Twilight Sparkle's Literary Preferences · 12:58am Aug 22nd, 2014
PresentPerfect just promoted a blog by ChuckFinley on good & bad shipping. In the interest of fairness, I want to promote... another blog by ChuckFinley: Your Headcanon Is Wrong, or, Twilight Sparkle's Literary Preferences.
It's long. What I get out of it is that there's a great temptation for people who don't understand an obsession to lump it into a general category: Twilight likes books. Dash likes sports. Rarity likes fashion.
Most people aren't like that.
Given Twilight's character and background, she's probably not going to recommend Catcher in the Rye, Camus' The Stranger, or Lolita. In fact, Twilight wouldn't resonate with much of our great fiction, since she has the disadvantage of living a charmed life as a super-hero in a fantasy land.
Similarly, it's not enough to say, Rarity loves fashion, therefore she will like bell bottoms. I don't know enough about fashion to know what she would like, but I'm guessing it's not bell bottoms, not even when they were trendy. Rainbow Dash loves competitive flying, but that doesn't mean she'd like NASCAR. A NASCAR driver never gets to put the pedal to the metal and go all out, nor to do fancy curves or weave in and out of traffic. It's subtle and requires a lot of planning and patience, and Dash would hate it.
(This does not apply to Pinkie and Fluttershy. They're indiscriminate. EDIT: Okay, Pinkie is not indiscriminate; thanks, those who caught that.)
Yes, to both blogs.
P.s. Metal not medal
Not so. Even Pinkie has party styles she dislikes. Cf. Grand Galloping Gala, Canterlot Garden Party, et. al. Heck, going by her choices for entertainment at the royal wedding, she's actually kind of overspecialized.
But yes, Fluttershy is a friend to all living things. And Applejack is a friend to all apples.
2389838 Good point re. Pinkie. You should write a fic about the one apple Applejack doesn't like...
2389826 You medaller.
2389851 Hm..I could see her getting sick of crabapples.
Oh, so that explains why I don't get literary fiction.
2389886
Applejack believes, deep in her bones and deep in the taproots of her family tree, that there's no such thing as a bad apple. When she was young, she struggled with the existence of crabapples. They didn't seem to have any point at all, except to bring down the good name of the fair genus Malus. She never understood why Granny wouldn't let her chop down the stand of them on the edge of the orchard.
But every apple has its place in the barrel, and sometimes success can have strange consequences. One year, the orchard had a fantastic harvest, and was able to sell all its apples as first class eating, pie, and cider apples--hardly any even had to be sauced. When it came time to make Zap Apple Jam, however, they found they didn't have enough apples to process for pectin to make the jam set! And that is when Applejack learned what even the lowliest, sourest, woodiest crabapple is good for: if absolutely nothing else, it can be rendered down for pectin and used to support its sweeter, flashier cousins.
Anyway, long story short, Sweet Apple Acres' biggest product is 'Soylent Apple', now.
Yeah, it's like when various composers try to do leitmotifs for the Mane Six, and Rarity always gets this neurotic ersatz Mozart (Erzart? Mozatz?), because TEH CLASSICAL. Yes, of course Rarity likes classical music but what kind?
She'd naturally be all over the Russian romantics (does Rarity strike anybody else as being more Russian than British?), but I doubt she'd care much for Baroque except as an aid to concentration. I've heard Baroque described by a professional harpist as "sewing machine music"--and indeed that's what it sounds like. And Glass? Please.
Likewise she'd be into opera, but in that case anyone EXCEPT the Russians. I can't imagine her sitting through Boris Gudenov for anything but the costumes. And her opinion of Wagner would pretty much match Dame Anna Russel's ("...You're exactly where you started TWENTY HOURS AGO! "):
In short, Rarity would be all for anything graceful and beautiful and passionate and dramatic, provided it weren't too ponderous. But here's the thing: a lot of folk music is like that. Classical music, in fact, steals motifs and themes from folk music all the time. So she'd also be into folk music. Not "Tom Dooley" or any of the grim Depression-era ballads but, you know--Steeleye Span, Fairport Convention, Lorrena McKennett, that sort of thing.
