• Member Since 13th Aug, 2012
  • offline last seen Sep 12th, 2022

Sarcastic Brony


Give me one reason Celestia isn't best pony. Pro tip: You can't

More Blog Posts29

  • 80 weeks
    The synopsis of "How many enemies have you made today?" and farewell.

    It’s been a wild ride, but I’m tired, and I think I deserve some rest. Before putting this part of my life in the past, I’ll deliver the final nail in the coffin. Below will be a few chapters and the synopsis of the final book “How many enemies have you made today?”. With that, the name Sarcastic Brony will die here. 

    The following chapter drafts:

    Read More

    72 comments · 5,500 views
  • 100 weeks
    I'm done for the time being.

    So, it's been months since my last update. I've worked on a few chapters for HME but yesterday something I've been dreading happened. I had to put my dog down of 17 years. This amount of time isn't common. Saying she was a dog or even family would be an understatement. We've been through a lot of things together. Though, the thing that angers me most is that it wasn't age that took her but

    Read More

    17 comments · 1,981 views
  • 117 weeks
    A holiday update.

    Hey there! It’s been a few months since my last blog post, and I thought today would be as good time as any to give an update on what’s been happening lately.

    Read More

    5 comments · 1,348 views
  • 128 weeks
    Another Siege montage? Yeah, I'm pretty good.

    My last montage for the time being. Still wondering about the anime stuff next. I've really been wanting to rant about this one anime, that I wholeheartedly believe is the worst anime ever made, but we'll see.

    4 comments · 339 views
  • 130 weeks
    HML ending now or soon? (Story Update)

    Story update time!

    Read More

    21 comments · 5,247 views
Jul
15th
2014

Derpibooru : The epic story about how I got banned for 1,000 years. · 2:00pm Jul 15th, 2014

I’m surprised that a few people actually want to know how I managed to get banned from derpibooru for 1,000 years. I’ve got the time, hell I don't even use the blog very much. So maybe that should be something I do? Anyways, this story is full of autism, so reader discretion is advised.

So before starting my little tale I think I should tell you about myself. This’ll help you get a very good idea of who I am and why I did what I did. To put it as bluntly as possible. I am crazy, like, literally. You probably want to know more about what I mean, but honestly, it’s kinda hard to really explain. Basically, I’m never the same person at any given time. I can be emotionless one second and then rage filled the next. Problems my fellow bronies, problems.

Now lets focus on the story. So I was browsing around derpibooru for a nice image for my latest chapter. Nothing was really coming up, so I decide just to randomly browse the front page. My eyes fell onto a single image. Something about it just seemed wrong. So I click it to get a better view. Now, the image in question was NSFW. I could get into that in another journal, but that is not here nor there.

So what was wrong with this image you ask? Simple. It wasn't the fact it was two OC’s doing it. It wasn’t the fact that the posing was ridiculous. What really irked me was the fact that the mare’s privates were horribly inaccurate.

*Insert anatomically correct master race rant here.*

Funny enough. It wasn't about the image being anatomically incorrect. It was made to look human, but that wasn't the main focus. The mares privates were on her stomach! Not even joking. Taking into account of the mares posing, in relation to her legs. That would’ve put her privates where her crotchtits should be. Now, I don't care who you are. You either like NSFW or you don't. I think we can all agree though that a quadruped privates shouldn't be on their stomach!

I was willing to forgive the oc, posing and non-anatomically correct privates. I was not going to forgive the incorrect placements of a mares privates. No sir. So I left a comment on the image. Telling the author to take some anatomy classes the next time he wants to draw a NSFW image. Perhaps the wording could’ve been better, but I was in the kind of mood that saw no wrong with it.

I wasn't expecting a reply from the author. Chances are that it was someone else who uploaded the pictures anyways. So I leave the site and decide to write some more. A few days later pass and I am back on derpibooru looking for a image. I notice in my top bar that someone commented on something I wrote. I go check it out and see it’s the image I mentioned before.

The comment replying to me was not from the author. No, it was from one of his fans. I bet you can already guess what is going to happen next, but, I digress. This fan found the need to call me retarded, stating that I’m incorrect in telling the artist to take anatomy classes, because his version is 100%. She felt the need to say this to me. Yes, I do say she. How did I know? She told me, stating that I have never seen a womans vagina before if I think his image is inaccurate.

She was one of those women on the internet. The ones that find the need to throw their sex at you. Because, you know, they think we give two fucks that their female. I know that some of my followers are girls, so don't take any offense to what I’m saying. Like their are some asshole guys, they're the same when it comes to women. Back to the story.

