in its power to degrade and humiliate female characters seemingly for the sin of being female is not just accepted but popular?

God, I didn't think I'd ever find anything that made me feel skeevier than The Handmaid's Tale but this sure does it.

The thing that bothers me the most about Fall of Equestria is that it cares too much about its setting for its own good. I doubt it would be half as disgusting if it stayed as mere porn-fantasy, and restricted itself to specific scenes and the like – even with shared concepts and a verse of sorts. But the more it talks about the societal structure, or try to show canon characters living in that setting, the more it starts reading like wish fulfillment.

Also, Shining and Cadance are not true collaborators. They were mind controlled. Because, once you fall victim to mind control once and almost lose everything during your own wedding, the last thing you do is take steps to ensure it can't happen again, amirite?!

Oh, and to put the cherry on this shit cake, the story isn't about Twilight having to save the day. IN the end—and I have been told this by people who know the "plot" of this verse—Twilight eventually betrays Equestria and becomes a willing slave because, and I shit you not, she's tired of being in charge and wants someone else to make her decisions for her.

No, I'm not kidding.

See what I mean about everyone being out of character?

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

2570323
Yeah, I know. :B

2570344
I very much get the feeling that Sunny Night is an alt for someone. Probably not anyone I know, unless they're cleverly disguising their writing style. (And if it was, I would think twice about my association with that person.)

2570364
Actually, it's going to be one of the Fallout: Equestria crossovers that I will one day be known for writing. c.c Right? So I won't be able to use that title, sadly. Anyway, I more or less knew what I was getting myself into, but I wasn't expecting to have this kind of reaction. I also had no idea what to expect as far as the writing went. And if the review was entertaining, well, that's about all I can hope for. :B

2570366
It's on the RIL. :B

2570396
This story was a huge, stinky deal when it was posted on the site. The near-even 400/400 vote count will attest to that.

2570444
Good man.

2570480
Will do! Or will not do, as the case may be. :B

2570536
Handmaid's Tale was good though. :O Like Vidatu said, it had a point. This has... gratification. :/

2570631
I am so not surprised. The author's continual comments about "this will not have a happy ending!" led me to believe as much.

Honestly, I'd rather read that weird anthro AU where Twilight was a concubine of Sombra. :| I think that was Kayla-Na's thing, so it's unrelated.

2570742

Yeah, The Handmaid's Tale is a pretty stellar work of alt-future science fiction literature. This excremental bullshit is simply written to cater to those who can't see a strong female character without needing to see them destroyed for their own sexual gratification, and the fact that this is apparently part of the fandom is disgusting to me.

Welp, still not touching this... thing with a 10 kilometer pole.

FOE (all-caps to differentiate from FoE, aka Fallout Equestria)

Weird, Fallout: Equestria's always been FO:E/FOE for me and Fall of Equestria relegated to FoE. Maybe because of FO3 and FO:NV.

Yeah, I have a parody planned. :B

Now, I'm not sure if I want to read that when it comes out...

2570775 I seem to remember that some folks were upset about the lack of rape in Anthropology - there are some sick, angry people in this fandom. It was the main reason I stopped reading Project Horizon; I think the author may be a sadist, and not in a healthy way.

Oh god. You read this shit. Look, I'm never reading anything even tangentally related to it but: Here, just here, cleanse yourself with this. THis is a link to O's user page. O has written a story that is basically Rainbow Dash and Applejack dealing with the aftermath of the whole FoE thing or whatever. I think it's a "Ponies take their world back" sort of thing.

If you must read something related to it, read O's stuff. At least O can write.

2571124

Honestly, I don't think even the good old 'Rape & Revenge' fantasy trope can save this shithole of a concept. Just bury it. I'd suggest a shallow grave.

2571166 I really doubt O's that shallow. But again, I haven't read it.

JTAG has. He'd know better. But O's not really the "I Spit On Your Grave" type.

2571179

Not doubting O, I recall reading some of their 60 Minute stuff and it was pretty competent. I just don't think the premise can be saved.

2570775

You needn't be mad. Most people who like various extreme fetishes don't actually think they are good acts, they are just inexplicably erotic to that individual. It's possible to read misogynistic rape fiction solely because those people think it is hot. They don't actually hate women or anything.