Which would overlap extensively with Fluttershy's musical interests.
And Applejack's.
And while she wouldn't necessarily be into Baroque or Mozart she wouldn't mind it, perhaps even know a bit about it due to her interest in the ornamentation and clothing of the period. Twilight of course would be totally into that sort of highly-structured, math-based music, so that would be something she and Rarity would have in common.
Rainbow Dash would be into drama, action and spectacle so of course opera--in the Reader's Digest version--would have immediate appeal for her. I can imagine Rarity explaining the climax of Tosca to her:
"...then she jumps off the walls of Rome into the Tiber River...
"Wow!"
"...thus setting the record for the standing broad jump, as the Tiber is seven miles from the walls of Rome."
"THAT IS TOTALLY METAL!"
And Pinkie? Well, besides high-energy pop and dance tunes, Pinkie would be into novelty songs and parodies--Parry Gripp, Weird Al Yankovic...
...and P. D. Q. Bach. Which of course Rarity would enjoy for its cleverness. And Twilight for its knowledgeability. And Dash for its brio. And..
I leave you with the image of the entire Mane Six in the boudoir of Twilight's new palace, each giggling for her own personal reasons over Oedipus Tex:
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Then we get to the creepy and disgusting animals like tapeworms, blowfish, hagfish, that fungus which jacks the brains of ants, bacteria, and Phyrexian Oblitorators... actually... ah, screw it. Flutters would prolly enjoy them.
As for apples and Applejack... she doesn't like rotten apples? I dunno. Pineapples? Applejack cereal, maybe? Maybe she absolutely loathes iPhones because tech is fancy space magic.
Um.... Pinkie has a VERY specific genre of Party that she enjoys. Balloons, Party Games, Sweets and Cakes galore....
It's often derided as a 6-year-old's dream *, but Ponyville absolutely loves her for them.
However, she was completely out-of-sorts at the Garden Party and the Gala, which are a party of a different genre.
Similarly, I doubt she'd have that much fun at a Keggar, unless someone brought out some games. I can't really see her thinking that Alcohol is a social lubricant if she's been to one of these: she prefers to lower inhibitions through zaniness.
How would she react to a LAN party? Unless they taught her how to Spectate a match, she'd think they were just sitting at boxes and barely enteracting.
And so on and so forth.
*A dream which we fuddy-duddies forget that we enjoyed because they were actually FUN. Less need for small-talk and mingling; you have stuff to do and enjoy yourself! No one can be embarassed, because everything is insane, and everyone is enjoying it equally.
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Thornapples are actively toxic...
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"You said there'd be cake. THAT WAS A LIE!"
2389963 Ann Russel was the absolute TOPS for musical comedy. Listen to the banana bit she does. Roll on the ground funny. And you're right about PDQ Bach being the only composer the M6 would probably all enjoy.
2389993 As opposed to Thornberries, which are actively funny.
2389972 Once wrote a scene : Twilight and Fluttershy are in a swamp where Twilight wigs out a little at the thought of leeches on her, and Fluttershy says something to the effect of "They only want a little blood so they can have babies." Hm. Come to think of it, I used the same stunt in Monster where Trixie discovers a tick on her back...
2389886 Rarity doesn't like crabapples. Or crabanythings, really.
Rainbow Dash would be ALL over Dragonforce.
I bet Shining Armor would like... Ughh... Sublime
2389963
Well, judging by Rarity's parents and her mid-Atlantic accent, my guess is that she "enjoys" whatever is trendy for the Canterlot elite to enjoy. She probably has an appreciation for things which SOUNDS classy - lots of string instruments, I'd imagine.