So I don't get angry, it was one of those moments. I tell her that she is blind if she thinks that the image is accurate. That based on the posing and relation of the characters privates vs her inner thigh. That would put her privates on her stomach if she were on all fours. A rather sound argument I made, very polite as well. So how does she respond?

She tells me that I’ve never seen a womans privates so I have no right to critique the artist. Even going so far as to say that its his ‘artistic style’. A copout for someone who knows they are in the wrong. So now I’m starting to get angry at this point. I comment back that we aren't talking about women, we are talking about ponies and that this wasn't an artist's style but a failure.

She comments back that I am just a ignorant man and that she would report me if I kept making mean comments at her. Yeah... One of those women. At this point I am boiling mad. If I hate anything more than humanized ponies, It's women. Not all of them, mind you. Just a large majority of them. Don't take that the wrong way ladies, I also hate men as well.. In fact, I hate the human race as a whole. So don't take it personally.

So now I was angry. I wasn't going to be talked down by some wanna be feminist douce. So I post one simple comment, intending to hit her right in the ovaries. I told her that I wasn't addressing her, but the artists and that she shouldn't comment unless the MAN speaks to her first. Very sexist, I know, but at this point I was looking to get even.

As it turns out. She just reported me. An admit came in, ignoring all other comments and banned me. ME! Saying I was a bigot, even though he didn't even look at the comments she posted! That isn't where the story ends though. No, I wasn’t going to let this slide. I can be very vengeful when the moment call for it. So, I head over to some friends that I know and rally them to flood this chicks stuff. To be honest, it doesn't take much to get /mlp to flood some feminist. After only a few hours, we get her to take down all her “art” from derpibooru.

Whoever said harassment doesn't work didn't know what he was talking about. So after that fact I felt a little better about the situation. Still not satisfied though, seeing as the admin didn't even do his job right. Lets just say that it gets a ton more complicated after that. War broke out, anarchy rose. In the end they banned me for 1,000 years. And all I was trying to do was show them my night sky..

So that’s my story. Pretty crazy right? So will I ever return to derpibooru? Honestly, you can't censor anyone on the internet. I could go back if I wanted, but I also found another reason why I shouldn't. The artists. Why give derpibooru credit when I can give it directly to the artist? So I’ve decided to avoid derpibooru as a whole. All they do is host OTHER peoples hard work and make profit from it. I find that to be highly unfair.

So, if you read this entire thing then you must’ve been bored as hell! Seriously, who reads something like this? Well, you did I guess.. I even spent the time writing it.. Anyways! Thanks for the support guys.. Who knows, maybe I will be blog’in more.. It’s here , so might as well use it.. But what should I talk about? idk, any suggestions?

Report Sarcastic Brony · 1,734 views ·
Comments ( 38 )

Wow... you are crazy... but crazy equals interesting, am I right?

Anyway, keep up the good work. I really like some of your stories and you even inspired some of mine, so all I can say is this; Good job mate, bloody good job:eeyup:

It always makes me a little sad when I hear stories about people being close minded towards others just to blindly protect something from a simple bit of criticism.

I will say I'm certainly no expert at art, anatomy or what-have-you, but I smiled a little at "crotchtits", I figure "teats" would be a more proper word for it. Though from reading the stories you've posted and you mentioning that English isn't your first language, I can understand that there might be words which you haven't come across before. I won't admit to knowing precisely which words you may or may not know about in the english language (honestly, I forget/remember words all the time and I grew up with the language), but I would like to take the time, since I'm rambling on anyway, that I've really enjoyed your stories up to this point. Though I must say I do tend to see quite a few grammatical errors cropping up while reading. If you'd like to get any extra help with proof-reading and such, I'd be happy to help out. Just send me a mail if you ever need an extra hand (or hoof, if you like). Even if it's only a small contribution on my part, I'd like to help others out for however long I'm here.

Sanity is a place that the majority of the human race never see my friend.
Crazy is the new normal

Man, I hadn't laughed like that in months.

Oh and I guess we're both batshit crazy mate.

I have always said that we all are crazy in our own way and thats good, this world needs more crazy people. And hey, thats the internet for ya i guess, people thinking that they are better than the next guy.:facehoof:

I saw that comment, on that picture. lulz, you got B& for that?

...Thumbs down. Just, thumbs down.