It's like how people who like vore and read vore fics would be horrified by someone being eaten alive in real life.

O

2571200
It's more a V for Vendetta, Hunger Games type take on it, for what it's worth. Very character focused.

But if it's not your thing, I don't blame you.

2570631
That is absolutely delightful to know. Twilight eventually succumbs to the mind control spell, I'm guessing. I'm absolutely good at suspending my disbelief, so what's the harm in one more game of idiot ball? Probably none eh? Yep yep!

I am totally not annihilating my brain at all.

But perhaps something more artful and with more sense can come from Fall of Equestria.Not a group, per se. But it's close enough for those who are Anti-Fall and wish to discuss ideas for stories.

Hmm... it's fascinating to see that people are opposed to FoE, but all for different reasons. Some are opposed to the OOCness and high suspension of disbelief, while others are of a moral purchase, disliking it on grounds that misogyny and rape are bad, even in a fictional setting.

Personally, I think I lean more on morals. I don't think that there's anything wrong with the kinks. But, what sets me off about this is the fact that it's a whole society that has been felled to the debased and perverse. It'd be different if it were an isolated incident with a handful of characters, but it has to be the entirety of Equestria. How's a society to progress if they're all just fucking and crap? Where's the morally righteous to keep things in check if they've become unwilling slaves of the flesh?

I know, this is a fictional universe. But the whole subjugation of society thing about it has got me pissed. Maybe even irrationally so.

Oh, and the OOCness because mind altering spell lol. And the OP of caribou gear is much. It's all too convenient.

It'd be interesting to see how a story on caribou society would hold up. Like, how the hell did they make it in their own society if infinite sex is how they work? Are the caribou in Equestria actually some faction that was banished from their homelands because their ideals of how nations work were kind of very fucktarded?

2571249

Eh, I don't find the setting compelling enough to even question it. The people behind it didn't bother to put any more thought into it than 'super-powered OCs rape all the female characters people like. Oh, and the guys join in too because obviously raping and abusing women and children is the correct way to behave, damn uppity sluts.'

It's a poisonous premise based on pure wish-fulfillment, and not worth engaging mentally. I personally find it morally offensive not because of the Letters To Penthouse (Or 50 Shades of Grey for those of you too young to get the reference) level narrative, but because the author has created a world where this behavior is successful and correct by author fiat which simultaneously claims to be Equestria.

2571233

Actually, no. Twilight is not mind controlled. She just genuinely wants to submit.

Enjoy!

2571322

Let me guess, it just reads as mind control because she's absurdly OOC?

2571322

...

*walks out, nonchalantly flipping a table*

*comes back and nonchalantly stands table back up, realizing it belongs to PP*

Jeeze. Next time you want something to read and be mad about, just go dive into Project Horizons. It has some redeeming features at least and you won't make it far enough for the really bad stuff.

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

2570793
Trust me, it'll be funny more than anything. :V

2571124
That's two!

2571249
2571268
Ugh, I hate to even waste more brain cells on this, but the one question that plagues my mind is "what about female caribou?" I can only assume that the males are so poorly endowed that their women left a long time ago, probably amidst peals of derisive laughter.

2571322
goddammit Jake

2571386
thank you for not break my table ._.

2571474
Actually, the whole reason I even bothered to read this was to do 'research' for the parody. :B

2571475

Oh-ho, no, no, good sir! Female caribou are naturally dumber and weaker than the males, and they have no magic! See, this is where the caribou get their worldview from! It's not a matter of culture or inequality or anything. Purely based on genetics, does are weak, dumb, magicless, and subservient.

Just makes ya feel all warm, and fuzzy inside, don't it?

And I know this because I have a good friend who is into all that stuff, actually one of the major commissioners of the artwork. See, this is why I don't berate and insult the people who are into this... until they give me reason to. My friend has even stated that he has no idea why the idea is so hot to him. It... just is. He's a great guy, and a decently talented author. He just has some jacked-up fetishes. I mean hell, I'm into some pretty kinky shit in fiction that I would never want to see in the real world. You can't blame someone for having a freaky fetish... but you can blame someone for writing a shitty storyline. That is why I berate the stories based in this little world: the story is insultingly bad.