I would say that the guess of her enjoying folk music likely isn't so far off. Indeed, I suspect she is secretly a fan of some really embarassing, not-at-all classy musician and must NEVER LET ANYONE KNOW.
Especially not Applejack.
Ever.
2389990
I played Hide and Go Seek in a mansion when I was 23 years old, with other people who were within a year of my age. No children.
It was fun.
I actually hate "adult parties". My idea of a party is games and fun and laughter and something to DO.
Dash is athletic and competitive. She would probably enjoy most forms of athletic competition. She is also a thrillseeker.
Twilight is a biblophile. She also is a knowlege seeker. She also is a student of many disciplines. She no doubt has preferences but it is canon that she reads, enjoys, and promotes fiction. She reads for the benefits of reading. Just because the benefits of fiction are difderent does not mean they are ignored.
I agree with advising against personalizing and generalizing a character's interests. But specifically, no you are wrong. As is Chuck.
2389946
Which shortly led in response to that infamous text, the Malleum Malus, and the resulting apple hunts.
horizon needs to write a fic making a pun between the Latin meanings of "Malus" ("Apple" and "Villain").
2390119 You're just saying "you are wrong" without giving any reasons other than "you are wrong".
I think you missed my point re. Twilight. I don't mean she wouldn't like fiction. I mean she wouldn't like all fiction. Nobody likes all fiction.
2390159
Well yes. Everyone has personal preferences.
Some people like Lord of the Rings and dislike 50 Shades of Grey. Some people are the opposite.
She goes on an adventure now and then and she is a librarian the rest of the time. She had no friends but books for quite a few years. Her current experiences probably adjusted her outlook on life and maybe her preferences, but do you really think that how she has lived the last year of her life has some kind of retroactove effect on the previous several which she lived completely differently? I mean she sure as hell didn't get into Daring Do after comming to Ponyville. And she sure seems to still really like it although her adventures since exceed Daring's.
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Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is an Apple. Tell me, what do you do with Apples?
Eat them!
And what do you eat apart from Apples?
More Apples!
Shh!
...
...
Cake!
Good! So: why are Apples edible?
Be... cause they're made of cake?
2390198 I wasn't thinking of Daring Do, which she might very well relate to, so much as books about existential angst, lack of a role model (Chuck Finley's example), obsessive revenge, a mid-life crisis, despair at one's insignificance, the absurd poignancy of hope, the pathetic and comical weakness and viciousness of all people, etc., which make up so much of our "great literature" today.
Ha!
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Many people who read about stuff like that are people with little frame of reference for it.
I specifically avoid it because I have lived some of it.
Twi... she has absolutely no reason to avoid stories based on the trials, hardships, and weakness of those less fortunate than herself.
Equestria may be an overall happier place because of the force of law in their world. But even the best scotchguarding canot completely repel the stain of life.
2389963
To me:
Pinkie Pie and Dmitri Shostakovich go together like chicken and dumplings. Cue up Shostakivich's 9th or 15th symphonies, for instance, 'cause Pinkie's in there jumping around like crazy!
Mike
2390159
What, like:
http://www.fimfiction.net/story/34977/penumbra
2389851
Apples are pome fruits, just like pears. There's plenty of fics about AJ's dislike of pears.
2390269
I'm glad you think this way. It's very clarifying.
2390403
Different genus, though.
2390495
Sorry I posted in the wrong thread.
I posted something dumb in another blog.
Anyway, you seem very vague here.
2390159 Malus Aforethought?
2389999 ...
2390064 Or any speed metal. I'd think it'd have to be played by actual dragons as well, not sure a unicorn's head wouldn't explode trying to play something like Through the Fire and the Flames.
2390118
True enough for me, but I'd still prefer a quiet evening at home or a get together with people I'm already friends with to a party.
I have had fun at parties once or twice, mostly because the theme (nerd ephemera on Halloween) meant I could expect to bond reasonably well with some people there and join in on conversations about things that interest me.
