Fanfic Reviews – Comedy Edition · 9:01pm Aug 4th, 2014
More comedy! I hit a patch of those in my reading, so have a bunch. Below you will find:
A Day in the Life of Truth Seeker: Ponyville’s Resident Conspiracy Theorist
Bitter Harvest
A Rock and a Hard Place
Cousin Braeburn Writes a Crop-fic
Twilight Gets Divorced
The Wonderful Life of Berry Punch
Today is a Good Day to Die
As a reminder, scores are in a 0~10 scale, with 3 representing a truly mediocre fic.
JohnPerry – A Day in the Life of Truth Seeker: Ponyville’s Resident Conspiracy Theorist – Comedy
It’s all in the title.
This is one of those stories that gets in and out with precise timing, just long enough to explore the premise without making it dull or repetitive. It is ridiculous in the best possible way, with many well used puns and references (specially that Life of Brian one). It also uses the Mane 6 well, enough to make them relevant without them overtaking the story, or having them center their lives around the OC for no particular reason.
This wasn’t a laugh-out-loud type of comedy, being more subdued, but was still funny enough. However, the story feels a little too disjointed, amounting to little more than a collection of anecdotes. This allows it to be short and get to a lot of material, but also leads to a lack of cohesion. Funny overall, perfect for light reading, but might have been better just biting the bullet and being built as a series of vignettes.
Why it should be read: For a good exploration of the premise of a conspiracy theorist living in Ponyville.
Stand out moment: Pinkie reading the newspaper because it makes Truth Seeker happy was perfectly in character.
6.5/10
Esle Ynopemos – Bitter Harvest – Romantic Comedy
Golden Harvest is certainly not in love with Applejack, and is absolutely straight.
Pure genius! This story is hilarious, full of great comedic situations, very funny dialogue, a great sense of timing, and a fitting, well utilized inner monologue that works perfect in tandem with the situations being presented. All the denial Golden Harvest goes through is perfect, especially in how it reflects in her external actions, such as not wanting to wave, or how distracting Applejack is, or everything surrounding her carrots. It manages to be cute and heartwarming in the same measure.
Her pushy mom is great, and everything to do with her boyfriend. It is one of those fics that feels completely timeless, the type of thing that could have been written in any season at all. In fact, were it not for a small reference to Princess Twilight, and the jokes surrounding the fandom names of Carrot Top and Colgate, I would place this in season 2 or 3. It also uses AJ, and her situation, very well.
However, I must note that it repeats itself a fair bit, and that GH’s insistence crosses the funny into the annoying after a certain point, messing up with the progression, and making some of her actions hard to go through. Still, that doesn’t detract too much from the overall effect, making this a funny, very well paced RomCom full of great moments, and a compelling overall plot arch to boot.
Why it should be read: For a well written Romantic Comedy that avoids most traps of the genre.
Stand out moment: The moment where Golden Harvest kisses Minuette was just perfect – as well as the role reversal at the end.
9/10
Japanese Teeth – A Rock and a Hard Place – Showstyle Comedy
Maud tries to be a rock.
This is a nice, cute fic, the kind that could probably be directly translated to a scene of the show. It uses Maud well, and has good characterizations, particularly related to Pinkie Pie, one of those characters people rarely get right. It is funny, but not terribly so, and is competent enough to be worthwhile. I like that it gets what makes Maud tick, without overemphasizing aspects of the character, specially in how it uses the interaction between those two Pie sisters. In the end, it is nice and funny and well written, but a bit too unsubstantial for my tastes.
Why it should be read: For a cute, showstyle comedy.
Stand out moment: Fluttershy was great in this one.
6/10
Skywriter – Cousin Braeburn Writes a Crop-fic – Absurdist Meta Comedy
Cousin Braeburn Writes a Crop-fic
Quite interesting that my two favourites in this post star characters in blatant denial. This is an awesome fic, bitingly funny and very smartly written, chock full of clever wordplay and puns in that very Skywriter way. In fact, I was very tempted to just copy some highlights and call it a review, they are that good. Suffice to say, never have I seen such sexy descriptions of plants and pollination. It is very well characterized, in its stream of conscience way that alternates Braeburn writing the aforementioned crop-fic, and agonizing about writing it. In that way, it manages to fun of fandom tropes, being meta in the best possible way. My only complaint is that, despite some attempts at the last scene, it is rather flimsy, feeling more like an excuse to poke fun at Braeburn writing the titular fic as a fandom analogue than anything else, but it is funny enough to make up for that flaw. And really, how could I ever pan a fic where ponies yawn heroically, and that contains sentences like this:
"Oh, stuff the bees!" [the cornstalk] will say, tearing off her feathered headdress (or possibly not, depending on how temperate the growing season is that year). "Take me now, in the way of my people, by showering pollen down upon me from above!"