Yes, crazy feminazis are annoying. I don't particularly think that term really applies to the girl, but I haven't read the posts so hell if I know. What I do know is that you willfully escalated matters into a personal attack. That isn't cool. That isn't mature. It's childish, and if all it takes is someone giving you some shit for you to feel the need to attack them like that, you really need to toughen up or get the hell off the internet.

People are dicks, dude. That isn't ever going to change, especially in the anonymity of the internet. But when you respond to assholes by deciding to be a BIGGER asshole, you have stopped being part of the solution. I don't really have another way to express how disappointed in this sort of behavior I am, so... I guess I'll go unfavorite that story.

Serves you right to get banned

2287630
You're gonna un-fave some dude's story for getting into a flame war on a totally different website? ur a faget.

2287459
To think I inspire even a single piece of work definitely makes me feel good. Thank you. :pinkiesmile:

2287500
I think the question is. Was there ever a normal to begin with?

2287567
Good to know I can give some people joy with my insane antics.

2287627
Yup, for 1,000 years.. Ain't that some shit?

2287630
You're probably right. I guess I should start by not caring what you think.

2287661
It was a pretty bad picture though, who would think that a vagina is supposed to be located where the navel is?

2287661
:pinkiegasp:
You've become the nightmare moon of derpibooru!
Only difference is that you have a valid reason :ajsmug:
AND it isn't that bad to be banned from there :trollestia:

Just another unfortunate, but hilarious tale of people getting their jimmies rustled on the internet. Also on another note, I guess you could say you were banished from derpibooru for 1,000 years. Huehuehue. k I'll leave now.

I thought i knew what picture it was untill you mentioned an OC.
I saw this one picture of Futa Rainbow Dash fucking a Solid Sparkle, the disturbing part was that her vagina was in front of her hind legs, well on it's way to her stomach...

So you're crazy? Oh, that is okay, because I love crazy! I have it for breakfast lunch and dinner every day, can't live without it! I need a bit more crazy in my life, because at the moment it is pretty fucking boring. :pinkiecrazy:

Anyhow, I got a laugh out of this blog, pretty entertaining. Wouldn't mind at all if you posted more, regardless the topic. :twilightsmile:

Baltir #16 · Jul 15th, 2014 · · 13 ·

Ahem. To quote your words verbatim:

"Why is her pussy on her stomach? Seriously, take some basic anatomy classes."

"You seriously think that is correct? GTFO. Also, this is NSFW art, so the main focus is the actual sex that is happening. To tell me to not focus on that is borderline retarded."

"Seriously. This is a PONY not a HUMAN you autistic fuck!"

"How about you sit the fuck down and learn YOUR place."

"Report my post if you want. I dont give a fuck. This day and age of the internet, being censored isn’t possible. Ban me? Ha! I can change my IP and keep coming back. So why don’t you just fuck off in your little corner and be a good little girl. Don’t speak unless the MAN speaks to you!"

"Sup faggot. What was that about a ban? Yeah, that shit doesn’t fly around here on the internet. Check that attitude or we might start having problems. I’ll post what I like, when I like you horse cock sucking weeaboo pleb. Ban me again, go head. I got no problem with coming back here and spamming your site with shit. I’ll probably just mass upload an blown out image that will read as several thousand gigs. I wonder how much your server could handle till it denied all requests?

Well, it’ll be fun to find out."

To note is this all happened 10 days ago. Also,

So, I head over to some friends that I know and rally them to flood this chicks stuff. To be honest, it doesn't take much to get /mlp to flood some feminist. After only a few hours, we get her to take down all her “art” from derpibooru.

Whoever said harassment doesn't work didn't know what he was talking about. So after that fact I felt a little better about the situation. Still not satisfied though, seeing as the admin didn't even do his job right. Lets just say that it gets a ton more complicated after that. War broke out, anarchy rose. In the end they banned me for 1,000 years. And all I was trying to do was show them my night sky..

Is an interesting retelling of events, given the artist's art is still very much on the site (and she continues posting it), and all you managed to do is cry about your ban. Your mighty retribution has left us all cowering in fear.

2287771
You seem to be missing a few comments in between. It doesn't surprise me though. Also, she did delete the images I was posting on. You can check yourself. They aren't there anymore, unless she made them private.'

Also, how am I crying? I honestly don't care that I got banned. I only posted this because people asked me why I got banned.

2287804

Oh, I didn't bother including her comments, given they were mostly asking what your issue was with being so aggressive.

And none of her images have been removed, neither do we even have a "private image" feature. All her uploads and all her images either of her artist names are still very much there, and completely lacking any supposed attacks at all. Your friends appear to be all in your head.