2390159
Well, there is Applejack's ancestor Malice in The Best of All Possible Worlds. She only shows up for one scene, but she's there.
2390159
Or the Malleum Malus Ficarum: the hammer of apples and figs.
Maybe that's the name of her comedian ancestor.
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DO
IT
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I read your comments (and the deleted one in this thread, since it got sent to me in an email) and I gotta say:
Yo, don't worry so much dude.
It's perfectly fine to say 'Author X is a cunt who I can't read because their subject matter is consistently awful even if the prose/plotting/construction is excellent.' In fact, I count grudging praise of my talent plated up with a stinging dismissal of my writing choices high praise indeed.
'This topic is crass and dull' is perfectly legitimate criticism. It's why I hate South Park! Don't be afraid to say shit like that. I mean, you're wrong, but that's cool, so are a lot of people who don't like my work.
Also, once upon a time I did write a balanced story including shipping.
2391437
I know. But I was really really under the weather yesterday. I was basically not myself. I made multiple bad judgements and decisions and then became incredibly paranoid about whether or not this was one of them.
I feel a lot better today.
But yeah.
Also thanks for the link but grimdark AU upsets me. Teenage pony orgy fics don't. I just don't like them.
Except fully grown dragons and cockatrices.
Incidentally, Rarity denounces bellbottoms in Testing, Testing, 1, 2, 3.
2389946 I love you...You clearly need to immortalize this in a ficlet collection. So I can fave the heck out of it.
2390109 There is a fic where Octavia secretly plays the fiddle. Can't recall the name.
2400467
Fiddlesticks?
2391283
In Warhammer 40k, there's a branch of the Inquisition called the Ordo Malleus. They hunt daemons. And, unsurprisingly, the Inquisitors tend to use warhammers. Alot. So... daemonically possessed apple and fig smashers?
Or maybe it just means the Ordo Malleus are one of the many, many villains in 40k
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2400471
Saaaaay... speaking of Octavia, what kind of cello music would she like from today's cello bands?
Maybe the cello covers of 2Cellos?
Look at those bows 0_o
Maybe the ruff n gruff sounds of Rasputina?
Or maybe the tandem of a trio of cellos working together to bring emotionally evocative notes to the ears in Apocalyptica?
Would Octavia like any of these? Would she enjoy 2Cellos for their inventive uses of the cello, or condemn them for heretical play styles involving damaging their instruments? Would she enjoy the style of Rasputina, or dislike the way their note choices come out? (I meant clothing style, btw :P) Would the success of Apocalyptica impress Octavia, or would she find fault in their theme, which is often tinged a bit dark?
Or maybe Octy would eschew all of the cello rock and stick with classical music? There isn't much to work with, seeing as she's had only one angry line in Rainbow Rocks. That doesn't tell anything about her personality. So... does this blog topic have any merit on the topic of Octavia, or should it be that people just should, y'know continue to make stuff up for her. Or maybe she does, somehow, have a particular taste in cello noise.
Personally, I'm surprised I haven't seen her crossover with any of these bands with any frequency. I mean, they're all just begging to be ponyfied based on having the same instrument as a pony. That's a good reason, right?
Hilariously, a few years back, I managed to convince my friends that Apocalyptica had done a cover of Wooden Toaster's Avast Fluttershy's Ass with this.
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Tagged because I'd bet you'd like One with Apocalyptica. Also, Rasputina is kinda baroque, I guess? Hurr durr. Apocalyptica definitely has done some baroque songs. Does that work for Rarity?
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Tagged because 2Cellos annihilates their bows and strings with more frequency than Herman Li breaking guitar strings (broke one while recording Through the Fire and Flames. Kept on playing), while being similar in that they make sounds you didn't think possible with their respective instruments.
2390829
Tagged because foamy. But mostly because the Uncle of Machines wants to see if you're a fan of cello rock
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If you believe in Octascratch, she would react with horror, then be slowly drawn against her will into listening to them over and over.