2571233 I know Gabriel LaVier (I think that's his last name, can't remember at the moment, but you've probably heard of him.) had written some FoE Redemption/resistance stuff and tried to gather fellow writers who also hate the universe. He writes a lot of hard fetishes, except, you know, he's also a feminist like myself and many others here who think FoE is crap.

2571493

I have this terrible, completely mad desire to see evil used against evil. FoE counter-fics done on the premise of the Changeling Imperium under their Godess-Empress deciding that these assholes are muscling in on their rightful prey.

2571553

Check out Fall of the Caribou if you want some other-wordly intervention, or any of Gabriel LaVedier's anti-Fall works for some home-grown payback.

2571622

Nah, joke is I really don't like grimdark at all, but it's better than this. :P

2571268

Also, to the credit of the fans of this verse, the males are brainwashed, as well. To their detriment, however, this is done by Shining and Cadance using the magic of the Crystal Heart, now reshaped to be the Crystal Cock. No, I'm not kidding.

To be, that's what's even more horrible about it, though. Everyone always sees the females being mistreated, and that is indeed horrible, but think of the males: they are being brainwashed into believing this stuff! Imagine being Spike or Shining Armor, and waking up one days to see that for the past however long, you have been controlled into torturing, raping, and mutilating your best friends, sister, or wife?

2571634

You're right, it sucks and will suck for them later assuming there is ever a later that includes the end of the mind control. Which one would doubt from the way that universe is built. How much worse is enduring years if not lifetimes of torture at the hands of your own brothers/fathers/husbands/sons while being fully aware of what's going on, though. The guys get the cop-out of 'oh, that was the mind control magic' and can excuse themselves from agency in what they've done. The ladies get to hope they live that long... or more likely hope they don't.

God, this is more thought than I ever wanted to put into this trash. Did they ever even bother to explain why everyone hasn't starved/frozen to death given that with Celestia and Luna crippled there's literally noone who knows how to manipulate the day/night cycle left?

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

2571634
It's actually cutting social commentary with the caribou representing the patriarchy.

2571650
Personally, I hope they all die.

2571650
Once again, I know way too much! In this verse, Tia and Lina do NOT really control the sun and moon! That's always the best way to endear me to your AU: throwing out the very third thing we learned about this world!

Once more, contrivances used to justify the retarded.

2571774

Riiiiiight.

Okay, done thinking about this. These people couldn't worldbuild their way out of a fruit salad. Time to go back to writing squishy pony romance. :yay:

The worst part about it isn't the extreme fetishes. No, the worst part is that people treat it like it's a serious story with serious content, rather than just a mile-long fap festival. There's literally no point to Fall of Equestria beyond providing a vehicle for female subjugation fetishes. Good stories that have these Master/slave societies do so as a form of social criticism as well as erotica, or even in place of it. For example, The Passion of New Eve is a book that contains extreme sadomasochism, but it does so as feminist commentary, rather than full-on eroticism. Other themes include race and class struggles. Fall of Equestria could be argued as an ironic critique of brony erotica and patriarchal society in general, but I don't really see how marching unicorn mares from a canonically matriarchal society down the street with their horns shoved up their asses comments on anything at all except for the people who commissioned and wrote it.

O
O #47 · Nov 3rd, 2014 · · ·

2571774

Once again, I know way too much!

I feel your pain (in a totally unsexy way.)

PresentPerfect
Author Interviewer

2571806
Are you one of those entities that appears after its name is said enough times? :O

2571520

It's a-me! Mario! I mean, Gabriel!

The last name is BS, I made it up for a French-Canadian character and eventually used it everywhere. But actual French people, oddly, think I'm actually French (the name is meaningless but looks close to an actual word that means "The woodsman" or "the forester" which means it's like English names that are based on real words like Forrester, or which suffered corruption like Sheriff, which used to be, if you can believe it, Shire Reeve.)

Welcome to the fold. The terrible, terrible, mind-scarred fold.

I welcome your parody.

Login or register to comment