Why it should be read: For the clever, well used wordplay.
Stand out moment: The scene with Little Strongheart (the world needs more Little Strongheart) was cute, and tied up the whole thing perfectly.
9.5/10
Blueshift – Twilight Gets Divorced – Blueshift Comedy
5 minutes into her marriage, Twilight decides to get divorced.
This is the quintessential Blueshift fic – random enough to be creative, but with just enough internal logic to make the whole fairly grounded. This is a great idea, works well as meta-comedy, and the angle of Fluttershy as a Bird attorney was awesome, especially how it was used in the end. However, the fic kinda fell around the middle, with much of it just following the motions towards the end, particularly during the trial scene. Still, there are plenty of great scenes to get you going, and the ending was excellent.
Why it should be read: It is a Blueshift comedy.
Stand out moment: The “characterization” of Flash Sentry as someone that just guards doors.
7/10
Dusk Spark – The Wonderful Life of Berry Punch – Situational Comedy
Berry Punch’s life, most likely a wonderful one.
What is it with ultra-descriptive titles and comedies? Anyway, this is a hard one to unpack. There is a lot to like here, with well used themes and characters. It also utilizes a very unusual headcanon, full of unusual character pairings and interpretations, like Cheerilee and Berry being sisters, as well as Blues and Minuette, and a bunch of others. Other than that, all characters felt like nice additions, and were well used too. Pinchy (Berry’s daughter) was a little too precious, but still managed to work as a child character. Alcohol was also decently treated, and Berry drunk antics were fun, especially her constant blaming of Drunk Berry, even if it is quite a bit depressing.
However, this fic is plagued with writing issues, such as overuse of ellipses, strange word choices and emphasis methods, run-on sentences, and so on. It also has a very strange, yet endearing, pacing. In fact, the fic progress like it is drunk, always walking sideways before returning to the path, with some long pointless asides, and a very meandering focus. As such, it mixes up very interesting passages with terribly boring, almost pointless ones, leading to a very uneven experience. Still, this is one case in which the bad things didn’t really manage to damage the experience too much, and I found myself enjoying this one quite a bit.
Why it should be read: For the druken antics, and some nice character work.
Stand out moment: The whole treatment of Pinchy’s original father throughout the fic was great.
6.5/10
Aragón – Today is a Good Day to Die – Absurdist Comedy
Celestia finds out she is going to die, and embarks on a journey with her sister to understand what she needs to do.
This fic walks the fine line between random and surreal very well, tipping into one or another as dictated by the Rule of Fun. And it is very funny, riotously so, full of bizarre scenes that work very well in context, as well as little running gags that spice up the whole thing quite nicely, such as Luna and Celestia being perfectly disguised by using sunglasses. It is the kind of story where characters can talk about lava tasting like chamomile tea, needing to die more often, or even trying to talk to a dead person on a funeral, and still have the whole thing make sense.
However, I should note that it is wastes a little too much time in certain scenes, beyond what was really necessary to let the story breath. Also, more than once I wound up questioning the logic of Celestia and Luna never having any contact with death, which is patently ridiculous, and not always in a good way. It also lacks a proper ending, feeling more like the author just ran out of material and called it a day. Not that it hurts the overall effect too much, but I wish there was some kind of closure.
Why it should be read: It is surreal and very funny.
Stand out moment: The whole scene with Granny Smith having a creepy obsession with death and funerals, and telling the princesses about it, was pure gold.
8.5/10
Lots of good ones in this batch. I liked several of these.
I thought it made perfect sense that the alicorns had no contact with death. That version of them obviously don't have any close friends, and it's not like they have to worry about family dying. Mostly though, it's just meant to be absurd.
You really can't go with a descriptive title for a serious story. :B Even though I just did that very thing.
2343975 It is one of those things that would at one scene be perfectly normal, and on the next one feel completely weird – mostly during the scenes I wasn't laughing enough.
2347593
Yeah, it is kinda weird in the spot it's trying to hit.
2346407
Sounds like you are saying we can't do that, but you can. Guess it's all who gets the permission from the king of stories first.
2347617
Well, it didn't work out the way I wanted it to, specifically because the story wasn't supposed to be serious at all but somehow turned out that way. :|