Lying about something so petty is very sad.

so you've been banned for what you actually did? I didn't get it.

2287824
I am insane, having trouble telling the difference between fantasy and reality. Plus story writing is my game, and as we all know. The world is just a theater, some of us are actors while others are writers. Those who control or those who are controlled.

No regrets, go all out. If something bad happens you don't give any fucks because you did what you wanted.

Except bagpipes, leave that to the Scots.:derpytongue2:

Whelp, I am commenting for the heck of it. What are your thoughts overall?

Bad admins are bad....

HOW DARE THEY!? :twilightangry2:

2288465
Yes, How dare they respond as they should to threatening attacks of the site

I got no problem with coming back here and spamming your site with shit. I’ll probably just mass upload an blown out image that will read as several thousand gigs. I wonder how much your server could handle till it denied all requests?

Well, it’ll be fun to find out

Attacks towards users:

"How about you sit the fuck down and learn YOUR place."

"Seriously. This is a PONY not a HUMAN you autistic fuck!"

And being an overall bit of a douchebag in every way.
I also like how after the fact the dude entirely blames it on himself being "Crazy". And Over no control of his own actions.
If that's the case, why aren't you in a mental hospital? You know, Where crazy fucks like you who don't believe they have any control over their own actions belong?

By the way, Big fan of pretty in pink and how many friends have you made today. Really nice works of fiction. Well done. :twilightsheepish:

Omg this is hilarious. :rainbowlaugh:

That bitch got what was coming!!! GET REKT GET REKT GET REKT

Damn dude.

Reason no. 1 why 4chan should not exist/should not affect other parts of the internet. Seriously, where do you get off using autistic as an insult?

2287824 I have the distinct feeling you're lying.

Oh, I didn't bother including her comments, given they were mostly asking what your issue was with being so aggressive.

If her comments really were so 'innocent' as you're claiming, you would've included them along with the inflammatory comments that the author said. Your lack of including them, plus your admittance in refusing to post them proves that they were really as harassing and @$$holish in return.

Learn to stop being a hypocrite.

For Christ's sake dude, it's the fucking internet. You should always expect retards/bigots/feminists/etc. to pop up every now and then. Ever since then, I've always followed one of my friend's advice:

"Don't expect to win an argument with an idiot so easily. Instead, let them have their petty victory in their fake reality."

In other words, the moment you realize that the person you're arguing with is a COMPLETE and UTTER idiot, just call it quits. I'd rather much put out the fire than to throw fucking sulfur into the flames.

So yeah, I do technically say it was 'your' fault, but how am I supposed to know what really happened? I mean, there's so many variables as to how/why you got banned and such. For all we know, the mod was probably some cockstroking neckbeard taking things to the extreme just because it's a woman.

Also, if you really feel ballsy into trying to dropkick the argument for your favor, remember; it's all on you from that point onward.

XD That's fucking hilarious GG m8. When you play the Game of Internet Arguments you either win or you die, there is no middle ground.

Cant really blame Sal here. He got banned and fell back on his training. which was to call in backup and shitpost the fuck out of them. and besides! they never stood a chance! this is Salsav91 we're talking about here! the man who wrote Unwanted Attention. It was over before it began.:eeyup:

xoid #34 · Jul 16th, 2014 · · 1 ·

2288493
You seem to have the impression that mental institutions are well funded and/or even easy to get someone checked into. Neither is the case. Milder mental disorders that do lead to that sort of behaviour are routinely dealt with via medication, with varying degrees of success or compliance from the patient. Statistically speaking, the existence of someone matching the defining traits of salsav91 being on FiM Fiction is a certainty; don’t be so surprised he’s here.

2289015
If you honestly think that using “autistic” as if it were an insult is even in the top ten you are hilariously sheltered. Besides which, if 4chan never leaked into the general internet you wouldn’t be here today. The fandom wouldn’t even exist as it does today without /co/mrades (and later, /b/tards) spreading the word; MLP:FiM would never have reached critical mass as it did, there would be no Equestria Daily, there would be no Derpibooru, and there would be no FiM Fiction.

2288493
I never said I wasn't in control of my own actions, nor was I blaming it on the craziness. I was just stating that I can be as nice as a saint one moment and then totally flip out the next. P.S Medication isn't free asshole. It costs a lot of money to pay for my prescriptions. Sometimes I have to choose between being sane or being full.

She was one of those women on the internet. The ones that find the need to throw their sex at you.

...And say no more. I get it.

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